Wumbo Wednesday With Weaselo: Tactical Errors

Greetings lizard people. A smarter me would be reporting to you live from the madhouse that is probably Yankee Stadium. See, I got an email yesterday for the weekly Mastercard Monday flash sale for a promo of tonight’s game. And, thinking to myself, “Oh, I wish, but I have a student,” I forgot about it, got home at around 11, and missed my chance for the flash sale that ended at 11:59, forgetting entirely that 1) I could probably resell the ticket for several times whatever I’d pay for it, or 2) I could have just moved the student to Thursday! But nope, didn’t think of that until Tuesday morning, when the time had passed. So, my loss, and I’ll be kicking myself various amounts depending on what happens tonight as Aaron Judge tries to tie the AL record 61 in his assault on the record books and common decency, non-steroids (dear god please be clean) edition. (Going into Wednesday Judge leads all three Triple Crown categories, and the triple slashes, and… god knows what else.) And he hasn’t given up a run this year!

(That joke was too good to pass up.)

Tactical error two, or I guess more execution error: Three people will understand this plight. But with the advent of remote raids in Pokemon Go (thanks to the pandemic), there’s been waiting sites to queue up for raids. This week or so, there’s been a Northern/Southern Hemisphere split between the two current legendary Pokemon. So… I managed (for the second time) to get myself kicked out of the waiting queue because it auto does that after 12 hours, and I guess in the watching of last nights Yankee game I forgot to do that shit. So it took me from approximately 6000th in line (yes, there’s this much of a line) back down to 20,000th.

Pain. Onto the news:

-Players of Week 2: Offense: Tua and Sun God; Defense: Jaylen Watson (KC) and Darius Slay; Special Teams: Brayden “Mann Co.” Mann and Graham Gano, don’t ya know

-3-time Pro Bowl CD Joe Haden signed a one-day contract to retire as a Brown.

-Bruce Arians, now in the front office, was warned for being on the white stripe during the Bucs-Saints fight.

-Bills OL Bobby Hart suspended 1 game for taking a swing at a Tits player, and hitting a coach instead.

-Ted Lasso and AFC Richmond will be a playable team in FIFA ’23. No word on Bernard Gilkey and 2105 Pretend Man City.

What’s for sportsin’?

MLB
Important Games
Record/Triple Crown Watch/Clinch Watch
Yinzers vs. Mobsters (PIT vs. NYY, 7:05) (Judge currently leads AVG by .001; needs 1 home run to tie Maris for single-season AL home run record/”clean” record) (NYY can clinch playoff berth with win AND losses by BAL and CWS) (Senor Weaselo can be made fun of accordingly for not going, see above.) (Or not, see below.)
Triple Crown Watch
Fightin’ Hippos vs. Fightin’ Ringworms (STL vs. SD, 9:40) (Goldschmidt trails in average by .008; trails in home runs by 5; trails in RBI by 9… things are looking a little bleaker.)

Red Battle! Sox vs. Legs (BOS vs. CIN, in progress)
Small Bears vs. Large Fish (CHC vs. MIA, in progress)
“Dear you guys,” (HOU vs. TB, in progress)
Sylvester vs. Tweety (DET vs. BAL, 7:05)
Tungsten Arms vs. Celtic (LAA vs. TEX, 8:05)
T-s vs. Paupers (MIN vs. KC, 8:10)
Groots vs. Tony La Russa’s Drunken Leave of Absence (CLE vs. CWS, 8:10)
Rice-a-Roni vs. Rocky Mountain Oysters (SF vs. COL, 8:40)
Moose vs. Elephant (SEA vs. OAK, 9:40)
Deserts vs. Ravines (ARI vs. LAD, 10:10)

Rex Ryan competing on The Amazing Race (CBS, 10/9c)

Yeah, not much.

UPDATE: Hermana Weaselo and I got tickets on StubHub, let’s fucking go! There may be a BotG depending on how this game goes and if anything happens.

