The Cowboys/Broncos tilt is far and away the best game available here but I might sneak in some Jets/Raiders action when no one is looking. TO THE GAMES!
Mia/LAC: The Fins finally get a game under their collective belts and I can stuff some Ajayi into my lineup. The Clips lost pg Chris Paul and it showed last week. The good news is that te Blake Griffin was signed in the off-season and continues his stand out play. Did you know that he once played basketball? I’m surprised that announcers haven’t pointed that out very often.
NYJ/Oak: The Jets get to travel all the way out to the west coast to pick up their second L of this young season when they could be doing the very same thing much closer to home and those that pretend to love them. Damn you, NFL schedule-makers! Not going to lie-I’m thinking seriously of taking a year off work and coming back where I left off. I call it “The Lynch Stratagem”.
Dal/Den: Is the Broncs run D improved enough to limit Zeke to under 100 yards? Melvin Gordon and his 3 yards a carry nods knowingly. It seems as though Dez struggles mightily against above average cb’s and that’s where Chris Harris comes in. And don’t kid yourself, the Cowboys D is not nearly as dominant as it seemed against the [spits on ground] Giants O. Denver in a squeaker?
Was/LAR: The biggest surprise last week had to be the way the Rams blew the doors off the Colts. It’s very strange to see a perennial also-ran step on the throat of another team and refuse to let them back up. Goff and Kupp impressed but the jury is still out on rb Gurley, what with that whole 19 carries for 40 yards albatross around his neck.
SF/Sea: The only way the Niners have a puncher’s chance at this one is to feed rb Hyde far more than the measly 15 times they did last week against Carolina. There’s just so much more talent wearing the green and whatever.
Get with the typing, fellas.
My God I love the seams and the visible foul line on the field.
Luuuuuuuuuuuuuuuke Wilson with a gritty hurtle over a defender!
THAT’S the Jets team I expected to see today.
JUST GIVE ME A FUCKING BEEFMOEDOWN
Oh Jets, never change.
I’m not saying the afternoon games are shitty, but, I’m now watching the Future Ice Raiders play the Ice Liouns in an exhibition game.
I’m thinking about doing some work. Actual fucking work!!
On a Sunday?!?! APOSTATE!!!!!!
I will probably talk myself out of it. What’s the career being a little MOAR toilet-immersed?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whNOfvyPpaM
get Gurley within 6 inches and he’s money!
/Favrenis joke
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xfi2ts2s7dc
I could really use a Gurley score
Instead you get this https://twitter.com/StuScottBooyahs/status/909527427600306176
Hell, never mind scoring a gurley, I would appreciate heavy petting at this point.
Well that’s a new way to catch a football
holy shit, that gritty catch!
Sometimes I think Jeff Triplette lives to penalize the Raiders but then I look at the numbers and realize that no, he actually gets PAID to do it.
The Fuck? I rush home and turn on my TeeVee box machine and The Dallas Texas Football Cowboys are in a rain delay?!?! Is this fucking beisbol? Did Bernie win when I wasn’t looking and pussyfy America’s game?
I guess Texas can’t catch a break from the weather even in fucking Colorado.
God has decided to take the Cowboys to primetime.
They don’t want it to get all Tibetan Freedom Festival up in there
Just get some kush from Denver and you won’t be so agitated maaaaan.
/pulls out vibrator
“Tell me more how Bernie caused problems”
–Clinton, H–
I liked this comment, but in reality, I do not like this mental image whatsoever.
I agree, kinda like watching a pothole get repaired.
Dirt Cowboys are up by 3? (And in deep shit with loaded bases … and pants.)
i used to be a big baseball fan, NHRA too. Then I discovered girls.
First wife and I went to a lot of baseball games … … … maybe that’s why we split.
It’s Lazerface vs Smocking Jay, Marmalard vs Typhoid Cutty
“Off the hands of Will Tye”
My Giants fan father just let out an amazing cackle.
Good sons don’t allow their fathers to be Giants fans.
Jeff Triplette hates the Raiders. I wonder what went down?
always assume gambling
Who’s not ded?
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT!!!
Is God done sending lightning bolts to the Denver sodomites?
