Santa is still slacking off in most ways I see….
Can’t blame him, though. He’s got a big day tomorrow. He deserves a little relaxation today.
But at least he gave us the early gift of not just one, but TWO Saturday Varsity Footy match ups today/tonight.
Earlier today, my Ratbirds shamed/got shamed by the Clots making it that much more likely/less likely for the Dirty Birds to make the playoffs. Add in the fact that I hate the Clots (see the JJ Fozz rule…and fuck the Irsays as usual), tonight I will be in a great/shitty mood.
Why no, this post wasn’t written before that game even began…why do you ask?
–
Minnesota @ Green Bay (+9.0, o/u 41.0)
It’s gonna be cold in Green Bay. Damned cold. A high today of 20°F is expected to drop to single digits by kickoff, possibly even subzero before it’s over. I’ll never complain about winter in the south again. Ah who am I kidding….yes I will. But what’s the o/u on drunk Packers fans taking off their shirts to get on TV during this one I wonder? You know there’s gonna be a few, at least.
On the Frozen Tundra itself, the game might not be what we’d have expected even as recently as last week.
Having lost to Carolina last week, Green Bay’s playoff chances took the proverbial dagger. And thus, Aaron Rodgers has once again been shelved. Brett Hundley hasn’t been the most stellar backup at times, even with Davante Adams cleaning up the mess. But there will be no Davante Adams either in this one because Thomas Davis is an asshole. Defensively Green Bay is, well….Green Bay.
For the Vikings, Keenum to Thielen (and Rudolph and Diggs and McKinnon) has worked pretty well thus far. But some folks think the cold might affect that in this one. And maybe it will, I suppose. But even if it does, I expect Latavius Murray can pick up the slack on the ground enough that Minnesota’s top shelf defense can do the rest.
So again…who wants it more?
Green Bay has nothing to play for but pride, and we’ve seen how well that’s worked out in Rodgers’ absence. Minnesota on the other hand has clinched the division, but still needs the win to inch closer to that first round bye.
Will home field (and the cold) in Green Bay matter? Maybe in the spread, but probably not. And almost definitely not in the final outcome of this one I don’t believe. Minnesota is clearly the superior team on both sides of the ball, and I suspect they take care of business tonight.
Prediction: Vikings 24, Packers 13
Now have at it in the comments!!!!!!
–
hmmmm, it seems “bad QB from UCLA” playing in “feels like 0F” is a recipe for a shitshow.
Be quiet, voice inside my head
This field is so bad RG3 just blew his knee out watching.
Oh please…Pittsburgh AND Washington are blowing their knees (and each other) to play on that field.
Hey, Wounded Knee is about 400 miles thataway (west)!
Besides, RGIII WOULD blow out his knee just WATCHING.
Nice.
Here comes the rush at everyone’s stand. Get em in before it’s done.
Is Arron hang at his “friends” house?
No you’re thinking of James Dungy.
There we go.
His house is literally a stone’s throw from mine AND my Lady’s parents houses. They drive to him.
There were over 40 comments when I got here tonight and I really expected about 10 of them to contain Festivus gifs … there were none … grievance aired.
When you said “over 40 comments” I thought you were talking about the notes Bill Belichick took during his speed dating session.
I’m working, and I’ve made my issues clear. I’m a keep working.
Wrapping gifts with my kid using the same paper and tags I’m going to be using on his own tomorrow. If he doesn’t figure this shit out next year, I’m taking him with me when I buy his gifts and leaving him at the store if it doesn’t come up.
Velma cosplay is an underdiscussed genre
Reindeer sex…..
First Ejection…ALABAMA! WAY TO GO!
SWEET!
Darren Sharper would like to learn more about this paper towel that has “more parole.”
Also, this paper towel that smells like chloroform
GP makes it…triple-ply, extra-absorbent, accepts big-gauge roto-rooters!
Shurmur sounds like it would be the name for one of the dwarves in The Hobbit.
Today feels like a warm up for xmas eve when I really do my good drinking, yet today I have been pretty wasted for a good few hours now.
This is when I retire to wherever the fuck else… “Ankle bracelet 1” from before is the daughter of a high-school sorta crush. *punches dick in perpetuity, says nothing to wife later.*
Could have been worse, could have been a high school ex!
I know that we’re riding the Deregulation Train straight to 2020, but holy fuck, can we stop letting them make pharma commercials where they explain the horrific life-altering side effects of the drugs over happy family outings and general wistfulness?
Don’t worry about it. In a few months they’ll have the right to inject those nasty drugs into your frontal lobe without your permission
That’s the part I like.
suits my dark humour perfect-like
“CAN YOU DIGGS IT?”
-Cyrus, first take
“Isn’t that finished?”
-Boston
Wake me when it’s Teddy time.
Sitrep: only three moms and two dads (all unrelated) that I’ve seen on first pass around. The reason I’ve SEEN them is that they’re stupid. At this point I will allow them a mildly ok Christmas (note to worker). They know me (cuz I’m an asshole when it comes to their kids), next time is jail/revocation…they will sit til Tuesday. I’m THE SHERIFF. Let’s mosey some more!
I’m convinced that if you could get away with just grabbing a kid when you’re working on their junkie parents for the 10th time that the woman would be collecting them like an old cat lady. It was bad enough when we were in the UP, but when we moved down to the population centers, it’s visibly worse. It’s been a fascinating case study watching reality destroy her naivety and faith in humanity. It’s basically what I grew up with, so I never had it. She has one guy she works with who actually did go through the process to adopt a little girl whose mother he treated for an OD, and when she got out of jail, she got court-ordered visitation rights to the child. How much dealing with that fucks him up prevents her from making the move herself, which I know she’s been close to doing in the past.
