Your “Supplies Running Low. Only 17 Beers Left. Send Help” Sunday Night Football Open Thread

It’s about time we saw the greatness that is Cody Kessler! He actually didn’t play that badly, did he? I’m not gona actually check out what the Jags braintrust said after the game but I do hope we see a Kessler run next week. Overseas, no less. I’d go over some other high/lowlights but that would mean stepping on King Hippo’s junk and I’m not the type. Nope, not me. Definitely not a junk-stepper. One last tilt to go folks… TO THE GAME!

Bengals/Chiefs:

Kansas City is scoring at a rate of 35 per game. Cincy is scoring at a lower rate. The Chiefs have a colander-centric defensive scheme that is quite generous to their opponents. The Bengalis have a wee bit of talent on their team. Here is my prediction-

Joe Mixon? He scores.

Kareem Hunt? He scores.

Tyler Boyd? He scores.

A.J. Green? He scores.

Tyler Eifert? He scores.

Tyreek Hill? He scores.

Travis Kelce? He scores.

John Ross? He doesn’t score.

Sammy Watkins? He scores.

C.J. Uzomah? He scores.

And there you have it. The scorenami ends in the Chiefs winning because that Mahomes kid just can’t be rattled. But don’t you fret-I’ve got faith in Andy Reid and his Gawd-given ability to undermine the talent at his disposal, no matter what level. It won’t happen tonight but somewhere down the road there will be diagrams scribbled on sweaty, marinara-stained napkins. Those napkins will ensure that the Chiefs don’t even sniff the success due them. It’s The Andy Reid Way.

Smoke ’em if ya got ’em. Otherwise, treat yourself to an ice cream sandwich.