God is dead. So why not watch a bit of the old football? It’s not like I’m going to judge you.
-Friedrich “The Funky Philologist” Nietzsche
These two wet, stinking dogs are gonna give us many reasons to laugh and joke and cry (that’d be me, mostly). TO THE GAME!
Schmeagles/Jizzants:
Both these squadoos are looking to TURN THEIR SEASON AROUND! according to all the narratives out there. The return of qb Wentz was supposed to have given the Philly side a B12-like shot in the arm but he’s 1-2 as a starter and now he’s without rb Ajayi who is on the IR with the old torn ACL. Will Smallwood or Clement pick up the enormous amount of slack? Remains to be seen. Rumours abound that the front office will be trading for Bell or McCoy or perhaps re-animating the corpse of Wilbert Montgomery. When reached for comment Montgomery said, “I’m not dead yet!” He was promptly clubbed over the head by someone that had an eerie resemblance to Howie Roseman, general manger/necromancer of the Eagles. Philly must have this one because out of division the likes of the Panthers, Saints, Rams and Jags lie in wait. Not pretty. The good old ESPN ran a hit piece on old (so very old) Eli that pointed out that he sucks. The immobile weird face-maker is on pace to be sacked 51 times and his QBR the last two seasons averages out to a paltry 46.5. (that’s really bad) Let’s hope the Giants take this one so that the NFC East will resemble a logjamclusterfuck for many weeks to come.
Have at it, kiddos.
Guns Up!! is gonna fuck me over. Fuck nuggets.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/melania-trump-doesn’t-trust-some-in-the-white-house-considers-herself-one-of-the-world’s-most-bullied-people/ar-BBOemLH?OCID=ansmsnnews11
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bflkeWVTNk0
So I watched the first season of Bojack Horseman a year or so ago expecting a comedy and I hated it. I was then told that you have watch it not as a comedy with serious moments but a serious show with funny moments. So I started watching it again.
I still don’t get it.
Well there’s your mistake
Don’t worry, it has since been rectified.
it’s fucking hilarious!! You just have to lean into the depression parts.
and boy howdy, does it dig deeper into the depression well – much like life itself – every year!
spot on.
Sometime there is some good GIFs from it……
After the end of Q3, Guns Up!! 10, Bloodeyes 7. No weather issues at all. This is some Twilight Zone shit.
/this is why Hippo no bet the over/under, after going like 1 for 10 (last year) trying to figure it out
Now Guns Up!! is trying to control the clock by running the footbaw.
/No, REALLY they IS!!
Evening lizard people. Ice Giants won a game!
and you had carnal relations during 2nd intermission, yes??
Does practicing the Sibelius Violin Concerto count? No? Then no.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bm8yTcgY-bE
Argentina played Iraq, and Spain played Wales today.
Don’t seem very friendly to this here rebel mammal.
Hippo now returns to Guns Up!! as they try to hang on and win this defensing struggle.
they signed they X, Manhattan is ours fair and square ,, smh
– Benjamin Cadbury Trump
Five bucks says Odell Beckham Jr. passes the Locker Room, leaves the stadium and wonders the Earth for the rest of his life in full Giants uniform and pads.
I’m going with he passes gas in the locker room….. still in full Giants uniform and pads.
Right into Eli’s bathtowel.
Giants locker room is like Lord of the Flies.
Eli has the conch….
As a kid, that novel didn’t make sense to me.
As an adult, the fact I didn’t makes sense of that novel as a kid makes perfect sense to me.
Adjustments in the Giant’s locker room: “Look Eli, if you want the Batman lego playset, you gotta play better.”
Double shot of moron there. At least run a trap play or quick slant, get 5 or 6 yards. 7 seconds is an eternity.
STILL TIME FOR PICKSIXKAKKE
shanklor is pleased
Can the Cowboys have Beckham? Double JJ will give NY two 1st rounders, vintage transformers and a case of coke.
No way Dak can over throw Beckham
No, but he can certainly underthrow him.
You have a timeout. WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO USE THE SIDELINE??
LOLGigantes
PI? seriously? oh fuck you NFL
McAdoo was right to bench Manning
We want Geno!
SHORT? From 52?
Ol’ Baby Leg Rosas
15 straight 3rd down tries not successful by the Giants. That is a crazy stat.
Conundrum: OBJ is obviously the capstone of human evolution. He is the complete package. Watching him perform would be akin to listening to Socrates espouse his thoughts to a captive audience.
But he’s an asshole who should be fed face first into a wood chipper. And I would pay money to see that happen.
Especially if he’s catching a ball as he goes in
Does Eli retire at halftime and the Shaq runs the wildcat?
“Hulk Hogan!”
Where??? – Eli
Mesmerizing
Her hills are alive…with the sound of pants unzipping.
LEaving Eli with enough time to throw a backbreaking pick-6
Feed Smallwood! Keep Saquon off the pitch while y’all at it.
Flashback
I got my last 2 lime alkie fizzy waters from the fridge, because I am too lazy to get them 1 at a time. I am such a worthless piece of shit.
That’s just good planning. May as well enjoy the full use of both hands before “the boys” come for your thumbs.
time is indeed running out!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZUcBaeV0Y4
Genuinely shocked they didn’t get a white guy to play Aladdin.
How in the hell are we not getting a CGI Robin Williams as the Genie?! We have the technology!
not enough CGI coke
it’s hard to make that rope fiber look realistic.
At least the Giants will get another shot at drafting a QB with the 2nd overall pick.
And you thought New Jerseyites were pissed about The Situation getting nabbed for tax evasion . .
Ice Giants win Woohoo!
Aladdin is from the banned flying list, that movie shouldn’t be here.
Disney’s hollowness has gotten to the point that they’re stealing ideas from the ideas they stole
Lawd, do the Oilers suck balls.
This makes me happy.
The trick to playing pass defense is to find the ball in the air, and then keep looking at it while you physically assault the receiver.
he tried so hard for that roughing penalty too
Give some more Clement.
Fuck this game. I’m going back to playing my Dark Souls clone.
BFV 1 month. look me up.
Got this going, with some dota in the background, playing total warhammer in the other window and a long island in the hand. can’t let this poofest get me down especially when i dont have any fantasy skin in the game
What’s the point of multi-display setups if there isn’t fantasy skin somewhere on them?
HOTS? I play some HOTS. Always looking to group up.
have it but havent played in 6 months or more.
it’s OK. i get usually get drunk and is late to team-fights.
GreenPowrVan 1229
Gonna be a bloodbath
“Go on…” – Elizabeth Bathory
they can’t all be Kanye’s, right Gratliff?
Eli is going to wreck the guys on Fortnite, work off that anger.