NFL News:
- So, the market cap is now set at 5 years, $137 million, with $74 million guaranteed.
- I don’t know who they’re going to have in front of him, though.
- Meanwhile, Tom Brady is turning 41, and his backup is Brian Hoyer.
- Maybe they can turn that second-round pick into something tangible.
- But at least they’ve got former Colts head coach Josh McDaniels back as OC in New England.
- On that front, the Colts are looking to interview Leslie Frazier for their HC vacancy.
- He spent two years as an assistant with Tony Dungy on the Colts staff, so he has an Indy pedigree.
- It seems like more than a Rooney Rule interview.
- He spent two years as an assistant with Tony Dungy on the Colts staff, so he has an Indy pedigree.
- Now the [Redacteds] are blaming Kirk Cousins for them trading for/signing Alex Smith.
- They claim “mixed messages”, because they couldn’t understand what he meant by “pay me or trade me”.
- Robert Kraft is probably a little miffed that Bill Belichick didn’t fill him in on the Malcolm Butler plan for The Big Game™®©
- “Coach always gives me a pretty good overview before the game,” Kraft told CNBC the Friday before the Super Bowl.
- This article’s thoughts on why Butler was sat date back to Super Bowl XXV, when Belichick was the Giants DC against the Bills.
- He let Thurman Thomas run all over the Giants, in order to keep Kelly from throwing the ball.
- Thinking is, he wanted the Eagles to be similarly lulled to sleep by keeping Butler on the sidelines.
Finally, because God hates us all for revelling in Patriots schadenfreude, si.com asked Tim Tebow about playing in the XFL.
- Never mind he is still trying to become a NY Met.
- I’m reproducing it here so you don’t reward such media buffonery with extra page clicks:
SI.com: When Vince McMahon announced the return of the XFL, everyone on Twitter wanted you and Johnny Manziel in the league. Were you aware of that?
Tebow: I’ve had a lot of people ask me about it, but I didn’t know those were the two things on Twitter. I can’t say I follow it that closely.
SI.com: On his conference call, McMahon said you’d be welcome in the league. Have you thought about seeing what happens when that league launches?
Tebow: That’s very nice of him, but 2020 is a long way from now. I’m focused on today, I’m focused on spring training and a lot of things before that. I’m not even close to thinking about that right now.
SI.com: So that’s not a “no” or a “yes.”
Tebow: What if it’s a “I have no idea?” That’s in 2020 and I’m super excited about baseball.
Jason Kelce had the best time at the Eagles parade.
Something tells me he can crowdsource the fine. Stone Cold should chip in based on the bump in merch sales.
Tonight’s sports:
- Olympics: times are best-guesses because coverage is blocked into groupings
- TSN’s coverage starts at 6:30PM
- CBC’s coverage starts at 7:00PM
- NBC & NBCSN’s coverage starts at 8:00PM
- Events:
- Mixed Doubles Curling:
- Canada vs. China – 7:00PM | TSN
- USA vs. Switzerland – 8:00PM | NBCSN
- Figure Skating – 8:00PM | NBC / CBC
- Luge: – 9:00PM | NBCSN / TSN
- Skiing: Moguls
- Mixed Doubles Curling:
- Opening ceremony – 6:00AM | CBC / NBC
-
NHL:
- Canucks at Lightning – 7:30PM | Sportsnet
- Vegas at Sharks – 10:30PM | Sportsnet
- NBA:
- Knicks at Raptors – 7:30PM | Sportsnet1
- Celtics at Wizards – 8:00PM | TNT
- Thunder at Lakers – 10:30PM | TNT / Sportsnet1
- Mavs at Warriors – 10:30PM | TSN2
- NCAA:
- Georgia Tech at Louisville – 7:00PM | ESPN2
- Duke at *North Carolina – 8:00PM | ESPN
- Stanford at Utah – 8:00PM | FS1
- SMU at Houston – 9:00PM | ESPN2
- UCLA at Arizona – 10:00PM | ESPN
- Washington at Oregon – 10:00PM | FS1
Seamus has you tomorrow for (hopefully) a sexy Olympic Open Thread, and I’ll be dropping the weekend posts in there somewhere. ‘NIGHT ALL!
sharks score!
now its 2-2
I found a funny:
Mission Control: prepare to enter the vacuum of space
Dog Astronaut: wait the what now
Update on my weird youtube glitches…
I thought maybe it was just a firefox issue. It’s not. I disabled all plug ins/add ons. Same thing. Same thing also is happening in every browser, even new ones I just downloaded just to check/troubleshoot.
