Speaking of the football, Man City dispatched Bournemouth earlier today. I’ve adopted the former team simply because I fell in love with Kevin De Bruyne (better known on this site as Kevin The Broom) while watching the Belgique national team play last summer. As a fan of the Giants and the Senators, I’m a bit perplexed sometimes when I see these footballers play in a competent fashion, because coaching and management are capable and on the same page. I have to tamp down my expectation of Kevin simply ramming it up the center of the opposing D.
Fallout:
-Jimmy G came thru (14-20, 188 yds, 1td, no int’s) thereby calming the nerves of his teammates, the organization, the city, the fans and his mom.
-Lamar Miller fell down and didn’t get back up again. The Texans have Duke Johnson but not much else. His career rush avg. is 4.3 yds and his reception number comes in at 9.2 but he’s never been thought of as a go-to rb, but maybe? (he does seem a bit light at 210 though)
-Speculation this morning was that AP would be traded for, which in turn would speed up Derrius Guice’s inevitable ascension to the #1 rb role for the Potato Skins. (which Peterson would not have taken well)
-Of course the biggest news was Mr. Luck sucker-punching the Colts franchise and fan base. (only in the sense that no one saw it coming) After a bit of reflection, this seems like an intelligent response to 4 years of injuries and rehab and injuries and rehab. Gronk was in the same spot and did the same thing. How many times have we seen players try to fight thru pain and end up re-injuring themselves or incurring another, altogether new ouchie?
My prediction? He’ll be back in two years (he’ll only be 31) and will tear the league apart. I said the same thing regarding the early retirements of Megatron and Patrick Willis but I’m going to be right this time, dammit! TO THE GAME!
Steelers/Titans:
Fantasy-wise, everyone is going goo-goo over JuJu and the number of added targets he’ll get but I think the value lies with a certain Mr. Donte Moncrief. Which Derrick Henry shows up this year? The one that I kicked to the curb in week 10 or the one that went on a tear the last four weeks of the season?
Hey, gimme all you got.
Nah, man. I’m good to drive. Swear!
Maintain. Maintain. Maintain …
Those are two American heroes. Thanks for posting this.
My favorite reply gif to Aikman torching Gottlieb
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R0uWF-37DAM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XbQ08Ixczvo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KvkfyYoLjho
She seems nice.
Yeah, I’d fight a terminator for that.
DAMMIT JER YOU BEAT ME TO THE PUNCHLINE!!!!!!
Sorry man, didn’t mean to step on the joke.
LOL, no worries….you made it better.
Finally had to break down and become a Facebook person for my music. Got some videos from gigs posted on here. https://www.facebook.com/Jereme-Wheeler-Music-333618804169102/videos/
Well we’ve got another for the DFO Jug Band. (Nobody actually plays on jugs. Yet.)
I’m sure you can pick us up one in Williamsburg. And if not, our drummer can probably find one in Asheville.
/is willing to play with jugs
Oh wait, you meant…. never mind
Some people might disagree, however.
Troy Aikman is having none of Doug Gottlieb’s bullshit, you guys.
Troy Aikman
@TroyAikman
That’s total bullshit Doug. What qualifies you to decide how someone should live their life? So you’re now the authority on what motivates Andrew Luck? And if his decisions don’t fit into what you think is best for him then you rip him? Guess that keeps you employed on FS1. Nice
Quote Tweet
Doug Gottlieb
@GottliebShow
· Aug 24
Retiring cause rehabbing is “too hard” is the most millennial thing ever #AndrewLuck
That actually makes me almost like Aikman a little. Never expected to say that.
Yeah. Holy shit. That’s incredible. He’s right and everyone criticizing Luck or any other player for making a similar decision can get fucked to death.
Joe Buck’s turn on Brockmire reduced my hatred of him quite a bit too, but I bet it will all come flooding back in a week or two.
Nah. Because it was fictional and completely devoid of authenticity. He’s a piece of shit and always will be.
Why is he a “piece of shit?”
Throw another log on the fire, boys, David Koch is coming to stay…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUd_t_QeSqw
How about we throw another Koch on the fire? They do make their fortune off wood products, after all.
Sorry Clots fans.
That should be a band name.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6LOxHbSOBCA&ab_channel=TheLamaJon
My wife is watching ‘A Star Is Born’ and really likes it and I don’t have the heart to tell her how it ends.
I’m hoping she falls asleep.
Get her a recliner!
He should sell sofas. He could be Sofa King rich!
You think she’s not into a quick full frontal shot of Lady Gaga?
I forgot there was a preseason game tonight and I flipped over to it and it took me less than 2 minutes to realize I still loathe Collinsworth.
All through the third quarter he was talking about how much he likes you. You should call him.
Oh I don’t have to. Fucker calls all the time; about the weather, what show he just watched, if I liked his sweater vest. Just on and on. It’s exhausting.
My Collinsworth loathing doesn’t need any reminders.
I’ve already had a lot of gin, plan to have more, and still have work to do tonight. This should go well.
