[turns BEST BRA EVER! admercial off]
It’s almost too much football, isn’t it? Kidding! No, it is not. TO THE GAMES!!!
Jets/Bills:
Did the Vikes front office giggle a bit when they traded the league’s best downfield wr (% of passes caught 20+ yards from LOS) to the Bills so that he could be paired with the league’s worst downfield passer? Probably. Singletary’s usage last year befuddled me-a dynamic, breakaway type back, he was used behind Gore when the latter was clearly fading. Now Zack Moss is the apple of McDermott’s and Daboll’s eyeballs. It seems that this coaching staff is in ‘Back To the 80’s!’ mode.
Fins/Pats:
I’m forced to cheer for a Pats player because I want to see Cam do well. Please shoot me.
Browns/Ravens:
So many offensive weapons on the field in this game. Should be a fun game to watch and yes, that is the first time that word has ever been uttered in the context of these two cities. Sure it’s an easy joke but… I’ve got nothing.
Colts/Jags:
Lots of debate among conservative fantasy players as to whether or not one should start Taylor. Look, the Jags have one of the worst run D’s in the league-both Mack and Taylor will have about 15 carries and a score by game’s end.
Eagles/Team:
Sanders is a goner so play Boston Scott if ya gotta. One concern is that Team has a very impressive D-line now. As always (it seems) Philly’s wr’s are nicked up-play DeSean before he joins the wounded.
Bears/Lions:
Golladay tweaked his hammy and didn’t practice on Friday. The Lions would be stupid to play him, so he’s a go? Pivot over to Hockenson, he’s my candidate for 2nd year breakout tight end.
Pack/Vikes:
Dalvin got paid! Anyway… That Minny D that one could always count on to force the issue has only 5 returning players from 2019 playing today. Reportedly, A.J. Dillon’s thighs are in action this afternoon. The fellas on the Sirius fantasy channel were gushing like schoolgirls at a K-pop concert the day the photos came out. [rolls eyes]
‘Hawks/Falcons:
Gotta love the combo of Matty Ice/his receiving options and the lousy Atlanta D. Perhaps his first 5,000 yard season is in play? He’s been very close twice before. There will be no fans at this game. By choice.
Raiders/Panthers:
Everyone is jawing about Ruggs 3 but 3rd round wr Bryan Edwards did the wowing in camp. Them Las Vegans have quite a bit of young talent at the rb/wr spots-how long before they give Carr the old boot?
There’s your first slate. Have at it.
Are the Bills really freezing out SIngletary for rookie.
This fucking mother fucking fuck shit fuck.
We switched the Seahawks o line with turnstiles. Lets see if anyone notices.
Wilson is taking a beating
Carson TD! Deadkittens* are on the board!
*it’s my team in one of my leagues
Shit, Adrian Peterson is still good at smashing the middle
Sure am glad I left him on the bench.
Whelp, that is the end of the Discord experiment, lol.
Eh, not really.. we just need to copy the North Koreans and point some AA guns at people to incentivize them to join up 😀
“I’d better join. That thing could take out half my gut.”
You didn’t want to hear my voice anyway. It’s even dumber than my words.
Remember I am from the mountains of NC, and from my experience few people sound dumber than that.
EVERTON WOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is a horseshit call on Fuller
Falcons secondary undoing all of Grady Jarret’s work.
First “What is Catch?” moment of the 2020 NFL Season in CLE/BAL.
lol DirecTV is a fuck. NFL Game Pass isn’t even available in the USA anymore.
Me: I am willing to consider paying to watch my favorite football team disappoint me on a weekly basis every year.
NFL: no.
Apparently my apartment is not eligible for standalone Sunday Ticket, so there’s exactly zero legal way for me to get standalone football. Fuck the NFL and all the networks.
They’re both pretty large disgraces
Just find an alternative stream source..Arrrrrrrrrrrrright?
Bar nearby?
JACOBS
Going for it on 4th and 7? Ok…
Trubisky throwing it behind his receiver? Not good.
