Above is pictured the first-edition cover of a fantastic book, Walter Miller, Jr.’s “A Canticle For Liebowitz.” Be warned, even I found it a tad dark (and square on the nose social commentary, which made it all the more chilling). But one will also feel like a Jesuit-by-osmosis afterwards, which is the tie-in for tonight’s commenting. For ’tis Easter Eve, and celebrants or no, we are faithfully hoping for an all-Jesuit final of Loyola-Chi**** v. Villanova. Because fuck Michigan, and especially fuck Kansas (though thanks for beating Duke). I’m sure Jesus Himself would agree, and consider it a fine early Resurrection Day present.
#11(S) Loyola-Chi**** (+5.5, +230) v. #3(W) Michigan (6:09, TBS)
Both of these teams play solid defense, but the Ramblers’ is a touch above that. In the tourney especially, it’s been nothing short of fantastic. Should they continue to have flawless offensive motion like they did in the Flacco Eight, then Loyola is the value play here, not just the sentimental one. Michigan still relies too much on the 3, and chucker teams can always go cold. The one issue to watch is whether the Wolverines can successfully leverage their size advantage into a rebounding mismatch. That would likely turn the tide in their favour, and set Hippo a-drinkin. But surely we can get Sister Jean to the finals, at least!
#1(E) Villanova v. #1(MW) Kansas (+5, +180) (8:49, TBS)
Let’s appreciate for a moment the difference between this and the ladies’ dance, where all #1 seeds advanced. A fun tournament has to have a mixture of power and entropy (ok, I’d be fine with ALL entropy), and so far the Goliath factor has come from Villanova. They’re really good, y’all. Have been all season. Kansas…is more up and down, even during games. They almost pissed away a huge lead against both Seton Hall and Clemson, and needed a certain tripping enthusiast to choke in the Flacco Eight. It’s a sign of great respect for both Loyola and ‘Nova that the Jayhawks are a half-point away from as big an underdog as the Ramblers in this round despite the 1 seed and the pedigree. And I don’t have any cash on this moneyline (and did nae when they were +200 and +195, respectively).
Headline on ESPN: “Pitino, still upset over firing, will skip Ky. Oaks”
This is odd…normally he likes to be around fillies who finish in under two minutes.
“Nailed it!” — John Holmes
“Damn straight!”
-Some Romans
Yeah, there’s no need for KY when Rick is in the house.
Three Seconds From Organism (artist’s conception)
A vastly superior song with “Wicked” and a word that begins with “G” in the title:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2oPeZFOpPAM&ab_channel=StoneTemplePilots
STP sucks and that is one of their worst..
/Actually likes a lot of their stuff and this song.
..Musical enjoyment is subjective; don’t be a hatin’ unless you are talkin’ ’bout tWBS’ selections.
STP was ok. This was the only song worth remembering
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=59_x5-IfVjs
The new lead singer sang the national anthem at the hockey game I went to last week. He did fine.
Wow! The story of the Amazon Prime box I received this morning was bought and turned into a Netflix Original Series and has already been cancelled after only three episodes! We’re still negotiating the movie rights though.
“The Battery That Almost Died”
* And by “almost” we mean not even close because huge fucking box with a shitload of inflatable shit.
For the movie they’re changing the box into a brooding teen.
“2 million and six points on the back end!” – Hollywood Insider Old School Zero
Well, you use a battery in a box, I’ll watch it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cncoJB_C-m0
Always nice to be let into your secret world.
Har har – this post was for WCS hating on the song
No I was making an Alex Mack joke.
I cult hear you.
No that’s Allison Mack.
They are related.
/was the joke.
I got it; hence the har har
why does no one hold WWII against Italy like they do Germany and Japan?
Better food?
Because Italy managed to do absolutely nothing.
Isn’t there a joke about Italian rifles for sale? Never been shot and only dropped once.
Because Italy only invaded the “shithole countries.”
I’m back at my parents’ place, and this toilet is not properly handling my Passover shit.
It will come back to life tho.
Yours was better too.
Fuck it, I quit.
Now do one with “enemas” instead
Internet Dad already deleted that one.
Well, matzo luck to you.
Damn, yours was better.
Something something matzo balls something something
A lesser-known Plague of Egypt.
Why should this shit be different from other shits?
Please tell me you’ve been home since I sent that Treehouse to you. I picture it just sitting outside your door, getting warmer and warmer with the rising of each sun.
