Your “I Need This Validation Of My Prognostication Skills” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News:

  • The Patriots have traded Brandin Cooks & a 4th-rounder to the Rams in exchange for the Rams 2018 first-round pick & a sixth-round pick.
    • At least Dreamboat still has Gronk. For now.
    • For statistical purposes, the Rams now have only one third-round pick, three fourth-round picks, and two sixth-round picks in the 2018 draft. They also have given up a second-round pick in 2019.
      • The Rams now look like the George Allen [Redacteds] of the early 70s that had no rookies.
      • The emphasis seems to be on ensuring that their new stadium is full to capacity when it opens, with hopefully a defending Super Bowl champion inside it.
        • The Rams’ Vegas odds have responded to all the changes, dropping from 18-1 to 10-1.
  • The NFL offseason workout program dates have been announced.
    • to quote: As per Article 21 of the Collective Bargaining Agreement, each club’s official, voluntary nine-week offseason program is conducted in three phases:
      • Phase 1: Strength & conditioning, plus rehab assignments
      • Phase 2: Individual player instruction & drills; no live contact or offence vs. defence
      • Phase 3: 10 days of OTAs
        • No live contact is permitted, but 7-on-7, 9-on-7, and 11-on-11 drills are permitted.
          • Expect Gruden to be grinding about that.
        • Mandatory veterans minicamp
    • In addition, each club may hold a rookie football development program for a period of seven weeks, which in 2018 may begin on May 14
      • Which means the Draft is just over three weeks away.
    • Most teams are starting either April 9 or 16.
      • The exceptions are the Falcons & Bears, who got started today.
  • The Cowboys have ROCKED the ticketing world by dumping Ticketnazi Ticketmaster for SeatGeek.
    • They have also bought a stake in the company.
    • SeatGeek is looking to expand beyond its resell market.
  • If it’s Tuesday, it must be “Stealing from Crimbeat!”
    • Prosecutors in Florida will not pursue felony charges against New York Jets wide receiver Robby Anderson.
      • Anderson was arrested on suspicion of multiple charges after he allegedly failed to yield during a traffic stop.
      • He was formally charged with reckless driving on Friday.
        • “The felony charge was downgraded to a misdemeanor charge due to a possible discrepancy regarding the initial estimated speed, but there is no doubt that the defendant was driving recklessly,” the State Attorney’s Office said.
      • Of course, he also faces…THE GINGERHAMMER!
    • Drew Brees has sued Vahid Moradi of CJ Charles Jewelry in San Diego over alleged fraud.
      • Brees claims that he purchased roughly $15 million worth of jewelry, and that it was independently appraised at being worth $9 million less than the price Brees paid at the time for the items.
      • The defence lawyer sounds like a real dick advocate for his client:
        • “Drew Brees aggressively purchased multi-million dollar pieces of jewelry,” Eric M. George told TMZ. “Years later, claiming to suffer ‘cash flow problems,’ he tried to bully my client into undoing the transactions. . . . Mr. Brees’s behavior and his belief that he was wronged because the jewelry did not appreciate in value as quickly as he hoped both demonstrate a lack of integrity and contradict basic principles of both economics and the law.”

Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Bruins at Lightning – 7:30PM | NBCSN / Sportsnet1
    • Stars at Sharks – 10:30PM | Sportsnet1
  • NBA:
    • Raptors at Cavaliers – 7:00PM | TSN4
    • Warriors at Thunder – 8:00PM | TNT
    • Spurs at Clippers – 10:30PM | TNT / TSN5
  • MLB:
    • White Sox at Blue Jays – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
    • Indians at Angels – 10:00PM | ESPN / TSN2
    • Rangers at A’s – 10:00PM | Sportsnet360
  • Futbol:
    • 2018 CONCACAF Champions League:
      • Semifinal Leg #1: Toronto FC vs. Club America – 8:00PM | TSN
  •  WWE:
    • Smackdown – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
      • the “go home” show before Wrestlemania.
        • expect lots of talk but no risk of injury.

Many, many thanks to Hippo for the hoopsball coverage and the associated nights off. Did I waste them? YOU BET!

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Unsurprised

Gentlemen …

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Holy shit, that’s awesome.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Question for the commentist party…

Should one hypothetically regret wasting two years of emotion on someone who can’t be bothered with you when the chips are down? Or is it better to be happy that you’re not willing to waste a third?

Glass half empty vs half full? What say you?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J2LgLbs4mIU

Mr. Ayo

Don’t cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it.

So if you can be happy for the not wasted third year, do that.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Agreed. Thanks.

Trying my best.

Unsurprised

It’s a sunk cost fallacy, not a sinking cost fallacy. Man the lifeboats!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Yep, big time. Sadly, when emotions are involved instead of money, tWBS be not so smrt.

