Are you on the cusp of getting into the playoffs in a few leagues as I am? Are you depending on the likes of Jeff Wilson, KJ Osborn (he came through!) and Jalen Guyton to get you there? I pray that you’re not my kind of stupid-otherwise I wouldn’t be special anymore.
To The Games!
Ravens/Browns:
Baltimore is digging into their practice squad and beyond for some, any, kind of db help because they are about seven guys down at this point. It’s the perfect time for that secondary to be exploited by a competent qb but fortunately they’re facing Mayfield.
Jags/Titans:
“You’re tearing me apart from the inside out!” is what a certain franchise would say if it had a mouth hole and was coached by a narcissistic asshole the likes of Meyer. As per the usual this week he lied about the Robinson situation, undermined players and coaches alike and made a fool of himself. It’s very telling, the amount of info that’s being leaked from the organization.
Raiders/Chiefs:
This sure looks like a ‘get right’ game for K.C. as Las Vegas (losers of 4 of 5) are reeling just as everyone and their mother predicted. I’d be stunned if the Raiders turned things around at this point.
Saints/Jets:
Kamara’s Back! Fantasy owners needing a win to get into the playoffs (sounds familiar…) dance in their sweat-stained underwear. Wives cover their children’s eyes and pets try to hide under the couch as the dreadful spectacle unfolds.
Cowboys/TEAM:
Washington has won 4 in a row and the D looks formidable again. Dallas can land a crushing blow with a W and finally separate itself from the dross that is the rest of the NFC East.
Falcons/Panthers:
A sub .500 team might just make it into the NFC playoffs and it may just be one of these two teams if either one can put a stop to their respective skids. Nah, I was kidding.
Seahawks/Texans:
Seattle might just win back to back games for the very first time this year today. But t’will mean not a thing. Houston is angling for that #1 overall pick so they’re not interested in putting up any resistance.
Who do you need to go off today? Let me know.
Wasn’t expecting the Boyz/Teem game to be booked for excitement at the end, but sure, why not.
That missed xp will kill a 150 dollar ticket I have. I have WFT +6.5.
edit/ wrong ticket but still!!!!
Hahaha FedEx field is Rocking!
WFT feels like they can pull this W off!!
pull this W off! – what Dan Snyder yells at the cheerleaders
The Ravens did some dumb play calling at the end. Going long on 1st down when you just need to set it up for the best kicker in the NFL, smh. It was just dumb and didn’t help the team in any way possible.
What the fuck was that? is Dak trying to lose the game?
Sudden yet probably unimportant change!
Urban has to be fired later right?
NEVER!
but all the good CFB jobs are gone already. He’ll stay.
I don’t know if that’s a bad play call or a bad read but what a disaster for the Ravens.
Wow. Wet-fart letdown.
If Tucker wins this for the Ravens…
Oh thepauls, oh no.
Onside kick!!!!
Beat them Browns!
48-9
That’s a Scoragami!!!
That’s ROCKINGGGGG!!!
Hooray pewter lining!
Also this browns ravens game is Rocking in these last 2 min!!!
Shit yea!
Tyler Huntley, hero!
Hahahaha shit yea!!!
Taysom Hill with the Huge running TD!!
That’s Rocking!!! 💯🙌
Kudos to you for sticking with your instinct when everyone was telling you to switch out.
Magic Underweardown!
Dallas/WTF FIGHT
I wish! That’s way cuter than the game
Also I suspect that neither team is particularly vigilant about keeping their bortholes clean
I love how they both walked away going
” yup, kicked his ass!”
Our prayers have been answered. Praise Jeebus!
Apparently CBS listens to you.
She may be one of them Neilsen families.
O-face for Jesus!
Might want to keep heinicke out of this game now WFTs
Falcons going to Falcon here?
The Chefs are up by 39 points. Why haven’t they switched to a more competitive game? Fucking ridiculous.
Sorry, I just got here, didn’t realize this topic has already been thoroughly discussed!
1) Never apologize
b) You’re absolutely correct
Andy Reid making that challenge at this point in the game makes me wish for his son to go to jail for the rest of his miserable life.
/was wishing for that anyways
Genie: “Yeaaaaahhhhhhh, that one’s pretty set in stone. You may want to save your wish for something else.”
At least it cost my opponent six fantasy points.
/is going to lose anyways
That was a fumble. NFL officiating is so bad.
Although I find it hard to believe that this was the call that’s going to affect the spread.
CBS broadcasting an ad for vacation homes during a Raiders Chiefs game makes as much sense as an Axe Body Spray ad during an episode of Grey’s Anatomy.
“Yeah, why have a vacation home? Just relocate every time you want to be somewhere else.” — Raiders
My housemate in Scotland used to cover himslef in various Axe body sprays. It was horrific. Smokers would light up in the living room to make the Axe smell go away.
When I lived in Scotland, we called that a Scottish shower.
As opposed to a “scotch shower” which is what Steve Keim is taking right now.
