Your “My Nuts Are Falling” Friday Evening Open Thread

Seriously.  Acorns, hickory nuts….even a persimmon hit me in the head yesterday while I was cleaning up hurricane debris.  Gravity is stupid.

(This vid is very NSFW, btw)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=20h-PJPMap4

But the squirrels like it…

Ringo

I’ve told this story to some of you privately, but I still think it’s funny.  So Imma tell it again here publicly.

My pair of ducks are no longer with us.  This is them.  Or….WAS them…

Those ducks loved me.  Mostly because I fed them twice daily.  Unfortunately, the male was small and sickly from the jump.  It’s actually kind of surprising he lived as long as he did.

A few weeks ago, I found him dead, near the water’s edge, with the female there by his side grieving.  Assuming ducks can actually grieve.  I honestly don’t know if they can, but she followed me as I removed the male’s body and disposed of it.  And then she stuck close to the house for several days, quacking her little ass off at me.

I knew his demise meant she’d also soon go away to find a new mate, which apparently she now has.  I haven’t seen her now for a few weeks.

But while I raised them, and while I was feeding them regularly, the local squirrel population got wise to the feeding schedule, and began also showing up regularly to get their share.  One of those squirrels has a tail which has a very distinct ringed pattern.  So, of course I named him “Ringo”.

Well, since the ducks went bye bye, I’ve still been getting the sad “we’re hungry” eyes from all of the squirrels, so I’ve continued to feed them.  Yes, I’m a sucker.

Anywhoooooo…..

Ringo disappeared for a couple of weeks recently.  And I more or less thought he was goner as well.  But he showed back up a few days ago with a giant (and almost fully healed) scar across his back.  I don’t know the particulars of the incident which caused this wound, of course.  But he’s a tough little shit, apparently.

And his name is now Ringo Scarr.

Oh come on!!!!!!  It’s funny, dammit!!!!!!!

Ah, to be sixteen again, huh?

Also, is Ringo Starr a pedophile or what?????????

I Gotta Go Buy A New Leaf Blower I Guess

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RPg63uxYwN0

Some of you might recall that back when the summer solstice hit, I wrote a post featuring Summer Glau

So you should not be terribly surprised now, since tomorrow is the the autumnal equinox, the first day of Autumn sooooo….well…. yeah…

Autumn Reeser week evahbodeh!!!!!!

Oh Crap, she gon’ shoot me with a flare gun.  I hope the leaves don’t catch fire.

Enjoy…

I know that beach.  Never seen her there, however.  So, now I’m sad.

Equinox Time Fo’ Da Ladies!!!!

(see what I did there?)

Have a great weekend, everyone.

Love ya’s

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theeWeeBabySeamus
An unapologetic, even if often manic-depressive (it's a requirement given his choices of sports teams), fan of NC State University, the Baltimore Ravens and the Baltimore Orioles. When not parked in front of the computer and/or TV, can often be found on the golf course shouting obscenities to no one in particular.
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Wakezilla

The second dude, lying on the red leaves looks like he’d make a great TV version of Superman.

The last dude, he looks like he is dumber than a sack of potatoes. Not that it matters cause he has a fantastic bod…with the exception of the legs

Senor Weaselo

Leaf briefs don’t sound like a lot of fun.

Brick Meathook

The Shitty Clippers are playing RAMMIT! on Sunday at the Coliseum and tickets are going on StubHub starting at $30.

And I have to be at an annual meeting of a secret society I belong to. Fuck! I’d go to that game for thirty bucks even if I’m way up in the stands. I could use my new camera.

Fucking secret societies. I’m not supposed to be telling you any of this.

Senor Weaselo

Is it the Ancient, Mystic Society of No Homers?

Unsurprised

They’re allowed to have one.

Brick Meathook

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Unsurprised
WCS

…and Brill still loses by 15 because #MAGA

Redshirt

We need a picture of Trump blowing Putin. That’s the only way to end this thing.

WCS

That wouldn’t be enough to stop these cultists. Trump is trying to be “bigger” than Jim Jones.

Unsurprised

We’re not fortunate enough that it would end the same way.

Unsurprised

Yup

Redshirt

Holy shit! Compared to that, Ohio Political Ads are Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood segments.

