Sexy Friday – 20230616

TGIF! Happy indictment week everyone. Make a cursory check of your bathrooms for lost boxes and superfulous chandeliers.

Survival – Personal Edition

Feeling frisky? Ready to get out there and hit that dating scene again? While it will end in tears, here are a few tips to at least make sure it ends in tears with someone nice looking.

  • Use flattering photos. Make sure to include a few with a dog and/or cat. If you’ve got any young nieces/nephews, post those as well.
  • When talking about yourself, use euphemisms. For example, and this is totally hypothetical, instead of saying you’re unemployed you can describe yourself as looking for a new challenge.
  • This doesn’t apply to any of us, but if you’re not, at least seem to be rich. In your ramblings about your likes include references to luxury products, cars, destinations, etc. Or just reword a recent Dok vacation.
  • This also definitely doesn’t apply to anyone here, but seem interesting. Google what the hot trends are in hobbies, and list a few of those as your interests. Make sure to keep those browser tabs open so you can answer questions about those great interests of yours.
  • Again, no applicable here, but seem cultured. Research the latest highbrow books, arts, music, and movies. Get familiar with the titles and cliff notes of a few and list them as recent influences on your viewpoint.
  • Be positive. In the off chance you had a previous breakup, do not mention it. Do not allude to it. Your profile should read like you’ve never dated before.

Alright, that should be enough to get you going. Yes, the majority of your likes will be fatties, but look in the mirror sport. Also, remember you’re trying to date online for a reason, so keep those expectations in check. None of the ladies below are swiping on Bumble for a date.

Click here to get to commenting

Survival – Species Edition

Time to put the sexy in Friday!

Enjoy the weekend, folks! Alright, now let’s get to what’s most important: Commenting and drinking!

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Mr. Ayo
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yeah right

Ola!

Chillin with TAJ.

Don’t tell anyone but it’s his birthday.

Happy Friday!

WCS

Tell him congrats on another lap around Sol.

ballsofsteelandfury

Congratulations!

yeah right

He’s son number 3 and I’m number 4. He’s 16 months older and already retired.
Why the fuck am I still working?

Gumbygirl

Woooooooooo, Happy Birthday Taj!

SonOfSpam

Happy MF birthday Taj!

TheRevanchist

The best DJ I barely know. HB!

Brick Meathook

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Doktor Zymm

Also a Twitter account called Rugby in the Buff

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TheRevanchist

A much nicer version of my pics I’ll be taking when I get drunk.

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WCS

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WCS

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WCS

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WCS

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WCS

…and the coup de’ grace:

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Sharkbait

Caribbean beaches > Maine beaches. But the people watching up here is fantastic. So much white trash.

WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D0R6QO9LooI&ab_channel=MartianBoy87

It’s a different breed of trash, but trash all the same.

Doktor Zymm

Today I learned that there is an IG account called Rugby Butts

Last edited 1 year ago by Doktor Zymm
2Pack

And a related site, rugbybuttswithswampazz

Brocky

Forgive me if I’ve used this batch. I’ve lost all track of my system I had going

Spoiler

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WCS

Purple is your look, #12.

2Pack

All is forgiven.
/ as if they are picky about any Sexy Friday content

2Pack

Thank you Mr Ayo, a fine presentation this week as usual. I’d like a date with lady number 12 this week. She looks like she could use a nice seafood dinner.

2Pack

We’ll get Marika to do the grillin while we do the chillin.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Guesses? My money (hah!) is on Daniel Jones.

WCS

Todd Marinovich lost eight million grams of drugs since 2002.

Game Time Decision

Please let it be Jalen Ramsey

Gumbygirl

I’m hoping for Deshawn Watson. Would be poetic justice, and the Brownsiest thing evah!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

In my heart I just know it’s going to be one of My Raiders.

yeah right

It’s Zeke. Feels right.

Game Time Decision

Had a 2 hour nap tonight and still going to bed before midnight. Love being old

litre_cola

What is this midnight you speak of? Is that pee time?

Game Time Decision

That and 5 AM

Gumbygirl

.

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Brick Meathook

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ballsofsteelandfury

Love the hand placement by the gentleman on the right.

2Pack

He has learned well.

Gumbygirl

I bet her dad appreciates that too.

Gumbygirl

Barbarella is on TCM

SonOfSpam

Simon Le Bon is in that from what I understand.

SonOfSpam

Followed by Earth Girls Are Easy, which was kinda fun.

Gumbygirl

I watched it. Never saw it before, it was cute as a bug. And Jeff Goldblum back in the day- oh zaddy, I feel a little warm in my bits! Where did I put that chicken….

herodotus450

Use flattering photos. Make sure to include a few with a dog and/or cat. If you’ve got any young nieces/nephews, post those as well.

This would dovetail nicely with my court-mandated disclosure about Megan’s Law…

Gumbygirl

Fuck, I was going to grill hot dogs. I am out of gas!!! Gonna hafta air fry them instead, which works surprisingly well. Here’s a fabulous babe for Sexy Friday

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

“Great head.”

–Her ex boyfriend and hair stylist

Brick Meathook

You can boil hot dogs and then drink the water. Win-Win

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Sup

litre_cola

Gday, hungry? You look famished. Here, eat, eat.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’ve eaten a LOT today. Leftover garlic babka was amazeballs, lox and bagel for lunch, big Italian dinner, ice cream sandwich afterwards. So full. Time to pass out.

litre_cola

Don’ forget yer whisky! – local neighboUrhood Scot

Brocky

Evening all. I have a new goal in life

Step 1: buy this lingerie

Step 2: find a woman

Step 3: convince them to wear it

Step 4: ????

