Sexy Friday, Skanks for the Memories

I’m curious if any of you remember Bob Hope. There’s a reason the Burbank airport is named after him, you know. Bob Hope was a great all-around entertainer. He sang, he danced, he was a comedian, he could play the straight man. He was part of a great duo with Bing Crosby in the “On The Road” movies and he also had great success in movies on his own.

I was introduced to Bob Hope and his movies/comedy by my grandmother on my dad’s side. She greatly enjoyed his movies, even if they were dubbed or subtitled in Spanish. The comedy and the funny still shone through.

This week, I am reminded of him because of one of the songs that became his calling card: “Thanks for the Memory”. It was originally sung in the movie “The Big Broadcast of 1938”.

It’s a wonderful song that’s appropriate for many occasions. When he sang it, he changed the lyrics to suit the situation, like seeing an ex or an old friend after many years or dedicating the song to a loved one that’s passed away.

I think you know where I’m going with that. Here’s the song from the movie, for your enjoyment:

Of course, this being me, I can’t just leave well enough alone with something sentimental.

I don’t know how many of you know of Dave Attell and his comedy. Simply put, he’s one of the funniest comedians, to me, that I’ve ever seen/heard. Some of us elder folk around this site have quoted him or paraphrased his jokes frequently.

He did a comedy album named “Skanks for the Memories”, a play on Bob Hope’s song. The entire album is brilliant. I bought it on CD and if it was vinyl, I would have worn out the grooves by now.

/Millenials wonder what the fuck I’m talking about.

Here’s a playlist that someone uploaded to YouTube that has the whole album:

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=OLAK5uy_kbKcT0yzaaGQrcWCH1A8B2eHww_S-R5sg

If you want to laugh your ass off, I suggest you hit play.

***

Sprots News

The AFL announced that Aussie Rules will resume games starting on June 11. Those of you that are International Members have the Watch AFL package with your membership and can watch through their app.

If you’re not a member, you can still get the Watch AFL app and catch every game. Most games are on the weekends going from the evening to the early morning in North America.

***

I’m not tWBS, so you’re not going to get a happy message or some motivational words. You’ll get some dirty dirty girls and you’ll like it. Without further ado, here are this week’s Tik Tok girls (or Tik Tok skanks as someone referred to them last time. I think that’s a bit harsh, but your opinion is just as valid as mine). Enjoy:

That’s pretty impressive.
Umm, you know you’re…ok, never mind.
Pictured: a man farting.
Here, lemme get that sand for you…
Clearly a virgin.
Remember how fun Slip n Slides were?
Good doggie!
I dunno. Her face is pretty cute too.
Pretty palms!
Exercise is important!
I really enjoy outdoor beach showers.
I have no idea what “#spacethings” is supposed to refer to.
That’s a beautifully-composed shot.
Butts are my happy place too.
Time for a beer!

***

And now, a new feature!

I’ve decided that I must take up the mantle that tWBS ran with and help to make this world a better place. I will do this in the one way he couldn’t: By introducing you to good music!

My aim each week will be to showcase a tune or band from the 80s (the best decade EVAR!) that not many people know about or have heard of. In this way, hopefully these artists will find new audiences and the old audiences can reminisce about what they were doing in the 80s.

The first song today is by a band named after a Jello-like dessert. Without the rapey spokesperson.

I speak, of course, of Blancmange. They were a duo from London that released their first album in 1982. I was in middle school then and I was fully embracing the new wave sounds coming from the UK. The first song that was played on the radio (KROQ here in LA and a handful of stations around North America that played new wave back then) was “Living On The Ceiling”.

That song married Middle-Eastern sounds with modern synths and a danceable beat to create something not really heard before. Here it is, for your enjoyment. Ten points to whoever can spot Ron Jeremy playing the North African bagpipes!

Blancmange – Living on the Ceiling

It was their follow-up that was released in 1983 that really defined what the 80s were to me: Weird and cool. It was not only acceptable, but expected for things to be weird and new in order to be considered cool.

Think of it as a Moose gif. It’s weird and you’ve never seen it before and it’s cool all at the same time and that’s why it works. It can’t just be weird or new, it needs to be cool too. But it could never be cool without being weird. Does that make sense?

From the very beginning of this song, you can tell this is something different. The video’s visuals only reinforced this.

Blancmange – Blind Vision

I invite you to imagine a Young Balls in a dark middle school gym dancing with a cute girl while “Blind Vision” played. Those were great days indeed.

The band had another big US hit with “Don’t Tell Me”, but I found that one too “poppy” for my tastes, so I won’t link to it here. I do invite you to check out the band on YouTube and see if there are any other songs Blancmange created that you might like.

***

That’s all for this week, folks! Be good to each other and try to maintain the social distancing so that cases/deaths don’t spike and the easing of regulations doesn’t stop. See you next week!

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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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SonOfSpam

Pictured: 2020 and humanity

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Nope; this guy is taking it.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook

Speaking of Bob Hope . . .

Dave Thomas did the most killer imitation of Bob Hope on SCTV. There were a couple of different versions but this one is the greatest, because it is played so straight:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BJDK71B6xI8

Brick Meathook
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
SonOfSpam

“I’ve dumped a flaming slag too”

– M. Pence

Brick Meathook

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yeah right

I ….
Hate this world for where we’re at.
I the lack of leadership that’s holding us back.
I hate the blind eye that’s never left.
I hate the bullshit coming lacking in depth.
I hate the fact that black lives don’t matter.
I hate that we’re all Twitter fodder.
I hate that a white man can murder a black.
I hate that we don’t have a real leader.
I hate the that we’ve got a wheeler and dealer.

I shouldn’t hate Mr. “President”.

Exit on the left.

yeah right

No man should ever “hate”.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook

ha ha Canadians can’t even vote. Joke’s on them.

SonOfSpam

Yeah, but no man should be Donald Trump either.

ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
ALXMAC
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Let’s go retro.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ThurberHerder

Goose Island? GNP?

ALXMAC
ALXMAC
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ALXMAC
Brocky

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Fuck this week

Col. Duke LaCross

That’s a lot of butts.

Mr. Ayo

— J. Cutler’s maid

ALXMAC
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Also; Happy Fucking Friday in spite of it all.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The other thing that is on HBO is the Natalie Wood doc., I’m even more convinced Wagner was involved and covered it up; no evidence, but, it’s just too much.

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Horatio Cornblower

What kind of wood doesn’t float?

Natalie Wood.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Where is you Sharon Tate joke?

Brocky

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brocky

https://streamable.com/5hwi

Warning, this contains the dreaded phenomenon known as “sound”

Mr. Ayo
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brocky

So have Margot and Jaime Presley always looked alike or am I just now noticing?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Sorta I guess, but in my mind Margo is several points higher, but I see what you mean.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Of course I’m splitting waxed pubes here.

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Brocky

Oh definitely.

But I legitimately did a double take
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Interesting; side by side you can really see the differences. Hair and make-up make them look more similar than they really are. Eye witness testimony sucks.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Also, how they put on the mask of planned behavior for the red carpet ride. The Stepford Wives look.

Mr. Ayo

I’ve always noticed it since My Name is Earl

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Back in the day amphetamines were commonly prescribed.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

The officer arrested is going to use the defense he was doing a yoga pose called the downward pig.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

I just watched George Floyd’s hard-core porn he filmed a couple of years ago. Even in degrading, cream pie teeming porn people know not to use someone’s neck as a yoga mat. But you can use someone’s lower back as a landing area.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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