NYE 2022 Sportsball Early Thread

Do we gots some Lesser Footy and JV NFL?  By gum we sure does!

Very Disappointing Everton desperately need United to open a can of whoopass on Wolves (7:30, USA), so it won’t happen.  But they are a fun watch (I will reluctantly admit), now that they’ve cast Ronaldo off the island.  ten Hag is a very, very good manager.

Four meh options in the 10:00 window, with NBC choosing to broadcast Ted Lasso against the Bonesaws (USA).  BLECH.  I will stream City of Men hosting/ass-blasting my Toffees (Peacock), but only because I well and truly hate myself.  Mighty Whitey gets Sham Town, and that might be the best watch for the neutral.

Spotlight Dance is a tasty treat indeed, with the resilient Trashbirds hosting the full-steam ahead King’s Afrikan Water Pistols (12:30, NBC).  Hippo is *THIS CLOSE* to predicting that the Gooners actually do win the League.  I don’t think there’s any question that their pole position (heh) is anything but fully deserved.  If they are a fraud?  They’ll stumble here, and badly so.

Since it is NYE, there is also ample JV NFL, starting with…

Alabama (-6.5) v. Kansas State – “Heckuva Job Brownie” Dome (12:00, ESPN)

It would seem that Roll Damn Tide wants to make a point, here.  Nobody opted out, even the #1 and #2 projected overall picks in the NFL Draft.  Odd for a non-playoff tilt, but Saban is mad about tOSU, and nobody wants to cross him when he’s mad.  But the Unded Bill Snyders are ALWAYS pesky, especially as underdogs.  Fascinating matchup.

Iowa (-2) v. Kenfucky – Bachelorette Party Bowl (12:00, ABC)

Nashville really is a pretty cool town, even if you dislike country music (as Hippo does, at least in its modern format).  But you DO get some opting out here, starting with Will Levis – smartly presering his inevitable “1st round bust” status, rather than suit up one last time behind the Mildcats’ paper mache OL.  Team Cornpone, on the other hand, has opted out of 21st century offensing, as a matter of team policy.

TCU (+7.5) v. Michigan – “Take a Siesta” Bowl, National Semifinal #1 (4:00, ESPN)

As is tradition, the first matchup promises to be a wet bag of shit.  Bloodeyes are a well-coached, spunky outfit – but their overall team talent is mid-30s, otherwise known as “similar to the Shitty Wolves.”  Lesser Harbs should dominate both lines of scrimmage, and win by three scores.  Meh, wake me up for the big one later.