Your Lazy Saturday Fuck It’s Hot Outside Open Thread

Is this an excuse to post the above header image?

Yes.  Yes it is.

As I write this,  the last two matches of the Confederations Cup Group A have wrapped up.  Portugal has easily beaten New Zealand 4-0 and Mexico has beaten the hosts Russia 2-1 which means that we await tomorrow’s results to see who takes on Germany and who takes on Chile.

Right now,  Portugal is #1 in Group A and will play the #2 of Group B. Mexico will play the #1.

What else is going on today?

/ puts hand on chin and looks pensive

NASCAR is in Sonoma this weekend! That means they actually turn RIGHT this weekend!

There is always golf too.

What else?

Um,  I’m washing my car today!

I’m sure there’s other stuff too.

OH! I almost forgot! AFL tonight!

Cats v Dockers

Tigers v Blues

Saints v Suns

***

Ok,  so,  can we talk about that banner image?

I say it’s factually incorrect since Steely is frowning.  That fucker loves getting pissed on! Just like our President. Own it, Trumpy, own it.

Other comments heard in the DFO back office:

That dog has no dick and no balls.  Just like Cleveland. 

That image of Flacco is very realistic.

Well,  that about wraps her up.  This is the 200th word,  so I’m past my quota.

Enjoy the day,  kids!

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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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JustStopDude

It….it has been…

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It has been one of those nights…

For some reason, I came to in a bus station…

Fronkenshteen

“Fire Lake” is the best Bob Seger song. COME AT ME, BRO!!!

Romonobyl

Travellin’ Man/Beautiful Loser from the Live Bullet album. NO ONE DENIES THIS!!!!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Yeesh, going into the 4th quarter, Brisbane fans must have felt like Apollo’s wife in Rocky IV.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Orioles suck so much they can’t even figure out how to break a turrible record.
TB should feel shame.
(oh yay, O’s won….I forgot)

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Bloody Lethal

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Bloody Lethal

Need the s now.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m an idiot and accidentally messed up your link. Forgiveness please.

theeWeeBabySeamus

O’s currently up 8-3.
How wrong is it that I’m now sort of rooting for Tampa Bay?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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...

Every time I see Ichiro hit, I wish he had played in the MLB from age 20 so he could have erased Pete Rose legacy.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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I wish Pete would have done a lot more coke.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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We missed one yesterday.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Looks like we missed “two”.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Watching the GWS replay while lady BFC naps laying on me. If I had beer within reach, this would be a damn fine way to spend an afternoon.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

I bet Hoda has a great set of tits.

I bet Kathy Lee has a fourth set of tits.

That is all.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Dat Azz

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I want pie.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Semi-sweet morsels are a helluva drug.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Prolly a good thing I wasn’t a “Make a Wish” kid.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

If’n your zygomatic arch ain’t all busted up n junk, then you’re not really shootin’ !!!!!!!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

If’n your zygo…. If’n your zeego… If’n your z…. If’n your face ain’t all busted up n junk, then you’re not really shootin’ !!!!!!!!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Sorry, sometimes the redneck in me yields to the dude that went to school.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

Fun fact, she’s currently married to Brock Lesnar, so go ahead and ask her out.

I only know this because I googled her, thinking she was dead, and found this out.

I should stop drinking,

Spanky Datass

“A tie … in week one of the CFL? I just don’t understand those Canadianese people.” Donovan McNabb

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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litre_cola

Sir I believe the Liouns play the Edmonton redacteds this evening. DONT TURN THE GAME OFF EARLY BALLS!!!!!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

His reaction is priceless.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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...

I lol’d at this.

I also want to know if there’s a non-derp-faced version.

theeWeeBabySeamus

2 runs to go and the O’s break the record.
Jeebus their pitching sucks.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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...

I heard about this streak a few days ago and it’s wild.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’m hoping they win 6-5. But I really wanna see this horrid record broken.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Seems legit.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

That image of Flacco is very realistic.

So which of you hateful jerks said that?
Oh yeah, it was me.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Fronkenshteen

Inappropriately drunk again. Balls.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Wakezilla

Holy shit snacks it’s hot as balls in here. Baby Wakezillaette is napping so we’re stuck.

Stupid NHL amd their stupidity. The NHL draft started yesterday at 4pm pacific time. Wanna know who can’t watch the draft? A lot of hockey fans on the west coast who are just getting off work or have another hour to go.

Today, round 2 started at 7am pacific time. Da fuq is this bullshit?

Bloody Lethal

Never watch a draft.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Oh, so we’re not using “DFO back-office” as a euphemism anymore?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

That’s “back orifice” to you, Pal!!!!!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

HE’S NOT YOUR PAL, BUDDY!!

King Hippo

I ain’t enjoyin’ fuckall until Week 1 of pre-season, Mr. Man!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

True Story! My meanest teenager is named Claire.

/I blame her veganism, though she got mean before that

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

This is insane. I took a bunch of photos of the sunrise and I should be at the Saturday Market or the rose garden or waterfront or anything other than watching Arrested Development.

Unsurprised

For now, have a collage.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

I couldn’t get into collage.
I went to NC State instead.

(shit, I just took Hippo down with me inadvertently)
((meh, he’s resilient))

laserguru

It’s already a balmy 82 in the glorious Cajon Pass with a projected high of 97.
The gates to the show open at 2:00.
We’re gonna get cooked aren’t we?

Unsurprised

Tastes like mayo on white bread.

laserguru

It’s nice knowing I won’t be the whitest one there.

Unsurprised

Season 3 of Arrested Development is so amazingly good even compared to the first two seasons.

King Hippo

Charlize Theron always helps.

Unsurprised

Her whole plotline was hilarious.

Unsurprised

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Is it funny that all I can think about is how the water doesn’t seem to actually be touching her? This showering model is a PHONY!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I think Baltimore needs a new mascot. He can be a heroin addict that feeds his habit by burglarizing construction sites. His name: Stealy McBeam.

/rimshot

Unsurprised

I could swear I’ve seen one.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Here’s the original “A Greening To Remember” banner image. I worked hard* on it, so I wanted you folks to see the full thing.

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*not that hard. I worked a lot harder on that “makes sense/cents, enough about Tiki Barber” bit.

Don T

That piece is somewhere between
the batshit-visionary spectrum.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Obviously the banner picture wasn’t taken during the playoffs, because in that case the Bengal would be pissing all over itself.

JustStopDude

I really need to clean my place. I have been on the road for about four weeks. The place is a mess. I got a pile of mail to go through.

But the bird and I are just sitting on the back porch and I am getting good and drunk…

I don’t even care how hot it is.

Unsurprised