Saturday “No I Don’t Care About THAT Game” Thread

Trust me, every ESPN platform will BEG one to watch, but Hippo ain’t doing it.

At the time of this here posting, I am watching NC State losing 21-6 at home to Notre Dame.  I would be annoyed enough if this was football.  But it’s just shameful in hoops.  23-6 now.

Today, we learned that Frank Lampard’s Everton are indeed much improved with just a bit of positivity mixed in.  West Ham and Chelski each get out of gaol in Extra Time.  Brighton do not show up for class away to Spurs.  Burnley and Watford played to the saddest, wettest nil-nil one could ever see.  It was just what a Toffee supporter wanted.

If only I had remembered to forget that my Wolven Sort were playing.  The TEAM managed to forget, FFS.

ESPN does have two actual, good ballgames on tonight – Kenfucky at Roll Damn Tide (8:00) and Gonzaga at Original Recipe Big Love (10:00).  I mean, if you’re into that sort of thing.

There is also a triple header of SexiMexi tonight, check your local Mexi-listings (likely TUDN, too lazy to look up), starting at 6p EST.

Fucking low pressure system dropped North Cakalaky temperatures by 30 degrees and gave Hippo a huge motherfucker of a migraine, so you may be on your own tonight.  Hey, it’s down to 23-10!

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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rockingdog

LOL

Just saw something very important

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Doktor Zymm

Maybe, if you’re sitting in the bulkhead, don’t bring a shitton of carryon, and don’t complain when someone else sitting in bulkhead stows a tiny purse in a small amount of space you had mentally but not physically claimed next to your other giant bags

TheRevanchist

You should tell the flight attendants you saw that person spending a lot of time at the bar before the flight. You noticed him because he kept harassing the bartender and waitress.

Doktor Zymm

They also complained about how long the jet bridge was when deplaning. Dude was just unpleasant.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I always take consolation in knowing that for people like that *everything* is unpleasant. Like, their whole life sucks and is unsatisfying.

yeah right

Hola!

I promised a complete report earlier.

It got to 72 degrees and I walked next to these ridiculous yachts. Like dick measuring yachts.

Earlier I hoped I could get a glimpse of Catalina.

It was right there. Give me a long enough boardwalk and I could walk there.

And it was fucking gorgeous. Got a good tree four miles in.

Came home and fired up the test kitchen.

You have no idea!!!

/ cackles maniacally

Last edited 2 years ago by yeah right
Gumbygirl

Are we gonna gravy soon?

yeah right

Very soon.

Brick Meathook

I’m out of bay leaves. This bottle only lasted ten years.

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ballsofsteelandfury

Turkish! FANCY!!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

A “turkish fancy” sounds like something J. Edgar Hoover would order while he was on a sex tourism vacation in Morrocco.

Gumbygirl

I use a lot of them. I think the oldest spice/herb I have is cinnamon.

Brick Meathook

Luge would be much better if the track had 360° vertical loops and also Evel Knievel style jumps over school buses, each jump getting longer and longer. All of these features would have to be approached at the exact right speed or the sled would explode in a fireball of destruction.

litre_cola
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Drinking a stout and eating samoas, hope I can go to bed in the next hour

SonOfSpam

Better than eating a stout Samoan?

litre_cola

We talkin cookie or dude?

Gumbygirl

Booooo, the Russian.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

This poor Canadian skater is having a disastrous run. I think it’s safe to assume nobody will score worse, so he really should have just skipped the rest of his routine and hit the bar.

Gumbygirl

Yeah, that was…not good. The Chinese guy wasn’t much better, but he has a ginormous quad.

Senor Weaselo

What would Brian Boitano do? Not that.

Gumbygirl

He sure as fuck wouldn’t be caught dead in the Jesus Christ Superstar costume the Russian guy wore. Was that a crown of thorns around the collar? Ugh.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I don’t want to start any blasphemous rumors…

Senor Weaselo

Advantages of rabbis to bishops: I assume the rabbi is not limited to the same color as their starting square.

Redshirt

I just had an argument with my 11 year old niece for me suggesting the word “is” as a verb in MadLibs.

Welcome to my life.

Doktor Zymm

But…that’s like THE verb

Bogdanski

The first verb: “To be!”

Gumbygirl

Or not.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

You have some kind of problem with the verb “bungle”?

Redshirt

Yes, because it should be spelled “bungal”.

Bogdanski

It depends what the definition of “is” is

ballsofsteelandfury

Spanish version:

ballsofsteelandfury

Why can’t I embed a YouTube video???

ballsofsteelandfury
Don T

¡Oh sí!

litre_cola

Litrepug does not want to hear me talk about Radiohead.

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Doktor Zymm

Why are you talking when you could be tummyrubbing??

litre_cola

How good is Amnesiac? Yes, boy, that’s a good pug. Better than Hail to the thief, no boy, you’ve had too much wine.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I don’t listen to Radiohead much these days, but I probably listened to Pablo Honey more times than any other of their albums.

litre_cola

For me, The Bends is my go to. I am a radiohead guy as they changed the way I listened to music. OK Computer was amazing.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fHiGbolFFGw

Redshirt

https://www.cnn.com/2022/02/05/media/joe-rogan-racial-slur-apology-india-arie/index.html

The Joe Rogan Experience just experienced a loss of cabin pressure.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Pfft. His listeners will be more upset at him for apologizing than they will be for any of the racial slurs that he used.

