I just don’t have much in terms of creativity today, so I apologize for going to my weekend well to tie something into the Miami QB situation:
NFL News:
Break out a fresh bag of “Feline Pine”, because Jay Cutler is going to start this Thursday.
- At most, he plays the first quarter.
- If he looks good, or at least good enough, then he’ll probably get a half in Week-3.
- It’s the best for odor control, because he’s going to stink up the joint, you see.
- Also, it’s the clumping formula because the Ravens.
- At most, he plays the first quarter.
- Another Dolphins note: They signed Ken Griffey Jr’s son Trey to a tryout contract.
- He was cut by the Colts, who signed him as an UFA after the draft.
- He played WR at Arizona.
- If this fails, I’m sure the Reds or Mariners will sign him to a minor league contract.
- He was cut by the Colts, who signed him as an UFA after the draft.
- To avoid paying an injury settlement and taking a $4 million cap hit, the Eagles waited until Ryan Matthews had been medically cleared to return to practice, and then after an hour had passed cut him. (Based on the timeline of the stories filed.)
- In pro wrestling, it’s called “getting future endeavored”:
- Well, it appears Zeke is going with the “crazy & vindictive bitch” defence.
- Elliott will claim that Tiffany Thompson targeted him with false claims after he tried to end their relationship.
When Ezekiel Elliott told Thompson that she wasn’t welcome at his birthday party, she allegedly said, “That’s the worst decision you made in your life. I’m going to ruin your life now.”
“You are a black male athlete. I’m a white girl. They are not going to be believe you.”
Finally, if you want to be angered by the state of sycophantic journalism, have a looksee at what nfl.com has up about Tom Coughlin’s return to Jacksonville, and what he predicts his future holds.
It makes Peter King look like Bob Woodward.
Tonight’s sports:
- MLB:
- Rays at Jays – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
- Tigers at Rangers – 8:00PM | FS1
- Orioles at Mariners – 10:00PM | Sportsnet1
- WWE:
- SmackDown – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
- again, the “go-home” show before SummerSlam
- SmackDown – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
Thank God preseason games return tomorrow. I DON’T WANT TO TALK TO PEOPLE RIGHT NOW!
I should go for a walk. That’s why I’m tired. I haven’t done shit and my body thinks I’m sick or something. Or some shit. Point being that I need to get out and maybe even talk to people because I haven’t and I feel like shit. Also, here’s a hot girl in a wet t-shirt.
We might be in the same spot-I forced myself to go for a hike today. It was only 4 days after I promised myself I would.
/one step at a time?
Indeed.
How much sleep are you getting? When I get several nights of three hours of sleep, my body will act fluish which is my body’s way of saying “Turn off the Damn TV and go to bed!”
Take the stairs!
Fouled FC Cincinnati Player: “You fouled me!” (shoves opponent)
FC Cincinnati Teammate: “Calm down. We need you focused in this big game.”
Cincinnati Bengals: “Calm down? Minor league teams are weird.”
Those two are onto some ungodly chemistry this year
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfTxnnA_l90
Oh yeah. Its hilarious to me, but NJPW is pretty much the polar opposite of WWE.
There is almost no talking what so ever in the ring. JR’s in his usual A game form. The matches are entertaining as hell.
Even the low level scrubs are damn entertaining.
It’s what happens when you book it like an actual sport. It helps when half your talent has fought in/created MMA and know how real violence looks. It also helps when you book a month long tournament and have the wrestlers act like they’ve actually been in a month long tournament.
Dear God. I’m watching soccer.
Damn you, FC Cincinnati!
Smackdown is getting pretty interesting…
I think its John Cena versus a child.
Ha! I went to a USL game on Sunday. It turns out Portland’s USL team (the JV version of our MLS team)is the worst in the entire league. It was still a pretty good game vs. Sacramento, which is ranked in the middle of the league.
Here’s the Sacramento Tower Bridge Battalion. I admire the dedication to drive up from Sacramento just to watch a B team play for maybe 1,000 people.
MMMM, tacos. . .
6:45: That actor that played the Emperor in Star Wars. I wonder if he has a TV Tropes page.
