Your “Crimebeat!’ Is Going To Become A Daily Feature At This Point” Wednesday Evening Open Thread

You can start calling DFO the State Department, because as of this morning we’ve denied over 1900 Russians.

NFL News:

• Both sides in the Ezekiel Elliott suspension have motions before federal court now.
  • It’s all based on who gets to be the court of record:
    • Elliott’s team (and team) are pushing the Texas court to throw out the suspension on the basis of lack of evidence plus improper procedure.
    • The League’s team will push for New York jurisdiction, and plans motions similar to what was argued during the Tom Brady appeal two years ago.
  • He will get to play Sunday, as the appeals are too close to gameday to afford prohibition.
    • In anticipation of the suspension being upheld, the NFL Players Association filed a motion last Friday for a temporary restraining order (TRO). If granted, the TRO would freeze the suspension while Elliott and/or the NFLPA pursue a lawsuit to get the suspension overturned permanently.

• Ray Lewis: Still an asshole.
  • Janay Rice apologises for the language used in the above comment.

• It’s official: Tampa – Miami has been rescheduled for Week-11.
  • Get read for the “no bye-week”, “there were no bye-weeks in the 80s” sprots radio taeks.

• Despite the reports from Dr. Bundchen, the League & union have cleared the Patriots in the “Did TAWMMY have an owwie?” discussion that took place.
  • Whether or not he can catch his own passes? Still a valid query.
  • Lookit that kiss. Aaron Rodgers could give a better performance.

• Von Miller says Trevor Siemian is reminding him of Peyton Manning.
  • Well, he’s probably better than Cooper Manning.
  • That’s damning with faint praise, considering I’m as good as Blake Bortles.

• Michael Bennett says he was racially profiled by the Vegas PD after the MayGregor fight. Deadspin has TMZ’s video:

A police officer ordered me to get on the ground. As I laid on the ground, complying with his commands not to move, he placed his gun near my head and warned me that if I moved he would ‘blow my f—ing head off.’ Terrified and confused by what was taking place, a second Officer came over and forcefully jammed his knee into my back making it difficult for me to breathe. They then cinched the handcuffs on my wrists so tight that my fingers went numb.

I kept asking the Officers, ‘What did I do?’ and reminding them that I had rights they were duty bound to respect. The Officers ignored my pleas and instead told me to shut up and then took me to the back of a nearby police car where I sat for what felt like an eternity until they apparently realized I was not a thug, common criminal or ordinary black man but Michael Bennett a famous professional football player. After confirming my identity, I was ultimately released without any legitimate justification for the Officers’ abusive conduct.

• He is considering a lawsuit.
  • Bennett has retained John Burris, an Oakland-based civil rights attorney, to investigate the incident and determine his legal options.

Finally, as if people needed more reasons to hate either the Patriots and Budweiser, Bud Light is selling 28,300 “Touchdown Glasses” on it’s website, to coincide with the free 65,000 they are giving away at Gillette Stadium on Opening Night.

28,300. GET IT?! Ugh.

The gimmick is that they are aligned with Patriots games, so that it’ll light up whenever nfl.com records a touchdown for the Pats on their scoreboard and the consumer is near a wifi signal. The NHL has had these for years based on goal scoring; the Penguins ones burn out by Christmas, whereas the Canucks ones gather dust.

They will sell for $18 a pop, or you could save your money and punch yourself in the balls for falling for something so craven & #UpForWhatever that Darren Rovell couldn’t find anything to add to the announcement.

As DFO’s resident Patriots fan, Maestro is encouraged to buy one & submit a photo of himself burning a $20 bill.

Tonight’s sports:

• MLB:
  • Royals at Tigers – 7:00PM | FS1
  • Blue Jays at Red Sox – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
  • Diamondbacks at Dodgers – 10:00PM | Sportsnet1
• Basketball:
  • WNBA Playoff:
    • Dallas at Washington (First Round) – 8:00PM | ESPN2
    • Seattle at Phoenix (first round) – 10:00PM | ESPN2
• U.S. Open Tennis:
  • Quarterfinals – 7:00PM | ESPN / TSN

Scotchy’s got you tomorrow night for the first live blog of the season. IT’S BACK, BABY!