Your Monday Night Football Open Thread

Well, that was an interesting weekend of games and this morning continued in that vein. A few things have already been discussed but I must do my thing.

Fallout:

-Millions of fantasy players woke up to discover a black hole in their lineups. El Wheelchaircito is done for awhile and he’s such a unique player that the usual handcuffage will not be sufficient. The Titans themselves acknowledged this by signing the corpse of Adrian Peterson. Remember his work for the Lions? Guh.

-T’was a great day for backup qb’s yesterday. Rush, Siemian and White all put up great numbers on the stat sheet and on their CV’s. I guess this is why the same names circulate around the NFL year after year-they were asked to simply ‘not fuck up’ and instead made plays that were the difference in their games. Coaches remember that.

-I wonder how long Cal Ridley just tried to ‘tough it out’ before realizing that his mental health issues required more attention. I imagine that mindset is entrenched in football at every level.

-Von Miller was sent to the Rams for a second and third and I like it. This rental wants to put a (second) ring on it and I admire LA’s moxie. I sorta made mention of this when talking about Cincy. So many teams that feel that they are cruising (or even on the cusp of being well above average) simply stick with the status quo and hope everything will work out. Adding more talent usually works out to be a positive.

To The Game!

Giants/Chiefs:

-It’s Just That Bad: the KC D has given up the same amount of points as the pitiful Jags-203.

-Thing is, their losses are against teams that are all headed to the playoffs. The Ravens, Chargers, Bills and Titans (maybe an asterisk here?) aren’t exactly bottom feeders.

-It is funny to me that both these sub .500 teams are scratching and clawing for different types of relevancy.

-Electric talent Kadarius Toney is back in the lineup and so is Shepard. So that helps. Hopefully OC Garrett’s playcalling-which has been outstanding the last three weeks-continues to move Dimes around in the pocket and finds wr’s in space.

-On a personal note, I hope that the Giants Hands of Stone tight end Evan Engram is held out of the game at the last minute because that would mean that he’s been traded.

Type the stuff that you like to type.

5 3 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
202 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Horatio Cornblower

That’s one hell of an inspiring drive by the New York Football Giants.

Can’t imagine why they’re not running through walls for Judge and Garrett.

The Maestro

Now THIS appears to be a fucking wild story. Only in Texas, of course.

https://twitter.com/thomasgcampbell/status/1455308414607892485?s=21

Gatoraids

Yeah wilder is that its not his monkey but his stripper girlfriends who he left his family for

litre_cola

Pole Assassin!

LemonJello

Coach Zimmer wants everyone to know that Beansie was not involved.

comment image?ssl=1

clint greasewood

Hook em’ Jaws

Horatio Cornblower

I mean, the kid dressed as a banana: what did they think was going to happen?

King Hippo

Why can’t he do it? Why can’t he set his monkey free?

Gumbygirl

Kid should have worn a better costume. The monkey was not entertained.

LemonJello

comment image

King Hippo

WOO!!!! Hippo into the lead

clint greasewood

I need a Engram fumble or interception to win this week inn Fantasy.

Horatio Cornblower

“Bears! Steelers! Your paint drying on the wall! Next Monday!”

The Maestro

With Derrick Henry going down and Adrian Peterson coming in to replace him, I give it 2 weeks before AD is similarly incapacitated and Frank Gore comes back for one last quest for glory.

If Frank Gore goes down: IDK, Trent Richardson? Peyton Hillis? Tiki Barber???

Gumbygirl

OJ is available.

Horatio Cornblower

Is Christian Okoye busy?

LemonJello

What’s the word from Detroit*? Is the Bus available?

*Bettis is from there, did you know that?

King Hippo

ONE MOAR Booker dumpoff, pretty please!

Horatio Cornblower

NAILED IT!

King Hippo

I am now quite content for a cromulent, uneventful KC win.

Sharkbait

I need 4 MOAR Mahomes points, THEN we can have the uneventful KC win.

Horatio Cornblower

Obviously I have a vested interest in the Giants getting into FG range here, but does NY’s clock management here make any sense?

Dunstan

Not really. The run on 2nd and 5 is iffy, and then after burning that time you can’t run up the gut on 3rd and 1.

clint greasewood

comment image

Don T

Whenever common sense gets in the way, Cisco makes the pass incomplete.

Sharkbait

You try routing packets all day. Every day
comment image

herodotus450

Is that a token-ring ethernet T1-line in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

LemonJello

Eli can’t wait to dig into his Halloween candy once all this talking is done.

Gatoraids

Peytons already got him to trade all his snickers away for Good and Plenties

Sharkbait

Oh cool. Strahan and Eli reminiscing about super bowl wins.
comment image

borisnow

lol was 6 not enough for you?

LemonJello

comment image

Horatio Cornblower

‘The Upside Down’ is also what the police called Britt Reid’s car, but ESPN’s promo using it was cool, too.

Dunstan

Strahan was choking Eli as a warning about what happens to snitches

litre_cola

Ray Lewis nods.

Sharkbait

Thank you Strahan! I never understood why you throw short of the line to gain on 3rd!

Horatio Cornblower

As someone with the Giants kicker and needing about 5 points to win my FF game, Steve Levy can go ahead and shut the fuck up about FGs not beating the Chiefs tonight.

