27 November Nighty-Night JV Thread

Things Hippo learned today:

  1. I jinxed Beep Beep! and feel bad about it.
  2. When deliberating “nap or power through” – always choose nap (high-fives my 2p self).
  3. Cheering for tOSU and the JV Massholes was as ineffective as it was gross.
  4. I am glad I didn’t bet today…except for that War Damn Eagle ML itch…

To the fixtures!

Texas A&M (-6) at LSU (7:00, ESPN)

Does the squadron want to keep practicing another 3 weeks so Coach O can extend his life support through the Weedeater Bowl?  I would suppose not.

West By God Virginia (-15.5) at Kansas (7:00, FS1)

Come on, Fuckers du Cousins.  We all want a Boots on the Ground for Princess WCS’ first Bowl game.

Oklahoma (+4) at Oklahoma State (7:30, ABC)

Time to see if the T. Boone Pickens’ ba-jillions can buy a Bedlam win and an outside shot at the playoffs.  Watch them fuck it up.

Kenfucky (+3) at Louisville (7:30, ESPN2)

Look, my prognosticator hat is questionable at best.  But I don’t think “home field” is enough to favoUr a 6-win ACC side against 8-wins in the SEC.  Yes, even the SEC East.

BYU (-7.5) at Southern Cal (10:30, ESPN)

Against my better judgment, here’s a tweaker fixture.  It will be a shite game, but just think of how Merry a Christmas it will be for Sprite’s Los Angeles sales rep!

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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2Pack

To get your Avitar back… yes… sadly… you do need to go through that Gravatar account set up bull shit. Good news is… even a knucklehead like me swerving down the info autostrada… could muddle his way through it.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I can see it!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Also, good morning!

2Pack

Ciao Buddy

Gumbygirl

Just grip your pillow tight, you’ll be ok!

rockingdog

Last funny;

These dudes did like 12 hrs of a parody of the Joe Rogan Podcast
There’s so much here, it’s hilarious.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=P6Iyg9fznvM&feature=youtu.be

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s so good. You can literally jump in at any point and it’s exactly the same pseudo-intellectual meaningless nonsense.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oklahoma really lived up to the Sooner nickname by blowing their wad early.

TheRevanchist

The sooner they come, the limper they fall.

rockingdog

Found a funny;

I open a twix and find 3 sticks. I tell no one, the secret stays with me. at my funeral a shadowy figure stands at the back

Redshirt
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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Last edited 2 years ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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Mr. Ayo

Coach O will not be denied.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Hey you should see if that guy hosts workshops!” – Mrs. Ayo

Redshirt

Auburn lost when they kept their injured QB in the game when they needed first downs to win the game. Either put in your backup/emergency QB, play Wildcat, or just direct snap it to your RB and put in an extra blocker. Alabama was able to stop them because it was painfully obvious they were running.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Should have run that tight end throwback screen for the two point conversion after their first score in overtime.

Redshirt

I would’ve done a fake field goal instead. If you’re going down, you may as well go down stupid.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Anybody else get drunk and decide to fuck off and play 9 ball alone at your in laws?

WCS

Cousinfuckers going bowling?
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Senor Weaselo

They’re break dance bowling!

Senor Weaselo

Frank Mir’s still, you know, alive?

Mr. Ayo

T. Boone Pickens just shat all down his leg.

WCS

Pickenseseses have forgotten how to play FOOBAWL.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Should’ve paid for porn

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Leftovers?

Viva La Tabula Raza

This Land-Stealers matchup might end up being interesting.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Don’t feel guilty, the “beep beep” has been our call sign for nearly 40 years.

Don T

I want 👇🏼
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SonOfSpam

HISTORY SHOWS AGAIN AND AGAIN
HOW NATURE POINTS UP THE FOLLY OF MEN

Viva La Tabula Raza

I spent 2-1/2 years in Japan (when were in port, not while underway, obvs). Man that is one weird fucking place. I dug it.

rockingdog

That’s Rocking! 💯

Horatio Cornblower

Clearly the better team won. Gotta give Auburn credit for making it close, and Hippo for calling it correctly earlier.

SonOfSpam

Auburn lost when they went for the PAT in the 1st OT.

ballsofsteelandfury

Actually, they lost when they couldn’t make 3rd and 1 with 1:43 left in the game. They make a first down, the game is over.

ballsofsteelandfury

That was a spectacular lesson in grabbing defeat from the jaws of victory.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

And who says Alabama’s education system is the worst in the country?

Viva La Tabula Raza

Amazingly enough, there are something like 7 universities in Alabama that directly work with NASA at the Redstone Arsenal and the George Marshall Space Flight Center in Huntsville. NASA is not really a sanctuary for idiots. I reckon that’s why most college towns are much more liberal than non-school-having towns. Smarter citizens.

Gumbygirl

As a graduate of one of those universities, I can attest. People hear the accent and assume stupidity. Far from the truth.

WCS

Of. Course.

Horatio Cornblower

Why do they make them walk to the other end of the field?

And now, amid the excitement of overtime, a lovely stroll.

SonOfSpam

BOTH sets of end zone fans should get to throw pee bags on the players.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

When Alabama wins I will at least be able to smile at how interesting overtime was.

Mr. Ayo

I’m seeing a lot of wrong predictions here.

*bets it all on Roll Damn Tide*

Mr. Ayo

Yes! I’ve doubled the square root of fuck all!

Don’t do the math, it’s not important.

Horatio Cornblower

There is no way that ‘Bama isn’t ending this game with a TD right now.

Mr. Ayo

So I’m to believe that catch was better than perfect?

scotchnaut

This game is sorta good.

Horatio Cornblower

Earholegate coming in 3, 2, 1.

Horatio Cornblower

I got to this game sort of late, (was watching snow game and Minnesota), but is Auburn’s QB playing on one leg?

That seems less than ideal.

Horatio Cornblower

I keep telling my wife that.

scotchnaut

Not surprised she’s hard of hearing at this point in your marriage.

Horatio Cornblower

Like everything else, she’s faking it.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I don’t think Auburn tackled Alabama inbounds even a single time during that drive. Even for a prevent defense, that is unforgivable.