NFL Noise:
- It’s going to be pretty easy for the Patriots tomorrow night, now that the following players have been ruled out: Saquon Barkley (ankle), Sterling Shepard (concussion), Evan Engram (knee) and Wayne Gallman (concussion).
- The Giants are down to their third- and fourth-string running backs.
- At this point, the Giants are waiting on the end of the CFL season to try & bring in players.
- Brian Flores has hitched his cart to Josh Rosen for the rest of the season.
- “I like where Josh is and hopefully he just continues to improve over the course of today, tomorrow and over the course of the season,” Flores said.
- Speaking of staying with what’s already broken, new interim [Redacteds] head coach Bill Callahan has decided to go back to Case Keenum.
- Keenum missed last week with a foot injury, but is expected to be ready for Sunday.
- On the subject of quality decision making, former [Redacted] LaVar Arrington expounded on what’s wrong with the team.
Former [*Redacted] s LB @LavarArrington breaks down the real problem with the team
"The root of the issue is ownership… You had to address him as Mr. Snyder, even as an adult, and if you weren’t of a certain level or stature you were told not to look at the owner." pic.twitter.com/wdhcXKnvsK
— Speak (@SpeakOnFS1) October 7, 2019
Seems kinda obvious, but thanks for spelling it out.
Tonight’s TV:
- It’s Always Sunny” – 10:00PM ET – “Dee Day”
Tonight’s sports:
- NHL:
- Habs at Sabres – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
- Devils at Flyers – 7:30PM | NBCSN
- Kings at Canucks – 10:00PM | NBCSN / Sportsnet Pacific
- A tribute to the 50th anniversary season for the Canucks. The Kings were their first opponent. Here’s a link to the original radio broadcast from that night, for Canucks fans who miss Jim Robson.
- MLB:
- Game 5: Nationals at Dodgers – 8:30PM | TBS / Sportsnet1
- NCAA:
- Football:
- Appalachian State at Louisiana (Lafayette) – 8:00PM | ESPN2
- Women’s College Volleyball:
- Mississippi State at Alabama – 7:00PM | ESPNU
- Baylor at Iowa State – 9:00PM | ESPNU
- Football:
- Wrasslin’:
- AEW Dynamite – 8:00PM | TNT / TSN2
- NXT – 8:00PM | USA
I’ll see you guys Saturday night to discuss who gets what game on Sunday. Enjoy!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Quv21Vv4Rfk
[A thick cloud of smoke grows and a figure appears]
I have stumbled before you to say one thing.
Clutch made Dropkick Murphys look like post season Kershaw.
Meanwhile, Bryce Harper sits in Philly.
That former Red Sox Joe Kelly doomed the Dodgers just makes this all the sweeter.
He hasn’t taken a shot like that since Tyler Austin.
Clayton Kershaw’s therapist just cleared his calendar til March.
And he doesn’t even get to fuck Kate Upton…
I mean, he probably COULD…
If it turns out he is fucking her, I would start watching baseball
Also texted him to ask for Kelly’s number.
Kelly’s Irish, so his therapy consists of Jameson and woman-punching.
As God intended.
I think he’s a big Jesus guy. I would pay the Dodgers’ clubhouse staff a large sum of money to stick a sign saying “Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?” over his locker.
“You called?”
So, three straight years in playoffs and now you exit in the first round. Does this mean the end of the Dodgers as we know them?
Knowing LA, I’m thinking there will be massive changes for next year including new manager. Thoughts?
“Ok, I am ready to coach this team!!!”
From what I’ve heard, he already is…
He really should consult those who know the game better; get some aid-, uh, get some helpers.
I wish I had more +1s to give.
Bravo
I’d definitely be inclined to fire the manager who thought it was somehow a good idea to put Kershaw in for relief late in a post-season game.
Well, they didn’t lose in the World Series this year.
PROGRESS!
Somewhere, Frank McCourt is smiling.
Why? Did he repossess an old widow’s parking lot?
Excellent.
Insurmountable deficit?
Well then.
And the parking lots empty…
Nice to see an Angels’ player contributing.
