Wumbo Wednesday With Weaselo: QAARON’S QAVE WATQH

Man, am I gonna look dumb if he makes a decision between now (it is 11:12 Eastern) and when this goes up. But anyway, the NFL world continues to wait on Aaron Rodgers, who’s come out of his darkness retreat

RIP Charlie Murphy and Rick James.

and didn’t specifically say anything about wanting to stay on the Packers or go to the Jets, but is at least giving a list of requests/demands about who he wants the Jets to go get. Such as Allen Lazard (4 years, $44M). Also on that list: Randall Cobb, Marcedes Lewis, and Odell Beckham, Jr..

I look forward to the Jets getting exactly two of the remaining three on the list, but not getting all three, so no deal. Why? Because that seems like the Jetsiest circumstance. Either that or he plays like five games and then says “fuck it” and retires, right after the king’s ransom kicks in. Again, because potential for maximum Jets. Regardless, my money remains on Zach Wilson starting at least 2 games this season, much to the pain and suffering of anyone who roots for the Jets.

UPDATE: Rodgers said on his favorite non-Rogan podcast the Pat McAfee Show that he wants to play for the Jets this coming season and it’s up to the two teams to work out the accommodations. He was at 90% retiring pre-retreat but over the course of that things changed with what he believed was the Packers’ stance.

Okay, what about non-Rodgers news?
Eagles to release CB Darius “Big Play” Slay.
TE Hayden Hurst to Carolina.
ILB Cole Holcomb to Pittsburgh.
OT Riley Reiff to New England.
Dallas picks up CB Stephon Gillmore from Colts, re-sign LB Leighton Vander Esch.
RB David Montgomery to Detroit.
OLB Arden Key to Tennessee.

And now sports:
JV Basketball Pre-Madness: First Four Part 2
(It is my opinion that the First Four does not count as the NCAA Tournament.)
16 seeds: Fairleigh Dickinson vs. Texas Southern (6:40, TruTV)
11 seeds: Nevada vs. Pitchforks (Arizona State) (9:10, TruTV)

Hunt for Team 69 (nice): NIT, Round 1
Central Florida @ General Florida (7:00, ESPN2)
Virginia Tech @ Fightin’ Redshirts (local edition) (9:00, ESPN2)
Tweaker Matchup! UC Irvine vs. Monald Muck (11:00, ESPN2)

Varsity Basketball
Continuous Process vs. Less of Missing LeBron (PHI vs. CLE, 7:30, ESPN)
Super Splash Bros. Melee vs. Basketball Chargers (GS vs. LAC, 10:00, ESPN)

Not the Big City Greens Classic but still hockey
You Won Your Cup Last Year vs. 67ers (COL vs. TOR, 7:00, TNT)
Call of the Wild vs. 32nd Notes (MIN vs. STL, 9:30, TNT)

World Baseball Classic
Puerto Rico vs. Dominican Republic: Winner moves to quarterfinals, loser goes home (7:00, FS1)
United States vs. Colombia: United States advances with win; Colombia would… maybe need help depending on CAN-MEX before press time? (10:00, FS1)

That may be everything that matters for now, so go laugh at Rutgers for losing to Hofstra last night!

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Senor Weaselo
Senor Weaselo plays the violin. He tucks it right under his chin. When he isn't doing that, he enjoys watching his teams (Yankees, Jets, Knicks, and Rangers), trying to ingest enough capsaicin to make himself breathe fire (it hasn't happened yet), and scheming to acquire the Bryant Park zamboni.
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Don T

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ballsofsteelandfury

ASU kicked Nevada’s ass. Not a bad start.

Mr. Ayo

Aww man, almost a goalie fight. Stupid refs, get out of the way.

Redshirt

If ever a referee deserved a stay in a Penalty Box…

Redshirt

Aaron Rodgers is an asshole!

(sees Super Bowl XLV replay is on NFL Network – trigger warning for the Pittsburgh Steelers contingent of DFO)

Aaron Rodgers is an okay guy!

“You make a persuasive argument, Fry!” (Futurama) – YouTube

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Evening. I can’t wait for the Jets to get the Jetsiest Rodgers that ever Rodgered.

blaxabbath

Peak Rogers

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blaxabbath

Not saying it matters but i bet Belichik is qualuding the night away planning for Rodgers 2x on a cursed team next season.

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Rodgers is the West Coast Fav-rah, and he’ll be signing with the Vikes this time next year.

King Hippo

The Darkness Baron!

Dunstan

“I don’t like where this is going….” — Jenn Sterger

“Me neither.” — people of Mississippi

Redshirt

Bengals got Ex-Chiefs OT Brown. Wait a minute, the Bengals actually did something?!

