Are you ready? Last Sunday was oh-so-glorious and I’m not sure how it can be topped but the bowels of my being are telling me it will be. Perhaps that’s last night’s chili talking, I’ve no idea. What the heckfire am I waiting for? TO THE GAME!
Jacksonville/New England:
Some football fans down Florida way are talking about The Coughlin Effect transforming this team. “So what is The Coughlin Effect?”, you may ask. Well, as a Giants fan I can tell you it involves not wearing hats in meetings, setting the clocks in the practice facility five minutes ahead and treating any and all injuries with bloodletting-you know, basic crotchety old man stuff. I’ve no doubt that when he was first told that players were kneeling during the anthems his gut reaction was to foam at the mouth.
Injuries:
Tom Brady has some stitches in his paw-paw. Will he play? (yes) Will he wear a glove? (maybe) Will it affect his game? (no) Do I like question marks? (most assuredly)
Stratergizering:
Rumour has it that Adele would like to see Jalen Ramsay on the Gronkster but the Jags D usually covers te’s with a safety (Church/Gipson) or Myles Jack. Besides the fact that Ramsey is out-weighed by a good fifty pounds, what of Brandin Cooks? I can’t see the Jags pulling something special out of their game plan hat today.
Here’s a Problem:
Their names are Hurns, Westbrook, Cole and Lee. That’s not the name of a law firm, that’s the Jags receiving corpse. If the team falls behind by two scores it’s not going to be pretty. That said, I think the speedy Westbrook just might grab a TD on some sort of trickery dickery dock.
Old Adage is old:
War. Won. Trenches. You know how it goes but if Jacksonville’s d-line of Ngakoue, (another strip-sack maybe?) Campbell, Jackson, Dareus and Fowler play as they have been recently the timing that Brady & Co. depend so much upon will be jiggered and they’ll be out of their comfort zone.
Have at ‘er darlings-it’s all yours now.
nice FG.
LAMBO KICK GOOD!
whew
Josh Lambo, Quotables Hall of Famer.
Redemption.
4nette brought down by his own linemen
Oh my god
What is this business?
Rub some aerosol cheese on it and get back in there!
I get it, Jaguras. Running on first down has been the strategy. But you don’t need to run on EVERY first down.
Hey! Are YOU leading in this game?!
Hey man, they threw a screen pass once. I don’t know what more you want.
“Blake Bortles is playing the game of the year!” …against a very poorly rated defense.
Keep giving it to muthafuckin Yeldon, just like last week.
and neo-tiny darren, like the 1st half
/takes deep breath
IS BORTLES ELITE?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!??!
I, for one, have never doubted the skills of Beck Bottle
Blart Beckinsale is a gamer. He knows how to win.
Boobings Buxomton is a generation talent.
You mean Brad Bartles?
He’s one of the two best quarterbacks playing right now.
BORT is keeping his head in the game better than Dreamboat. NOBODY DENIES THIS
Better than Gronk anyways.
BORST DOWN
“That check down pass….wow. This is Bortles game of the year!”
[nods]
– joe flacco
Dinked and dunked to death
I hope they bust out some Wildcat.
Yeldon! there is fight in these Jags
Nothing wrong with Yeldon.
young yeldonfirst
way to do a thing, BORT/Yeldon!
Yikes, this playcalling.
Pats just got flattened.
#UnleashTehWhitey
– S. Carolina
So I got I’m very bad shape in ‘17. As the Mrs is now pregnant, a friend of hers goes to this Crossfit gym and they have a trainer gal whose like specialty is training knocked up gals. Long story short, I went the last two mornings and now my legs are shot to shit so I’m going to get high.
THAT JUSTIFICATION ENOUGH FOR MY DRUG USE, HIPPO?!
survey sezzzzz…
chuh chuh
I love Dawkins so much
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rdaBaDEivl8
gritfirst
The one true T-BO
‘Which no one disputes…” *raises hand*
Everyone tells me in theory that there is no dispute!
How many fingers Rob?
Vodka tonic, tires, lightbulb?
HE’S GOOD!
Realistically, how do you even evaluate Gronk for a concussion?
Doctor: “What number comes between 68 and 70?”
Gronk: “69!”
Doctor: “My favorite type of boat is…”
Gronk: “PARTY BOAT”
Rave music intensifies
Doctor: “He’s clear”
Regrettably, I’m at work. Were the unnecessary roughness & PI calls legit on the pats’ TD drive (he asked, expecting the answer “no”)?
UR=yes, PI=no.
Yeah. Bouye had Cooks well and pinned to the sideline, cut off his route. Looks like Cook tried to drive back through Bouye into the field, Bouye had none of it, and was flagged for not just giving ground.
Every time I see Greg Olson I just think… FUCK YOU MIKE MARTZ!
HOW WAS THIS PI https://twitter.com/pff_sam/status/955188757753421824
fuck off, simmons
https://twitter.com/BLeez17/status/955189283308146688
I didn’t know that guy was still around.
Then again, I’m not in the northeast where the only influences allowed are loudest pricks in the biggest cities accessible by Amtrak.
yep, no longer hiding it
https://twitter.com/bfretyy/status/955190209754251264
#releasethememos
Centurylink: You know better than to trust us but you can trust us!
*Advertised speeds may not be available in any area
“Suckers. I left my brain in the glove compartment of my tree house before the game.”
-Gronk
toyota camrys will never see over 60 mph
Judging by them thighs, they ain’t starving on that island.
OK, time to get hammered so I can come up with creative cussing in the 2nd half when the officials rips the Jags’ hearts out.
Seems corporate told Nance and Romo to work the shaft and balls a little more for TB and his merry band of assholes…
They’re not even going to try with 2 timeouts? Idiots.
The Refs are in full Pats mode. Best to go to Halftime and let the refs calm down.
Posted earlier this week
http://media.advance.net/nj-lvl_eagles_syndication/photo/2018/01/19/SB%20ad%20NFL.png
FUCKING KNEEL DOWN WITH 60 SECONDS TO GO!?
Refs are just looking for an excuse to put that ball in Brady’s hands with fifteen timeouts.
Well there’s the confidence in Bortles!
The refs are heard from. Disgraceful PI.
this is WEAK
Things are coming along nicely at the Linc.
http://www.nj.com/eagles/index.ssf/2018/01/photos_riot_police_on_horses_storm_parking_lots_be.html#incart_river_home
Pat’s vs Geno’s
Absolutely no one talking to Phil Simms on the half-time set.
There’s a shock
2018 and we’re still doing Lil’ Sweet…
You can cut the sexual tension between Clay and Aaron with a knife
That PI was call was bullshit. Since the receiver ran out of bounds, he cannot be the first person to catch the ball or its a penalty.
At the point he runs out of bounds, PI can no longer be called in that situation.
Oh yeah?! RELEASE THE MEMO!`o
Gronk will just go back to the dressing room and crush some Tide Pods.