I hate pretty much everything.  Which means every day is Hate Week, if you’s a Hippo.  Which is pretty fortunate, since hate 100% makes the world go ’round.  So every day should feel like Christmas, then!

But then again, I HATE Christmas too.

But nothing fuels Hippo’s personal bile furnace like Satan’s Eternal Dingleberry, Bill Kenwright.  By 77 years of age, most fuckers (especially fat ones, like Bill) would have the courtesy to retire.  Or at least be fookin’ DED.  But nooooo, this shmuck has to live forever, spilling his insular thinking and horrible ideas all over my poor Toffees.

This washed-up actor (or so I am told) struts and prances about like a prince.  I honestly think that, until THIS unpolishable turd of a season – he deluded himself into thinking he was popular.  Revered, even.  Such is the lot of one who spends his days surrounded by arse-kissers.

Word is, there must have been sommet in Fahrad Moshiri’s purchase contract that required keeping Bill on the Board.  Not that Moshiri could be expected to actually read the contract, he was really only on Merseyside to launder Alisher Usmanov’s dirty Rooskie money, build a new stadium, and sell up.

But it’s tits up instead for Everton, too late to even avoid the inevitable relegation – never mind the laughable notion of a forward-thinking, sustainable project.  No, that is left to the big money fantasies of teams like Brenford, or Brighton and Hove.  Jesus.  Tapdancing.  Fuck.

Anyway, I haven’t got the energy to go on and on in detail about this fuckstain.  Just know this is a near-universally held sentiment, and not just another of Hippo’s and/or Other Hippo’s hobby horses.  To the fixtures we go.

Fronk’s Hammers host semi-reeling Chelski to open your Lesser morning (7:30, USA).  I am starting to think Moyes ain’t gonna get the sack, after all.  Not until the summer, anyway (when he might just retire).  But they still sit only one place above the cut line.  Not great.  Todd Boehly has thrown around lots and lots of Dodger Blue money, just stupidly.  He’s going to go apeshit if they don’t at least qualify for Zooropa play.

Dunno why, but the Ded-Last-and-Seemingly-Loving-It Saints and boring, 15th position Wolves get broadcast coverage during the 10:00 window (USA).  Take your pick from THREE far superior options (Peacock only) in Mighty Whitey/Robins Hood, Palace/Trashbirds, or Pistoleros/Bees.

Spotlight Dance is another shite pick, yeah right’s Cherries hosting the Bonesaws (12:30, NBC).  Remember the phrase “Gag me with a Smurf?”  Let’s bring that back, y’all.

There’s a Sunday double-dip on USA, at least.  War of the Roses Redux (9:00), Leeds hosting this round.  Then watch City take out their many-faceted frustrations on the Visiting Villans (11:30).  Remember to close AND LOCK your door if you need to pull your cock out (Winslows and Haleys excepted).

That’s all I got.  May hate burn in your heart, today, tomorrow, and FOOKIN’ FOAREVER.