Good morning folks!
Happy Selection Sunday!
Closing in on NCAA Tournament time so we’ve got another little distraction in the goddamn insanely long offseason. I’m a fan of the tourney and it will occupy some of my sports watching attention for a couple of weeks.
Whatever it takes, man!
But the best news of the past week was….
BASEBALL IS BACK!
Yes, I’m an old timey baseball guy. How old timey?
FUCK THE DESIGNATED HITTER!
How’s that?
Now we have it in both leagues and there are going to be like 75 teams in the playoffs. Why don’t they all get participation trophies instead?
Pansies.
I’m still happy to have the game back though.
So?
That banner pic caught your eye, didn’t it?
How the fuck could it not? I mean, just look at that glorious fucking thing!
Holy shit!
Not sure how the rest of the country serves or names their Mexican food since I think it might be borderline insane to actually consume Mexican food outside of the Southwestern United States or Mexico.
We are definitely spoiled by our proximity to the real enchilada out here. So to speak.
That glorious plate of awesomeness is a “Chunky beef burrito” and the fact that it’s covered in sauce and cheese means it’s “Wet.” One would order it as a “Chunky beef burrito wet” or as the title of this post alludes just order it by the menu number. I call this the “Number 12” because my favorite local Mexican place “El Tarasco” listed this as a #12 on their menu. That’s the original El Tarasco in El Segundo for additional clarification.
The number 12 is a big ass tortilla filled with slow cooked chunks of roast beef, not ground beef mind you, real chunks of roast beef, then a spoonful of refried beans, finally it’s covered in a rich sauce, or gravy even, covered with cheese and delivered to you with chips and salsa.
It is stupid good.
It is also a food coma waiting to happen.
I’ve got an employee of mine who has one of these every few months because the restaurant is real close to work. He inevitably eats the whole thing and then comes back from lunch with glassy eyes, a slight waddle in his walk and a complete lack of energy or ambition for the rest of the day.
It’s an afternoon wrecker for sure.
The beef in the recipe we’re doing today has indeed been made here before back in 2016 or “Season 2” of Sunday Gravy. It’s also one of my personal favorite recipes for anything ever.
It’s called carne guisada and it’s essentially a slow roasted beef stew with Southwest spices and good lord almighty does it produce some of the tenderest, beefiest, succulent servings of cow anywhere on this fucking planet.
Quick point of Parliamentary Procedure: The actual reason I cooked this roast wasn’t even specifically for todays recipe! It was intended for what will be next weeks Sunday Gravy. I needed some beef but not this entire slab so I came up with the idea for this meal while I was at it!
That’s a little insight into what the inside of my mind looks like.
I’ll walk you through the entire prep on how to build this beast if you’re ready.
And for the record? Yes I did indeed eat the whole fucking thing in one sitting.
Carne Guisada.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees
Get a 2-3 pound slab of chuck roast
2 1/2 cups of beef stock. Store bought is fine
1 large onion chopped
4-5 celery stalks chopped
5-6 cloves of garlic minced
3-4 jalapenos, stem and seeds removed and chopped.
2 tablespoons of tomato paste
1/4 cup of flour
2-3 tablespoons of vegetable oil
1 tablespoon salt
1 tablespoon of ground black pepper
1 teaspoon of ground cumin
2 teaspoons of chili powder
This baby starts out by procuring a big-ass slab of beefy goodness.
Goddamn right that prices have gone up. Obviously that’s my favorite cut, the chuck roast. We’ll hack it up ourselves so we can dictate the size of the beef chunks.
Instead of a standard mire poix this recipe calls for a bit more zing substituting jalapenos for the carrot.
Leave the seeds in for a bit more kick.
Get the onion action going hot and heavy.
The process begins by flouring up our meaty bits. And getting them into a preheated pot along with a couple of tablespoons of cooking oil.
Then browning them.
Season with salt and pepper as you brown.
Cook in batches to avoid overcrowding the pan.
Then it’s time to collect and measure the beef stock.
Let’s finish browning all of the meat.
Then add in the tomato paste.
This allows us to scrape up all of the browned meat chunks or “fond” and also kind of sort of deglaze the pan and such.
Add the veggies to the tomato paste and give them a good stir to coat all of the veggies.