Al Gore Celebrating – YouTube

BugEyedBoo

This might turn me into a hockey fan.

https://youtu.be/Bh4sH3RE-eo

Redshirt

Wow, Shoemaker Center is rocking tonight. Nice to know Cincinnati is enjoying what home playoff games it can get…that or UC’s faithful was realistic in their expectations and is happy with an NIT 1st Round home game.

EDIT: Nevermind, Xavier (UC’s crosstown rival) won the NIT last year. That’s why they showed up for this.

Last edited 1 year ago by Redshirt
WCS

(PTSD intensifies)

— Bill Gramatica, parts unknown

SonOfSpam

That was fucking tragic and hilarious.

Don T

How Celebrations Ruin Careers is a popular HR seminar in PR. Dutifully skipped #Obvio

SonOfSpam

Just wrap it in some of those paper towels we gave you.

(I don’t own Diaz so this is ok)
(Also, it sucks)

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

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But not in 2023.

Horatio Cornblower

With Edwin Diaz being wheeled off the field with either a torn ACL or Achilles suffered during the celebration. Or, because he’s a Met, probably both.

Don T

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King Hippo

LIBRE!!!!!

blaxabbath

Boooo Texas!!!!

Redshirt

This. This is how I want my obituary and funeral to be. Either be happy I’ve gone to Heaven, be happy I lived or be happy I’m dead.

Daughter celebrates late father with hilariously sarcastic obituary: ‘Redneck SOB’ (msn.com)

Last edited 1 year ago by Redshirt
King Hippo

No daughter. THAT HE KNEW ABOUT!!!

Horatio Cornblower

I’m not sure I want either at 62.

Don T

His father, Kenneth Joseph Pluhar, Sr, is still around, though, and was sure to teach Kenne the best ways to be emotionally unavailable and yet overly sensitive, all rolled into one. It’s a strong family trait passed down generation to generation.

Dear prodigy:

We have a longstanding blog whose tagline is “Sign in or Whatever”

Last edited 1 year ago by Don T
Brick Meathook

Stereo phonograph record and stylus (magnified):

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Don T

Bitchin’ solo ——>

blaxabbath

Russian Disinformation

TheRevanchist

Baker Mayfield, starting QB for the Bucs. I guess they deserve that fate.

WCS

Watch Baker have a better season than Qaron.

blaxabbath

Frankie “Fivehead” Collins

WCS

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THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE

Last edited 1 year ago by WCS
litre_cola

I gets no first four games.

King Hippo

Nobody gets ’em, but they keep playing and televising this tripe every year.

Redshirt

In my heart, I always knew Mike Brown would want to close the Bengals Playoff Window early because he was worried about a draft.

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ballsofsteelandfury

Might watch the ASU game. Need to scout for next year’s AVN Awards….

WCS

Just jerk off. You don’t have to justify, explain, or give us “excuses” for what you’re doing.

Redshirt

No, you want to scout out the films first. You don’t need to add to your shame by wanking (or jilling) to a substandard video.

Last edited 1 year ago by Redshirt
WCS

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Whatever. Just move past it.

TheRevanchist

Just watch the highlight reel. A full movie might get you blisters on all the wrong skin.

Last edited 1 year ago by TheRevanchist
herodotus450

This seems like a good time to remind the good people of Puerto Rico who signs their checks and provides valuable paper towel supplies in times of need….

King Hippo

It’s too bad theys in different tournaments b/c Oral Bob really should play Morehead State

WCS

That’s like 46 different sins to the student population and alumni base of Oral Bob.

King Hippo

#ForbiddenFruit (no ofence)

Don T

Dominican homer gets statesman sash.

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Apruebo.

Don T

Vázquez hit a homer AND he put on a blazer before celebrating in the dugout.

comment image

Two thoughts:
1. Baseball purists are bores. Fun and rivalry tops everything.
2. Yeah, keep traveling to Lesser Antilles 🤣😝

WCS

“Baseball isn’t about fun. It’s about tradition and being polite in the Quiet Car.”

— Peter K., NY

Game Time Decision

And allllllll about the unwritten rules

WCS

/Terry Francona nods in drunken stupor
//collides with parked car

Don T

VIENE PUERTO RICOOOOOOOO
🇵🇷 🇵🇷 🇵🇷 🇵🇷 🇵🇷 🇵🇷 🇵🇷 🇵🇷 🇵🇷 🇵🇷

Gumbygirl

I’m curious, why would you use “Viene” here? Does it mean “come on?”

Don T

“come” in English. It’s in Spanish imperative tens
/cums in grammar pedantry

Last edited 1 year ago by Don T
Gumbygirl

Ahhhh. I have trouble with usage that isn’t 100% what they teach in class. Colloquialisms kick my ass.

King Hippo

My fookin’ Ingles is muy mal enuff. Despite getting As in high school Español, Hippo has retained only un poco.

Don T

Too formal. Or bossy. Not Caribbean enough.

King Hippo

Yadi! YADI!!!!!