Oooh, Gin. Good idea.
My son just turned 21 and the only alcohol he likes is gin-and-tonic.
Fucking weirdo.
Is it at least good gin? Or does he just like tonic?
I don’t like gin, but I did the research and set him up with Hendrick’s and Bombay. He bought something called Monkey 47 that was, uh, interesting. And expensive.
As long as he stays away from the cheap shit he’ll be fine.
Monkey 47 is REAL fucking expensive. Good taste though.
Good to know. As of tomorrow he’s paying rent.
It’s well past time for me to grab some Suzuki-gun gear. That’ll be a good irresponsible purchase on my birthday.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VyU7xgL246o
A lot of moments of the Trump presidency have dug their way into my brain like ticks draining my chi, but knowing he has repeatedly asked about stopping hurricanes with nuclear weapons is probably going to be the one that bursts into my mind in my final moments. “Folks, we’re gonna nuke the hurricane! More and more people are talking about nuking hurricanes!”
Hey, but he’s trying different approaches! No other president would do things like this! He’s telling it like it is! We’re all gonna die!
Someone pointed out nuking the weather was a plot point in Sharknado 3 in which Trump turned down a role to play the president so he could… run for president.
He thought it was a documentary.
Well, there’s something I never thought Trent would live to see.
Neither did he.
Stupid Trent, getting clean and settling down.
These motherfuckers are all crazy. Rutten has talked about how they’d throw palm strikes at each other until their palms turned black.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7rRz81lCS3I
And of course, these are always fun
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mosX7L25HV8
“Everyone always underestimates the kick to the groin.”
Who? Who is underestimating the kick to the groin?
Bas used to throw that palm strike like a right hook and just fucking crush people. That is a bad, bad dude.
Big Daddy Drew described Mike Vrabel as someone “who looks like he just drank a twelve pack of of Budweiser for breakfast.” That’s scarily accurate.
Seems like every day on Twitter, there’s another video of Jushin Thunder Liger giving a farewell in his final match for a promotion. He’s set to retire for real on January 4 after NJPW’s Tokyo Dome show at 55 years old, 36 years after his first match. It’s always crazy to me how Japanese wrestlers seem to go forever, despite typically performing a more stiff, demanding style of pro wrestling. Meanwhile, every North American promoter could be convicted of manslaughter at this point.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8l-KkMINTgE
Another fine example is Murder Grandpa, Minoru Suzuki. He founded Pancrase when shoot wrestling was still too fake for him. At 51, he’s still going full speed and has a title match coming up in NJPW.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xy9JcUpxRZI
To be fair, it’s a little easier to extend your career when there’s no drug testing. Those cats used to be juiced to the fucking gills.
David Koch may be first team, All Hell; Charles is a first-ballot Hall of Famer in Hell (AKA Goodell’s asshole).
My only regret about David’s death was that it wasn’t Charles.
“He finally went to my barber!”
Two jackasses and a scarecrow.
Check out the red man above BJ’s right arm trying to stifle a laugh like his life depends on it.
Oh! Oh! Take two:
They put the “special” in the Anglo-American Special Relationship
“The Perfect Eternal Jackass”
It’s like two village idiots recognizing each other.
I guarantee you that at least one “gentleman” did the pull my finger routine.
Special Cultural Advisor to the PM Dennis Duffy:
Wait. Biarritz? What did the Basques do to France to deserve hosting these two pieces of shit?
LOL
I am PUMPED for work tomorrow.
That’s a still from one of the greatest movies ever made, Playtime (1967) by French filmmaker Jacques Tati. It has an entire Modernist urban center that is entirely a purpose-built movie set. It was shot in 70mm and was meant to be seen only on a gigantic movie screen, because there is so much going on in each frame.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrYB8hgyq4s
Double Anal Fisting?
Methinks Yinzers are trying harder than the Tits. If not, looks like a very dicey autumn for Puerto Rico’s most suave, eligible bachelor.
Spidey needs MOAR FIBER in his diet ,, smh
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FLbyNNWzMzI
That’s fucking funny
I recorded and later watched Bournemouth vs Man City. One of those teams was better than the other and it wasn’t my Cherries. FUCK those guys are good.
they are NOT fun to play when pissed off.
I was happy just to gain possession. Our free kick goal was fucking badass though. We played solid just seriously outclassed.
yeah, very respectable showing. Never hid.
That Aguero kid is fucking insane. Glad we got Harry Wilson onboard though.
Death by Snu Snu?
Get a load of these clowns.
Congressional delegation on a “fact-finding” trip.
He “threw a lollipop?” The fuck? Since when is a lollipop an aerodynamic item?
Anything is aerodynamic with enough force behind it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ShCRN3tFy80
whooooooa, Tanny Fanny!!