Get that meat back into the pan along with the garlic and cover with the beef stock. This is also the time to add in the cumin, chili powder and black pepper. Give the stock a taste and season with salt if needed.
Place a lid on this wonderfulness and get it into the preheated 350 oven.
About 2 and 1/2 hours ought to do the trick.
The smell will drive you to the brink of insanity and it kicks in real early too to prolong the agony while patiently waiting for this to cook.
Let’s get a look when done.
Oh hell yes.
You know you want some.
Again, it’s not unheard of for the cook to grab a spoon or fork and just commence to shoveling. Remember though! Two meals from this so use restraint.
HAH!
Take the meat out of the pot and set aside. Let the juices, veggies and the rest of the cooking ingredients cool.
Now for the fun part!
Transfer the cooking ingredients – not the meat! – to a blender. And give it a whirl. Use some of the leftover beef stock to get this to the desired consistency.
Let’s pause a moment to reflect on this insanely delicious “gravy” that we just made.
I’ve never tasted the likes of it. It’s got a solid note of beefy flavor right off the bat, the texture is silky smooth and the hit from the chili powder/cumin/jalapeno is fucking legendary.
This is one of the best gravies I’ve ever made and I’ve made some motherfucking gravies man! Shit, you know!
I will be repeating this gravy before the season is over because I had a Jesus-sized epiphany on a crazy idea for another use.
File that away for future reference.
To make a burrito of the size and stature of this one, you will need to acquire one big-ass tortilla.
To make a proper “Number 12” you will need to apply a liberal layer of beans to the tortilla. Followed by as much meaty goodness as you think you can handle.
Face it people. You WILL destroy this damn thing. You will also feel pain and probably a bit of self disgust but it will be so worth it.
Finally ladle on the gravy and coat with cheese. If the gravy has cooled pop this back in a hot oven for a few minutes to reheat the sauce and melt the cheese.
I like to grab some restaurant style tortilla chips followed immediately with the loosening of the belt.
You already know how this ends don’t you?
Sure you do.
It starts with this being insanely, ridiculously delicious and your brain then short circuits while you began destroying the burrito by the forkful.
Don’t try to eat this with your hands people, is what I guess I’m saying. Use the tortilla chips to get some of the sauce and any stray chunks of beef.
So fucking delicious.
The next thing you know you’ve hit the “food wall” and realize you’re close to fucking stuffed but this shit just tastes so damn good!
You reach the halfway point thinking “Maybe I can save the rest for later. Yeah! That’s the ticket.”
Then you proceed to take a couple of more bites.
You start sweating, your belly is groaning a bit right now but goddammit you can’t stop eating it! Two thirds of the way through you begin to wonder first if you will be able to eat the whole thing and second if that last bit of burrito is even worth the trouble of wrapping up for later.
Your brain then comes to the inevitable conclusion of?
Destroy the evidence!
Then against any form of normalcy, self restraint or intellect you go ahead and eat the entire thing.
I know you.
This has happened before.
You’ve subsequently reached the state of a food coma but you are, in a way, kind of fucking proud of yourself too.
God DAMN was that good!
You’ve also destroyed any chance you had left of being productive for the rest of the entire day.
Oh yes folks. This is indeed the good shit. Top shelf shit.
Will haunt your dreams shit.
This will make it more difficult than ever to convince you good folks that I REALLY DO EAT HEALTHY DURING THE WEEK I SWEAR TO GOD!!!
What I won’t do is apologize for dropping this recipe on you. I know most of you folks really do believe it when I say how stupefyingly delicious something is and this here motherfucker is right at the top of the stupid delicious list.
Hopefully y’all are intrigued enough to come back next week to find out just what the fuck we’re going to do with the other portion of this slow roasted beefy goodness.
Hope you do come back because it’s a goddamn beautiful recipe all on it’s own.
Thanks for joining us today. I appreciate each and every one of you for tuning in each week.
May your favorite college hoops-ball team have a favorable tourney bracket.
Be safe out there everybody.
PEACE!
I can’t tell you how many times I think about flouring up my meaty bits
I got a gigantic flannel shirt, like 3x the size of any reasonably sized shirt. It goes past my knees. Only problem is it is kind of scratchy, this is some sort of fraudulent flannel!