Unsurprised

“Paul Gosar the Gosarian”

Wakezilla

In terms of personal life, Paul Gosar is the Aaron Rogers of Arizona Politicians

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

NO TALKING IN THE QUIET CAR!!!!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

A lefty too?

Unsurprised

Alex Smith wept.

Fronkenshteen

Mighty Fulham in the early window tomorrow morning. West Ham in the early window Sunday. SETTING MAH ALARMS NOW

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Is this semaphore or flaghoist?

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Brick Meathook

In the middle of nowhere on the Alaska Highway there’s a cabin with a door with a window in the door and there’s a switch that turns on the light inside the cabin and you flip the switch and look through the window and this is what you see:

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ArmedandHammered

> I turn off switch
the light goes out
>I turn around
You are eaten by a grue.

Redshirt

Its a good thing this is only a picture. If this was real life, I’d feel like they staring into my very soul.

Unsurprised

Not for long.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Is that a hotel gym gym?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Petronel

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

A friend texted me a photo of what appears to be a hotel room floor and his big toe is in the bottom of the frame. He has not responded to my questions asking why he sent that. Should I presume he was kidnapped?

Redshirt

Either that or he’s drunk and wants to take the relationship to the next level.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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litre_cola

Did you get drunk and tell him about your foot fetish?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Why the shit am I still at work?

WCS

Reliving the experience of your ancestors under the Pharaoh?

litre_cola

There is nothing that I could come up with that is even close to this. Well done.

Redshirt

Yeah, way to break the curve.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Redshirt

How did you get that video of me at the Driving Range?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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WCS

Jesse Pinkman never was that athletic.

King Hippo

yeah, Mister White!!

Unsurprised

AIDS has really done a number of Lil’ Jimmy Norton.

Unsurprised

That reminds me of the joke I made when I heard Ralphie May died of penumonia:

“The AIDS diet didn’t go as planned.”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

h

ttp://cdn4.images.motherlessmedia.com/images/CB554FD.gif

OK, I fucking laughed (NSFDFO; nipples and sick humor)

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

h

ttp://66.media.tumblr.com/8ceb8bef7061c40b00d83c361a3116c3/tumblr_obnug5XRFf1vxr9g2o1_400.gif

(NSFDFO due to gravity and nipples)

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook

fixed it
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

No you didn’t.

Unsurprised

So, since the anniversary of Ted Cruz’s pornorino has passed, I’m curious if anyone else has noticed that general genre of porn seems to have exploded in the last year. I can only suspect because it’s basically the last taboo left for porn to exploit.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

o7

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Fronkenshteen

So it turns out Ed Whelan was looking up Dr. Ford on Linkedin BEFORE she was publically named as the victim. Keep in mind, there is absolutely NO REASON republicans can’t withdraw Kavanaugh’s nomination and put some other gop operative on the court before the election. This man is a rapist, and we are about to put him on the highest court in this land because an empowered cult refuses to ever admit guilt or fault in anything. Sickening.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

Words can’t describe how angry this shit makes me. I haven’t been able to leave the house for like 3 days. I didn’t even shower yesterday, and I NEVER do that. I am in like a fugue state about it.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Absolutely.

Fuck those people.

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King Hippo

the Bridget Fonda gif below helps

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Not the dress code at my office.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Nice phone.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Nice shirt.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Fun fact: I met Autumn Reeser at a poker game her (now) husband was hosting. I didn’t recognize her or make the connection when she introduced herself as Autumn, but I was absolutely floored by how beautiful she was. She was so gorgeous it was like she was another species or something.

WCS

homo goddess

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Spanky Datass

“BUT SHE AIN’T GOT NO TITS!” — Great Uncle Datass (Not an exaggeration.)

King Hippo

“small tits are the BEST tits” – HIPPO

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“You only feel that way because they are smaller than yours, fat ass.”

Redshirt

My Grandpa once told me the only thing a man need on a cold day is a nice fire and a well endowed woman*.

He may have used other words than well endowed. Dementia is lovely.

Spanky Datass

My Grandad’s youngest brother (My Great Uncle) was a wonderful man and a good-humored badass and greatly admired busty women. I miss them both … so to say …

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Autumn; did your fingers smell like spring?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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litre_cola

Hippo I am thinking the Trojans will win this evening by 3.5. Wazzu has played nobody and it is in LA. Thoughts?

