Cleveland’s Not Yet N Sync: Ain’t No Lie, Browns At Bye

Remember when everyone thought the Browns would be good this year? That was adorable. They are 2-4 at their bye, and Baker Mayfield kinda sucks, and David Njoku broke something, and Nick Chubb still has a name that makes me giggle. Their coach is this random DUI mugshot: Still kinda laughing about Chubb. Anyway, the

A Modest Proposal for the Miami Dolphins

"Hey Wakey, did you catch the Dolphins game?" a friend on Facebook will ask me, presumably with a shit eating grin on their face because they saw on the sports ticker that Miami lost their second straight game by over 6 touchdowns. For the second straight week, I will have answered

Your “Holy shit, the Dolphins still exist?” 2019 Preview

/Scene opens with Wakezilla laying in bed, his two hands behind his head and his eyes wide open. Underneath the sheets is another body that begins just below Wakezilla's waist, with a head bobbing up and down. The bobbing stops and the sheets are raised to reveal Mrs. Wakezilla, wearing

Your Middle of the Night The Cure Live Disintegration Show from Sydney Live Blog

Kyle Broflovski was right: For those of you that don't know, The Cure has been in Australia playing their album "Disintegration" from beginning to end as part of the 30th anniversary of its release. Since they don't want to play the same show EVERY place they visit this year, they are live-streaming

Saturday Morning Footy – Open Thread

Good morning commentists wherever you are in the frozen northern hemisphere! This Premier League season has been a roller coaster of emotions for me as my beloved London Jaguras have been absolutely terrible this campaign. They've allowed 53 goals in 24 games. I am not a mathlete but that is not

Cleveland Browns At Bye (-7)

I trust Hippo is not the only one that will get that joke. So,  true story,  the call was made in the DFO back room for someone to write the Browns midseason/bye update.  Curious and thinking that whoever wrote the preview should write the update,  I asked who wrote it. Turns out

Instant Hippo Thoughts – Week 4, 2018 Season

Holy Bananacakes, Batman!  That was (mostly) fun, eh? I say mostly because I swept my early afternoon #HAILGAMBLOR, with dominating $50 ATS wins by the P*ts (boo) and the Bearistocrats! (yay-ish), along with a thrilling $60 ML win by the Pylons that be Striped.  But I also learned what it felt like to score

And Now, A Very Special Musical Number to Celebrate the Cleveland Browns

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBZ7AfZR9xs (It is tradition to rise.) Ooooh and sixteen! Ooooh and sixteen! Oh and sixteen! Oh and sixteen! Oh a-and sixteen! Ooooh and sixteen! Ooooh and sixteen! Oh and sixteen! Oh and sixteen! Oh a-and sixteen! Fooooor the city of losing teams, Cleveland. Oh and sixteen! Oh and sixteen! Oh and sixteen! Oh and sixteen! Fooooor the city of losing teams, Cleveland. Oh and sixteen! Oh and sixteen! Oh and

Consequences

INT. CLEVELAND BROWNS BOARD ROOM, WEEK 14 -- 6:25 A.M. Chief Strategy Officer Paul DePodesta knocks once and enters through the doorway. The room is occupied but eerily quiet for a Thursday morning. His coworkers, General Manager Sashi Brown and Coach Hue Jackson, quietly greet DePodesta as he grabs a chair between

Your “Just Go With The Flow” Wednesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News: The day was filled with Cardinals rumours. Bruce Arians wants out of the desert at the end of the season. Counterpoint: he says he's not leaving. Colin Kaepernick is being considered to replace Carson Palmer. I find it hard to believe they'd go that route with the combo

Hope Clicks Eternal – The Cleveland Browns

As a Vancouver Canucks fan, I realize seasons end long before the team actually stops playing actual games. (I rely on the Packers & Seahawks to give me my dose of crushing playoff failures.) But teams still have to put forward a brave face, lest they end up lessening their