Ha. I popped into Colorado for 30 hours in the last three weeks. Pulled your beer inside and will drink it super troopers 2 opening weekend with a college buddy. Hugely grateful.
And now, alternate takes from The Ten Commandments.
*Moses is brought in in chains*
Moses: Get your hands off me, you damn dirty Egyptians!
Now I wanna see Ten Commandments with Troy McClure.
Moses was pro-sword rights
Almost as much as Solomon.
Chuck Heston would’ve totally called Africans apes.
another funny:
JUDAS: any weekend plans?
JESUS: either exploring a cave or sleeping in, haven’t decided
JUDAS: maybe you’ll do both
JESUS: what?
JUDAS: what?
That’s fucking funny!
If it’s not the best show on TV, it’s close.
Pizz in her face?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TEVvOATOCGo
Who the fuck is this color guy? I seem to have stumbled onto the Kansas announcing team and he is a fucking idiot.
/googles
Scott Pollard
/image search
Yep, seems about right.
Dude! Those late 90’s Kings team were the shit.
GorillaBallsgif
Wasn’t Christie the guy whose wife followed around literally everywhere? No wonder he was so angry.
/hits the Googles again
https://deadspin.com/jackie-christie-says-she-weighs-doug-christies-balls-to-1784072292
Christ, that’s even worse than I remember.
Anyone who punches Rick Fox is just fine in my book.
I’m watching the TruTV feed with the Villanova homers and it’s not good, but it’s tolerable since we’re rooting the same way.
Also, yeah, Pollard’s a cock.
Trevor Phillips, the NBA years.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOxdjI5wG_o
I loathe this song.
PLAY IT AGAIN!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=me87-0uZeSA
Orioles have one hit so far against the Twins. It’s the 9th inning.
Don’t care either way, but comedy is comedy.
They got a hit? Damn.
Twins always Bogart the weed.
I just got banned from the Middle Tennessee Bigfoot message boards for posting pictures of bears on their hind legs and claiming it as proof of Bigfoot.
it’s the simple things in life.
That’s just odd.
So, good job.
Mom: Who are you rooting for.
Me: ‘Nova I guess.
Mom: I’m rooting for Kansas City because they beat Kentucky. We hate Kentucky, right?
Me: Yes Mom, we hate Kentucky. But that was Kansas State. This is Kansas. And there is no Kansas City.
Mom: Well who is Kansas State playing?
Me: Where’s the icepick, Mom. I’ve got an itch behind my left eye.
“HURRY UP WITH HIS COLOREDBALL I WANNA WATCH MAH STORIES”
Well Padre Weaselo’s watching the Fifteen… Ten Commandments.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nXeTsWGPT0w
Love that flick.
What should I do tonight?
Finish last night’s pizza and order 2 more?
I finished it this morning. It’s too expensive. Maybe if I go get a bake at home pizza.
I got an awesome one at the grocery store today.
Only 3 bucks.
Now I’m just too lazy to fire up the oven and cook the fucker.
Bourble?
I drank two bottles of wine and a beer last night, and it’s not fun anymore.
troll on bumble
I haven’t done that for a while.
my go to is “volunteer at the kids burn unit”
Beat off, nap, beat off again, nap, drink, nap.
It takes too long to beat off thanks to my medication.
Sadly, I know what you mean. It takes forever to beat you off.
Haldo
Sure glad I decided not to bet on ‘Nova, huh?
To be fair, you may be high.
I’m not high!!!! YOU’RE….
Oh wait, yes I am.
(in truth I’m really not…but I will be momentarily)
I will be merely be drunk soon, so please get high enough for both of us.
You can count on me.
Only to 21.
*20.5
Well that was just….mean.
BREAKING NEWS: KANSAS HAS SCORED A POINT
KANSAS IS BACK!
Ugh. Carry on Wayward Son was awful even when it was a hit, and that’s by far their best work.
Granted I did not watch the movie closely, but I don’t remember this scene.
If his character wasn’t named Freddy Splooger, someone should get fired.
YOU HAVE THE DVD THEN?
The laserdisc. It’s stained but still functional.
Who drew up the Kansas game plan, Sam Brownback?
FACT; his ancestor came about the name by eating Eleanor Tigby’s roast pie which caused explosive diarrhea. Name later changed to Brownback.
I predict the final score will be 72-18.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ljlvfkb1Q4U&list=RDLjlvfkb1Q4U&t=8
9-2!!!