I miss the various NfL personalities names Rex
Andy Reid is thinking about Thursday night, because that’s 2-for-1 night at Capt. Humpty’s Ribs n’ Ice Cream, and he’s got a coupon.
Finally!
Taysom hill with the rushing TD
Took you long enough…that’s Rocking!
Non-Gendereds are rolling, but Dak! looks awful. JUST LIKE MY FANTASY TEAM, NOT COINCIDENTALLY
I think he’s hurt and they’re keeping it quiet. Because you’re right, he has looked like shit lately.
DAK TO COOP PLEASE HIPPO IS BEGGING Y’ALL
“It’s an Andy Reid kinda day….”
His kids killed someone else!?
Naw, someone close to him committed suicide.
He’ll take an hour or so to express condolences, then get back to game-planning.
By “game-planning” I assume you mean “looking up recipes for wild boar”.
Rain of fish and tartar sauce
THIS RATBIRDS GAME I CALL FIRE ISLAND BECAUSE THEY’S CHUBB EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK
For fuck’s sake, CBS, why are you still broadcasting this game?
“Torture porn is a legit genre, bud. And we’re branching out.”
-director of “Saw”
We’d also have accepted “Eli Roth”.
I know I’m feeling hostel.
So glad my red zone started working again just in time for me to watch the end of all the not close at all games
Jest are poop even by Jest standards. PRAY FOAR (the absent) LORD REVISISLE
Isn’t Senor a Jests fan too?
Buddy, too.
Huh, I heard he was a Bears fan.
Tim Tebow voice: They’re talking about a different thing.
Why is Chiefs-Raiders still being shown on live television? Is there not a perhaps slightly closer game that could be shown?
It’s now on RedZone, too. So they could tell us HOW HARD MAXX CROBDY PLAYS
You spelled MAXXX CROSBY wrong.
Hippo might be sleep deprived. And high obvs.
Look more closely.
Someone needs to fill out an FCC complaint form.
Andy Reid wouldn’t be Andy Reid if he wasn’t calling pass plays on first down while leading by 29 points in the second half.
If Britt Reid was OK to drive after 29 drinks then Andy is OK passing after 29 points.
Some day modern science will bring us a fat that you don’t have to leave on the counter for 6 years for it to count as “softened.” Maybe they could partially hydrogenate something…
Derek Carr is in the red zone-the refrain from “Bela Lugosi’s Dead” echoes in his helmet…
It’s funny how KC’s kicker can hit a 54 yarder and the Raiders guy can’t even make an extra point.
The Chiefs have 38 points in the 3rd quarter and Kelce has none of those? I call shenanigans.
None for Hill, either.
And now the damn thing works again, just when my old laptop finished updating and gave the stupid fire stick some competition. I hope a modern version of the Challenger explosion takes out Bezos and Musk
I was unaware of the byes the last week of FF, will note that next year.
This fucking day.
Last night we got a little rain, and Lady LemonJello’s Griswaldian outdoor light display got knocked out. After a little investigating, I find none of the breakers are tripped, but now I’ve got the master bath outlets offline, the outlet for the garage fridge is out as well as the outside outlets (front & back of house). The solution? A GFI outlet tripped in the unfinished bathroom in the basement! Who the actual fuck has all those above mentioned outlets on the same circuit? Christ in a pedal-powered sidecar!
And the rotten cherry on the shit sundae that is today? I get to spend my evening at Kings Dominion “enjoying” their Winterlights extravaganza! “Crowds! Driving I-95! My anxiety being triggered! Fun for one and all!” Fuck.
That sounds unpleasant. Can you fake a positive Covid test?
Who knew that Gruden was that good of a coach?
In all seriousness, their record got better every single season – and was on pace to keep improving this year as well.
Jeebus Christ! In Hippo’s money league the Browns D has me 30 points so far.
Boooooooooooo!
When I’m not 99% favored to win I’m 61% favored to win.
Christ, Sean Payton really got goddamned fat.
He is living mass
I had no idea he was from the Andy Reid coaching
treebuffet.Let he who is without cellulite cast the first twinkie
Eating his feelings. Gotta be tough to coach two QB assholes, and the one that is the worst at his position is the only healthy one.
Seems like Taysom hill is still 💩
Also is Chubb gonna do anything??
Chubb isn’t going to do very much without KHunt around.
That’s SMRT, get Tyreek Hill hurt, up 32 goddamned points at home.
I’m in favor of whatever gets Tyreek Hill hurt.
Uncle Ed said, “We really should have more diversity in the coaching community. I have so many ethnic and racial slurs that I am dying to use on them”
Is it possible for there to be a 4-way tie in the AFCN, all 9-8 and PIT 8-7-2??
I’ll tell you what, you haven’t lived until you’ve had a 4-way at Skyline Chili. I still think those girls Kenyon Martin brought gave me herpes
Was probably the toilet seat.
Don’t count out the chili itself as the source.
Bluebunny has so far put his ice cream sammo where his mouth is.
…I mean, he’s ALWAYS done that, but like for reals.
the figurative done synched up with the literal!