Wakezilla

Play it safe and put a tenner on the condoms. That way, if Wazzu breaks through, you won’t feel the burn 9 months from now

litre_cola

Haha I got fixed a month ago. Fire away! The line moved to 4.5

King Hippo

still take it

litre_cola

We need to find a sneaky team again like Wyoming last year. They made me a bunch of money.

King Hippo

BYU is back to their normal, pesky selves after a down year. I called their ML win (+22.5) over Bucky Badger, of course did nae bet it.

I read the entire sheet up and down 3x this weekend, didn’t see much I liked. Bet Marshall (+5.5 at home to NC State, that’s a coinflip game) and Sparky (+17,5 at U-Dub because I don’t think the latter is worth a fuck either), but that’s all I liked.

TCU line (-3 at Texas) is awfully low, but it feels all trappist to me, and they could be emotionally flat after shitting themselves against THEEEEE.

King Hippo

I think this is right, and am kicking myself for not saving money for this game.

King Hippo

I must keep my windows open, so I need 3 Benadryl in addition to my extra V-profen and muscle relaxer. Let’s get weird indeed.

WCS

“…and in other news tonight, a Raleigh-area man was arrested last night, after being found naked and yelling at the Bank of America on Third Street, referring to himself as ‘King Hippo.'”

litre_cola

JFF fumbled in the end zone. Hilarity ensued.

King Hippo

having one’s car in the shop is a good diet/nudie bar avoidance tool

WCS

It also cancels out the chance of a DUI, so it’s POPPIN AND DRANKEN TIME
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King Hippo

you have pretty good ideas, especially FOAR a Yinzer no ofence

Redshirt

How did FL Atlantic get a Friday Night game on ESPN? Are they any good or is it a bad week for JV FB?

Mr. Ayo

Kiffin vs Defending National Champions.

Also, points!

King Hippo

the “marquee” game is PAC Twaaaaaalve (Wazzu/Troi Boiz) at 10:30. This is just appetizer.

Spanky Datass

The O/U on this FL Atlantic @ UCF game is 69. So that’s nice.

Mr. Ayo

I think the Over is going to hit.

Spanky Datass

Yep, apparently the sharps agree because the line moved to 75 before kickoff.

Mr. Ayo

Currently at 92. Think those sharps knew what they were doing.

litre_cola

JFF does nawt have the best O-line in Montreal.

Spur

i truly apprentice my homes water pressure. Given enough time it will remove a cheap tattoo.

litre_cola

Evenin commentists how are we all doing?

herodotus450

Owls comin on strong against Central Florida, which appears to be the biggest university in the country with 66,000(!) students.

Spur

That’s like 123,439 stds.

King Hippo

Balmer really giving Noo Yawk a stern test tonite!! So much pride.

King Hippo

#BFIB 1, Dirt Tomsulas nil. WOO!!!!

King Hippo

The Geto Boys are dope as fuck.

I have been so fucking anxious this week, I am finally back under 2 bills! Weight-wise, that is. Also in #HAILGAMBLOR balance, which is bad. But I have some JV and NFL bets out already, including a $10 longshot ML on the Illinois Fightin’ Snowflakes (courtesy of my Illinois grad buddy, they are mascotless right now) to beat the Paedos at truly insane odds.

Unsurprised

Congratulations!

I’m not only under 3, but I’m around 260. So I hope to double down and hit a more acceptable weight closer to yours by Thanksgiving/my birthday.

Spur

I’m finally home. Back to my smells, bed, chair, toilet, etc. Doing my Saturday chores tonight while watching Joey Freshwater pull off an upset.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U-_r1Npsv5I

Spur

Folks

Brick Meathook

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Redshirt

MFW listening to people defend what Kavanaugh is accused of doing because “that’s what boys did in high school”.

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King Hippo

whoever controls the Senate, if there’s a just and merciful God that dickass GOPer in North Dakota best not defeat Heidi Heitkamp.

Unsurprised

She’d still vote for Kavanaugh. So will Manchin. They’re scum.

What the fuck is the point of having a Democratic party with elected officials like them?

Ian Scott McCormick

My daughter just finished her 2nd week of daycare, which means my daughter is sick.

King Hippo

look, you gonna run the family immune system to the wringer sooner or later, might as well get it over with now.

Wakezilla

Oh man, daycares are the worst. I had a friend whose kid spent most of the year sick or in the hospital because of her daycare. Good luck