So it’s a wool, plaid dress?
With no tailoring and way too much fabric and giant buttons
I thought Gene Steratore was a NFL referee. Why is he the expert on CBB?
Purdue is struggling a bit vs Ioway but I think they’ll be a tough matchup for any team in the tourney.
Iowa looks like one of those 5-6 seeds that loses in the first round, or goes to the Elite Eight.
Afternoon funny;
Radio Shack was smart as hell to transition to shakes.
The Radio Shake in my town was only in business for maybe six months. The majority of folks shook their radios at home.
Looks like Scott Hall’s entrance music is being queued up for Heaven’s Royal Rumble.
Scott Hall life support LIVE news – WWE wrestler ‘Razor Ramon’ fighting for life after ‘suffering three heart attacks’ (thesun.co.uk)
I’ve got two dogs by the name of Molly and Ruby-they’re very territorial. Except for when they aren’t. A demonstration-
Raccoon: “Bark, bark, bark!”
Chipmunk: “Bark, bark, bark!”
Small Bird: “Bark, bark, bark!”
Large Eagle: “B… Um, hey, how you doing? We’re going to go back into the house now.”
Could the eagle take the pups? Litrepug is double the size of Oxipug but would be a good meal for a bird of prey.
This eagle is huge and perches on lower branches. The one time (that I saw) the girls were barking at it and the eagle leapt off its branch and swooped over them. They ran yelping towards the house like the cowardly bullies that they are.
Your doggos need a pep talk from this feline.
Don’t think it would work currently…
“What did I do wrong?!”
Had balls.
I know the feels.
This game just went to OT!
And Incarnate Wood is going to the Women’s NCAA tournament, something they have never done before, which I’m sure will show when they lose in the first round.
“Congrats! Here’s your reward: South Carolina!”
That was exactly the reaction here when Northern Kentucky University made the Dance a few years ago.
“Enjoy the moment, Norse!!!…at least until Kentucky (proper) takes the court and destroys you.”
Hey, the UMBC Retrievers won a game in only their second appearance, remember how awesome that was? Maybe Incarnate Wood can do even better!
Based on the meaning of those two words individually, I don’t see how they cannot!
When I’m elected Evil Overlord after deposing the fusion of Trump, Putin and that guy that cut me off on I-275 the other day, all College Basketball Conference Tournament Finals will continue to grant the winner an automatic entry into the NCAA Tournament. However, the loser of the game will be disqualified from the NCAA Tournament.
This is a brilliant idea
Watching women’s basketball right now. Incarnate Wood vs SE Louisiana for the Southland conference championship. I’ve never heard of either team, but at least the game has been tight.
(thinking)
DON’TMAKEAJOKEABOUTASSESDON’TMAKEAJOKEABOUTASSESDON’TMAKEAJOKEABOUTASSESDON’TMAKEAJOKEABOUTASSESDON’TMAKEAJOKEABOUTASSESDON’TMAKEAJOKEABOUTASSESDON’TMAKEAJOKEABOUTASSESDON’TMAKEAJOKEABOUTASSES
The team is actually called Incarnate Word, but I think Wood makes it more fun.
Wood makes a lot of things more fun
Man, every idea from today is a ripoff from an original idea from the past.
Original Log Commercial | The Ren & Stimpy Show | NickRewind – YouTube
It’s better than bad, it’s good!
This should be the slogan for ED medication. Forget the “weird outdoor bathtubs” commercials, just have a bare-chested guy sweating and chopping wood, and then cuddling up in front of the fire with his wife, while the voiceover guy says “wood makes a lot of things more fun.”
How many outdoor bathrubs have you all encountered in your lives? Not including hot tubs, legitimate bath tubs.
I’ve seen some used as planters, but none used for waterless bathing (those ED commercial bathtubs never have water in them!)
In our new house, I am converting the small front yard to planters this summer!!!
Zero, but I used to live in a beach house that had an outdoor shower (with hot water). It was divine.
Completely agree! I lived behind a hostel in Port Douglas in a tent village, Aus and same thing, was superb.
When they grow up maybe they’ll get to be kidnapped in Russia while playing in the WNBA offseason!
