I was inspired by Brick’s image that he posted on Sexy Friday and which is now the banner picture for this post. Instead of doing the New Year Resolutions post like I’ve done in previous years, I’ve decided to switch up the format and document my 2023 goal of getting my balls in more holes faster than ever.
I speak, of course, of my desire to lower my golf scores!
My golf story started a long time ago when my best friend introduced me to the sport in the 90s. His dad had taught him the game back home in Texas and he wanted to share it with me and our group of friends so we could all play and have fun together.
We started out at Par 3 courses so we could get used to the sport and not feel too intimidated. Eventually, we graduated onto executive courses and then, finally, the big boys.
Incidentally, I think the greatest proof that life is not fair is that I got a Hole In One early in my playing days with my buddy present. He was happy for me and all, but, as far as I know, he has never gotten one.
As happens in life, my buddy met a girl, went back to Texas, got married, and has a kid, so I don’t see him much anymore. We certainly don’t play golf.
As I’ve alluded to before, Los Angeles is a city of transplants and all my friends that I played golf with were all from somewhere else. Eventually, they all too went back home.
So, I stopped playing golf.
Recently, some YouTube golfing videos got added to my feed and they sparked a desire in me to get back into it. I’ve dived straight into the deep end and have joined a club in an effort to establish an official handicap and get better.
Predictably, my scores right now are…. Not good.
I still do not have an official handicap, but I expect it to be close to the max as my first goal is to break 100. I hope to eventually break 90 and be able to shoot regularly in the 80s. I seriously doubt I will ever break 80 but you never know.
Anyhoo, I hope to channel TWBS’ ghost and get good at the game. He was a really good player from the conversations we had. I always wanted to play a round with him but there was never enough time. Unfortunately, I never heard the story of how he picked up a cart girl. For that matter, I’ve never heard Rikki’s story about a similar event.
As I go through this journey, I’ll share with you stories from my rounds, good and bad. I’ll talk about the idiots you meet at the golf course and the good people you sometimes meet too. And if, somehow TWBS’ ghost enables me to convince a cart girl to join my lady friend and me for some putting at night, I’ll tell that story too.
Wish me luck.
Sorry to be so late to the party on this one. I’ll share my drink cart girl story on one of these posts. AKA the night I won the Super Bowl.
I can’t spin a yarn like TWBS did, but I have been a working golf teaching professional for over twenty years. If you ever need a friendly brain to pick, I just want everyone playing better.
I will take you up on that! My first approach is to work on course management. I think I’m making bad decisions that are costing me shots. I also need to work on my short game.
Always a good place to start. When you’re practicing work from short to long.
Utah punter is not a good actor.
Golf seems hella fun. Looking forward to reading about your personal journey.
/adds Steels and Fury, B to WCS and LaCrosse, Kernel in GolfInsurrectionists.xls
Another post is open, seems a bit iffy, tbh… Might want to update your malware thingys.
For King Hippo and Yeah Right:
https://youtu.be/A7JDNtOcbE8
Ted Tompkins has the faux smile of someone that is trying desperately to deny that he didn’t didn’t embezzle a large portion of your funds.
“Cameron Rising” (the Utah qb) sounds like the title of a radical re-boot of the “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” movie.*
*directed by Tarantino, because why not?
He has a devil beard now! Mister Mojo is an interesting cat.
brb ordering Tulane gear because that’s my team now
Happy New Year indeed!!
When I was in high school, my older sister’s boyfriend was the tennis pro at Latrobe Country Club, which was Arnie’s home course. The courts were clay, so they had to be watered frequently. We used to get really high, and run around on the course at night while the courts were getting watered. That was way more fun than actually golfing.
I was an assistant tennis pro, or as I preferred to be known, an “ass pro”
Come to think of it, Marc must have been too, because they were in college. Our rampaging around the golf course was in the summer. Did you have to fend off horny, drunk, middle aged housewives too? He had some stories!
I wouldn’t have tried to fend them off!
We had a few attractive middle-aged women, but if any were flirting with me, I didn’t notice. (Which is possible, I was fairly clueless in those days. Might still be, though I’m pretty sure that it’s just that I’ve lost whatever charms I ever had…)
He occasionally had to help in the club when they were having a big event, in the bar or passing hors d’oevres. He absolutely hated it. Got groped more than once, and propositioned on the reg. He said if they got really out of hand, he’d fire balls at them viciously during their next tennis lesson!
Tennis pro isn’t a code name for “male gigilo?”
I’ve always thought golf must be pretty fun since so many people enjoy it. I’ll give it a try at some point, I’m sure
I think you would actually be quite good at it. I think you have the temperament for it.
I have never met anyone who had the aptitude for BOTH tennis and golf (I am adequate solely at the former – reflexes are ok, just no fine motor coordination), but if anyone would be, it’d be Dok.
When I was taking tennis lessons some of the instructors actually discussed this. It seems there are differences in the angles you want for your joints, and golf players learning tennis tend to ‘scoop’ too much, especially in their forehand.
Totally agree. I wanted to be somewhat proficient at it off the bat but that didn’t happen. (three separate times) It’s too bad because it’s the perfect old man/retirement sport.
Would be nice if I had someone to help me with the balls.
https://youtu.be/xPlqLHcphyw
I hear ya on the golf game. At the two places I was stationed before here I was right next door to, and about a 1/4 of a mile from, nice 18 hole courses. Not as easy here, theres a course about 8 miles away but like you, my friends do not play or have moved away. There is however a 15th century villa (Villa Ghellini) under a mile from my house. It has a vast park and is usually wide open. I cross sling my clubs, grab a bag full of practice balls, hop on the bike and head over there drive balls, ala M*A*S*H from the ole helopad. I also pitch into a 15th century well that is covered over. Action golf Buddy.
That’s awesome!
There is a playground on the grounds. One time I was there with my daughter as she played. We heard violin music coming from that center sections second story open window. I kid you not, no amp or PA, just a young lady playing a violin that was perfectly crisp, clear and loud. The acoustics on those places are stunning. How did they do that 500 years ago?