This is really weird. Oh well, I’ll figure it out tomorrow. I gotta get to writing if you guys want sexy tomorrow.
Sexy? I gotcha fam.
I’ll belay resupplying the spank bank for a week in the name of PATROITSM. I’ve probably got most of whatever you have in store, anyway.
That, Sir, is a very interesting point. Perhaps…and hear me out here…perhaps YOU should be the one to guest write it? I for one would love to read that.
Or at the very least supply me with a selection of your favs so I don’t fuck it up?
Seriously. Consider the guest writing. Even co-writing it would be cool. Think on it.
The horse-poop eater is getting a SB ring, right?
It’s Philadelphia, he’s getting a statue.
Shit.
Vegas has 2 goals on just 5 shots on goal.
That’s ungood for the GAA.
Apparently this Vegas team is really good! been getting wins and now are in first in the western conference!
https://www.nhl.com/standings/2017/conference
So I’ve heard.
Heh. Ufford called Kelce “Monster Energy Genie”
A fun picture about our country….
Louisiana’s refineries still haven’t recovered from Katrina?
“Aircraft” – why the DOD budget is $700 billion.
Alaska?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U1iCZpFMYd0&ab_channel=jasefest
I knew what that was before I clicked on it. I love that clip.
hahahaha thats a good one!
LOBSTERS AND CIGARETTES!
I saw I, Tonya again while I waited to get my phone battery replaced. I also caught the very end of Lady Bird and cried again.
Anyway, at least Tonya gave as good as she got. I haven’t seen that many nut shots in one movie since the I watched the Jackass movie.
Is posterizing still a thing?
Still not even the worst thing to happen that game.
You have to respect someone that goes flying balls first at highway speed down an icy slide of doom for glory.
Balls first. Like … Naked?
I just lost all respect for Gillian Anderson.
Damn.
There’s a PETA billboard where Alicia Silverstone is bitching about wool. Because apparently shearing sheep is now a crime against nature.
Anyway, celebrities are idiots. They’re never worth respecting.
Billboard by my building.*
*As if you care.
Good news guys!
I finished up my first book of the year!
Its called Capitalism without Capital: The Rise of The Intangible Economy
https://press.princeton.edu/titles/11086.html
Really dry, economic analysis but overall it was interesting!
I’ll wait until Michael Bay makes the movie.
I’m reading a book on the Whiskey Rebellion. Alexander Hamilton was an asshole.
Spoiler Alert?!?!
Seriously, can someone drag Rand Paul off the Senate Floor? He’s not even filibustering!
Can we then drag him behind a truck after?
Hi, FBI! We’re just joking!
As far as you know.
Is his neighbor out on bond?
Potential curling injuries? INTRIGUE!
Frostbite?
Sweepers’ Elbow?
Tripped over a stone and fell on the ice.
Cirrhosis?
Anybody else having a glitch with youtube tonight?
Can’t tell if it’s just me or not.
It’s you
It usually for most things so that was my presumption as well.
I can load vids I’ve got bookmarked. But searches are a no go and clicking on different links on the little side thingy are a no go.
Weird.
Just go to pornhub.
Later.
I just searched for seamus and got this. Seems right.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMBPYsMugg4
I’m truly LMFAO’ing right now. That’s awesome.
Additional info…if I right click and tell it to open in new tab from the links on the side thingy, that works.
I think my computer is fucked up again. Goddammit.
Let me guess. Packard Bell?
Do they still make those?
Evening folks!
Sharks vs Golden Kinghts BIG GAME!!!!!!
Yo Dawg!!!!
Why do that to their knees? This is painful to watch.
I’m more worried about her elbows!
Wait…I’ll bet I’m watching something different.
Wait a minute…(turns around)…ROMONOBYL!!! GET OUT!!! DID YOU NOT NOTICE THE TIE ON THE DOOR KNOB?!
I thought the signal was a wire hangar!
No! Wire Hanger’s a solo act. Tie is a group ensemble.
YOU’VE GOT TWO MONITORS NOW??
If you want any proof that the pac-12 deserves 0 tournament teams this year, just watch UA/UCLA. This is two bad teams wearing uniforms that, in practically any other year, at least one would be worn by a Sweet Sixteen squad.
And ASU still manages to be in the bottom quarter of conference, even this year.
So how many of you would be willing to give the luge a try, and how much alcohol would be required before strapping on the sled?