I haven’t seen an Appalachian defense this strong since that paper about how inter-cousin marriage is sort of ok for a generation or two.
By “paper” I assume you mean some kind of fiddle performance?
Hey, I had nothing to do with this.
I would be happy to see Latavius Murray win a Super Bowl this year because not only do I like him, but it would also mean that the Patriots or Steelers would not win the Super Bowl.
wait a minute, did Al just say “Houston” normally?
Happy Appy went on an ill-timed ganja break there.
Like there’s any such thing.
damn it, I have a moneyline bet, they should be 23 or 27-zip ahead
As a Raiders fan, it’s nice to see another team’s #89 drop a perfectly catchable pass for once.
LOL
Finally realized the Jesus was born during Toyotathon. Cool!
The wise men drove
Pruises?Prius’s?Prius’?4Runners?One flew in a Mitsubishi aeroplane over anorher in an upscale Nissan car; that is, a Zero over Infiniti which is undefined.
GT-R you kidding me?
I know I know, “indeterminate form” is probably the more accurate term instead of “undefined.”
a reverse pass? REALLY??
Who gives a shit? He gets to STOP! HE WINS!
So you guys reccon this Teddy Bridgewater QB gonna get any action?
His GF seems willing.
I would totally pull on that bun during our imaginary sexual encounter.
God help me, it’s weird to see a black fella announce he’s from BYU
I hate those damn 1%’ers!
/hold up-might be getting my signals crossed over here
That’s OK; BYU thinks so too.
“as long as they stick to sportsball and stay away from our pure women”
Anal is OK tho.
or in the ear, don’t forget
Based on the on-the-ground accounts I think they should have that Bahamas Bowl again but call it the Bahamas Bananacakes Bowl and contrive some kind of visa/passport mixup to keep both teams’ punters out of the country.
We’re also officially out of ambulances for the next 30-45 minutes. HAVE AT IT CRIMS!
shhh, don’t give that out for free, sell the info to the crips, son!
I wonder just how soul-crushing it is for a first year paramedic/nurse/ER doctor working their first Christmas season.
that’s when you learn ppl can’t smell vodka on your breath
They live here, it’s high school reunion every week.
Where you at again?
Now? Lambeau Field. East Side GB otherwise.
Urine should freeze soon.
On the other hand, if your liver is in TOTAL FAILURE…who YOU gonna trust? Yeah…we got this.
Two ankle bracelet violations AND a 10 year-old looking to get in…Cuz “mommas in there somewhere?!” Mhm.
Are you allowed to just shoot folk when you reach your bullshit limit? That would be a nice employee retention strategy, methinks.
Sunday Night Football on Saturday, because it’s Christmas Eve Eve
Don’t you think June 20th should be called Summer’s Eve?
I would indeed vote fer this in the Legislature
That is a fresh smelling idea.
Honestly start this bullshit now. I have drunk drugged idjits to watch as I walk.
Alright, time for the Case Keenums to give the Eagles 2 weeks to rest their surviving starters.
Toledo is just buttttt
Hillbillies always find a way to outsmart the flatlander city slickers.
moonshine >> rubber and glass, obvs
Hell Jamie Farr spent ten years in Vietnam just to get away!
/Or something like that.
I decided to start Rapey Jameis over Keenum in DFO ball, no need to risk the weather shenanigans. Minny could run it 50 times between their 2 good backs.
FOAR children ,, ppl forget that
I would very much like to subscribe to her newsletter.
Agreed. There’s something about a hot chick who can also protect me from marauders and bandits.
I’m fragile.
Today we learned that Seamus is a mage.
Hopefully it’s not about realistic-looking violence because oof
Blame the director, stunt coordinator, stunt dude; the kick is there even with that outfit.
Fix it in post. Do something. Even the laughable WWE put together the worst photoshop I’ve ever seen when they made one of Shawn Michaels’ legs a foot longer when he clearly missed a sweet chin music at a PPV.
Oh, that sounds more accurate.
it’s real to me, damn it!!
It’s cold. You THINK you like this, YOU ARE DUMB. Or high i guess. Drunk, likely. Either way…you probably should be sterilized if you think this is awesone.
The crab lice will die.
Rapey Jameis curses under his breath
At least something kills them.
Possible side affect; balls may also actually freeze.
You new here? We got this. Colorado…pshhh.
If you want to kill the crabs; you got to leave the boys out in the wind. Yes, Colorado is always warm everywhere; that’s why people love to ski Loveland..
*Well, in the last few years, yes.
COLD TAEK!!
“I’m so convinced that the Vikings are going to win tonight I’m willing to bet on my second-oldest son’s life! Hold on a sec…”
-Tony Dungy
You’ll need to rope these comments in.
/flagged
Are you just going to leave that comment hanging?
Yes I will, though it’ll be at half-mast-just like James wanted.
So, does Kim Jong Un try some shenanigans at the Winter Olympics, try to cause a foofaraw or a kerfuffle?
I was hoping for a ballyhoo.
Heh.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=LXEKuttVRIo
I’m here, botg. It’s fine for now.
Happy Appy would score like $170 for me with a W. Been a nice Lesser Footy weekend, HAIL GAMBLOR.
I’M GONNA COLD PIZZA THE BANANACAKE OUT OF THIS THREAD!”
/not sure of the meaning of what I just typed
Aw, I miss the Bananacakes Bowl.
Judas Priest AND a bonus Santa hottie pic? Merry Christmas indeed!
I aim to please.