Your “Death & Darkness Are Rushing Forward” Thursday Evening Open Thread

Luckily, there’s still The Darkness.

NFL Notes:

  • Julian Edelman & the Patriots have agreed on a contract extension. Otherwise, this was the final year of his four-year deal signed in 2014.
    • Also, no one smaller than him is a free agent, so Belichick had no choice – other than scouring the Ringling Brothers unemployment line.
  • Speaking of all things dark & evil, here’s Grumblelord on why the Patriots didn’t submit any rule changes to the committee this year:
    • “We love the rules the way they are,” Belichick told reporters. “Yeah, we don’t want to change them.”
  • Nick Fairley really wants to keep playing, because he’s trying to find a third opinion on his heart condition. It’s probably the four-year, $28 million contract he signed this offseason driving him.
    • “He’s gotten two professional opinions,” Sean Payton said. “The first one was one that advised that he shouldn’t play football again. The second opinion was a little different,”
    • Let’s hope it turns out better for him than Chris Bosh.
  • AP says he wants to keep playing until he’s 37 or 38.
    • Which is easy if you go one-on, one-off like he’s been doing.
    • I’m sure his kids won’t miss him.

Oh Cthulhu, between the Comey hearings and the UK election (bigger news in Canada), there’s little salve in sports today. You’d think teams would release their bad news so it would get buried. Why must this garbage happen during final-round playoffs and/or baseball season?!

Soon…

I don’t know what to make of the Comey hearings. I grew up during the Cold War, so I was raised on Red-bashing, espionage investigations, and the Cold War. The quickest end to a political career in that era was the merest hint of Soviet influence – especially calling someone a “Commie”. It boggles my mind that doddering old men like Mitch McConnell & John McCain would put any faith in anyone who had admitted Russian ties.

By all rights, and not for circumstances, it should be “President Biden” right now, and Chevy would have a $2 trillion loan to make an electric Camaro.

Also, CANADA HOCKEY 1972 RULES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry; got wrapped up in the nationalism for a second.

The UK election is a strange thing, because it’s happening as a result of Brexit, and in the face of the recent bombings. Here are your two main leaders, Jeremy Corbyn & Teresa May

Corbyn is the last of the old Labour hard-socialists, and basically wants to re-nationalize everything Thatcher & Major sold off. Teresa May is a hardcore Brexiteer who sees herself as Maggie 2.0 and wants a majority before going into departure negotiations, so no one will try to argue there’s one year left in her term, so the next PM should appoint the Supreme Court judge finish negotiations. Either way, it seems like a choice between a kick in the balls or a punch in the balls.

Interest will come from the influence of regional parties like SNP & Plaid Cymru, and if the UKIP can carry their Brexit momentum forward now that former leader & future Fox News gasbag Nigel Farage is off the scene. Exit polls prior to putting this article to bed give the Conservatives a probable minority government, so it looks like the Pound is dropping before my trip in July!

Most results should be known by about 8:00AM Eastern, but enough of a pattern will develop before bedtime that Canadian news will begin its requisite navel-gazing and questioning of our traditional links to the motherland.

I’ve got three bottle of Crown Royal on the shelf, and I might need all of them tonight.

      


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Game 5: Predators at Penguins – 8:00PM | NBC / CBC
  • CFL:
    • Pre-Season: Tiger-Cats at Redblacks – 7:30PM| TSN3
  •  MLB:
    • Red Sox at Yankees – 7:00PM | ESPN / TSN2
    • Orioles at Nationals – 7:00PM | Sportsnet360
  • Futbol:
    • CONCACAF 2018 World Cup Qualifying Soccer:
      • U.S. vs. Trinidad and Tobago – 8:00PM | FS1
      • Mexico vs. Honduras – 10:00PM | FS1

If you listen to fools,

THE MOB RULES!

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Wakezilla

This is the first time tonight the post a comment button has appeared in this thread on my mobile.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

So I owe $750 to my school because they fucked me over. The first thing they did was say every credit I have taken was for my first degree counts towards my financial aid on the second one and I should get no money to do another one. I also got a teacher that listed me as a withdrawal after emailing 3 times and posting on the site asking how to esign a fucking syllabus. I even did the first weeks worth of class, she marked me as a non-student and fucked up my financial aid. This class is getting ditched because it has no merit whatever and doesn’t even exist now. I tried to pay twice now just to get this over with, they won’t take my money. I am thinking of just arguing to get them to let me be and not pay them now.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

The class is called Technical Writing. it is useless and the school knows it which is why they dropped it from their school.

WCS

Talk to a lawyer. Seriously. I’m not a legal expert, but, this reads as fraud.

Unsurprised
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

So a friend recommended F is for Family and I am enjoying it so far. I am only two episodes in, but the joke where the kids ran away from a German immigrant they thought was a Nazi, yelling “you see that number on his arm? That’s how many people he killed!” was goddamned brilliant.