It is because they legalized the Devil weed. If Moose was here I am sure he would have some random gif of that.
I hope everytime Willie Hayes gets a sack, like he just did, they play the “Wait until we get our Haynes on you” song
“I knew you couldn’t trust that kicker!” – Bill Parcells
oh hell yeah pftc
Teams that start 0-2 only have a small chance of making the playoffs because teams that start 0-2 generally suck. Going 0-2 is predictive because it reflects suckiness, it’s not causal.
Does your rock keep away tigers?
Lisa, I’d like to buy your rock.
12% is remarkably high actually
Yet another reason it’s a stupid subject for commentary
The ’98 Jets gave me so much stupid hope, but that was because Glenn Foley was hot garbage that season.
LOL at how good the Colts made the Rams look last week vs. what they look like against the slurs.
LOLphins losing to a basketball team is pretty sad. They were one of the three games I thought Miami could actually win.
curse of LeBron ,, smgdh
Jets have more TDs than Cincy
So just the one then?
but expressed as a percentage, it’s like INFINITY!
At least I get to watch RamDacted now
SeaTruthers/Tomsulas are always the worst games of the year.
Maybe with all these weather delays affecting football games, politicians might take climate change more serio– I’m sorry, I can’t finish that sentence without laughing.
The weather delays are clearly Jesus’s punishment for Kapernick disrespecting the troops.
This is what the NFL gets for drafting Mike Sam. SMGDH
Honestly, no one takes it that seriously.
You want people to pay attention during every weather delay play a game between the Bears vs the Browns and we will have climate control and population control in two weeks.
I bet the Chargers cant play the Rams in the regular season because neither team would have a visiting crowd willing to buy tickets.
Rams make the Chargers forfeit for not paying rent.
My Dallas/Denver feed was just pre-empted for the RAMMITT game. What?
weather delay
Was there no weather or too much weather?
Glory boy weather (Lightning)
Western Canadia only gets Raiders, and Heaux games in the afternoon.
Jets look competent?
If I had to go up against Marshawn Lynch in high school I’d shit my pants.
R Kelley would pee his.
And Ben McAdoo would film it.
Touchdown, Team That Shall Not Be Named!
lighting never keppt ben franklen off the feild #smdh godbless
Looks like most Raiders tickets start at ~$100, which game should I try to go see after I move? Also, anyone have any seating tips?
[*Redacted] s-Raiders, the hotly anticipated Super Bowl XVIII rematch
Edit: Never mind, that’s in DC
I’d read a dispatch from “The Hole.”
I’ve heard horror stories from people who saw a game there. Don’t go to a night game, and I’ve heard good things about the club seats if you’re willing to pay.
Everytime an announcer says “that’ll be the final play of the quarter” with a few seconds still ticking off the clock i wish the coach would call timeout just to prove them wrong
“Waste a timeout? I’m listening”
–Andy Reid–
“That’s worth a challenge”
-Lovie Smith-
A weather delay? What the fuck?
Joey Gallo just hit a ball that may have just landed at the at the 50 in StubHub Park.
So the Raiders just got penalized for literally tackling.
The Irvin hit? Total bullshit flag.
“Former Seahawk making a tackle for the Raiders, 10-yard penalty and automatic 1st down.”
SWITCH TO RRRRRRAAAMMMMIT MODE!
I guess I will go watch the “Jets game”
What is this, baseball?
Hoping the Seahawks can get a redzone TD is the definition of insanity.
lightning delay in Denver
Aren’t they in a dome? Why a weather delay?
Never mind
Touch…down… Jets?
THE FIFTH SEAL HAS BEEN BROKEN
Tiny Brandon
Real question: Who’s more likely to finish 0-16, J-E-S-T or the Clots?
Humps, because Jets still have Bills at home and Dolphins 2x
Do either of them play the Bears?
Brissette ought to be able to beat the Browns, so J E S T.
Jets, without question. Even the pile of mangled limbs that now comprises Andrew Luck’s body is better than whatever Cronenberg-esque voltron the Jets could form even with all three QBs on the roster playing at the same time.
I think there’s a better than 50% chance Luck doesn’t play a down this year.
I concur with saintlybadger4. They broke Luck.