Oh, and one more thing:

5 4 votes
Article Rating
Senor Weaselo
Senor Weaselo plays the violin. He tucks it right under his chin. When he isn't doing that, he enjoys watching his teams (Yankees, Jets, Knicks, and Rangers), trying to ingest enough capsaicin to make himself breathe fire (it hasn't happened yet), and scheming to acquire the Bryant Park zamboni.
Subscribe
Notify of
70 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments

[…] last week you may have mentioned I un-errored my tactics and ended up going to the dirtball game last Wednesday night with Hermana Weaselo. Tickets ended up […]

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m pretty hammered now.

Mr. Ayo

Yes, but are you also Armed?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Un. Fucking. Real. (miss you, tWBS)

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ECqlbimpaUI

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Can’t find the clip from Fanning the Fire (surf video) but still a very fine tune.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=58mXxWuUqYw

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Queen Elizabeth’s final request.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5L3nMmlsHF0

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Fuck you, stupid neighbors who are trying to get some sleep.

FIRST WAVE MOTHERFUCKING DOWN

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=J7tLpmfj53g

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

(I actually adore my neighbors, and all the doors and window are shut so I won’t bother them)

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I do love how my animals can sleep through this mess.

Brick Meathook

Just received my authentic Big Lebowski Dude sweater today. Yes yes the movie one was beige but I think the navy one looks nicer on me and it was $100 cheaper, only because no one buys it, according to the website. I bought it in order to pay tribute without being a complete tool.

It’s a “Westerly” sweater and I bought it direct from Pendleton Mills, who make a big point of saying they have been family-owned since 1863 and are headquartered in Oregon. “Headquartered” is the key word, as the sweater was made in China, probably by orphan children slave labor.

As The Dude says: All Hail Chairman Mao! Dissent is counter-revolutionary!

comment image

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Gettin’ drunk, gettin’ shoegazey.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-Q1l4Sz4Hhg

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

God damn do I want to see these guys live again and not go home until there is a trickle of blood coming out of my ears. (seriously listen to this one loud)

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=i3QmrFsMw1w

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Watching “Do Revenge” and the protagonists are talking about doing a “strangers on a train” thing and the Dr. Mrs. was oblivious to the fact that it was a Hitchcock thing.

TheRevanchist

Found out a friend got married. I didn’t know she was that serious about dating anyone. There is only one person I know who was absolutely perfect for her, and her for him. Was it him? Inquiring minds want to know!

Mr. Ayo

Well I’m still not married, so there’s your answer.

TheRevanchist

I guess I can take on a sister wife. Send me your resume and I’ll review within the 5 to 10 business days.

BrettFavresColonoscopy
WCS

comment image

herodotus450

Do you think those are Daphne’s or.. Scoobs’?

Doktor Zymm

But imagine of you ran into that person in real life without any warning that it was a possibility

SonOfSpam

rice rits raggy!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Yeah, the nightmare fuel was sealed when one of the replies was “I would tap dat Shagussy without hesitation”

SonOfSpam

Just need Velma’s glasses to complete the fantasy.

BugEyedBoo

Rex Ryan is a contestant on The Amazing Race. Go fig.

WCS

comment image

I hope something like this happens.

BugEyedBoo

Entirely possible – him and his partner are lost in Munich.

Dunstan

Sounds like they got off on the wrong foot.

WCS

comment image

Just head toward the end zone.

BugEyedBoo

7/12, so we will get more Rex next week.

SonOfSpam

“They told me I’d hafta be on my toes, and brother, I signed on the dotted fuckin line.”

Dunstan

A shame they didn’t get Rob to be his partner.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ugh

Dunstan

That’s what SHE said!

SonOfSpam

Sorry the runner up for MVP to Ohtani didn’t homer for you.

