Hello there fellow DFO’er. Hope your well today. And thanks for coming back to see last weeks comments of the week as decided by my brain. There’s no reason as to why some comments make it and others don’t.
Spring has finally arrived in where I live. I had to cut the lawn already. Boooo. It’s really early for me to be cutting it. Most years I can wait until the end of the month. This just reinforced to me that climate change is real as it’s be warmer here than usual. It also didn’t help that the neighboUrs on each side of me also cut their lawns mid week, so mine now looked unkept. Gotta keep up.
Still with the spring thing, our little front garden has 9 tulip flowers this year. Up from 1 or 2 flowers the last few years. Not sure why we got extra flowers, but it looks nice. Also we are awful at gardening. Even when trying to take care of plants, we’ve managed to kill them. Whatever the opposite of “green thumb” is what we have. We can barely keep plastic plants looking alive. Whatever has managed to live in the garden is in spite of me, not because of me.
I do want to do something in our empty backyard, but need plants that can handle the following:
– shitty soil that is clay starting 2 inches below the surface
– full sun
– drought from when i forget to water then
– lots of water as the backyard slopes down toward the fence and where the garden would be as it gets flooded when it rains at all
– needs to flower
– rabbits won’t eat them
Ya, don’t think such a plant exists. But open to suggestions other than turf and concrete.
As a reminder, this post will cover comments made up to and through the Saturday Night Open Thread. Sunday comments stand alone and Monday comments will go on the next week’s post. Note that during the offseason, I’ll probably look at the Sunday posts.
Without further ado, here are the comments of the week.
Does a mock draft count as a sporting event? Because I’ve been inspired by BeerGuyRob and I would like to change the outcome of the KSK rock star girlfriend fantasy draft, wherein I foolishly passed on drafting Susanna Hoffs in the first round because I thought she’d be around in the second.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Probably going to be on the board for a while, but I’m taking Super Bowl XLI. After Devin Hester’s already amazing opening kickoff return for a TD, Chris Harris’s interception of Peyton Manning’s tbag becomes a pick six instead of the 3 and out that happened IRL, Rex Grossman throws 2 garbage time TDs and becomes a Super Bowl champion.
BrettFavresColonoscopy
Just begging for a baby boom, aren’t ya?
LemonJello
My wife has expressed interest in divorce and remarrying a billionaire. She said I could live in the guest house on the estate and not have to work anymore. My son smirked at this idea. Little does he realize he will have to use Bing on Edge or be sent to boarding school.
TheRevanchist
“Why does Joe, the largest President, not simply eat the other three?”
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Fact: The Carters have shrunk 73% since they left the White House.
Fact: The Carters will be taking a certain piece of jewelry to Mount Doom.
Fact: The Carters have dual citizenship in the USA and Lilliput.
SonOfSpam
Breaking up is hard to do.
TheRevanchist
Guess who’s back, bitches.
WCS
I just kind of lost my shit with a customer service rep.
RIKKI: [after having been transferred to a customer retention specialist] I’m calling to cancel my service.
OPERATOR: Okay, before we do that I just need to ask you some questions about…
RIKKI: I’m just calling to cancel my service, I’m not going to answer any questions. I’ve already told you as much as I’m going to.
OPERATOR: I understand that, but I have to ask…
RIKKI: I AM UNDER NO OBLIGATION TO EXPLAIN WHY I AM CANCELLING MY ACCOUNT.
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Douglas Fairbanks lectures a crowd in NYC in 1918. “Stop wearing hats!” he’s shouting.
Besides Fairbanks, I can count only 9 men without hats in the crowd. These men all died in the Spanish Flu pandemic because they weren’t protected by hats.
Brick Meathook
Canadian toque wearers were virtually immune to the Spanish Flu. Quebec scientists are still poring over the data to this day.
scotchnaut
These guys bought into the whole “no hats” thing.
Viva La Tabula Raza
Loved everything about this series [the places you’ll go to find a lineman], especially making sure Bo Duke was photoshopped into every appropriate spot.
And, of course, the predictable outcome where they completely failed to get Charmslinger any help.
