Your “They Keep Pulling Me Back In!” Thursday Evening Open Thread

Dammit! I keep trying to avoid the NFL, but stupidity keeps bringing it to the fore:

  • “Aaron Hernandez’s Attorneys Might Argue That Weed Made Him Violent” – Deadspin
    • At first, this sounded like something out of the Jeff Sessions “War on Drugs” playbook.
    • Actually reading the article, and it’s supporting sources, gives the semi-legitimate option of a “diminished capacity” defence
      • to use the football-pun’d quote from the Boston Herald, “those experts could be used in a Hail Mary maneuver to try to erase the mental state needed to convict Hernandez of two counts of first-degree murder.”
  • “Jameis Winston laments ‘poor word choice’ in elementary school speech” – ESPN
    • According to the Tampa Bay Times, “this is a story about a well-intended photo op that had some good in it and some bad”, and then Winston said to a bunch of kids he was trying to motivate:
      • “But all my boys, stand up. We strong, right? We strong! We strong, right? [snip] But the ladies, they’re supposed to be silent, polite, gentle. My men, my men [are] supposed to be strong.”
      • He’s now defending himself against accusations of encouraging women to “know their role” and be quiet.
    • As a reminder, in December, Winston settled a federal lawsuit filed by the woman he was accused of assaulting at FSU. Florida State also agreed to pay the woman $950,000 in January 2016 to settle a lawsuit she filed against the school for its handling of her Title IX complaint.
      • This is the image he is trying to rehabilitate.

This ties into tonight’s discussion topic, raised by Cuntler in our super-secret discussion forum: “Worst thing you did as a kid or your kids have done.” Anything from regular shenanigans to sibling dick-moves. I believe we need to limit the age-of-responsibility for such acts to 12 and under, because any admissions to acts beyond that age might still – in the US – not have a statute of limitations. Unless you worked at Penn State.


Canada 150:

February 23, 1909 – Canadian John Alexander Douglas McCurdy makes the first powered flight in Canada, aboard his plane, the Silver Dart.

Built of steel tubing, bamboo, friction tape, wire and wood, the aircraft was covered in rubberized silk and had no brakes. The flight departed from Baddeck, Nova Scotia, flew for about half a kilometre, and was the first of its kind in the British Empire, a full 6-years after the Wright Brothers first flight.                      (Source)


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Avalanche at Predators – 8:00PM | Sportsnet
    • Coyotes at Blackhawks – 8:30PM | NBCSN
    • Bruins at Kings – 10:30PM | Sportsnet
  • NBA:
    • Knicks at Cavaliers – 8:00PM | TNT / Sportsnet1
    • Clippers at Warriors – 10:30PM | TNT / Sportsnet1
  • NCAA: best options
    • Memphis at Cincinnati – 7:00PM | ESPN
    • Wisconsin at Ohio State – 9:00PM | ESPN
  • Turning Left:
    • Can-Am Duel at Daytona – 7:00PM | FS1 / TSN2
      • Two 60-lap races determine starting positions 3 through 40 for Sunday’s Daytona 500.

In Grade 7, I once deflated all the teachers’ car tires. NOW I’M A TEACHER!

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

No, really, I’m fine.
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

You guys should give Jameis Winston a chance; after all he has a summer reading program he set up for the kids.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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the Alpha and the Amoeba

Watching some Top Gear, reminded me of one of the worst examples of car design ever. This video shows how to open the hood on a BMW i8. The process starts at 1:20 and takes over 3 fucking minutes.
https://youtu.be/fxe_b2GRwok

Senor Weaselo

Who needs simplicity anyway?

the Alpha and the Amoeba

Also, due to the design of the fuel tank, there may be a minute to a minute and a half between the time you pull the lever to open the lid to the gas cap and when the lid actually pops open

Don T

Watching the Warriors game. Favorite thing so far, finally got this:
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Don T

Oh, and a traveling called within a half quarter #Progress

Senor Weaselo

Travel…ling?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

:looks around:
I still don’t get it

Unsurprised

The logo needs a P for additional lulz and because Spanos should die from the clap.

Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
theeWeeBabySeamus

Wow, I’m glad I got all my busy work done earlier.
I’m more fucking useless than usual tonight.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Just landed and laughed my ass off at the banner quote. Now, is LCSS curbside or what?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Am I going to drive halfway across Los Angeles to play poker on the off-chance I’ll see her in an elevator again?

YOU’RE DAMN RIGHT I AM!

Senor Weaselo

Barkley made a swear!
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Romonobyl

I can’t understand y’alls issues with them southern folk (NSFW):
https://youtu.be/UfHtcUZXljw

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That video link should sum it up for y’all.

WCS

I just ate enough tacos and queso dip to kill an ox.

Senor Weaselo

I would call that a good evening.

Romonobyl

Real ones or the crispy white-boy “tacos”?

Senor Weaselo

Goddamn, Ice Giants and Ice Argos goalies putting on a clinic, 1-1 into the shootout.

theeWeeBabySeamus
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

When you said “going the other way” I assumed you were making a joke about Michael Stipe’s sexuality.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hee hee….that woulda been funnier.
Especially since apparently he’s been snaking (giggity) your potential romantic interests.

herodotus450

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Somebody give her an R&B recording contract

litre_cola

When I see highlights for Div 2, Div 3 or NAIA sporting events, I often wonder what kind of channel is airing this? Do you have the highest subscription to your cable provider? Do you basically just get EVERY channel?

Senor Weaselo

The Ocho^Ocho

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

While we’re on the subject of Michael Stipe moving in on my women, one time I got really drunk and hit on Kristin Hersh at a show of hers in Tucson. She very graciously declined my offer to buy her a drink, citing a need to take care of her several children.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfW4-nP2G1Q

Senor Weaselo
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Hmm, maybe this is why – using an R.E.M. song as the leader for Request Line tomorrow; Michael Stipe turns up on this one: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2cuiTbE0Wdg

herodotus450
Unsurprised

Someone’s too fancy for a trailer hitch.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Somewhere, Sill’s head just exploded.

litre_cola

Too bad he disappeared. Guess no Insanity League this year.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Wikipedia editors fucking piss me off. Big Jim Slade is NOT a magical negro.

JerBear50

How dare you, sir. He can be anything he puts his mind to.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It bugs me an inordinate amount – if you want to argue that it’s a racist scene, sure, I won’t dispute that. But there’s nothing happening there that’s consistent with the definition of “magical negro”.

theeWeeBabySeamus

RTD’s fault, RTD’s fault.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TITim3AJYsk

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Romonobyl

Stephen Hawking always looks like he fell from a second story window and landed in that chair.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Well; that is what that fucking disease does to you. Jesus Fuck.

Brocky

For some absurd reason, I assumed his paralysis was a life long thing tied to his intelligence. Like he was a rain man like savant.

Then I saw the trailer for theory of everything, and then i was like oh shit, he was….

and I really didn’t want to say “normal” but i was totally thinking it.

Unsurprised

That’s a perfectly understandable response. It’s a lot easier to react instantly by saying “normal” instead of “not suffering from the later stage symptoms of a disease that has afflicted him for decades.”

Senor Weaselo

If only the rest of Godfather III wasn’t so meh…

Romonobyl

Godfather III was the Fisting Firemen V of sequels.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Ah yes, they keep pulling me back in….indeed.
Friends, remind me again why I still live in the south where I have to almost daily deal with rednecks with whom I share genetics.
Jeebus.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IZ-jATBq9A

Senor Weaselo

At least (to my knowledge) you don’t fulfill the stereotype of dealing with lovers with whom you share genetics?

theeWeeBabySeamus

To your knowledge, huh?
What are trying to say?

Unsurprised

You’re asking the wrong person. I’d move further away if I could but the only option is Alaska, which is basically the South if it froze over.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

My soundtrack for tonight, for some reason. Adrian Peterson thinks I should mind my own business.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m39DWVFK-Bw

theeWeeBabySeamus

Love them. Saw ’em twice (both times opening for REM).

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Not really sure how they got on my radar tonight (maybe the images of Milana pushed a button in my subconscious?).