Incarnate Wood, heh, that was my nickname in college! Heyoo!
…If they had allowed nicknames at my college…
Sports Gods: “THE BENGALS MADE THE SUPER BOWL. A SACRIFICE IS DEMANDED UPON CINCINNATI SPORTS FANS FOR THIS SACRILEGE!”
(reads up on Cincinnati Reds offseason moves)
Sports Gods: “NEVERMIND. THEY ARE CURSING THEMSELVES!“
I’d try this, minus the celery.
Damn, I love my fireplace so much-just like my dad did
True Story:
My stepmother couldn’t stand a natural wood-burning fireplace because it was ‘messy’. (she’s a clean freak) She always said that at some point she would convert it to a gas-burning unit. And she did so, while my dad was on his deathbed. (he was there for 3-4 months or so) She pointed that out to him during his last few days. A completely vile piece of shit, she is.
Her changing the fireplace gave you and your dad enough time to change the will so all she got was a wood-burning fireplace.
GO SPIDERS
“Ahh, now that’s brilliant filmmaking!” — Jon Peters
Rescheduled my canceled IST-DBV flight, did my taxes, took out the trash, cleaned up the dishes I left in the sink 3 weeks ago, and called my parents. Not bad for before noon on a Sunday!
As Buzz Williams ages he looks more and more like Bruce Pearl.*
*Commence Irrational Hatred Mode
THIS CURLING MATCH, I CALL IT JACK TRIPPER AT THE REAGLE BEAGLE, BECAUSE THERE’S A LOT OF SINGLES BEING SCORED
Here’s how the women’s MVC Championship is described on my tv up here.
“NCAA: (Women) TBD vs TBD
Sports. team vs team”
Line: TBD by -5.5
I see that your chuck roast was procured some time ago, which is tragic because it went on sale a couple weeks ago. I made mine into beef stew.
Leicester just brought on a player from “Zambia”. How many times do I need to correct these announcers! The correct name of that geographical region is Northern Rhodesia!
It’s these woke mobs Sir. Haven’t seen anything like it since Omdurman.
There’s a University of The Incarnate Word? They’re The Cardinals? Fuck. Right. Off.
I believe it’s an NAIA school in Texas, and I think I know that because of one of the ‘Last Chance U’ seasons.
Amazing what you can learn on a treadmill.
My word, I haven’t heard of a Turk handling a ball like that since my Southern European colleagues returned from their time in a Turkish prison. Onward to glory, Water Pistols!
I don’t think that’s a handball, although certainly not for lack of trying.
Princeton/Yale: An Ivy League final that doesn’t involve a cheating and/or bribery scandal. Yet.
Their combined endowment funds are a mere 75 billion or so.
Princeton? Good clown college, that.
https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTmvZgibY_aIxnJeH7TOLyaukp2aC5e03EWQQ&usqp=CAU
Huh, I apparently paid $4.45 in taxes to Chile last year
Goddammit, and I still owe a $18 underpayment penalty. Stupid government.
I hate that. I’m paying you now, in full. Fuck off with that “you didn’t give me enough of it earlier” nonsense.
“That’s nothing compared to the price I paid eating Skyline chili last year.”
-Redshirt
Man, Lord Rhodes hasn’t seen a save like that since Rork’e’s Drift.
Onward Water Pistols!
Exceptional comparison, my good man! Those Zulus had no idea that such a small force could be so difficult to overcome!
Can’t imagine what recent events would have made then so confident.
Went down a wormhole last night and found this. I have questions for Angelinos about the prevalence of this sub culture.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkGvInBy_c8
There’s a large Korean population here that also carries some of the same themes. Very easy to find just by taking in a game at Dodger Stadium.
And the King’s African Water Pistols strike first with a thunderous header from their uncivilized Ghanaian lieutenant! I look forward to hanging one of these fox pelts on the wall in my parlour!
PSA: Most vodkas sold in the US are not Russian, even Stoli is Latvian, so no need to boycott if you want to support Ukraine!
Viva Titos!
I’ll take “overly dramatic but largely ineffective actions designed to drum up support for a deeply unpopular government” for $400, Alex.
What about MiGs? Are they technically non Russian?
(please say yes please say yes)
And here I am upset that McD’s forgot the hash browns in my order.