SonOfSpam
Today is the day of the Sink-oh Duh-my-oh. My people (Californians) have celebrated this holiday as a day to be drunk and eat tacos for many generations, at least 2 or so. My people (Mexicans) don’t care about this day. My people (white people from the mom named Debbie’s side) will probably just stay at home and order Panera for dinner.
TheRevanchist
So, we’re up to 428 arrests for the MAGA terror attack/coup attempt of 06 Jan. Strangely, many of those arrested are affiliated with the 3 Percenters, Oath Keepers, Proud Boys, and QAnoners, and none with “Antifa” or BLM. Many are unaffiliated with these radical groups, and are merely very enthusiastic Trump supporters, but seem quite willing to be led by the nose.
Nevertheless, these people are all traitors to this nation. Firing squad with no blindfold may be a little extreme in many cases (but not all); however, treason is traditionally met with a death sentence.
I think that any former or current military, national guard, or reservist that can be shown to have been in the capitol building that day should at least have to forfeit all government benefits that they may be eligible for, including any VA benefits (including VA hospital medical care and DV license plates), disability payments, and all retirement pensions for retirees. Fuck them, if they want to overthrow the government, and betrayed the oath they swore to defend the constitution and then wiped their ass with it instead, why should the government give them a nickel?
https://www.npr.org/2021/02/09/965472049/the-capitol-siege-the-arrested-and-their-stories#database
Viva La Tabula Raza
I just got a project which has managed to cut through my general work malaise and sound pretty damn exciting, so that’s nice except for the part where it means the other shit i’m trying to wrap up will probably languish for even longer.
Oh well, only 2.5 weeks till my vacation, and that should refill my burnout counter
Doktor Zymm
Happy Cinco de Mayo everyone! Let’s all celebrate the fact that Mexico was cancelling the French way before we came up with ‘Freedom Fries’
Doktor Zymm
The NHL was just asking for this. Rangers have nothing to play for and a lot to prove, and the gutless league chose not to suspend Wilson, which would have defused a lot of it.
I mean, I don’t mind. I’m glad to have the dumb fights disappear from the game, but some good old-fashioned score settling like this works just fine.
Dunstan
This week in What Day Is It?, the most popular pandemic game:
Yesterday, I though it was Thursday. I spent most of today wondering “When is Saturday?”
Don T
All week has been Monday this week. Wprst week in a year.
litre_cola
Typo stays. Because.
litre_cola
When I went back to my wife and BC Dicks hometown there is a shop that has been on “You gotta eat here” (canadia!) Anywhoo it’s a pie shop. I bought a couple 1/2 size pies and completely forgot about them. Even though we were supposed to have one for my bday, (waaayyy too much wine and weed for the memory). I remembered tonight. Incoming Blueberry Peach.
litre_cola
Admin
May 6, 2021 6:17 pm
Every week lately it seems that I read the Thursday Thread and go, “Oh shit! I have to do Sexy Friday!”
Luckily, I prepared ahead of time and the post is ready!
ballsofsteelandfury
Oh yeah? Well, I already solved the music puzzle, how bout dat!
Gumbygirl
Brick Meathook
Here’s my bold prediction on the Rodgers situation–
He pouts for a while, they make overtures about a “big splash” maybe even leak a “secret” workout of Kaep, and then he comes back, wins another NFC north title, loses in the Divisional playoffs for a change, and then pulls a Brady next season.
BrettFavresColonoscopy
May 7, 2021 10:57 am
Throwing this open for suggestions from sharkbait and the DFO “drink tank” generally:
A month or so ago, I bought a bottle of creme de banana to use for making Bananas Foster. I’m trying to figure out cocktails to use it in — internet searches mostly turn up various “shooters,” which are not really my thing.
Also, I long ago bought a bottle of macadamia nut liqueur. Unfortunately, I can’t find a lot of recipes for it, and it is cloyingly sweet, so it’s a little tricky to work with. It may be that its best use is as a splash in a cup of coffee, though again that’s not really my thing.
Dunstan
Banana liqueur and peanut butter whiskey.
Call it the Bloated Elvis.
