That's right, kids- Uncle Scotchy is...indisposed for the evening. Some people just can't hold their chloroform.
WHICH MEANS that Ol' Reverend Mayhem is driving the train tonight, and he's all hopped up on the Halloween candy Dr. Mrs. Mayhem bought and tried to stash away. CAN'T HIDE THE REESE'S FROM ME,
As we wait for real sports to begin again, one might note that the Most Glorious el Beisbol Cardinals are tied for first in the NL Central. With the Bastard Man Small Bears, who come into #BFIB-land for a three game series, starting tonight. Not that it matters so much
I'm not going to get verbose here.
Wow you guys are sooooooo mean.
It's baseball's opening day. As I type this I'm watching the Yankees kick the shit out of my Orioles. Which isn't a surprise exactly, but I was hoping for a miracle.
A minimum of 120 losses this year. Mark my
Hey, baseball is back. Well, not really. Spring Training is back. Sort of. Do you care about Spring Training? I don't. We're about two weeks away from the start of meaningless games in pajamas, so really baseball stretching is back. Do you want to watch your favorite pitchers and catchers
FACKIN' STEVE PEAHCE AND DAVID PRICE! THIS IS OW-AH FACKIN' YEAHH! NEVAH HAS THEAH BEEN SUCH A FACKIN' INCREDIBLE TEAM. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO[spits dip]OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
/gets called into DFO backroom/dungeon
Mysterious Hooded Figure holding a beer: Dude, WTF?
Mysterious Hooded Figure holding a blunt: What day is it today, asshole?
Balls: Uh, Friday?
MHFH a beer: Seriously?
MHFH a blunt: FFS, it's Monday!! As in MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL!?!?
Balls: You guys know I don't like the NFL, right?
[Slams forehead into desk at office, arousing the suspicion of my coworkers from behind my cubicle walls]
[Takes long drag of a cigarette not caring that I don't smoke, that I'm violating company policy, that I'm still drunk from the night before and have lit the filter end like an
A couple of weeks ago I took my annual, "Well shit I have to use up some vacation time" vacation. I'm a big baseball fan and I took the opportunity to add another MLB stadium to my "visited" list. I've been to 16 current MLB stadiums along with 5 or
I once studied to become a radio DJ in college. It didn’t last, but in that time I saw the light burn out in my classmate's eyes. Many saw this profession as a means of diving into the deep cuts of bands obscure enough to brag about loving. A chance
Heart - noun \ ˈhärt \: a hollow muscular organ of vertebrate animals that by its rhythmic contraction acts as a force pump maintaining the circulation of the blood
And - conjunction \ ən(d)\: used as a function word to indicate connection or addition especially of items within the same class or type —used to join sentence elements
Yup, that's where I went with the title. Because as I mentioned last year, I did have the fortune to go to the 2008 game, and it was a midsummer night's dream to me.
…If you think that joke's bad, wait until I tell you about the piece one of my
Well, the World Cup of Lesser Footy's over. Only four years and four months until Qatar 2022, or for our purposes two years give or take until Euro 2020, taking place in scenic *googles Euro 2020* all over Europe? Seriously? You have to make an entire Eurotrip to go to