I’d have to die from alcohol poisoning before you got me up there.
Getting up there is easy, it’s the getting down part where things can become a little dicey.
Not really. Once you get started, gravity and low drag coefficient pretty much takes over.
How could that end badly?!
-Nodar Kumaritashvili
/crippling fear of heights
Yes please. No alcohol required.
I’d try it, but I’d prefer not to be drunk while doing so.
Maybe a little high, though.
I did the alpine slide once, which was lower-speed luge but with wheels. So none, it’s actually one of the sports I’d want to try! Ski jumping would be another one, but I’d end up killing myself.
Skeleton on the other hand, different story. Okay, I’d probably still try it.
Wide World of Sports killed ski jumping for me.
He’s the greatest ski jumper of all time
No alcohol. But money would have to be required. Nothing outrageous. Just something for me to retire on or at least have my family have fun after my funeral.
I sure would love to party with Tara and Johnny someday.
http://editorialcartoonists.com/cartoons/VarveG/2018/VarveG20180208_low.jpg
If for some reason you weren’t already maxed out on Duke hate, may I remind you that Stephen Miller went there.
As did Nixon.
No wonder he hated the upper-class.
The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance.
The local news is 10 minutes into their newscast and have talked about nothing but the Duke/U*NC game so far. They just ran Roy Williams’ post game presser live (I shit you not). But the funniest part is that when they went back to the anchors, the dumb girl turned to the dumb guy and said words to the effect of….
“Roy seems pretty happy. I don’t know if his players will have to go to class tomorrow!!!”
Yeah, Honey. “Tomorrow”.
Yes, I’m still giggling.
Me: “I can’t imagine any situation where I’d side with the President.”
Omarosa: “I hated working in the White House. I hate Trump.”
Me (looks up to Heaven): “Nice one, God.”
So Spirit Airlines told a 21 year old woman she couldn’t take her support hamster on the plane, so she flushed it down the Ladies Room shitter.
I stopped at “support hamster”.
– Richard Gere
That was a gerbil. Git yer urban legends straight ya rookie!
It was too good of a joke for your to murder.
True, but I’m a dick like that. Ask anybody!
*Your
So let me get this straight. For the first time in while, we had both political parties, both bicamerals and the President all agree on something and it doesn’t work and we’re shutting down the government.
WHAT IN THE HELL?!
Basically a penis measuring contest at a global scale.
It’s kinda funny hearing all the hype leading up to this Duke/U*NC game, and being able to remind everyone involved (most of whom didn’t attend either school) that we lowly wolven sort kicked both dey asses already this year.
Fun week.
I don’t care about the teams one way or the other, but find it interesting that they are 50-50 and are two points difference or some shit.
*heard it on the radio; must be true.
It used to annoy me to be honest. Mostly because the idiots who talk the most shit never attended either school (or any school for that matter…including HS probably). I have some of them in my own family, frankly.
But then I discovered the magic phrase about a decade ago…
I wear an NC State shirt because I went to NC State.
You wear a Duke/U*NC shirt because you went to Walmart.
It’s funny how much that irritates people when it’s true.
It is pretty amazing that is the case after 100 games and that fans of either team seem to think that one school is completely dominant.
U*NC-Dook is the All Takes Matter of rivalries.
TO THE RESCUE!!!
Nice to have the SUPPORT of your friends.
h
ttps://78.media.tumblr.com/588469a524eda1b0025a23805cc5ca63/tumblr_opvxnyDVNn1umk4ogo1_400.gif
Gilligan’s Island S:2 EP:4 – The Professor Finally Gets Some.
Big ass, like 10 feet of ass, but extremely well proportioned.
That’s the episode where the Skipper rapes everybody, and then rapes the Professor twice. Rarely shown since its original air date.
That show premiered right after the JFK assassination so it was preempted. Ppl forget that.
Not sure what you were watching or drinking; the Skipper was watching Ginger and Mary Anne go at it through his favorite Hut Hole (TM). He is a watcher, not a raper.
How do I apply for that job?
/updates resume
I must have missed that booth on career day.
Can someone explain to me why there are Olympic events before the opening ceremonies?
That’s some kind of smarty pants reference about whether I’m sober enough to type straight, isn’t it????
It’s not not about that.
Hehe, fair enough.
In all honesty, tomorrow was going to be your request. But that was before I realized how excited everyone would be over the Olympics. I kinda figured everyone would be meh re: Olympics so it was gonna be a tangential mention. But apparently I miscalculated on that.
