It was mid-July and I got the bug again. Usually I never know when, specifically, it’ll hit but this one is a bit different. There’s only one chance to see friends you’ve made along the way and that’s in Britt, Iowa in the early part of August. I was almost sorry to give this gig up-it was one the best I’d ever had. It might even be better than that stint I had in California, oh, probably about eight years ago. Huh, I guess not. Back then I was a groundskeeper for some rich folks that weren’t around very much but their daughter was and she took a shine to me. She said she was eighteen and that was good enough for me. When she wasn’t with her buddies she would wander over to my little cottage on the far side of the property. That was a hell of a summer…
Still, as I said, this gig is just perfect. I was wandering through Farmington out Deleware way and heard about an old lady that had a small ranch and was looking for help. Miss Edna was a widower and was doing okay funds-wise but needed help with the horses. She couldn’t get around much anymore, riding was out of the question but as she said, “I’ve been around these beautiful creatures my entire life and I’m not going to stop because I’m a bit infirm”.
We worked out a deal-I got a little setup near the barn. A cozy place that was to my liking. The money was okay but I didn’t have anywhere to spend it so my bankroll was better than it had been in some time. Food was there for the taking and I had my own burner as well. I had as much or as little privacy as I wanted. Miss Edna wasn’t nosy except for when I was feeding and watering her ‘precious ones’. She always made it to the porch at the proper times and made sure as well to give me proper instructions. That and Sunday dinner where pretty much my only obligations. She was hurt when I told her I had to meet up with friends-“Are you coming back?”. I replied, “Uh, sure. I’ll just be away for a little bit, maybe get a kid in here for a few weeks”.
I figured it would take at least fourteen days or so to get out to Britt by train and by thumbing it. Rodeo Dave, Hatchet, Stumps, Fat Harry, Fireman-I looked forward to seeing them and so many others. I’d crossed paths with all of them over the fifteen years since I’d left Nancy. It’s not a perfect life but it’s better than working construction day after month after year. I think she figured it out shortly before I did. I’ve no doubt she wouldn’t have been surprised to see the note I’d left the day the itching got too intense to ignore.
There had to be at least 150 of us there at the grounds where the meetup took place. Plenty more observers too. I was hoping I could hook up again with Sidecar Sally. It was sort of a tradition we had going on five years now-a great way to get the weekend started. Thing is, I was told she slipped under the wheels of a cattle car last winter. Ah well, I imagine it didn’t hurt much, would’ve been over with right quick.
This being Friday, the highlight is the bonfire and the fiddle music which gets everyone in a good mood. Me and Pennsylvania Slim were jawing off to the side and I noticed a fella looking at us. There’s all sorts that show up here and seeing a new face was to be expected. Slim called him over and he had some whiskey on hand. He just wanted to be there when the stories started flowing and he brought just the thing to loosen our lips and memories.
Wasn’t long before Slim was telling the old yarn about sleeping with the wife of a switchyard boss back in Chicago in the late ’70’s. It never gets old. As the dark closed in around us I thought Slim’s voice was more slurred than it ought to have been but I wasn’t feeling that great myself. I wasn’t drunk, I was slow. Couldn’t think quick. Gotta get outta here. Gotta take a leak. I opened my eyes. Leaning against a tree. All the sounds. So far away. I heard, “You okay?”. Sharp pain in my side. Piss going everywhere. It took me forever to put my hand on my side. Warm. Sticky. Opened my eyes again. Stars. On my back. Hands on my throat. Strong. No stars anymore. The horses… Nancy…
TO THE GAME!
Vikes/Cowboys:
Wr Amari is listed as questionable but is expected to gut it out and why wouldn’t he? In the ten home games he’s played since the trade he’s gone for 10 six spots. The Vikes lockup secondary has disappeared this year and even Rhodes can be taken for a ride, never mind Hughes and Waynes. Their run D is still exemplary but you’re playing Zeke because you’re no fool.
Let’s keep it going.
Veterans joke….how many Vietnam vets does it take to change a light bulb?
YOU WOULDN’T KNOW MAN….YOU WEREN’T THERE!!!!
But I prefer soldiers who DON’T go missing. – Herr Fuhrer, Washington, DC
My 11th place fantasy team is totally going to move up to 10th with this performance from Rudolph
Same LG; different team:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GwjfUFyY6M
Just when I think this fucking watchmen show can’t get any fucking weirder….
Mister Winkles awakes…
Give it up for Founding Fathers!
Only about half of them didn’t have qualms about owning slaves!
LOSERS!! – Herr Fuhrer, Washington, DC
/speaking of the ones WITH qualms
You know, with Zeke and Cooper as established GODDAMN STARS, you don’t need to be paying DAK! He has PROCESSED HAM for a head!! Send him to Denver instead.
I feel like one day, he’s gonna just rip that hip out of its socket doing that
#IgglesFanFiction
How much would Chi**** offer him?
all the spongy pizza he can eat?? Also, Leonard Cohen will sing him to sleep each night.
No.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-PUW6y4F6c
Dak Prescott is good at the footy. As is Amari Cooper.
Cooper is having a night. Prescott wants his 40MM now.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iDC59HcYn0w
Hippo’s Opium Den is going to get a glowing weekly review from Yahoo’s robots!
