INT. DFO PRODUCTION OFFICE – DAY.
A pair of sleazy Hollywood producers are deep in conversation with an NFL tight end.
RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY: …and I’ll be honest, this is a much better offer than you’ll get from, say, Old School Zero over at Sony.
DARKEST TIMELINE ZACK MORRIS: Ha ha ha! They can’t even afford decent antivirus software!
ROB GRONKOWSKI: I get that, I do, it’s just that I don’t want to make too much of a commitment. Gotta keep my options open, you know? [takes a final sip of his beverage, holds up and twiddles the empty can]
RTD: [punches intercom button] Traycee, another round for Mr. Gronkowski, please?
TRAYCEE: [via intercom] Sure thing Mr. Deadly.
GRONK: I really should talk to Drew about this.
DTZM: Your agent?
RTD: Listen, Drew Rosenhaus is one of the best agents out there.
DTZM: Maybe the best.
RTD: But he does sports.
DTZM: This is Hollywood, Rob.
TRAYCEE appears and discreetly sets a can on a coaster in front of GRONK, then silently withdraws.
RTD: You need representation here that knows this industry.
DTZM: Insiders.
RTD: Guys who can advance your career.
DTZM: Introduce you to the right people.
RTD: Get you the right opportunities.
DTZM: Maybe you’ve heard of a character called…Chunk?
RTD: He means Sloth. You’ve seen Goonies?
GRONK: Ugh. Yes. Eli insisted on watching it at his birthday sleepover. Twice.
DTZM: [points to a framed photo on the wall]
DTZM: That’s John Matuszak. The Tooz. He was a lot like you, actually.
GRONK: You guys represented him?
RTD: Our fathers did. Our families have been representing people in this town for a long time.
GRONK: I thought you guys were producers.
DTZM: We do lots of things!
RTD: You know what, let’s check with Drew, let him tell you himself. [punches intercom button] Traycee, can you get Drew Rosenhaus on the phone.
TRAYCEE: [via intercom] Sure thing Mr. Deadly.
RTD: [winks at DTZM]
DTZM: [pushes a stack of paper over to GRONK] Here, take a look at the contract. It’s pretty standard.
GRONK: [poring over the documents] Forty percent? Drew only takes ten.
RTD: It’s different here in Hollywood.
DTZM: That’s actually a very reasonable rate for this town.
RTD: Listen, the bigger our cut, the harder you know we’ll work at finding you the best parts. The most lucrative parts.
DTZM: That’s just simple math.
GRONK: Yeah, but…
TRAYCEE: [via intercom] I’m sorry, Mr. Deadly?
RTD: Were you able to get a hold of Mr. Rosenhaus?
TRAYCEE: It appears that he’s too busy to talk about this right now.
DTZM: Well that’s a shame.
RTD: You see, Rob, that wouldn’t happen with us.
DTZM: Our clients are important to us.
RTD: And you’d be our biggest one.
DTZM: Physically.
RTD: If you sign on with us, we can have you out for an audition with Neill Blomkamp today. He’s casting space marines for a Warhammer 40k script he optioned.
DTZM: You interested?
GRONK: I…
RTD: Of course he’s interested! We’re talking Warhammer!
GRONK: That does sound appealing.
DTZM: Besides, if you’re not happy, you can always drop us.
RTD: [mutters something under his breath that sounds like fine print legalese]
DTZM: This is Hollywood, after all! The movie industry wasn’t founded on long-term commitments, if you know what I mean.
GRONK: [knocks back the rest of his Bud Light] You know what? Let’s do it.
DTZM: Great, great!
The three of them ink their signatures on the contract.
DTZM: Well, this calls for a celebration! Another Bud Light?
GRONK: Can’t do it, I gotta hit the road. I’m supposed to be hosting this radio show thing. They told me to think of a theme – you guys got any suggestions?
RTD: Movies!
DTZM: Yeah, movies.
GRONK: [shrugs agreeably] All right, you’re the bosses.
RTD: [smiles]
DTZM: That’s right. We are now.
—
As you must have figured out by now, today’s topic is songs about movies/filmmaking. Not songs from movies – we’ll do a favorite soundtrack songs edition sometime in the future. Post your youtube links in the comments (no embed codes or anything needed, just the links). I’ll get us started with a song that means a lot to me – if I’d had a traditional wedding this is what I’d have used for our first dance.
I took a first year film course so I’m immensely qualified to post this.
“Look at you back on the set.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQ4Jcyucj2w
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DxtmQDCyLE8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8cIQDpHdS-U
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RSyc2uvUCiE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZvReiFqtWiQ
Duh, can’t believe I forgot this one. Maybe it’s for the best, though, cause now it’s a DOUBLE SHOT.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hIppppVvLU
As a good friend once told me “I should never be filmed having sex,” when listening to this song.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VbOwjRfUUq4
Haven’t listened to this band in quite some time.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtyM40cHsqQ
Hell, this should count, right?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zYKcJEeV3Mo
More about “celebrity” than “cinema”, but the line “Wilted and faded somewhere in
Hollywood” gets it a nod.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3dWBLoU–E
If this has already been posted, my apologies.
If it hasn’t, we should all be ashamed….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yk27lbGNwes
Close enough…
“This life is more than just a read through”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BfOdWSiyWoc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JgGwxO8bQ4M
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsiy1H5tIoM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EIkdr64_cCo
Hot taek: This song, not “Closing Time” should have been Semisonic’s big hit.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vV59m3beMYA
This song is apparently about River Phoenix.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FUM-EQtn2Iw
Nice love song about imprisoning and skinning a loved one.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nS928TJqbxY
If you guys don’t like this, you’re not worthy of the jizz on this pizza.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ttVaQ-qnm98
DOUBLE SHOT, just cuz I love everyone.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x8LAjRx-d9w
[immediately tries to look inconspicuous]
– Andy Reid
I just went over all entries.
Tut tut.
King Missile – Martin Scorsese
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BVeGmfcHkS4
King Tut.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wgTPH5y1-ZI
“This one goes out to you, Old School Zero!”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KYaH-Z2VN9M
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YlUKcNNmywk