NFL News:
- The Bill Simmons Media Group has lost its president due to sexual harassment claims.
- Eric Weinberger, a former executive at NFL Network, has been accused of sending “several nude pictures of himself and sexually explicit texts” to Jami Cantor, who is currently suing the Network.
- It’s unclear if this is the same lawsuit that also brought down Donovan McNabb and Eric Davis.
- At this point, it’s got to be pretty well understood in the 21st Century that saying – out loud – that a woman was “put on earth to pleasure me,” is not going to sound the way you meant it when said out loud in a court room
- Then ‘allegedly’ pressing a crotch against a woman’s shoulder and asking her to touch it just guarantees a future legal defeat.
- In conclusion:
- Eric Weinberger, a former executive at NFL Network, has been accused of sending “several nude pictures of himself and sexually explicit texts” to Jami Cantor, who is currently suing the Network.
- In other news, the Bill Simmons Group has leadership that goes beyond Bill Simmons simply yelling “I NEED 10,000 WORDS ON HOW GOODELL’S FUCKING THE PATS AGAIN!”
- Marshawn Lynch reworked his contract to help the Raiders & new teammate Doug Martin.
- It lowered Lynch’s base salary against the cap, but gave him more guaranteed money on the season.
- It also hopefully gets us closer to the long-anticipated DFO spinoff serial “All About That Action”, starring Beastmode & The Muscle Hamster.
- Apparently, the Colts tried to trade into the #1 overall pick, but the Browns weren’t interested.
- The sticking point appears to be the Jets being unwilling to part with a future first-round pick, which actually makes sense on both sides.
- The Browns absolutely should demand it, given their current prime location.
- The Jets absolutely should keep all their #1s because they will need them.
- The sticking point appears to be the Jets being unwilling to part with a future first-round pick, which actually makes sense on both sides.
Finally, get those medical cards out if you’re going to San Diego, because you can now get your medicine courtesy of “Real Wellness by Ricky Williams”.
Quoting from NBC7 in San Diego,
- RW has six cannabis-based wellness products derived from Williams’ own formulations that can be incorporated into daily health routines.
- “It’s a dream come true for me to merge my passion for healing and my fascination with plant medicines with my entrepreneurial spirit. Cannabis has played an important part in my healing journey, and I feel a responsibility to share what I have learned in the process,” said Williams, RW’s founder and brand leader.
- RW’s product line is available at 11 dispensaries in San Diego.
- RW has six cannabis-based wellness products derived from Williams’ own formulations that can be incorporated into daily health routines.
Tonight’s sports:
- NHL:
- Habs at Penguins – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
- Bruins at Blues – 8:00PM | NBCSN
- Ducks at Flames – 9:30PM | Sportsnet360
- NBA:
- Raptors at Cavaliers – 7:00PM | ESPN / Sportsnet1
- Wizards at Spurs – 9:30PM | ESPN / Sportsnet1
- NCAA:
- NIT Basketball Tournament:
- OK State vs. Western Kentucky – 7:00PM | ESPN2
- St. Mary’s vs. Utah – 9:00PM | ESPN2
- NIT Basketball Tournament:
That’s it for me this week. Hippo’s got you covered for all your bracket/GAMBLOR related viewing until Sunday night. CAN YOU BET ON IF THE LOYOLA NUN DIES?
Oh, hey. Speaking of disgusting snacks, Trader Joe’s sells a milk chocolate Cinnamon Toast Crunch bar. I’m not paying two bucks to see if it’s any good though.
‘Member back in the old days when the “History” Channel actually had history on it? ‘Member?
So… a plow?
Pedo-plow……
that doesn’t sound quite right. Pede-plow.
Plowdestrian?
Are you saying picking from the garages of Nazi Swamp Aliens isn’t history?
Plenty of good real stories……
Flying Monkeys needed charging up between scenes.
“We don’t need no stinking’ exhaust ducts!”
No wonder my grandfather died young.
I hope that thing floats
The first known photograph of someone giving the middle finger – baseball pitcher Charles “Old Hoss” Radbourn of the Boston Beaneaters flipping off the photographer in a team photo, 1886.
Never forget our heroes.
I have no idea what you’re referring to.
WWI psych-ops were weird. Just hope to hit the brown note, and everyone would run away after crapping themselves.
