And all that work in the regular season to eliminate all those lousy teams except for the Eagles, smgdh. Hey, we’re here-let’s make the best of it.
TO THE GAME!
Bills/Texans:
-J.J. Watt is back! The usual recovery time from a torn pec is six months + (depending on severity of course) but he’s a Wonder Warrior and all that. I’m guessing he’s not in game shape but he’ll have an impact because Josh Allen reacts very slowly to collapsing pockets.
-There’ll be an interesting battle between wr Hopkins (68 of his catches have gone for a 1st down or a TD-that’s phenomenal!) and cb White, the Bills shutdown (over-used word but the guy hasn’t given up a TD the whole season) dude. So The Shaun will throw to the other side, right? Welp, it looks as though deepball fella Fuller’s continuing soft tissue ailments will cause him to miss out this week. So we’re looking at the very average Kenny Stills going up against Levi Wallace who, after a rough start to the year, has only given up 7 catches the last four weeks.
-Devin Singletary should have himself a game in this spot. He really underwhelmed the last 3 games he played in (he was supposed to help deliver me a champeenship) but I went back and had a look-they were vs. the Pats, Ravens and Steelers, all top 5 in defending the run. The Texans are in the bottom 5 in that category.
-Prediction Time! If Josh Allen keeps it to two turnovers or less the Bills win, more than that and things get dicey. I’ll say Bills 26 (that’s 2 scores and 4 field goals because multiple busted drives) Texans 20.
Now it’s your turn. Tell me how you think the game will unfold.
goddamnit, Brokeback.
SUDDEN ALLEN!
Oh singletary/will you marry/my name is Larry/And I’m not hairy/so don’t be scary
This just in. Coughing with an abdominal binder holding your guts together sucks.
So does laughing, but I can’t quit you guys.
yeah, we mean it metaphorically when we hope the drugs help ya bust a gut!
Having your guts on the inside of your body is underrated
And down under, shit is also going nicely
Like us, they get the government they deserve: https://www.bbc.com/news/world-australia-50979169
don’t blame me, I voted SNP!
With regards to “hating America” it’s more like being a teenager who is terribly disappointed and embarrassed by the actions of their racist, alcoholic, misogynist father and really, really hopes Dad can get his shit together, but knows better than to get their hopes up.
Oh good, people are reacting logically: https://www.bbc.com/news/world-middle-east-50995792
Because reigniting an insurgency that lasted a good ten years is totally a brilliant and sensible idea. I mean it’s not like everyone just up and forgot how to insurge as soon as things cooled off.
Just to be clear, not endorsing this shit, amazed at how boneheaded our leaders can be. Not amazed, shockingly pissed.
I gotcha.
And especially when you do it on a foreign soil, against another state’s actual fucking military personnel, that’s been invited there by the government of said country, so it can unfuck a situation you fucked up in the first place… and then bragging about it to the media…
The irony is, if let’s say a Russian strike in Syria takes out an American general (or even just a head-honcho of a PMC), the USA would be screaming bloody murder and rattling its sabres like they’re all held by Michael J Fox
That last sentence is pure fucking gold.
Fuck it.
It was an impressive twofer, pissing off two countries where we were enjoying a local maximum in relations when Trump took office
$20 seats: https://www.xfl.com/en-US/teams/washington-dc
“So Glad We’re Exempted From This War!”
-The San Antonio Bone Spurs
Singletary is a fucking player.
He doesn’t tarry!
deffo a word we should be using MOAR
My brother-in-law gave us a new sous vide attachment for the instapot for Xmas. I am looking forward to trying it out on some tri-tip.
Milano and Murphey? Sounds like a delicious beer/cookie combo!
Or a craft Stout
Somebody make this.
My bro in law and I are getting shitfaced and then going to an XFL game in DC.
Have fun and don’t be a bama!
let the principles of teh bourble guide thee, my son
On alcohol? I feel like the proper drug for that would be ecstasy.
what an athletic play by #93!