Is this where they do the shootout?
No, that’s at Beverly and Rampart in a few hours.
Shout out to Original Tommy’s!
Greatest postgame meal ever. But not the safest parking lot in the tri-state area.
Fuck yeah!
Also, the shootout would most likely come out of my ass two hours later.
In L.A., if you’re really cool, you’d leave the stadium at the top of the tenth.
Well, they’ll be leaving now.
Now that’s good fortune-tellin’
MAS BEISBOL!
Good hit by Kike.
(it’s ok if you don’t put a ‘the’ in front of it smh)
Just saw a thing where Tyler Lockett is a virgin, saving himself for marriage.
You do you, I guess. (Actually, don’t. That would count.)
Hankook is the official tire of Major League Baseball.
Besides money was exchanged, what the fuck does that even mean?
Hank Ook?
Ernie Johnson looks like Steve Buscemi looks like John Waters looks like Don Knotts looks like Mick Jagger
Someone come over to my place and smash my balls and my brain with a sledgehammer for reading Twitter.
If you’re going to spend your evening with a bunch of Russian bots, you really should just get a couple of those Katya sex robots.
If there was a sexbot of her, I’d have already died of dehydration (if not AI-induced erotic asphyxiation).
The closest to Safe for Doors of the set. https://pixxxels.cc/gallery/2dx4fn9ui/ad50b980/
Holy shit, the Dodgers should just leave Kershaw off their post-season roster.
Playoff Kershaw in relief vs. Not Ready for Primetime Nats. SOMETHING’S GOTTA GIVE!
And it turns out it was Kershaw.
#Natitude!
Suzuki can now advance to first base on a stretcher.
.
Bah
methinks I will save “Dee Day” for tomorrow. Cheer me up after the terrible footy.
Stay away from the clams
– Anne Heche’s husband
This is the city: Los Angeles, California. I work here. I’m a cop.
Evening. Fast over.
Shalom.
Might be my favoUrite line ever in The Simpsons.
Gut Yontif.
Did you atone?
Slate clean.
/Chugs two beers
Slate partially clean
Interest rates a-falling, no worries though, it’s just in time to dump my life savings back into Jack-o-lanterns.
Just remember to sell your pumpkin futures before Halloween.
Still better than that kidney thing.
I can’t decide which opponent will best show off our solid, Midwestern values in the NLCS. A bunch of California hippies or them gubment bastards from Washington?
Probably Washington. Kershaw has a relatively strong following out here, plus they got rid of “that Pweeg guy”
Heh
https://www.twitch.tv/sashagrey
She looks very different.
Screw the NFL.
I’ll be watching ‘Cuse at NC State tomorrow night. For like ten minutes before ‘Cuse makes us their bitches.
Then I’ll drink heavily and take a nap.
Speaking of CONSTANCE WU AIN’T CARE apparently she bought a house in my neighborhood.
She seems like a peach. I’m sure the other people who depend on that show for their livelihoods were heartbroken that it got renewed and she wasn’t able to move on to yet bigger things
Yeah, it’s nuts that she would say something like that. She seriously DGAF.
I’m guessing you’re not going to get your ball back when it flies into Old Lady Wu’s yard.
I hope they kill off her character between seasons in the most humiliating way possible, like when Valerie Harper was written off her own comedy series in the 80s by her character having a stroke offscreen between seasons while yelling at some poor fuck at the supermarket about how a six-pack counts as six items in the 12 Items Or Less line.
I smell a prenup coming into play here?
I look forward to seeing your silver screen debut in Crazy Broke White Poker Players
I love this Jim Beam commercial where it talks about how he got his “friends” to help him build a distillery but cried poverty when it came time to pay them.
‘Murika!
It’s cheaper when its free
But they were raised “the right way”, so they were cool with it.
Lawyer Commenariat: Can I use “new job in a college” as a legitimate reason to postpone Federal jury duty, or will I still be SOL?
/Please be merciful, EDNY
“You want to delay your service to your country indefinately? I like the cut of your jib!”