THIS GAME IS OVER FOLKS
“What do the smaller ones taste like?”
(Note: Was gonna go with “What do the black ones taste like?” but you guys are totally immature.)
*closes wizard of oz porn tab*
At least you know how the brick road got yellow.
I’m not immature!!! YOU’RE…
Oh wait, yes I am.
Now the best I can do in my $$ pool is 3rd. Stupid Catholics (I can say that because I’m Catholic. And because Catholics are stupid.)
On that note, go Nova (which is Spanish for “no go” or whatever).
Also, hi everyone.
GO NO GO!
No go is going, no?
Crow gotta find any amusement he can.
No go Nova? You have a point.
everyone girl i met who rooted for kansas was good looking. You can’t explain that.
I only ever dated one girl who was a KU fan. She was hot.
But a serious pain in the ass too.
Shoulda asked her to use a smaller strap-on.
OK settle down over there.
😛
I’m sending the alarm because the huge ones will give your hemorrhoids fits.
They’re the only ones who escape Kansas.
You can escape Kansas in two ways…
That is fucking awesome.
Maybe he should switch with Scarecrow because I would assume killing her gives him courage (given what a dipshit coward he is from what little I remember).
Or am I overthinking this?
Yes.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-QPB9NBUG2g
Nice, baseball is on for me to ignore until October.
Raftery looks like they found a bum off the street and put him in a suit, gave him a mic, but forgot to bathe him or comb his hair.
So…pretty much like always.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WlBiLNN1NhQ
Love him. He looks like W.C. Fields.
I’m really kicking myself for not submitting a bracket. I totally predicted the final would be Michigan and one of those other teams, and I even predicted that other game that happened. By “kicking myself” I mean that I’m eating a sandwich.
Holy shit, is that real?
https://washingtonmonthly.com/2009/09/18/joe-barton-environmental-visionary/
The actual quote is even worse than this meme.
Yeah, I actually just googled and read it.
What a retard.
I wonder which party he’s in.
lol j/k
Too bad it wasn’t the Donner Party.
Can replies make the banner?
http://www.reactiongifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/orson_wells_Slow-Clap.gif
Agreed; that is noice!
The man makes a lot of sense.
i have some cheap vodka and takeout sushi. After a 6 day workweek, let’s get hammered!
Folks
grrrrrrrr Sharks don’t play till 10:30pm. what to do till then?
As a Sharks’ fan, I suggest you beat yourself with a hammer.
It’s still wide open (phrasing).
Just saying….
Remember when I was leading after the first weekend? Good times!
Remember when I was top 3 and then UVa fucked up?
OH yeah right….and a lot of my other shitty picks too.
Mistakes were made. On all sides.
good funny.
Well I’ve booked my tickets to San Antonio and bet my life savings on Loyola so now it’s time to take a long sip of coffee and check the basketball scores…
Reminds me of one my favorite tweets. To paraphrase:
Socrates: This man fancies he know something but he knows nothing
Socrates’ friend Darryl: Fuck him up Socrates
Bittersweet ramble song? I nominate this one.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wI9req9YF5A
All right, I guess I’ll turn the Ice Giants on.
Uhhhh before you do, I have some bad news…
I know they’re not making the playoffs, but it’s either that or watch an encore of Dellin Betances giving up every stolen base known to man.
Scratch that: Apparently the Nets are on, fuck that.
On the plus side, at least they won’t be losing in the second round of hte playoffs. On the negative side, all your best players seem to be on other teams! Brassard and Hagelin (I think?) on the Penguins, and that other guy on Tampa.
Wait, McDonagh or Miller?
Oh right, they threw in Miller. So both I guess. AND Callahan?
New rule: The captain will get traded to Tampa.
Also Jimmy Vesey, presumably, back playing for Nashville in his dreams right now.
Go Villanova.
When Sister Jean dies next week, it’s all their fault.
Cat: Wow Jackpot!!!! Those are some big fucking mice.
Damn. Still was fun to see Loyola get that far.
I worry this Custer’s stand will be just as futile as the one that we don’t worry as much about.
I’mma go read. Fuck off, world/life.
Fuck you Michigan.
Bo Schembechler was really a woman….and she was Chris Webber’s regular on saturday nights.
Poor Buck
Ramblers doing the bad kind of rambling, not the good kind.
Are they Rambl(ing) On
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2JyBbShDQh4
Or maybe Ramblin’ Men?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VxoXn-0Ezs