BugEyedBoo

What kind of fucking world do we live in if Joe Rogan gets $100 million for fucking up my interwebs? I thought that Bored Ape NFT bullshit was the height of pissing away money, then we get this.

Redshirt

Ah, the Luge. Lying on a sled, going 70-80 mph nuts first in a hunt for glory.

Doktor Zymm

I went luging in Michigan once! It was slightly above freezing though so the track was slow, plus we were only going from the lowest start so we only got up to 20mph or so.

Senor Weaselo

I did the Alpine Slide once in Colorado. Well, twice. The first time I lifted for a moment, so I had to do it again with the acceleration lever throughout.

I didn’t crash!

Game Time Decision

The crazy’s: how about we go head first

/skeleton

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[sees Olympic athlete from Westport, CT]

[shakes fist at television set]

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Of course she has a Prada snowboard.

Last edited 2 years ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Horatio Cornblower

My son, who has lived in CT his entire life, had no idea where Westport was. I said “It’s in the southwest corner, and all you need to know about that town is that there’s about a 90% chance that, of you hear someone is from Westport, they’ve called the cops because a Black person was getting gas within city limits.”

Don’t get me started on Darien.

Senor Weaselo

Is it an unearthed I Love Lucy episode?

Last edited 2 years ago by Senor Weaselo
rockingdog

Last Funny;

Hahaha!

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

/Horatio cracks open another beer

Horatio Cornblower

I mean, you’re not wrong, but that isn’t why.

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Doktor Zymm

Lol, checking in to my SFO-JFK flight before I’ve boarded SFO-SEA-JFK

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I hate checking into the return before the departure leaves

Doktor Zymm

Not actually a bad thing in this case, it’s a fun trip and a long enough flight to get decent sleep. Plus Alaska has good food and all my legs were upgraded

BrettFavresColonoscopy

“Braggart”
–Lt. Dan

Senor Weaselo

HI DOK! I’m in Brooklyn on a gig so I can’t pick you up, sorry.

Doktor Zymm

I’m going to the pop art thing at Bergdorf’s

rockingdog

Found a funny;

There should be other types of shanties besides sea. Let’s get some shanties for people who work at Sunglass Hut

Doktor Zymm

Hill shanties for hill people!

Redshirt

.

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Doktor Zymm

Better living through math!

Horatio Cornblower

Me: Damn, this drink has way too much of a gin taste.

My Son: There’s no such thing.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Lady BFC has proclaimed we are done with curling for the evening

Horatio Cornblower

Just in time for snowboarding!

scotchnaut

I’ve been told that waxing takes even longer.

Gumbygirl

Noodles needs a scritch. He told me, and I am fluent in cat.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh, cool! Can you translate what Jay is trying to say to us here?

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Last edited 2 years ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Horatio Cornblower

DOOOOOOOOOOOON’T CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE!!

Gumbygirl

It’s hard to say. He’s not as intelligible as a cat.

Brick Meathook

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scotchnaut

Dude from North Calalacky: [hits 3 pointer that gets team within 18 points of Duke]

Crowd: [goes nuts]

Horatio Cornblower

On the one hand I love seeing North Carolina get annihilated. On the other hand…Duke.

scotchnaut

Look, I would love for you to hate on UNC but that doesn’t mean you have to love on Duke.

scotchnaut

Duke absolutely crushing UNC on their home court. Love it!

TheRevanchist

The ROC women’s hockey team isn’t that good without some quality Russian PEDs.

Horatio Cornblower

I will bet you 1 million rubles that this game ends 5-0

/It’s a replay

Horatio Cornblower

I’ll have to get my Loonies abacus out.

scotchnaut

[sighs] It’s four moose antlers in the fall and three in the spring. How many times do I have to go through this?

Brick Meathook

I’ve had a busy morning devoted to in-depth house cleaning.

I cleaned the top of the refrigerator with 409 and two rags, plus cleaned all my cookbooks neatly stored up there. I am not coked out. A lot more to do.

Can’t wait for the end of the day.

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Last edited 2 years ago by Brick Meathook
litre_cola

Note. There is a lot of Cavalry gear within DFO. I thank you all for welcoming it.

Horatio Cornblower

I can speak to the quality of the scarf.

litre_cola

That’s our supporters group. A supreme bunch of interesting people.

litre_cola

Nice scarf. Note, I have not woken up my family and am now done the wine. Well, current wine.

TheRevanchist

I just bought a margarita mix for next weekend. If I am the only one drinking here, what is a decent tequila that won’t set me back too much in the wallet? I will already be spending too much on a AirBnB.

Doktor Zymm

Honestly, if you’re going with premade marg mix, you probably want something cheap with a bite to cut the sugar. Nothing better than bog standard Cuervo

TheRevanchist

Cool. Used this advice and I bought some. I bought the “light” mix, so it’s not many calories or sugar. Also bought some beer salt lime flavor to give it a try. Thanks, Zymm.