My wife just called about something including stuff about some chore but all i heard was that wah wah sound from the Charlie Brown cartoons
So are we at war yet? Asking for a friend.
ish?
Ish? Afghanistan can enlist! And Gulf War III can enlist (with a parental consent) in the Royal Army..
When have we *not* been at war since 2001?
*1941
Funny enough, you lot have been in peace for less than 20 combined years of yer existence, lol.
https://www.globalresearch.ca/america-has-been-at-war-93-of-the-time-222-out-of-239-years-since-1776/5565946
If that.
I don’t understand how anybody can watch Josh Allen play and think he’s is good. I mean he’s a great athlete but he’s a running back, not a QB
He’s like a white Jameis who doesn’t rape people.
That not raping people part is KEY
Really is something one ought look for in a key employee…
He also doesn’t like king crab legs.
Except that he actually graduated from Maturity School on time.
AND A RECEIVER!
Not bad for a running back
JJ Watt = JJ Volt drinking an AMP energy drink
I was told there would be no science puns
Ohm you have got to be kidding me.
Brokeback, keeping it interesante out thar
DAMN YOU SAPPY ESPN COMMERCIAL FOR GIVING ME CHILLS
THIS OVERTURNING PI’S, I CALL IT MY FIRST GIRLFRIEND BECAUSE IT’S NOTHING BUT A TEASE THAT DOESN’T EVER PAN OUT
every time a play goes to Frank Gore, a puppy dies
As opposed to plays going to Michael Vick, in which case it was adult dogs.
/I’m going to dog hell for that, aren’t I?
nah, but we’s likely all going for other reasons
/PACK SUNSCREEN
Eh, all the cool people are in hell
Yeah, but not dog hell. The only ones there are Hitler’s dog, Checkers, and the mean Lassie that mauled Timmy.
So local sportscaster here tweeted out about Bills not being a good team. “Bill Mafia” tweeted back insults about his mother, who is suffering from Alzheimers. Keep it classy, you fuck sticks.
Almost as classy as the douchbags who purposely gave an epileptic a seizure with a flashing tweet!
Who did that? Because they should get cancer of the ass
https://www.cnn.com/2017/03/17/us/twitter-journalist-strobe-epilepsy/index.html
Considering how hungry I am, and how inoffensive the ingredients are, this kimchi-rice-roast-pork bowl I made is surprisingly bad.
Hey you buncha shaved apes, guess who’s here?
Ook!
-A Certain Librarian
Underrated cut
– Andy Reid, referring to an eye of round he just picked up from the butcher
Is it Dave Chappelle? I love that guy
Ah, the playoffs. The one time of the year when all humans can come together, regardless of color or creed, gather in one place, lift a glass, and declare our hatred for the Patriots.
Here’s to the booze in the glass,
Here’s to the ref with the sass,
Here’s to the Patriot’s one and out,
And Brady’s incomplete pass
My balls want to say Pats by a million, but my heart and brain both say “Gut-wrenching fumble or pick-six late in the 4th.. Before the 2 minute warning, though”
No, that’s what would happen if it were the Chiefs.
GO PATS and if you don’t feel the same ,YOU HATE AMERICA!!! Why do you hate America, RTD?
We don’t have that kind of time to explain it all.
Were any PI challenges overturned all season?
Like 2? Where’s GTD?
I reminisce fondly Josh Allen’s time in Wyoming. GAMBLOR BE PRAISED.
Wyoming isn’t real. Nice simulation work though
Zymm I even stopped and took a pic by the Welcome sign for ya a few years ago. It’s real, not a lot of folks though!
Oh, I’ve driven through “Wyoming”
Like I said, beautiful simulated landscape
It’s nice to see the effort some people put into hiding their secret facilities!
HAIL!!!!
I too often stop to ask myself “Why Yao Ming?”
Trivia Time: Who scored the first TD of the Decade?