That intended receiver being Tedd Ginn Jr? WHAT THE FUCK?
You know your kicker situation, yeah?
Hence the ok to going for it
/misinterpreted the “ok” 😀
Monsters of the Midway!
So… you’re saying that DaBearZ faithful will be peacefully protesting against their QB again 😀
Jesus, the Bears really need to shoot Mitch out of cannon
You called? – Rex Grossman
Replay booth. The most important part of the Browns red zone defense.
Noice catch there by Carson City.
Newton has already broken Brady’s career rushing record for a NE QB.
A brave new world we’re living in here. Let’s see what happens.
Its really weird to watch Pats without Brady. We’re thru the looking glass here, people!
Prolly can catch a JEWKAH “fastball” too
Brokeback QB doing Brokeback Things
These WIP commercials reminding me of all the worst parts of Philadelphia sports, namely the people not on the teams
Suddenly have a craving for Tastykakes
I fucking hate Baltimore but God fucking damn is Lamar is a fucking highlight machine.
Lamar!
Heaaaadlyyyy
7 MOAR minutes to hold on, Toffees
Née Slurs same as the old Slurs
[windmills on guitar]
Jack Del Rio: *gets fooled again*
To Brocky’s (repeated) point, that’s the kind of play bears fans would have booed Trubisky for when it wasn’t really his fault
The patented “Keep Throwing it to TEs” offense pays off again
Took the Mrs out for a fine dining experience last night. Grandma is in town and watched blaxito so no rush to get back. I can say that I do not think I can argue that it was not the greatest dining experience of my life.
And now I’m going to try to hold down an empty stadium, no-preseason, regional slate of OAK at CAR….
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Finally found a stream. It’s getting harder and harder these days. But God, have I missed this.
*cough* https://home.nflbite.com/ *cough*
Dolphins upgrading this year to Tank With Tua
Younghoe scoring already
That’s what hoes of all ages do
Don’t she always?
Time to overract for a bit .. Boy, this Cam Newton guy seems to be reaaaaally good… WE ARE WINNING THE SUPERB OWL BOYS 😀
Did I start Kerryon Johnson over Nyheim Hines?
SURE DID, OTHER HIPPO!!
Hines = NuEkeler
oh yeah, he is on both my squadrons, I just wanted to see his workload before I “risked” it
I would love to see the confused looks on the Fat Humps supporters when Rivers orders Fish Tacos.
“What’s a fish?”
How did they know to put frys in my burrito? – Rivers
That an euphemism for something? 😀
Theyd say only manning has rhatyright
Née Slurs lose yardage on their first drive. The Rivera Era is over.
Artist’s conception of me watching the Early Afternoon Games waiting for my team to play:
WHEEEEEEEE
Fins ready to establish the punt almost paid off
How do the Lions have more fans in attendance during COVID than during the Wayne Fontes era?
Beer in hand, let’s fucking go
Happy NFL-mas lads and lasses … Also, discord server would really be useful right about now 😀
Armed and Hammered did one??
Ohshit, forgot about that. Is anyone there yet, ‘coz shit talkin’ beckons 😀
I am
Yep, hang on a sec https://discord.gg/7vw6Aby
Seven HOURS!!!!
you’re supposed to go to the ER if it doesn’t go down after 2 hours
4 hours and that’s only so you can get your complimentary high-five from yer proctologist
The Browns should have the edge as they have a lot of experience in empty stadiums.
Taking knees in ATL
Merril Reese getting halfway through the slur every time he references them before catching himself
I am legit touched by Scott Muthafuckin’ Hansen’s joy.
Fan duel, pawnshop, and then disability insurance lawyer.
These have been my commercials. I think….I might be in a poor part of the US.
Thank Morrigane for Redzone
HERE WE FUCKIN’ GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUO
20 minutes overlap, Everton prreserving 1-nil lead, 1st RedZone of the year. Expecting an imminent stroke.
EAT MOAR CHIPS!