(Kidding…Judge will win and I will grudgingly accept it)

Doktor Zymm

The whole concept of incompetent rock is really amusing. After all, it’s just as good at being rock as any other sort, maybe moreso since it’s been a rock out in the world for so much longer than other rock. We’re just being super judgy and and applying our own standards for what we want rock to do in specific human engineering contexts.

WCS

Five Finger Death Punch and Crazytown are definitive proof of incompetent rock.

Gumbygirl

Gumby likes Five Finger Death Punch. I don’t get it, but whatever?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“I’ll take a glass of five finger death punch. Sounds delicious!” – Justin Blackmon

King Hippo

Nobody rocks harder than Collective Soul…. – Ghost of tWBS

WCS

comment image

King Hippo

goodnight Springton there will be no encore

WCS

You better change that to Green Day before your pill bottle “accidently” falls in the garbage disposal that miraculously turns on at the exact same moment.

BugEyedBoo

Five Finger Death Punch is like Disturbed minus about 25 IQ points. And Disturbed is already kind of dumb. Gotta say, though, Disturbed’s Stricken is one of the best plastic guitar songs ever, on either Rock Band or Guitar Hero. And FFDP’s The Bleeding is such over the top nu-metal horseshit that I actually like it.

Dunstan

George Thoroughgood nods appreciatively.

Dunstan

Hack judge gets overruled by the 11th Circuit.

SonOfSpam

Between this and Morning Tish, pretty good schadenfreude day for non-MAGAts.

And that 3 judge panel was clearly not impressed by hack judge.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The best part was when they were like “we could leave it at this…but we won’t” and kept dumping on her.

Doktor Zymm

It’s certainly possible that there are personal documents among the classified stuff, as it is super easy to classify something. If you put a classified cover sheet on anything, it’s classified. If you put a flash drive in a classified computer, that drive and everything on it, even your shitty smashmouth mp3s, now classified. Trump had all those empty folders- if he put stuff in those that stuff is now classified. HOWEVER, you get a briefing explaining all this, and not paying attention is not a legal excuse, so it’s his own damn fault if he decided to give the government power over any A/C Priv documents

Dunstan

So classification is like cooties?

Doktor Zymm

Pretty much

Doktor Zymm

It can get kind of ridiculous, if you include one piece of information from a secret document into a new document, that whole document becomes secret. If you then cite a totally different piece of information from the new document, say the fact that Cleveland is in Ohio, in a third document, that entire third document becomes classified. I occasionally wonder how much pointless dreck we have in our classified archives

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Pfft. No it’s not.” – Elisha

Gumbygirl

Trump had a no-good horrible rotten day. Damn shame

FdNJF9FXkAYSFAT.jpeg
Redshirt

I won’t celebrate until Trump is wearing orange and behind bars.

Dunstan

You have a better chance of celebrating a Bengals championship.

Doktor Zymm

He’s always wearing orange, so you’re halfway there!

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Can I play as Roy Kent?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m gonna make some guava margaritas tonight, and have salmon tacos.

Dunstan

That’s certainly better than guava tacos and salmon margaritas.

litre_cola

Litrepug would love a Salmon Margarita.

Dunstan

I mean, Litrepug would love another dog’s asshole, I presume, so not sure I trust his taste.

Game Time Decision

Happy Earth, Wind and Fire Day everyone

King Hippo

Thanks, Senor – it’s been many years since I watched, but am DVRing the shit out Rex Ryan’s Amazing WHAT THE FUCK’S HAPPENING BOYS Race!

Gumbygirl

I was singing this song to Gumby a couple of hours ago!

Redshirt

Joe Burrow just pulled an Aaron Rodgers. Not that! Or that!! Or that!!!

https://twitter.com/CincyProblems/status/1572631290117066753?cxt=HHwWgsC8ofD0jdMrAAAA

WCS

“Well, you’re boned.”

— Bender R., NNYC

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

He refused to answer successive phone calls from his father, mother, and then brother?

Redshirt

Not that!!!!