Must be nice. All I can say is praise be to Lamar. He’s the only reason I still have a shot this week.
Fun fact: I know the cartoonist. He lives 5 minutes away from me. And I was buddies in high school with both of his sons.
That’s awesome! Tell him random internet stranger likes his work!
Hey now, you is an Imaginary Doktor. That is no small beer!
Fake news! Macduff lives in Macbeth!
TRUE HIPPO FACT! I read quite a bit, and always have. NEVAR cared for Shakespeare. Any of it.
Surprised to not see romeo and juliet in that collection. Plenty of deaths there
Currently writing report cards. This is the absolute worst part of the job. Anyone wanna come write ’em? I’ll pay you in booze and/or other intoxicants as desired.
I’m happy to grade/judge anyone, any place, any time.
I would pay virtually any sum to just copy/paste “YOU LITTLE FUCKS NEED TO PRACTISE YOUR GODDAMN INSTRUMENTS OR FACE THE CONSEQUENCES”. Because that’s basically what I’m doing for every single one, albeit in more polite language.
Deal
Hey, at least they bring their instruments. As opposed to my third graders last year, who didn’t. I’m pretty sure that kid never got one.
Sure, if you want to write up a couple of experiment designs for me
*restarts the SIS servers at 1 am to install a critical fix 5 days after marking period ends*
Every teacher in the district: FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK YOU
Oh hell yeah. Nothing’s more fun than roasting a bunch of kids.
Kids are so cute:
Just flunk ’em all. They probably did something to deserve it.
FLYERS WIN SECOND CONSECUTIVE SHOOTOUT WE ARE IN THE END TIMES
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EJDJ91OWkAIFqhM?format=jpg&name=small
Very clever trick of using a sure-thing review to show more commercials. Fuck you, NFL.
Cousins is going to fuck up here
And Diggs is going to rescue him.
Flyers to OT. As is tradition.
Tie Game
Done with NFL for the night. Time to find out if Runaway Jury still holds up
Apparently, someone archived only the Tawmmy articles. Better way to spend halftime than with Dungy.
http://quinzee2.rssing.com/chan-66793597/all_p2.html
FREE PLAY!
Jarwin all in me!
Evening all, I committed Andy Reid’s cardinal sin of not ordering too much barbecue. But it’s okay because Senorita Weaselo and I are definitely coming back for lunch when they aren’t on the cusp of running out of everything.
Andy’s lunch order:
It took us 3 seconds to review the play, why do the refs need 2 minutes. They should be allowed to review via Jumbotron without having to shut the whole fucking game down.
I think a few of you here are getting a healthy fine from the league office this week.
they better take imaginary dollars
Take my National Disgrace Bucks!
MOAR TV TIMEOUTS = MOAR COMMERCIALS = MOAR $$$$$
That was a fumble TD for PIT earlier today. Almost identical.
Were the refs just not watching the play or?
Probably.
To be fair, this might be part of the new mandate of “when in doubt, let the play continue.”
They don’t want to get roasted for blowing a play dead incorrectly again.
Instead they’re getting roasted for being incompetent assholes.
http://giphygifs.s3.amazonaws.com/media/12iW9uPnyR9bAk/giphy.gif
Kryzeqwski and Dak Prescott, a fitting duo, the two pantheons of under the table payments.
I had really hoped that by not watching either basketball or college sports, I would be able to avoid “Coach K.”
If Dick Vitale shows up, I’m done.
50% of players on the field Strongly Approve of that Gallup TD
Yeah!
GALLUP WOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Who’s off tomorrow?
I sure hope I am, cause I ain’t goin’ and I might be too drunk to even try.
I once called in as too drunk to come into work. My boss just laughed and told me he would see me the next day. I miss having a cool boss.
This guy.
I plan to honour veterans by giving maybe 1/4 of my usual half-assed effort.
Canada.
Not me. Kids are in school too
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K13hH0pJx5s
Dingleberry has made real Dingleberry throws. Non-Gendereds just ain’t making him pay.
Go go Founding Fathers!!
/reminder, Fronk wins Nickname of the Year
Won’t pretend to know enough about Bolivia to know who’s the villain in the coup that just took place (hunch says it’s “all parties involved”), but what I do know is having cops in full riot gear leading the celebration party is a very good, non-authoritarian look.
Jesus christ there are some takes happening
A CIA front invoking a socialist anti-imperialist.
The most American of all traditions
Fuck it
h
ttps://i.imgur.com/1tne8qw.jpg
Unexpected
Why was that hit on Cobb not a penalty for hit on a defenseless receiver? I ask not as a Dallas homer, but because I genuinely do not understand that rule.
The dice roll came up even, so no call.
Makes as much sense as anything else in the NFL.
Hockey shouldn’t be allowed to have producers
Dolly and Kenny duet so far so good watchmen
Hi, I am here, so Dallas is going to win. Adjust your bets accordingly.
Why in the hell are the Cowboys wearing their blue jerseys at home?
Its one of the constants of the NFL:
– The Patriots will cheat.
– Roger Goodell is evil.
– The Browns will Browns.
– The Cowboys only wear their blue jerseys on Thanksgivings or when forced to as the away team.