Your “Is The Amazon Curse Real?” Thursday Night NFL Football Open Thread

Will one of these fine teams score more than 12 points in the win? Will there be enormous droughts of scoring? Will single dads plop their screaming kids in front of the tube in order that they are lulled to sleep? Will we give this game a chance? Yes.

Newsy Notes:

-Melvin Gordon and Nat Hackett sorta, kinda hashed it out after sitting down together. Did Coach bring up Gordo’s costly fumbles and his egregious 3.65 ypc average? Likely not.

-Tua says he lost consciousness after getting hit. Apparently well-wishers in his neighborhood brought by treats and artwork to lift his spirits. An NFL official also brought by a gag order that Tua refused to ‘autograph’.

-Hey, did you know there’s a Polynesian Football Hall of Fame? Some of this year’s finalists include Manti Te’o, Rey Mauluga and Tony Banks. Benefits include free tiki drinks for life!

-Travis Kelce re-jiggered his contract so that the Chiefs could free up some money against the cap. Names being bantered about include CMC, D.J. Moore and OBJ. “Something’s in the air”, Travis said during his podcast to which his brother Jason replied, “Yeah, your mom’s legs. Wait…”

To The Game!

Saints/Cards:

-The Red Rocket Rifle is ready to roar! Unless it’s Taysom or Jameis-nobody knows as of this writing.

-Kamara Time? Arizonny is ranked 24th in pass defense DVOA according to Football Outsiders and is dead last defending the pass to rb’s so maybe let him loose. (like you weren’t going to already)

-Rook wr Olave is back from his concussion holiday and should get plenty of work given that 4 Saints wideouts are injured. He hasn’t played the #1 role yet though.

-Will the Weber State speedster Rashid Shaheed vulture another score again? God, I hope so.

-D-Hop is around but was only allowed back in the building after week 4 and was not allowed to practice with the team. So he’s unlikely to have his game legs on but what do I know?

Nothing, I know nothing. If you know something, type it out.