Or just buttchug it and call it Banana in the Tailpipe.
SonOfSpam
Heading to bed to read for awhile, goodnight my darling dears! I will leave you with this
Gumbygirl
The theme is a tribute to TWBS because they’re all Garbage.
Mr. Ayo
Gumby and I got our taxes done today, and to celebrate we went to the weed store. They gave us free tacos in the parking lot! Three each, with rice, beans, and some amazing hibiscus drink. Al pastor and pollo. My dudes, we thought we died and went to heaven like young Spanky there!
Gumbygirl
So tWBS has already asked Tawny Kitaen out, we’re all agreed on that, right?
Horatio Cornblower
Well looks like I have a new Dutch team.
De Graafschap, a second division Dutch team, can get promoted to Eredivisie today, so their fans decided to escort the team bus in tractors.
— ESPN FC (@ESPNFC) May 7, 2021
The real football farmers 🚜👨🌾 pic.twitter.com/fidENJ8GvJ
litre_cola
I heard that if you officially renege on your fandom of the team you have to write a “Deere Jan” letter.
scotchnaut
Don T
For all you can eat fried chicken, I’ll let myself be controlled by an incubus.
Again.
Don T
No idea how I’m gonna hold this piss for 20 MOAR minutes
King Hippo
Beerguyrob
Gumbygirl
Thanks for all the comments and funny and everything else.
Stay busy and safe out there.
NOTE banner image from here
Have you considered putting in raised planting beds? I know a couple people who have done that recently, and then you’ll have far more options on what to plant
They wrote a children’s’ book about how I ended up in rehab!
Speaking of, how are you doing?
Admittedly, it will be challenging doing the Stanley Cup playoffs…
The floor of an Applebee’s? Well la-di-dah, Your Majesty. Mourning Phillip’s passing with the Queen, were you?
We are so glad you are back! This site needs all of the Yinzers it can get.
Incidentally, I did try the Macadamia Nut Banana Daiquiri as discussed. It showed some promise, though it will require tinkering. It wasn’t overly sweet, but the nose of the macadamia liqueur still dominates, so I’m thinking I’ll need to use less of that and more of the banana next time.
“More banana, less nut. My sex life’s motto. *sigh*”
-D. Favre, Hattiesburg MS
RIP Colt Brennan. Dunno what happened, but he’s now backing up Steve McNair.
I really love being able to watch footy while working. Manchester United v Leicester City is on NBCSN.
C’mon you Foxes!
My SIL and her family moved out of Torrance to Rancho Santa Margarita. Instead of just calling it a home, everything she says is “million dollar house”. She says is on texts, FB, and when you talk to her. It’s now got to the point of where her kids are calling it their million dollar home. And, it’s not like they could afford it. Her husband’s family is loaded and pretty much this is part of the inheritance, and his family is paying for the house to be renovated and buying all new appliances.
We are all thoroughly annoyed by this.
It’s no Rancho Penisquitas!
– L. Hamilton
Hacksaw references are always a +1
I refer to my house as the “Hundred Thousand Hacienda”
People don’t get nearly as upset.
“I call the ICE detention centers Hundred Thousand Haciendas and libruls lose their damn minds.”
-DJT
There’s a southwestern style home over by my old GF’s place in SE Mass. Stucco, arches, saltillo, red barrel tile roof, etc. It absolutely fucking out of place there. And there’s a place around the corner from me here in STex that would not be out of place on the Cape, Nantucket, or the Vineyard. Totally doesn’t belong. But it does give a good landmark when you give folks directions.
Also…a million bucks in OC is a decent house in a decent area. Not a mansion, not beachfront property, etc.
And living in RSM sucks. You’re inland so you get the shit weather, and you’re 30 minutes from everywhere because traffic is hell, unless you wanna take the toll road for nine bucks each way,
We know South Bay pretty well, but nothing that far inland. When I looked up RSM a couple of weeks ago, to see what was to do around there, it was nothing but a park, another park, another park. Around 10 of them in total. Nothing else showed up.
They are going to be bored real quick.
There are houses in South Central going for $700K. A million isn’t what it used to be.