Spoiler

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Brocky

All clothing is clothing we want to take off. It’s practically our motto!

TheRevanchist

Then how come I get getting my selfies taken down?

2Pack

With the exception of the garter and stockings on occasion… I would agree with that.

litre_cola

Dems nice hips and aint need no dressin.

Brocky

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Gumbygirl

She matches that outfit you wore to the wedding!

Brocky

You’re not the first to notice my affinity for red and black

Those were my high school colors

Those were my college colors

2 of my favorite teams use them

My car is red…. my winter coat is red

If I get a souivinoyr t-shirt it’s almost always red

I always wanted to be red ranger and my favorite ninja turtle was Raphael

It’s a vicious cycle

Gumbygirl

They were our high school colors too.

Dunstan

So when DFO Vegas happens, you’ll be camped at the roulette table?

Brocky

Yes.

Wearing the jacket from the wedding

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Gumbygirl

It’s a lotta look, but you pull it off beautifully!

Brick Meathook

Since it’s Sexy Friday™ here’s a store in West L.A., Santa Monica BL & Sawtelle.

I drive through this intersection once a month, and this store wasn’t there last month. If you like big-titted gals (and who doesn’t, bless their hearts) this is probably the place to be.

I took this photo from my car, although it’s actually a light truck.

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ballsofsteelandfury

That’s a wonderful intersection. Very close to the Nuart

Brick Meathook

NuArt is just to the left.

Brick Meathook

That golf course is right next to UCLA but I swear it’s still hidden. I know almost nothing about it.

Also I hate golf.

Last edited 1 year ago by Brick Meathook
King Hippo

We get the world we all deserve…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6W2E6jNXzBE

Doktor Zymm

Question about the US-Mexico match yesterday. Why weren’t there a whole lot more red cards?

litre_cola

AGREED!!!!!!

TheRevanchist

The ref was not in control of the match at all. He let too much shit happen, which just incited both teams and the crowd.

litre_cola

Yous should have more suspended for Sunday. Just sayin. No worries though yes got Gregggggg coming back for 3 years.

IMO bad idea jeans.

Brick Meathook

INSIDE BRICK’S MAJOR APPLIANCES, PART II

Here’s my oven’s royal blue interior. I’ve had it eight months and I’ve never used it; it is simply too beautiful. Thankfully, I have a kick-ass toaster oven. Thank you for your time.

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Brick Meathook

I have the perfect vintage (1920s) cast iron skillet for that. That’s how I used to cook New York Strips on my old range; seared on the stovetop then finished in the oven to perfection. Alas, no more. Come on over and we can boil some steaks together.

Gumbygirl

Gumby has a Navy buddy, Al Rivera. He came over to our house in Scotland to make an “authentic” meal. Told me to stay out of the kitchen, he was doing everything. He fired up the grill and started a big pot of water on the stove, which I assumed was for beans or something. I was so wrong. He had a nice looking flank steak marinating, I figured he knew what he was doing. Until I went out to the kitchen to get a beer, just in time to see him put that lovely meat straight into the boiling water. Oh hell no. I fucking left for the pub. Gumby said it was one of the grossest things he ever ate, like chewing on a tire.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Makes me think of Chef in Apocalypse Now: “I looked in there and man, it was turning gray.”

BugEyedBoo

My brother wouldn’t shut up about the local butcher, and how awesome their strip steaks were. So he finally brings some over, and it was a crime, what he had done to those steaks.

Did you ever play ‘chemistry set’ as a kid, where you empty all the cleaners under the kitchen sink into a bucket to see what would happen? I think he had done that with what was in his fridge, to make a marinade. Dr. Pepper, Worcestershire sauce, mayonnaise, pancake syrup, who knows? Then he let them sit in that concoction overnight. He gets them out of the plastic bags they were sitting in and they were gray. Gray all the way through before it got anywhere near the grill. Those things were nasty.

Dunstan

I just read a comment on a cooking discussion where someone said that you shouldn’t season your steak with pepper because it will burn. Um, ok, haven’t encountered that but maybe? But then the dude goes on to say that he marinates all his steaks in soy and Worcestershire sauce.

Fuck, maybe if you gave me a really cheap, tough cut, I might resort to that, but I ain’t taking steak advice from that guy.

Doktor Zymm

Lovely! I also prefer a toaster oven

Gumbygirl

It’s so blue! And clean! My stove is the most basic model Kenmore ever made. Seriously, it only has one oven rack, WTAF? The only good thing I can say about it is that it’s gas.

Dunstan

I am envious. I cleaned my oven this week and the best I could do was get it to “sort of clean.”

Brick Meathook

The secret is to never use it

litre_cola

Cotes du Rhone here. Been a long week.

Today, Decilitre basically declared it pyjama day at school. When questioned, “Everyone else forgot.”

The whole school?

“Yeah, they don’t listen.”

litre_cola

He is 6, a knucklehead but at least I didn’t have to come pick him up due to him choking out a kid that stole his lego….allegedly.

King Hippo

BC Dick get that youngster his NRA membership yet?

litre_cola

No but BC Dick took his lessons and is licensed now.

BC Dick

I’ll teach the boy. No mercy for the clothed.

Doktor Zymm

Good on him for not succumbing to the tyranny of hard pants

Dunstan

Starting my weekend with a sazerac. Cheers, all!

King Hippo
ballsofsteelandfury

Excellent selections, good sir!

Doktor Zymm

Has Pete Carroll commented on the I-95 collapse? If jet fuel can’t melt steel beams I assume regular gasoline can’t either

King Hippo

it’s all Classic Illuminati but yew won’t see the GLOBALIST MEDIA mention that