I hate the Cowboys. I have for quite some time. Let’s go back to the days before home computers, cell phones and social media. The written word was just beginning to take hold despite what the naysayers were nay saying. A rock applied to the head with varying degrees of force was a good enough means of communication for my grandfather and it’s good enough for me-whatever my name is! Then, as now, oldish white guys decided what was going to be placed before your eyebulbs and as far as football was concerned, they didn’t think they could do any better than the Dallas Cowboys. Little boy me didn’t know what ‘market over-saturation’ was then and still don’t now.
You couldn’t escape. Prime time TV, Sports Illustrated, Sport magazine, Inside Sport magazine-they extolled the countless virtues of a Roger Staubach, a Tom Landry, a Tony Dorsett (until he got a wee bit uppity) or a [insert white player’s name here]. I was able to free myself from the shackles of this form of mind manipulation for the most part. (I sometimes get half a chub when footage of Golden Richards is shown)
I therefore understand the hate/contempt that some have shown for the Seahawks though I don’t partake. To me, Coach Carroll is just another silly millionaire-type coach-guy that lives in a wee bubble of his own making so, whatever. He can loudly chew gum, strut the sidelines and conduct tours of Tower 6 all he likes.
Oh right-the game
Seattle/Dallas:
Gimme Kit Carson and Co. and a late field goal. No more talk of Dallas.
Conduct yourselves accordingly. To what? No idea.
Princeton’s face matching his colors there.
Just think, in all the new no-GLOREEE Boy footbaw leagues, guys like Hurns will be making essentially minimum wage, with no benefits!
Tavon Austin with a touchdown that counts for nothing, perfectly summing up his career.
La’el Collins got away with one there.
The words… they fail me.
Fucking blatant facemask, fuck off
There is a strange a strange and incredible retro-looking Coke machine on the corner of Broadway that gives random sodas for 55 cents.
So facemask is no longer a penalty.
as long as it is a black qb, anything goes!
Cam Newton would agree, but his back really hurts today.
The Uppity Corollary to the rulebook
Watson will be in Arlington by halftime?
the defenses are a wee bit ahead of the offensing units today
Pioneer Square is where you want to be for drinks.
Thing I’ve learned over the past few years, I’m way more sensitive to vicarious emotional pain than vicarious physical pain
Vicarious Emotional Pain is playing Saturday at Coachella.
“Uh, yeah…I know,”
NFL going to implement baseballs strike zone for hitting next season.
“Was it a clean hit?”
Split screen commercials might be the final nail in the me-watching-live-football coffin.
Very important to monetize the 1.2 seconds between plays during 2 minute drills.
IndyCar and then NASCAR really invented/perfected that shitty concept
They tried that in soccer and people rebelled. That shit ended REAL quick.
Is your ankle pointing the right way? Yes? GET THE FUCK UP
Zeke got ran over
Sea-Tac is a great airport to sleep in, not dangerous.
I don’t think I’ve ever flown through there where I didn’t have a three hour layover, minimum.
Ah NASCAR, where the previous year’s champion team closes shop due to funding
Well, I am certainly disappointed, to say the least.
nvm
Wrong: How you are doing it
— King Hippo
FOAR teh morbidly curious:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I20iKREE180
Nope!
Between this and Alex Smith, I would say this is the most gruesome lower body injury year in a while
GAAAAHHHHHHH
I love how the preview thumbnail has the foot already aligning itself to the GPS satellite
goddamned thing won’t me spoiler tag it
Haven’t seen a Carson blow up like that since Jack Paar left The Tonight Show.
Hurns has been in the league for a while, hopefully the NFL covers his medical and he’s got some decent savings
Fortunately he won’t remember the injury in about three years.
Some decent savings, if he’s been smart with his money, that is. I honestly hope that he has. It’s a tricky thing, honestly, with pro athletes coming from a background of poverty/low privilege/etc… I think all leagues need to work harder to ensure that players have stronger financial planning abilities, in order to ensure long-term success post-career.
I like that having a hot latina wife is the new symbol of success.
Only on the left, if you’re GOP it’s still Eastern Europe mail order bride
Should have guessed that a company called PROGRESSIVE was leftist…
Well yeah, you can’t just buy her from her father for a pack of chicle like in the old days.
lol Dak gonna get all post-traumaticy and overthrow every receiver from this point forward
Good of Princeton Red to be out there squeezing Hurns’ hand. (Seriously.)
what’s the sound of one hand clapping?
Golf clap
Double J is going to get Hurns some of Jim Irsay’s good stuff.
Screaming Trees are from Eastern Washington, not Seattle.
The hell happened to Hurns?
He was decapitated.
you missed it. his head rolled across the field like a potato down a hill…
Foot pointing the wrong way.
Foot was planted, dude fell directly on ankle, ball of ankle was rolling around in the sock like a cue ball
he got carted off, his foot is still on the 40 yard line
Too brutal to use in the new Mortal Kombat footballalities
this showing up on everybody’s timelines tonight cursed us all
https://twitter.com/JimIrsay/status/17753889839255554
if not the hospital
NO WAY, Joe, they will just point his foot back the right direction and stick some duct tape on it.
I made some awesome crab soup today. GF’s mother said it’s the best she ever had (she grew up in Baltimore). Now I’m about to go out to dinner.
Oh shit….who ded on the field?
I love regional dialects, like how in the South, taking your monthly bath is “making awesome crab soup.” Delightful!
Well it is Florida.
Allen Hurns, low leg/ankle snap to the outside 🙁
Home made risotto doesn’t suck.
They’re taking him straight to the funeral home.
Joe Buck just rhymed “foot” with “boot” and Canadians love him now.
Was looking away, but that’s probably good. At least not life threatening, although still sucks 🙁
Don’t rewind.
The foot was looking away too.
Even Doctors Kevin Ware and Joe Theismann didn’t like the look of that injury.
Fuck. How is this not done yet?
https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js
bravo!
they should try out for RuPauls drag race
Troy looks like El Debarge
Joe looks like Zack from “Saved by the Bell” found mom’s makeup kit.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YvAYIJSSZY
We gonna get a Charles Rogers Memorial Broken Clavicle here too?
Can we get Hurns some Bud Light or a Pepsi?
Boeing is located in Seattle.
Oh there’s a cart on the field in Dallas?
The part that cracks me up is the dude bailing out in the passenger seat.
if only was Jerry’s hearse
That’s pretty good that they’re not going to show it again. That was brutal.
–Bizzaro Twitter
Allen Hurns is fucking dead. RIP, Allen Hurns.
cowboy receivers made of peanut brittle tonight
Ok, everyone’s okay with Quantum Leap leaving it at Sam never getting home, how about a Beavis and Butthead revival? Where they’re in their 40s?
I believe they tried that and it didn’t take.
I’d love a Beavis and Butthead revival, but I will say Mike Judge’s “Tales From The Tour Bus” is fucking phenomenal.
Confession: I still haven’t watched Unbreakable.
That doesn’t look good
His foot is pointing to magnetic North.
THe movie Singles was underrated.
Properly rated. Kyra Sedgwick is weird looking
ah will FIGHT yeeeewwww
yes, I basically am the Campbell Scott character. Just not good looking.
OH FUCK
DID NAWT NEED TO SEE THAT.
GAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
RIP shoulder
GROSS!! OMG!
Didn’t see…what was it?
Everything.
Ever see the opening to Jurassic Park?
Foot pointing the wrong way
Ew.
I was saying Hoo-urns