To the potato juice!
Checking out of reality until the selection show. Hey, at least we won’t have to play the Redshite next year, and Armageddon could always spare the Toffees from relegation.
Hoping for a high seed for NC State, are you?
The women got it going on this year, so ‘yes’.
Why am I awake at the crack o’dawn on a Sunday? Fucking time change, that’s why! Fucking farmers. Fuck them, and their fucking “ooh, we like to see what we’re doing out here in the fields, so we don’t die in a grisly farm equipment accident.” Pussies.
Throws me off more as I get older. Really throws Decilitre off.
It sucks! How is the Pugster? He got the chop the other day, didn’t he? Poor doggo. It should calm his ass down a bit though, so yay for you! Just remember, it would be inappropriate to try that on Deci!
He is better. The 1st night he did not sleep at all and I was up at 1 am and worked both jobs that day. He is back to his goofy pug puppy self. Need Deci to calm the fuck down. I think having a yard in 2 weeks will alleviate that.
When we first got Kruger, he raced back and forth his new home, like he was on PCP. All night, and most of the day – for a solid week.
Luckily, when we moved (about 7 years ago) he just pissed on stuff for awhile. At least we could sleep.
A little scotch on the gums will calm him down now
Wait. What?
I think you’re doing this backwards, did you move your clocks forward by accident?
I got up at 5:40, remembered to change all me clocks within the hour (I have three that don’t auto-jump, stove, microwave, and bedside alarm clock)
I have to do that, but I’m still too salty!
So I’m a squad leader, in charge of 10 dudes. One fall Monday morning, after the “fall back” DST change, a guy in the squad misses PT formation. Shows up late, as we were getting back off the run… he forgot to reset his alarm clock… understandable… the stink eye from me… do not let it happen again! Hurumpf! Unknown at the time, my idiot private is taking note… plotting. The next spring, DST again, idiot private shows up an hour late on Monday for PT formation (in addition to being an idiot, he was my PT weakling, fuckin wuss) trys to blame DST. Jackass… if you had done that… you would have been an hour EARLY! I Eventually got his sorry ass thrown out of the Army. And I can no longer endure a DST without recalling THAT.
Must have been a nightmare knocking the guy out every time you got on a plane as well.
I made sure his silly ass was FAR away from me in the stick. I can deal with a dummy. Its my job to train them. But I dislike dummies who think they are slick.
Pulisic is gonna play!!!
That’s Rockingggg
Goooo Chelsea
Found a funny;
don’t ask me bout no 5 year plan, i live my life day to day like i’m a cartoon character
Oh no Hippo…
Things is bleak as fuck.
Yay! Sunday Gravy is back!
I am having reheated shitty pizza for breakfast, but I can appreciate reading about some cookin’
Very much enjoyed sleeping in my own bed last night, and today I want to get a lot done around the house, as well as catching up on administrative stuff that got delayed by getting stuck in Argentina. But first, gonna play some Civ.
At least we got this on the PA system at half time:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mfI1S0PKJR8
That’s Rockingggg
Highly recommend all of Peter Hook’s books. Joy Division/New Order really were revolutionary.
LOL
Dog gonna have to check that citation…
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skateboarding_dog
Chelski on Sunday morning soccer!!!
That’s Rocking!
Is it? I keed, I keed.
If I supported the tenants in Fulham I indeed would be super pissed that Russian daddy is getting hammered yet its cool that the Saudis just bought the Barcodes.
Saints laying down for the Moose-Hornets is MOST DEFFO NOT rocking
The ghost of who shall not be named.
I like the chuck roast cut, too.
Could do without that evil cheese, mind.
/ducks the rotten veg
I don’t get it, Hippo. Cheese likes YOU! Cheese wants to be your friend. Surrender to the cheesy goodness… Cheeseresistance is futile!
Will indulge with… ZERO… regrets. I’m with you on the weekend spluges Buddy. If we eat right 70% (M-F) of the time… We can have… Oh fuck no… WE DESERVE… our Sunday Gravey. Interestingly I just finished a Mex lunch over here. And am now… happily… LARGE! Buona Dominica Tutti!
Damn that looks delicious!
It really does! Meat meat meaty meat!