Unsurprised

That’s amazing

Unsurprised
Unsurprised
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Those asshole racers are gone now. I know for a fact they didn’t even get a ticket because the police chief has testified to the city counsel for 25 years that they need to not police anywhere but main street and the bars because they can make money there.

Unsurprised

Awesome

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I was at every meeting for like 12 years. I hate everything.

Unsurprised

I would expect nothing less.

Unsurprised

We move to the table jump portion of the Bills Mafia Decathlon.

http://68.media.tumblr.com/879162096c4d51e3b76c748555b5eac4/tumblr_mlgz4ayNz61qh9nffo1_400.gif

Unsurprised

It’s okay. He’s wearing a helmet.
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Unsurprised

Trying a new image host. This time with an image that doesn’t suck.

Is this a really thin dress, or am I hallucinating?
http://ist3-6.filesor.com/pimpandhost.com/1/_/_/_/1/4/x/5/3/4×533/sg-dress.jpg

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I miss 3 minutes ago when this was Daddario

Unsurprised

I’ll post a better version.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Hero

Unsurprised

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Unsurprised
Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I get Little Caesar’s pizza when I am too lazy to cook/shop. This is always the conversation after with my dad

“I can’t believe you bought that garbage pizza”
/opens fridge and pizza is gone
“Did you eat my entire pizza I bought to have as leftovers?”
“Yeah, sorry I ate all of that”

Unsurprised
WCS

Ouch.

Senor Weaselo

Is… is he dead?

Unsurprised

We can hope.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

No, but he’s even more stupid with the concussion than before.

Unsurprised

“Concussions don’t make you jello.” — Trent Green

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

Fargo was really good, y’all. DJ Qualls’s best performance ever.

laserguru

Fuck yes!
I had to explain purgatory to a stoned audience.

laserguru

And here in about 2 weeks, there will be these guys

Opening.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ko-DhvdfgwE

laserguru

For these guys and others.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LBQ2305fLeA

laserguru
laserguru
Unsurprised

Way to bury the lead.

laserguru

There may be a boots on the ground or a boots pointed strait up.

blackroseMD1

Holy shit. Where is that show going down?

laserguru

It’s a one timer at Glen Helen amphitheater just outside of San Bernardino.
Low Commander and myself are going and holy mother of fuck do we have amazing seats.

Romonobyl

Speaking of really great but obscure bands, anybody remember these guys?
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I got to see them years ago in a tiny club in my city, I was mere feet from the stage and had such a great time I forgot to get drunk.
I miss no-bullshit combos like this.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

From time to time I like to poke my head into Fox News world (via their website) to see what they are feeding their viewers. Right now – on a day when the former director of the FBI essentially called the President a liar and laid out a case for him having obstructed justice – their top 8 headlines are about the U.K. election.

Unsurprised

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The centrists fucked over the left, so it’s kind of like Shitsmas even though by all rights May should be kicked out on her ass as the dumbest head of government since, well, humans migrated to the island.

laserguru

Hello DFO!

Got a date to see these boys tomorrow.

First time in a long time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H4fD4BNMH78

Unsurprised

I’m proud of myself for socializing well and having a good time and not making an ass of myself.

laserguru
laserguru

I admire your improved state.

We can build on this!

Unsurprised

Indeed!

litre_cola

They are moving a house down my street tonight. It is quite interesting as I live at a very busy thoroughfare. They have made parking awful for a week now, and now 1 car blocks their path, Justice.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Poker, darnit.
Someone even made a new 7 card table for WCS (yeah I know it was you, I’m yankin’ ya).

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

There are 2 people straight up racing around my neighborhood. It is obvious from the engine sounds they are both driving Honda Accords but also obvious they are doing 100 in the middle of a residential area because I owned an Accord and know what it sounds like at various speeds.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

One of them just passed my house and ignored the stop sign at at least 70 as I posted that last thing

Unsurprised

Hopefully they kill themselves and not anyone else.

Senor Weaselo

But they have every sticker that screams “ricer” known to man, so they must be fast!

Brick Meathook

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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

So in news you may have missed. Trump also defunded national parks today and got a bill passed that lets banks do whatever they want again.

WCS

Good thing we live in a democracy, where voters are free to learn and decide which candidate best represents the values they have!

Senor Weaselo

“Education? Sounds expensive…” -Voters

WCS

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Unsurprised

Corgi Day at the Beach!

Unsurprised

I will definitely volunteer for this.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

So McCain’s response to everybody thinking he was having a stroke while trying to question Comey was to say everyone is too stupid to understand his line of questioning. I want an age limit on Congressmen.

Unsurprised

I just want him and all of Arizona to die. No offense blaxx

Brick Meathook

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

So I guess the thing that stuck with me from Comey’s testimony is his eagerness to discuss the prospect of audio recordings of his meetings/dinner with Trump. I don’t think he’d have been so aggressive about that if he wasn’t confident that they do, in fact, exist.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

I’d say “pray for entropy,” but entropy is exactly what’s going on with the Jets.