My bullshit tall 12 year old just put on his new school shoes and it’s the first time I’ve ever been shorter than him and seriously considering kicking him out of the house
Gratliff Reacts Reasonably 😀
12 y, 1 mo old, 5’9″, 180 lbs and <0 interest in sports. This motherfucker NEEDS to learn zone blocking schemes.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VCdJyOAQYM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I6VjNmyv_i4
JuJu Bee is gonna catch like, every pass.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dUh1DSIsUOY
SAFETY DANCE
Shazier has a cool 70s pimp strut now. When life gives you lemons, amirite?
also, nobody will ever again ask him to help them move!
/I use this with my PeyPey neck, is really nice
Forgive if this joke has been made already, but are these temporary Titans jerseys, or perhaps picked up at a supply shop? Those numbers look added on with plumber’s tape.
Oooooh? Ryan Shazier’s Magic Legs for FF name??
I can at least enjoy the fruits of EEEEEVIL! a bit, since my DFO side has both JuJu Bee and the P*ts D/ST.
Work FFL went ok. I got crap for RBs
I don’t quite know where’s Waldo, but I’m confident he’s dead.
I’ve sent invites. The comp is up!
https://mobile.footytips.com.au/competitions/?competitionId=575837
This is an NFL Tipping competition open to all DFOers! It’s free and there will be a prize for the winner.
Rules:
Pick each team straight up.
Pick one game’s winning margin each week.
If you forget to put in the tips, you score the lowest score of the round (no default to away teams)
Two bonus points for getting all the tips correct!
With AFL, EPL, now NFL are we just going to move the clubhouse to Australia?
NBA?
it would be just you and Ian
Yup!
One correction: AP prefers being nicknamed AD (for all day):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H28Pv_18KK8
“How long can you smash a tree branch against your tiny son’s testicles?”
well, I call him Purple Balls Jeebus. He can eat shit if he no likey.
I learned two things while reading my wife’s People magazine in the bathroom.
1) Krysten Ritter just had a kid with the lead singer from The War On Drugs. Good for them (especially him).
2) Both Alanis Morissette and Milla Jovovich also just had kids, and both are in their 40s. That’s not really the news; the news is that Alanis already had a son, and Milla already had a daughter, and both of these kids are named Ever. Apparently, not only is Ever a name, but it works equally well for boys and girls.
This has been “Things You Learn Whilst Crapping.”
That TWOD couple is as cool as it gets.
Post-partum depression might be the last chance I’ve got to get with Krysten Ritter.
The NFL Tipping Pool I mentioned in the earlier thread only does straight up picks with one game chosen each week in which you must pick the winning margin.
Are y’all still interested?
sure!
You know I am in.
YES! WHAT WAS THE QUESTION!?
My last bet of the weekend FINALLY paid off. Oriente Petroleo got a 3-2 win on a stoppage time penno. $25 bet at +875-ish
Hippo loves Oriente Petroleo as much as Roberto Arte does.
The Baltimore Orioles won today, 8-3 vs TB. 43 wins and counting, baby!!!!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L09qnRfZY-k
Only need nine more to match what a team of replacement-level players would get!
I got teh JuJu Bee in DFO league, had 10/15 picks and went with him and Kelce.
Yahoo gave me a B+ because it busted my “reach” pick of Duke Johnson in the 5th (after Horny Fourny and Josh Jacobs). But the AI mechanism still had him as the CLE 3rd-stringer, not the HOU starter. Dumb robots.
I got a C+. That’s what I get for showing up 15 minutes late.
I have been drunk on vacation for 5 days and totally gapped out.
I was at Gotham Hall. There was no Batman, and I am personally offended.
How’d you get 10 and 15? Trade?
nah, in a 12-team snake, that’s whut ya gets. 10th, then 15th. 4 picks in-between is a nice rhythm on that end.
#BFIB sweeping, Bastard Man Small Bears on the verge of being swept at home. HIPPO APPROVE!
Damnit, when I heard of “Kevin the Broom” I thought it was curling season again.
Damn right there’s curling!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FBw4_sZwxPo
The thing that kills me about that curling video is that way back in the day, Canadian sports announcers would talk over each other constantly if they got excited. It was fucking hilarious.
If these CNN Town Halls aren’t really back-to-back interventions trying to convince Gov. Bullock and Mayor de Blasio to give up their no-chance-in-Hell Presidential campaigns and run for US Senate so the Dems can get over 60 votes, they are wasting everyone’s time.
Well as funny as it would be to see DeBlasio try to primary Schumer or Gillibrand it wouldn’t accomplish much for the Democrats.
It’s a shame this is from The Onion.
Related: https://www.theonion.com/mta-reminds-new-yorkers-they-can-fucking-walk-1822734848
The “make Bullock run for Senate” play has been made, and made HARD. Otherwise, we’re running a black, immigrant mayor. Who seems like a really cool dude and all, but it’s still MONTANA.
Do people just see “Bullock” and “Montana” and think that he’s Seth Bullock/Timothy Olyphant?
The only reason de Blasio is mayor is because one term they had the chair of the MTA. I’m surprised that wasn’t 3 votes to 2. I voted for Jimmy Mcmillan that election!
Seriously considering writing in Madre Weaselo next time.