9:30: Well that’s one wasted evening.
You knew what you were getting into visiting TVTropes.
Had no idea that the Canadian Summer Oympics had gained traction elsewhere.
I don’t get WWE anymore.
I only see it once and a while…why are they doing a Twin Peaks parody?
YOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Fashion Files is the fucking Truth, sir.
Gotta start at the beginning….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KgBnFGd1Ixs
I don’t watch Smackdown, but on the Wrestling Recap page on That-Site-That-Shall-Not-Be-Named, they call it a self-aware entertaining part of the show.
No idea. I haven’t watched it in awhile. Every so often, I’ll see a commercial for their PPV and more often than not, they don’t even state who’s fighting. It’s literally a few clips of nothingness, followed by the name of the PPV. If I knew who was fighting, maybe I’d tune in?
It is Tuesday.
I hate you now…
One hand for the boat, one hand for yourself.
Hey, 3 out of 4 knew to watch for the boom.
That’s 75% success rate.
Fuck the other guy.
/tries to make a gooseneck joke
//fails
Ice P*ts looking to trade Pasternak? They sure like to trade really good 21 year old players (see: Kessel, Phil and Tyler Seguin)
Lord
This is why we use dawn to clean the messiest slicks.
They saved those….. birds…. with Dawn.
Definitely not a fan of any tattoo near the groin.
So what?
OK, one last Canadian musical influence, but this time I’m really leaving because you’ll all try to kill me after this one….and deservedly so.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nMLHPnxkOwA
I’m 5’11”-my 14 year old is 6’2″ and growing. How do I cut him back down to size?
College debt.
It’s not as big a deal up north here. We put a small amount of toonies away every year and things take care of themselves.
You have savings? You bastard.
Yeah, should have adjusted comment. You’ll have to export him.
I mean, who wants their kid to go to a Canadian college?
I just bought my 10 year old shoes a half size larger than mine. Thinking I may have to get Jimmy Hart involved.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=io15h_hMN8I
Did someone say cut?
Redesign all doors in your house to 6′ 1 3/4″.
Antifa Diesel is one of the better surprises today. It’s not too late for him to jackknife Trump. All it’ll cost him is a couple quads.
Burlington Coat Factory’s commercials have improved.
This is my favorite baroque painting.
Norman Rockwell on meth?
No, that would be Broke painting.
So if I was going to vandalize some Campbell’s soup in reflection of the fact that their CEO has declined to withdraw from Trump’s manufacturing council, would people get the message if I just drew a swastika on it? Or am I better off writing out the full “Nazi Soup”?
Every day, when I think I’m weirder than anyone on the planet….
You show up and make me feel better.
Yes, that means what you think it does.
LMFAO.
Sweet Jesus today was a rough day.
I got at most about 3 hours of sleep with that damn test kit. I simply cannot sleep on my back. I kept waking up in agony.
I get to work at seven. I am suppose to be helping some new guys learn about drives. They don’t show up. Now I am tired and pissed.
My boss shows up around 9 am from vacation. Its then I learn that I have customers flying in next week for a week of training. He swears he told me about it. I’m so fucking out of it, I have no idea if he is telling me the truth. We go through the rest of the training schedule for the year and I realize that unless I take vacation like two or three days at a time, at random intervals for the rest of the year, I can’t burn my PTO off fast enough. Boss complains I don’t take time off…in the same conversation where he is telling me that he has scheduled me to give training every other week for the rest of the year.
Fucking new kids roll into my lab around lunch time, expecting me to stop working on the upcoming training and just carry them through the same material I have given them like 2 times prior. One of them tells me that I should have training material already made up and that I shouldn’t need to prep for the next week.
I kick them out of the lab.
Their boss comes down around 2 pm to complain to me that these kids have nothing to do.
“Sounds to me that they have a manager problem”
I get the death stare and then I am left alone. At some point, I passed out at my computer in front of a drive. I woke up like 30 minutes ago and just got home.
Just fucking shit man…this day was shit.
Sincerely sorry to hear all of that man.
FWIW, I can relate….dragging people thru life….it’s tiring.