Unsurprised

That’s what you have a chatroom full of lawyers for.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Meh. The worst part is knowing it’s my own fault. I’ll say no more.

Openly defective is the lover you elected..
A portrait she was bound to portray.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2XfVml6o24

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Well that was an unnecessarily long work dinner.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Booze at least?

Senor Weaselo

Just as long as you didn’t stick your dick in a pudding. It might still be good pudding, and you can spend the rest of the dinner explaining that, but no one’s going to eat it because you stuck your dick in it.

(That is a surprisingly great quote.)

Don T

If you wanna finish early, ask to split a dessert, demand to share the spoon / fork.

scotchnaut

Seamus, after the third date…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_MC4QCidHrs

scotchnaut

And much like all the babies out there, it’s time to crawl into my crib. Nighters.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Nite dude. Sleep well.
Thanks for making me laugh, fwiw.

Mr. Ayo
theeWeeBabySeamus

Hahahahahaahaha.

Well played.

Dick.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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No matter what; that series can’t hold my attention.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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scotchnaut

Seamus, before things went south…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bxu0x43d-W0

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Hehehehehehehe…that was funny up there smart guy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YrWsmlJSiw

scotchnaut

Seamus, after the second date…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZ_3G4xqSDQ

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

Watercolor or oil pastel?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Don T

Charcoal. Very risqué, especially in segregated states.

Senor Weaselo

Bonus point if the brush used was also the dude’s junk.

Don T

“His intermittent traces suggest anxiety and early-stage Peyronie’s Disease.”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

I forgot. What movie is this from?

Don T

“My Dinner with Andre”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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scotchnaut

“Ma! Miss Harlot ’53 winked at me. Is we married now?”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Fronkenshteen

I am fucking up. Shouldn’t of drunk but drank. My reward will be (even MORE) icy silence at home. HOORAY ALCOHOLISM!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Please pull your shit together. People are counting on you.

theeWeeBabySeamus

But only to 20.5.

Oh no wait….that’s me.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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scotchnaut

“People are counting on you.”

Really, Moose? He’s not an abacus, he’s a human being!

theeWeeBabySeamus

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theeWeeBabySeamus

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Mr. Ayo

Silence at home? And drunk? Sounds like a win to me.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Pretending???

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Well looggit GLOREEGUYROB and his big shiny Canadian gold Madness medal. You don’t hear me bragging about my bronze! That’s because third is the gritty man’s medal. The lunchpailer. The every man. He deserves his share of the resp–

/Is nominated as the Republican candidate to the Indiana State Senate

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Spanky Datass

Silver Medal is shine! WOOOOO SO MUCH SHINE!!1!!1!

WCS

reel Winners don’t get metals or trophys imho

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

hehehehe

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

So, Drew Brees’ grounds for his lawsuit is more or less that he’s an idiot?

Hell, I gotta get in on that action. I’m the biggest idiot there is. I could be rich.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook

Ha ha ha while you all were playing your stupid basketball brackets I was racing in the real-time Volvo Ocean Race, Leg 7, from Auckland New Zealand to Itajai Brazil through the Southern Ocean and around Cape Horn, and I finished today with a leg-time of 16 days 23 hours 13 minutes and 38 seconds coming in at very respectable 19,497th place oh man oh man I’m the coolest cat there is you betcha.

note: not on an actual boat

rockingdog

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Brick Meathook

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Senor Weaselo

“But did you roll it?” -FailRace

King Hippo

Boots on teh Ground!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Spanky Datass

“But Coach, was it a CARBOAT?”– Chad Ochocinco

BrettFavresColonoscopy

:fart noise:

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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rockingdog

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

I’m gonna write that one down for future use.

herodotus450

Hahaa! 90.1% is an A- is my book.

King Hippo

Wisconsin done elected a LIBTARD WOMAN!!111 to its Supreme Court ,, smh

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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litre_cola

Evenin commentists I hope you are all well.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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rockingdog

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Baaaaaa…errrrrr I mean…’Sup.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

h

ttps://78.media.tumblr.com/42a34ee6a3bc04c43029b71f9a63e71d/tumblr_p6b1j59OJm1vxyh4ro1_500.jpg

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

PBS; the lost episodes.

JustStopDude

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We need a good long…draft and ground war…no deferments…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Gratliff

Goddamn, this is good

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theeWeeBabySeamus

With all due respect…you’ve all got it wrong, btw.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8l5N2eKdvL4

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Wow that looks good.
And also should probably be illegal.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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rockingdog

that looks poisonous.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

o/u on how many heart attacks 16 yr old tWBS had during this 44 seconds?
Bet the over…just saying.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_K3UJUmHREQ

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

16? Guess I was focused on other things at that age.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I was too.