Just in case you were curious (THIS DOES NOT RUIN THE JOKE!):
Three Japanese acoustic locators 1930; Three Japanese acoustic locators, colloquially known as “war tubas,” mounted on four-wheel carriages, being inspected by Japanese Emperor Shōwa.
It’s clearly worked. There’s no military operation against the Kaiju that doesn’t start with, “WWWWWOOOOMMMPPPPP WWWOOOOOOOOOMMMMPPPPPP.”
The Chinese were using the “war sad trombones” and we know what happened in Nanking………
During the 1930’s the British built several types of experimental acoustic locators, as they had been victims of aerial night bombardments by zeppelins during the First World War and were looking for ways to detect aircraft engines at a distance. While also working on an electric “death ray” they discovered that it didn’t kill anything, but the death rays reflected back from distant objects which could be ranged and detected. This is how radar was developed.
You can add the joke later.
The High Jump, The Olympic Games. London. 1908.
“Death Ray” is always funny
What a shit head.
SPACE BOOB, ENHANCE
-ISS Plastic Surgeon
Lighten up, Francis.
OOK OOK
Speaking of Blizzards, I don’t care what DQ says – this looks like a teenager on his last day working wants to get fired for pooping in my ice cream.
Shoulda done it AFTER it was out of the mixer……
Living on a busy street, there’s something eerie about the silence of a blizzard. It gets even more eerie when I go about four houses down and there is complete and utter muted silence.
I quite enjoy walking the dogs at midnight during a blizzard. It’s bright enough and quiet enough that I almost find peace.
I’m OK!!!!!!
.
Candygram for Mongo?
“Mongo just domino in game of life.”
-Bluto
Thought about picking up Jake Guentzal up off the waivers tonight because I had a hunch. I decided I couldn’t risk it and of course he breaks out of his slump with 3 points tonight.
Nothing worse than having a hunch about a guy and then being right, but not acting accordingly.
I’m OK!!!!!!
The best is still the founder of Segway dying because his Segway fell off a cliff.
Try the washer fluid.
Shouldn’t Ricky Williams have done it the true American way? Supporting our friendly large pharmaceutical companies and becoming addicted to opioids; now he could be selling blowjobs behind a dumpster somewhere in Kentucky for dime bags?
Much better than the original.
Bonus that I’d pop a cap in a ninja if Mary J. Blige told me to.
Ooooof. She kinda perrty.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpDQJnI4OhU
tWBS, as the resident golfer, what is the ruling on that?
That’s Rebecca Mulligan……..
She’s holding a shotgun dude. da Fuq you think the ruling is?
I took this earlier today. Isn’t she pretty, even in the snow?
My plants don’t know what to think; snow, then 70-degF the last few weeks.
Hehehehehe….funny you should say that.
(haven’t published this one yet bcuz it’s my favorite…I can stop giggling)
Li’l help? Hey buddy…..AWWWWW C’MON I’M A FREAKING DAFFODIL!!!!!!
Most things in my yard are “Nope; you ain’t foolin’ me with this warm shit; we know there is another freeze comin’ up Mr. Sol!”
I’m OK!!!!!!!
Oh, so you also had the usual day at work.
Dracula’s teabags.
Wow.
Does this guy have a wall oven in his den? I can’t see the floor but I guarantee you that it’s avocado shag carpeting. And isn’t that Mel Cooley? What’s he going to do with Miss Giant Knockers, impress her with his cooking? Actually, he probably is, that’s why he has an oven right there. But still, I like the big tits but I don’t care for anything else here, which is why I don’t have a Thermodor oven and nobody else does and that’s why they’re out of business, because of advertisements like this that just confused people. Let this be a lesson to you for all your future ad campaigns for major appliances: show the big titties and keep the old queens out of it.
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0212586/
goddamnit that joke was around when I was in jr. high; well done.
Howdy.
THAT’S YOUR OPINION!!!!!!!!!
Settle down. “Howdy” just means he wants you to cup his balls and sing show tunes.
“MOOOOON RIVER!”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CfZiAiYNcI8
Ha!!!! I’m not falling for that one….again.
*still
Fuck everything.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U6eFQDaJmnk
Even when he’s right, Drew is still a fucking moron.
Talking about the GQ article?