Hope you’re well otherwise.
Its all good. Could always be worse. I swear to god though, it seems like whenever I get a bout of insomnia or dealing with serious time zone changes, everyone just starts fucking with me.
Again, I can relate. All too well, more than I’d like.
Love you man.
That sounds pretty fucking terrible.
I’ve got to go accomplish writing some shitty shit. But I can’t leave without this one.
My favorite band of all time is Canadian, yes.
Love ya’s.
(shit, now I’ll have to go to the drum kit and further injure myself)
((DAMN YOU SCOTCHY!!!!))
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FAvQSkK8Z8U
Angry Seedpod is angry.
A cherry pick. But not the worst.
The worst is upcoming…..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmwic9kFx2c
Trump is the worst and he’s always looking out for #1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N4_0Pt3HAR8
Super driving tune
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IOrP4JOBEcY
This, I think, needs to lead off every road trip mix:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zf53Pg2AkdY
WHAT DID I JUST TELL YOU ABOUT WHERE TO PUT THE TEXT???
Fucking Canadia, man.
😛
Talk first, then post video. Nothing after.
And he even edited and still fucked it up.
smgdh.
FIXED!!!!!!!
Goddamn, this is beerguyross being NOT creative?
I think I’ll just Sill on out of here after the Super Bowl.
You spelled “slink” wrong.
“Ooh, slinky string! I love that stuff!”
– blaxabbath, clearly suffering from Tebow syndrome.
Only $7.50
Also Canadian? ALSO CANADIAN!!!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAOnUF8t20w
Streetheart’s best tune..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-9h8wtZ0Rg
Give ‘er a listen.
Have often, and will again. As soon as Billy Talent is done rocking the paint off of my walls.
SHUT UP! You know this tune?
I know a lot of things.
Don’t forget….
I’m old.
I’m old. I always forget.
I do as well but…Streetheart? Are you the lead singer’s dad or something? They is way obscure.
LOL. No, but I’m sure most people here think I hit on his mom.
That facemask was so bad Cam Newton got flagged.
*Mwah*
Trouble with the curve goes from an OK waste of time baseball flick to OH MY GOD, WHY IS THERE CHILD RAPE BEING MENTIONED WITH 7 MINUTES LEFT IN THE FILM so fast, it makes no sense. Like did Clint ad-lib that scene and they decided to run with it because he threatened to kill someone if it didn’t make the final cut?
How else you gonna get the Fogle demo?
Hello my Canadian friends.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pz26fcmq3S8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4S3CV9hu6E
Hey there!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEn7TfjxZRw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jmk5frp6-3Q
More doom. But it sounds nice.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=6ilGCduAAWs
Doom you say?
https://youtube.com/watch?v=_qyZQDuUJyk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JZpxaiNV_sM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kVPNc_t16JI
Prism is probably the first three dimensional band to come out of The Canada.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zIAs4Ji1b-w
One of my favorite covers.
Still listen to the original fairly often as well.
And it seems this has become an impromptu Request Line. We all now owe RTD money.
Dammit.
Maybe Trump’s just bored and trying to start a civil war
He could just masturbate ffs.
Seems more like he’s trying to reignite the one we already had.
The right side is missing “Marriage date / baby birth math”
They were really tight for a The Canada band
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JfJUvpLPLrA
That’s what he said.
Fuck you fish. There’s more than 30 times more fish in the world than people, stick to your own kind while i’m stuck here on tinder, I don’t need any more competition
You see because the expression is……..
Ooh I wanna play too!
https://youtube.com/watch?v=wQYue6eZmlU
You started it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mrvkcgU15WI
Oh come on! I did the thing and re-freshed and everything!
Try putting the text of your msg before the link.
I’ve had that happen at times before.
Fixed.
I iz smrt.
Nice. I like you.
That makes one person, at least.
Improvement, ftw.
You did me a good. That means you’re good. Simple as that as far as I’m concerned.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b5Xfch1oERc
Traffic addressed this many years ago. One of the most under-rated solos of all time brought to you by Dave Mason-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cwP9KPQoV5Y
/Sees title
Oh, thank God. It’s not just me.