But Dad was NCSU alum before me. I was raised wolven.
Honestly…the night this happened might have been the happiest I ever saw my father.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Granted, at that age 44 seconds…….

theeWeeBabySeamus

YOU CAN’T PROVE ANYTHING!!!!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The sports I watched with my dad were Friday boxing and Grand Prix racing. He gave NFL a try because I liked it but never got into it that much. Friday boxing was a long time ago, damn.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Howdy all.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Hehehehe…I really miss Far Side.

Senor Weaselo

Are they there to RETURN THE SLAAAAB?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFREs4GaJVU

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Gratliff

Tie game and Claude Giroux has 2 games to get 3 for his first 100 point season.

Gratliff

Or maybe not. Isles 1 goal away from Isling yet another game away

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

With all due respect to @balls, this was the greatest NCAA final in history.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=duu3JLjVMZY

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

And this, of course, was the greatest three minutes and fifteen seconds of play.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=edylGVZXIQc

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I know there’s not much love for UConn here beyond me and Horatio, but of the five times they have been to the final four, they have won the title four times. That’s amazing.

scotchnaut

I just ate a pre-made Greek Salad from my grocery store. If the world ended right now, I’d be doubly disappointed…

JerBear50

Hey, it may be just a salad, but anal is anal. Die happy, my friend.

JerBear50

Dear Fantasy Sexbag, is it normal that my salad wants anal a lot? I mean, like I’m getting it a couple times a week. Is that ok?

scotchnaut

Most Under-Rated Kitchen Implement?

I’m going ‘turkey baster’-she drinks like a sailor and ensures that the interior is moist and the skin is golden brown. What more can you ask of a plastic tube?

Unsurprised

“living well is the best revenge”. yeah but obviously im not gonna do that. whats the second best. cutting their brakes, right

— derek (@eedrk) February 6, 2017

Senor Weaselo

From what I’ve heard (honestly not sure who at this point, maybe Hermana Weaselo via Tumblr?) if you slash all four tires it gets covered by insurance, so maybe slashing three?

rockingdog

found a funny:
earth sucks nothing works. only like 2 volcanoes ever go off. have to wash dishes before i put them in the dishwasher. so tired of this shit.

King Hippo

a big, fuck off volcanic explosion would be a cool way for the world to end

Unsurprised

What’s the ML on the Yellowstone Supervolcano?

King Hippo

I mean, it’s due amirite??

Unsurprised

Long overdue.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’d certainly prefer that over a nuclear apocalypse.

Gratliff

Flyers beat the best team in hockey and immediately get smoked by the fucking Islanders. Love this team.

ballsofsteelandfury

If we’re going back in time, we might as well go back to the greatest moment in college basketball history:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PjgPfFjPsio

King Hippo

I did enjoy this quite a bit, but the next year sucked eggs. Still believe Larry Johnson was shaving points then.

ballsofsteelandfury

The next year never happened.

JerBear50

Those grandma-ma costumes didn’t come cheap. Jesus, Hurley looks like he’s fucking 14.

rockingdog

geeze

scotchnaut

I’m sure y’all got some examples of guys that ‘out-coached’ the opposition-lay them out here-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d69FYrAGnRA

scotchnaut
Senor Weaselo

“Can do!” -Sal Alosi

King Hippo

Best back-to-back leadoff home runs in el beisbol? chuh chuh!

/2 bills at +118

Senor Weaselo

Stanton with the platinum sombrero (0/5, 5 Ks). Cue the “Why did we trade for Stanton” white-hot taeks. (Meanwhile, Didi Gregorius has 8 RBIs on the day, and is still knighted by the Dutch and all.)

rockingdog

found a funny:

2013: omg hahaha a major brand’s twitter account used the word bae

2018: the Wendy’s twitter account just told me to go fuck myself.

scotchnaut

“Drew, this trouble that you’re going through? Don’t worry too much about it. Things could be worse.”

-Mina Brees

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I can understand suing a jeweler when it’s genuine fraud (like he sells you a “chocolate diamond” but it’s actually a piece of poop) but complaining that it’s not worth as much as you want it to be sounds kind of lame.

Senor Weaselo

I am interested in what aggressive purchasing is, though.

SonOfSpam

I have discussed chocolate diamonds with multiple (like 2) women, and the consensus is that any receipt of chocolate diamonds as a gift would result in castration.

scotchnaut

Whether the Rams FO is using meth or math, they be getting things done!

Senor Weaselo

Little of column A…

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

mæth?

Senor Weaselo

“If you’re waiting to see the Nets battle the 76ers…”

Okay, Michael Kay, let me stop you right there. Nobody is waiting for that.

SonOfSpam

Congrats on being the best basketball guy at hoops prognostipicking.