(I shouldn’t do this, but…)
What’s your beef, sports fan?
I fucking can’t stand Ricky Williams.
You want to smoke weed. Fine.
Smoke weed but don’t get fucking high and mighty about it. Don’t tell me it makes you better at anything other than being stoned. I get drunk, I don’t fucking turn into James Joyce.
He is a moron that decided to go to an insanely expensive, fake school to wrap his drug usage into a faux aura of spiritualism and now he has figured out how to sell that shit to even dumber mother fuckers…
His shit is a “cash for gold” scam for rich hippies. I wouldn’t really bother except the people that buy this shit are the same ones that refuse to vaccinate their fucking kids.
oh god, we gonna have to deal with weed snobs now? shit…….
Its the same shit that is sold by Alex Jones, only with a tiny amount of THC.
These “all natural” products are a joke. For all we know, its just Ricky’s bong water mixed with Vaseline.
Hehehehe…..that made me giggle.
Expect a cease and desist letter from Ricky’s lawyer, Bhodie Bronkowitz, Esq. for revealing proprietary product information.
Are you saying you’re not James Joyce?
This place is. It’s pretty damned good too. I need to go back there soon.
http://www.jamesjoyceirishpub.com/
better funny:
https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/we-must-reduce-government-spending-on-everything-except-our-luxury-office-renovation
Nothing says healing quite like a “Ricky’s Choice Vape Cartridge”
Snow day today, may have taken it upon myself to do a little day drinking and strategic napping.
/Lady LemonJello had to work, and did not leave adult supervision behind to monitor my behavior.
How are we, Imaginary Internet Friends?
Bored, bring on whatever football league that they are going to come up with next.
Hell, we’ll take Lesser Footy but with cars.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=flKzjuDhFDs
I too am bored. So much so that I was just flipping channels and landed on Big Bang Theory.
/ducks rotten fruit
HEAR ME OUT. Kaley Cuoco in a Wonder Woman outfit. Not bad.
Still not enough to keep you from being punished.
To the Phantom Zone with him!
Just sayin’….
was able to get some stuff done for school today. I thought this storm would be worse.
found another funny:
“The Shape of Water” is what you’d get if NPR directed “Hellboy.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JhyCE3T6SAc
Hey Ice Steelers fans, why is Jake Guentzal shitting the bed points wise for a month? Is he hurt or something?
He had a goal and two assists tonight.
/Buddy Cole’s Hole Door Flies Open
“I haven’t seen bears frolicking on the beach like this since …”
oh, and every year I do 2 or 3 entries in my office pool, which usually has about 200 total. #1 is always “logic” #2 “insanity” #3 a mix, but with my “NC State best case scenario.”
This year, my #2 “insanity” entry is in 2nd place, 4.5 points out of 1st. There are upset bonuses. Had Cincy not blown a 22-pt lead AND Houston choked AND UM hit that miracle shot (1st place also had both NV and UM in S16), I would be ahead by like 40 points and almost a sure winner.
I could still still win, so long as Clemson beats Kansas at least (this bracket has Nova winning, and Clemson in the Final Four).
My love of #5 seeds has me tied for 10th place in mine. If Gonzaga sneaks into the final four I could actually win the whole thing.
UVa losing killt me early. When you’re sitting within striking distance of the top, but have about half the PPR of those ahead of you (and behind you too!!!) it ain’t hard to spot the pattern.
My free fall to (almost) the bottom on Sat and Sun was a thing to behold, tho.
CAN YOU BET ON IF THE LOYOLA NUN DIES?
Wowzers, you know me. The preview is in the can, and the potential ded-ness of that sweet old lady is indeed addressed.
I laid $36 on ‘Eventually”. Got a really good feeling about this one…
I went to a bunch of other sites, came back to this one, scanned the comments and laughed at my own joke.
/time to put down the bottle time?
//headed for bed
I’m really disappointed with Mr. Williams. The fact that he didn’t call his company, much less one of his products, “Ricky’s Sticky Icky” not only offends me as a markter, but as a person who writes on an NFL dick joke blog from his parent’s basement.
You really let us all down, Ricky.
Banner hammer.
So if there’s pot Pop Tarts, how long until we get pot Toaster Strudel? The icing for this would be green, of course.
Six months.
Blarf!
His full name is Blarfolomew.