So I’m bumping you back a week. Go sit in the green room and pout until next week I guess?
(Seriously, I don’t want your week to get overshadowed, that’s the real reason.)
THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!!
Dead Heat?
Vikings pick up Eagles’ QB coach for OC. Time will tell if they actually have a QB under contract next year.
Vikes will trade for Cousins by offering a seventh-round pick and a Snickers bar. Dan Snyder will call it the greatest trade in league history.
It depends, how big of a Snickers bar are we talking?
Half-eaten Fun Size
That reminds me of a girl I used to date.
That was the exact answer we were looking for, actually.
ok, rage bet an extra $250 on Wiscy ML (+175) @ILL, the Illini ought not be getting points against nobody.
No action for moi this evening.
https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js
a beautiful display of two teams without the first clue as to what “defense” might be
Just saw the Clemson-Shitt score. You deserve to lose; never, ever trust the Panthers in anything.
I just couldn’t see Son of Clem covering 18 in hoopsball. They almost gave it up in garbage time.
Lost in all that good, good chaos is how close we were to Bill Belichik not giving a fuck and actively reviling Patriots’ fans for enjoying one thing a year
Olympics coverage of men’s figure skating is on. I’d love to watch Johnny Weir try to change a flat tire.
It is important to appreciate that Jason Kelce was killing it long before the speech
He is truly awesome
I truly have no idea what curling is about.
Basically bocce ball on ice after drinking a lot of Molson’s.
This article’s headline might has well read, “Scotchnaut commits Seppukku”
https://sports.yahoo.com/alex-burrows-suspended-10-games-012800868.html
That just puts the bullet in the head to end the Sens’ suffering this season.
We would have also allowed “Maestro commits seppuku.” He’s had a rough week.
So, question for the IT people here:
Do any of you have experience with Supermicro servers? If so, how the fuck do you factory reset one?
Is that like a micropenis? Because if so, ask someone else.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kLGsuXzUfuM
I’m your huckleberry.
But more specifically, what are you trying to accomplish?
Work was gonna scrap 2 servers. So they gave them to me. I only know the IP of one of the 2, and even then I can’t get in to it. So I want to factory reset to get rid of the configuration
We have one at work, but I haven’t had to deal with it much. Did you try the default un: admin pw: admin login? You will be shocked and appalled at how often that works anywhere in the world. Looks like the actual command is just ipmicfg -fd. This guy’s got a write up on the whole process using a DOS LiveCD to reset the password to start. https://www.servethehome.com/reset-supermicro-ipmi-password-default-lost-login/
I’ll give it a shot! Much appreciated
Jason Kelce is going to be mayor.
[borrowed from Unsurprised]
EAGLES FAN: [hefting an unopened beer] My god, it’s like throwing thirty batteries at once!
Lee-esque
So I heard that the Trump Administration is starting a new public transportation initiative and they’re putting Hope Hicks in charge. Early reports are that it’s a rideshare program called the Village Bicycle.
Hey, don’t slut-shame that, um, slut I guess.
Assuming she’ll hook up with Stephen Miller next.
[blinks with his bottom eyelids, resumes sharpening meathook]
– Stephen Miller
The least fuckable McPoyle. Including the dead ones.
Comic movie fans are fucked in the head. Black Panther gets one bad review, and lots of people are losing their shit. Uh, ok.
WHO DARED BESMIRCH THE PANTHER?!
I don’t enjoy watching the knob-slobbering Blues fixture (though for the first time in decades, I will actively cheer for Duke instead of JUST earthquake).
GAMBLOR on Duke, Utah (ML), Washington (ML), GT (ATS +10.5), and Pitt (+18)
I like your two Pac-12 plays (so RUN AWAY obvs)
I don’t watch pro wrestling anymore but whatever Rand Paul is doing now — rediscovering (it’s all an act, I know) his libertarian roots right when a massive funding bill is up against a shutdown deadline — I’m waiting for him to throw on a McCoy jersey and powerbomb Mitch McConnell through a table.
Except from a powerbombing standpoint, Rand Paul is a bottom (as certain neighbors can attest).
Hey, guys, I finally watched the AFLW games from this past weekend, how did we all do in the tipping pool?
https://www.doorfliesopen.com/2018/02/05/balls-of-steels-afl-beat-2018-aflw-round-1/
Oh.
Very nicely done!
Vince does realize that based on his own rules, Manziel can’t play in his lea–nevermind.