Noted abolitionist John Brown.
Quite the body on that guy, they say.
His truth is marching on.
Ah, that old cliche where the dead offense suddenly comes to life just in time for the elite defense to become hot fucking trash
Watching the replay there, I’m 100% sure Brady would have dropped that.
So am I, unfortunately for me.
JOSH ALLEN KICKLINE
https://giphy.com/gifs/nfl-allen-buffalo-bills-josh-3McruKxflKTnKT7P8Q
https://giphy.com/gifs/nfl-allen-buffalo-bills-josh-3McruKxflKTnKT7P8Q
https://giphy.com/gifs/nfl-allen-buffalo-bills-josh-3McruKxflKTnKT7P8Q
Is Rev’s bloodflow ok?
Rev’s dead, but not before he busted the biggest nut the world’s ever seen.
Somebody get me a cigarette. And some advil. May have pulled something
“Oh, did you make the same New Year’s resolution that I did? Stay strong, brother.” – Colin Cowherd
THESE HOUSTON TEXANS, I CALL THEM THE DALLAS COWBOYS BECAUSE, HONESTLY, TEXAS IS COWBOYS COUNTRY.
And we learned Brokeback QB was a Reedley Fucking Tiger!
That was pretty impressive.
Le especial de Philly?
A FUCKING WILDCAT!!!!!
Bleeding Kansas TOUCHED DOWN…pass??
Does that count for Sharkbait’s prop bet?
BILLY SPECIAL
Afternoon, folks. Is Josh Allen… good?
Right now, the evidence is pointing to YES.
ESPN opting to stick with Charlie Daniels while sexy ass blondes sing for SNF.
Why not?
I made some terrible pho so now I’m just cutting up some leftover hillshire farms box cheeese and sausages as I prepare for this HOU/BUF matchup.
Also, isn’t the nfl postseason like the most straight chalk tournament in sports?
Not this year with the Patriots at #3.
Howdy.
I think I have a high-ankle sprain.
How hilarious is Dallas interviewing Marvin Lewis and Mike McCarthy? HE IS FUCKING CRAZY!
Why would Marvin Lewis do that to himself?!
Those boner pill mail order docs need to send ya some v-profen
JOSH ALLEN IS GOING TO LIVE FOREVER
https://youtube.com/watch?v=c2J-u7bX5ro
ESPN: Discipline expected into Patriots videotaping Bengals in two weeks.
This is somehow going to end with the Bengals being punished, isn’t it?
Isn’t living in Cincinnati enough?
Janay Rice apologizes for the P*ts videotaping.
/son walks in the door after skiing
Me: “Did you fall on your bum today?”
Him: “No, but I did fall on my face.”
/he’s got some serious face rash/black eye action going on
That’s a tremendous banner image. Well fucking done.
Totally underrated movie
Yeah, I think it just freaked people out, ’cause Keanu actually showed (some) emotion in it and people were just not prepared 😀
(hears “All Night Long” play to open a 4:00 PM game)
Unless this is going to be a Quadruple Overtime game, someone needs to be fired.
Lionel Ritchie or
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XdknZ-Otj_U
Lionel Richie’s song, but not Lionel Richie singing.
So .. .doubly-awful … Wanna borrow my pitchfork? 😀
Nah, I just spent a long drive this morning listening to people defend Trump’s war crime/terrorist attack.
Let’s hope that it does!
When I checked the game times this morning I saw 1:35 pm and assumed that was Eastern time. Behold my surprise when 10:35 am rolled around and it was still 3 hours to game time. I totally could have gone out and done stuff, but who are we kidding, there’s no way I was going to put pants on and leave the house
You only put on pants to leave the country, everyone knows that!
I’m seriously considering a new series of posts in the coming year where Dok goes from place to place on assassination missions as a secret agent. It’s a heady stew of Jason Bourne, 007, and Scotchy’s hobo killer.