They can beat Lee goddammit, and that’s all we care about, Steve.

borisnow

I mean Levy can just go ahead and shut the fuck up period.

Gumbygirl

Eli’s catching all the flies. He really has the quintessential Dumb Look, bless his heart!

Sharkbait

comment image

Horatio Cornblower

The Giants should get 15 extra yards forward for taunting. If you can taunt in their situation, you desrve some goddamn credit.

borisnow

Lol…I went with his son in another chat but great-grandfather is way better

King Hippo

Hey, THAT is what I wanted/expected from CE-H

/chugs bleach

borisnow

What in the hell is a David Gore????

Last edited 3 years ago by borisnow
litre_cola

He invented the internet.

King Hippo

Derrick! I had to look up the name, too

borisnow

excuse me it’s actually Derrick

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Bears Steelers next Monday night?

That’s skippable.

LemonJello

comment image

Sharkbait

It’s a negroni type of evening tonight.

borisnow

or Old Fashioned

Sharkbait

Also acceptable!

Dunstan

That is an excellent idea.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Why is Peyton holding his phone in his left hand? Jen Sterger?

Gumbygirl

I am a lefty. I hold my phone in my right hand so I can poke at it with my left.

The Maestro

Same here!

LemonJello

Waiting on Amazon delivery confirmation of “a package for his wife.”

Anthony In TX

Obligatory Jen Sterger pic

https://images.app.goo.gl/3JUXydTDHwGD1s1F7

Anthony In TX

Well, that didn’t embed like I wanted it to.

Brocky

mood
comment image

LemonJello

“Are those Neopolitan?”
-A. Reid

Sharkbait

Stop. Making. Unnecessary. Ghostbusters. Movies.

The Maestro

But bustin’ makes me feel good.

Sharkbait

comment image

Last edited 3 years ago by Sharkbait
clint greasewood

comment image

LemonJello

“This cocaine isn’t going to pay for itself.”
-Hollywood

litre_cola

Those were filmed in part here!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Wow

Brocky

so as of last Wednesday, I’m in first place in my league, with an 82% of making the playoffs.

all four of my top scorers (henry, Murray, Hopkins, and Julio jones). I’m scoring 72 points in a legue where no one else has scored under 100.

on top of that I’m ticked because my planned social activities Saturday night got ended early because people have to be lame and go tend to their kids and be home by nine.

also my cell phone broke. like i was driving and it just checked out. I’m tying this on a tablet.

tablets suck.

I need a fucking drink

Gumbygirl

That sucks. Have a kitten.

images (24).jpeg
Horatio Cornblower

You can’t drink a kitten, Gumbygirl. That’s just science.

Mr. Ayo

Depends on your blender.

Don T

A gap? Moar like A hsngar smirite?

Sharkbait

Make MNF with Peyton, Eli, Stewart and Lynch a permanent panel

borisnow

Just make sure Levy is out

Sharkbait

Agreed.
comment image

litre_cola

Brady and Chris Long were good too.

litre_cola

Eli busting Stewarts balls is great.

ballsofsteelandfury

Eli is just great period.

Seriously, this is the greatest television concept put into place in the last two decades.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ugh, I turned this game on just in time to see Not Kelce catch a TD pass. Knock that shit off.

borisnow

I’ll subscribe to this

LemonJello

All these turnovers make Andy a hungry head coach.

LemonJello

Danny felt bad about getting the ball like that, so he gave it back. Such a gettleman!

rockingdog

Found a funny;

Having sex with no rhythm, as to not attract the attention of Shai Hulud

Don T

Thesis: I gots Mahomes against me in the Rican league.

Antithesis: But need the Kelce points in Freezer Wodka.

Synthesis: I should’ve bought some alkyhol.

Mr. Ayo

Chefception!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Right now is being asked to put on this mask.
comment image

litre_cola

Need 18 and change from Williams to beat Rev in Freezer Vodka league. Let’s gooooo running game.

LemonJello

“18 and change? Older than I normally like…”
-M. Gaetz

King Hippo

Pretty stoked to see I am one of the 2 living in the DFO SurvivoUr. I picked the Chefs in moneyed SurvivoUr, so still have a bit of sweat equity.

Luckily, I took my own advice and napped through the first 2/3 of Everton’s slapdickery.

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

I can still pull this off is Jones and Kelce combine for 60 tonight, so I’M CONFIDENT

LemonJello

Da Fuq does Booger know about playing QB in the National Football League?

King Hippo

He is a Man Named Booger. He obvs knows ALL THE THINGS.

herodotus450

Alex Smith: (crosses fingers)
[Crunch]
Uh oh.

borisnow

I told someone on Saturday that Toney wasn’t going to play. My apologies…he is.

Fronkenshteen

It was me. Not to worry. The question remains the same: Toney or Darrel Williams in the flex spot. What say you? I’m up 7 points and my opponent has only the Chiefs D remaining. I have my flex and Travis Kelce left. My gut says give Toney a “show me” week and play it safe with The Mentor.

borisnow

Williams is the safer play. In my Showdown lineups I’m heavily invested in Toney, but that has price factored in.

ballsofsteelandfury

That really sucks about Tractorcito blowing a tire.

Has anyone checked on Don T?

Senor Weaselo

I’m gonna guess paper towel fort.

Don T

I wish! Alas, I’m not a billionaire.

litre_cola

BUT HE IS OUR LAWYER DAMMIT!