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

It’s been criminally too long since I made popcorn

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

We will safely and quickly remove your penis.
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JustStopDude

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Senor Weaselo

I was expecting a cat to pop out and attack.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Big Black Richard

We’re living in the darkest timeline. So that means that Tampa Bay wins the next Super Bowl and Jameis goes to the White House and Trump calls him a national hero and gives him some sort of job where he gets to moralize to the rest of us.

On the bright side, Tim Tebow will still languish in obscurity. He will be BEYOND pissed.

King Hippo

I’ve run out of ways to imagine how this shitheap world can get even worse (though it DOES, day after day), but you make a pretty solid case, good man…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

[wakes up]

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU………….

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Don’t ever say it can’t get worse.

King Hippo

oh I knows it CAN and WILL. I just no longer have the imagination/energy for HOW.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
JustStopDude

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
JustStopDude

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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JustStopDude

You like my truck nuts don’t ya?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

And penguins just thought they had to worry about orcas and sea lion eating them for lunch.
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
King Hippo

Pour one out for the grinning Italian who gave us Foxy Footy last season:

http://www.espnfc.com/club/leicester-city/375/blog/post/3067561/the-players-have-failed-leicester-this-season-but-ranieri-has-paid-the-price

He won’t even get to manage the home leg of the Sweet Sixteen ,, smh

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Senor Weaselo

Awww…

JustStopDude

Its shit like this that just helps explain how every major tournament internationally, the Brits expect to win it all, and they their collective shit handed to them in the opening rounds.

How the fuck does he not get the chance at least to finish out the fucking Champions League?!?

King Hippo

yeah, the Brits are very AFC South in the European in-season post-season.

/if you watch enough Lesser Footy, that sentence will almost make sense

JustStopDude

Its fucking hilarious when you think about it.

It would be akin to the US fans expecting the USTMNT’s to win every fucking four years in the world cup. Like legitimately expect the US to win…

If it wasn’t for EPL rules, there would not be a single British player at the top level playing. Not a single fucking one.

Don T

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Don T

Fuck Lester forever. Kanté fucking left. That’s, what, 6-11 points? Christ.
/looks for shoe to throw

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

Admittedly, mah only degrees are in engineering and law-type stuff, but if I WERE an elementary school principal, I don’t think I’d invite high-profile rapists to lecture my students.

I bought my little brother a BB gun against direct parental orders. I was pretty boring as a child/teenager, too.

King Hippo

oh, this might be next season’s Hippo Thoughts pic! CHUH CHUH!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I can’t find a higher resolution one right now. I’ll try later.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Why do they bother putting “share size” on the slightly larger bag of m&ms? They know what’s up.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I’m not sure what you are asking; because we all know that marketing ideas are all very logical.

http://media.giphy.com/media/aBR3ksxKo4fss/giphy.gif

King Hippo

Good old extra fat shaming!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I thought that was the Home Alone size or the Husky Solo size.

Fronkenshteen

That’s a good day for an actor.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That firm puddin’ bounce as the pants slide over……. JFC.

Shogun Marcus

Now? As opposed to always?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

We should give Jamis a break; maybe he was speaking specifically to Kellyanne Conway and Betsy DeVos.
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Fronkenshteen

In all seriousness, who decided to let that piece of shit anywhere NEAR elementary school students?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The image rehab; “heez a born leeder.”

His entitlement complex is only part of the issue.

In the Moose future he spends counseling time being bound and at the mercy of angry peggers so he can learn vulnerability empathy.

Fronkenshteen

“Both US and Mexican officials made no mention of Mr Trump’s proposed wall at the news conference on Thursday.”

And no one asked? If not, it would appear news conferences are a waste of fucking time.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Reporters: “We’re brave.”
Public: “Prove it.”
Reporters: /soil selves, kowtow

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

It helps when you skip reporters who actually ask questions.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m about to get on another plane. So who’s going to lie about picking me up at Dulles this time?

litre_cola

Race you from Calgary. May need a ride back though.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m going to Calgary in May. Want to prank a bachelor party?

litre_cola

Absolutely

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Expect some slacks once we have a detailed itinerary.

litre_cola

That is a good pleat

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Great! See you at 11pm. I’ll be the fat guy.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
LemonJello

/checks schedule
“Not me.”
/opens next beer in fridge

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Senor Weaselo

I’m watching the Jeopardy College Championship. So there’s that I guess?