Latest posts by King Hippo (see all)
- Gravy Boat Ruins Derby Day (Also Whiny Baby German Elton John) – April 7, 2018
- World Gawne Mad – Finale Edition – April 2, 2018
- World Gawne Mad – Final Four Holy Night Edition – March 31, 2018
Yes, my friends, it’s time to rekindle some hatred-based good times from our childhoods. Ain’t that always a hoot? No Euro-Lesser Footy, as they’s on international break, yet again. SIGH.
Michigan State at Ohio State (Noon, Fox)
These teams are right next to one another in the rankings (12/13), but the spread is a mighty -17.5. So Vegas thinks Sparty is gon’ reap some theeeeeee vengeance for being knocked out of the playoffs by the Iowans last week. We shall see.
Oklahoma State at Iowa State (Noon, ABC/ESPN2)
Another tasty matchup, this time with the post-Bedlam mad team on the road. But wait, can’t the Cyclones also be pissed off, having fallen just short in they valiant comeback bid at the Cousinfuckers last week? Or are we just treating them like the roadkill we expect them to turn right back to?
Georgia at Auburn (3:30, CBS)
Finally, a CBS spotlight match that isn’t a turd. Still not sure Aubie has enough offensive weaponry to truly challenge the ‘Dawgs, but this will be a massively holstile environment and a 4-quarter physical battle royale. Good teevee.
Iowa at Wisconsin (3:30, ABC)
I hate recommending two goddamned B1G fixtures the same week, especially when one is this vanilla…but it has its intrigue. Bucky Badger could still have a playoff argument (albeit weak) if it wins out, and Iowa has the last, best chance to stop same before the league championship.
West By God Virginia at Kansas State (3:30, ESPN2)
Wish to God and Sonny Jeebus I saw a gambling angle on this’un, so I’d watch MOAR of it. Both sides are middle of the pack, but give me Wild Man Holgorsen against Undead Bill Snyder any day of the week. This should have been a Friday night matchup or sommet.
Washington State at Utah (5:30, PAC12)
This is the kind of game that Wazzu needs to start winning in order to be taken seriously, on a national basis. Yes, it’s a tough challenge for a team without overwhelming talent…but it needs to get done. If so, would set up a high-stakes Apple Cup.
Alabama at Mississippi State (7:00, ESPN)
If anyone is gonna trip up Roll Damn Tide before the UGA meet and greet (they always take War Damn Eagle 100% serious), it would likely be the Cowbells in Starkville, under the lights. But I wouldn’t bet on it.
Notre Dame at Miami (8:00, ABC)
Here’s your sterling main event. Basically “win and you’re in” the playoffs for the Fucking Dickhole Irish (and I have money on them at -3, think they will win by double digits and hope to have jinxed them). Miami still has to win out, ACC title game v. Clemson included. They won’t.
TCU at Oklahoma (8:00, Fox)
What a fantastic undercard this makes! Not enough is made of how good Bloodeyes are, and they absolutely can go to Norman and win. Especially if Boomer Sooner still gots a sugar high from their 62-52 (not a misprint) Bedlam victory in Stillwater. Okie wants a shootout, TCU wants to grind. Whoever imposes their will will likely get the W, and hopefully (Hippo is shameless Big 12 promoter) a playoff berth. Shit, didn’t mean that to come out so rapey-sounding.
Arizona State at UCLA (9:30, PAC12)
I realize this ain’t much of a tweaker option, but tis all I am left to offer. Good thing the rest of the slate is so badass. Get some sleep for NFL Week 10.