-Your President
1) Write them and tell them that you’re deployed overseas at the moment and can’t leave the foxhole
OR, if that doesn’t work
2) Show up but wear a Che Guevara T-shirt (a Mao one would be even better)
OR, if that doesn’t work
3) Show up but wear a Trump T-shirt with an NRA pin and a Confederate flag belt buckle
OR, if that doesn’t work
4) Just ignore the summons like a good American. Jury duty is for saps.
5) Just tell them that despite the fact that obligations tie the country together, it doesn’t apply to you.
Really mess with them, wear a MAGA hat, a Che Guevara T-Shirt, and an AOC campaign button.
And camo jorts.
And conspicuously carry an L. Ron Hubbard book.
I’m not at all kidding when I say I’ve bounced people based on their reading material.
“52 years old and you’re working your way through ‘Harry Potter & The Goblet of Gin’? Fuck outta here.”
That reminds me of this.
“I’ve joined the Kurdish pesh merga, because someone from America has to pick up the slack.”
Or just pull a Nugent. No one would want to be on a jury with you.
It’s worth a shot. I’ve seen worse get by
Federal Courts don’t fuck around, so either show up the first day or contact the clerk prior to your appearance date. State courts in CT will let you come in early if there’s a conflict, or will let you delay it once for a conflict.
If you don’t mind showing up for one day then go as scheduled and make it clear to the parties that jury duty is a huge pain in the ass for you, (without, you know, being an asshole), and rest assured that no one is going to put you on the jury and risk the 50-50 shot that you take it out on their client.
Be prepared to get a stern look and some shitty comments from the judge about how jury duty inconveniences everyone but we all have to do our duty and what makes you so fucking special anyway? But they can’t make you stay so just stick to your guns. Best bet for you is to say its a new job and you’ll be worried about missing so much time so early and would be distracted and might miss something. “I’d really like to serve as a juror but worry that this really isn’t the right time for me or either of the parties here, your Honor.”
Written letter is in the mail, with supporting document of my appointment!
I would assume if you could postpone jury duty, the notice would have said how. Although I wouldn’t put it past them to hide that.
https://www.nyed.uscourts.gov/court-info/faq/JURY
Generally speaking, I think that’s a reasonable request to make to the clerk given those circumstances. I’m sure they’ve postponed people’s service for less.
When I was summoned here the first time I just asked to postpone it 90 days (the max) and didn’t even have to give an excuse. I ended up sitting in the pool two days, got called up for a voir dire, got bounced by the DA (funny enough, I tried to clerk for that same judge a few months later. I didn’t get it, but she remembered me. :-|) , and then because I had been selected – without having to be on a jury – my service was up. In New Mexico, we had to actually be empaneled or else we went back to the pool to wait until we were called or the ten days were up. I got bounced in voir dire there and then sat out the rest, but at least there were plenty of tables and the wifi was decent.
I forgot that the worst part of the colonoscopy process is the 24 hours of no solid food before the procedure. Wait, the worst part is no booze for the 24 hours preceding the procedure. Lack of food is only the second worst part.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YxGkU75eH-Y
The big question for tomorrow night is what the final margin will be.
A margin call somehow more devastating than what the Dukes suffered at the end of Trading Places.
With all those ineffectives, the Pats are gonna roll through the Giants like the Turks through the Kurds.
THESE KURDS I CALL THEM THE ARMENIAN DIASPORA BECAUSE THE TURKS ARE GOING TO TRY AND KILL THEM ALL AND DENY KNOWLEDGE OF THE WHOLE THING.
/Hey, I can make that joke.
Because there aren’t going to be any Kurds to complain about it.
Dale Tallon!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QYaewaC99_A
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NtDXWtZWsgo
Any word from Hippo’s rampaging boner?
Rex Grossman is jealous.
He went to the strip club to have that taken care of ‘The Right Way’
chuh fookin’ chuh!!!
I played goalie way back when-Dunc Wilson was in over his head and great at the same time.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8gY0GEoufk
Orland Kurtenbach!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jp-EQGW8M2M