I am officially a Senior. At least according to my golf club, which held its Senior Championship that was open to those 50 and older. On the bright side, I did get carded a week ago buying alcohol so maybe I don’t look like a Senior?

Grasping at straws here, I know, but go with me.

The tee time was after 9, so I actually had a chance to sleep in a bit and get to the course early to prepare properly. I got a small bucket of balls and managed to hit most of my clubs decently. I also got in some putting practice and felt fairly decent about that as well.

It was a little unusual because there were actually two tournaments going on at the same time. It was the regular monthly tournament and the Seniors Championship. You could sign up for both but you only played one round. Your score would count for both tournaments. You had to pay extra if you wanted to participate in both but I said fuck it and signed up for both.

So, do y’all remember when SoCal got hit by a Tropical Storm? Well, there was a hurricane off Baja that was far enough not to threaten us but close enough to provide moisture. This came in the shape of humidity. It was hot and humid.

Luckily, I was prepared, or so I thought. I had brought a Modelo Chelada and a Malibu Rum Piña Colada. I cracked open the Modelo right after teeing off. I have mentioned before that I play better while drinking, right?

The first shot went like a dream and hit the fairway. The second shot went like a nightmare and ended up in the woods. I tried to recover the best I could and managed to finish with a 7. Not great but at least it wasn’t an Abominable Snowman.

The second hole followed a similar pattern. Very good tee shot followed by a horrible second shot that had me scrambling to salvage another 7. On the Par 3 Third, I salvaged a 6 after somehow finding my ball near the Maintenance Area on top of a pile of debris. It was a perfect lie, too.

To say I got lucky in this round of golf is an understatement. I think there were at least three more instances where I by all rights should have lost a ball yet I magically found it and was able to salvage a decent score on the hole.

The Fourth was another 7 and I was thinking I should have premixed some 7&7s into a water bottle instead of bringing cans of booze.

I did a little better on the Par 3 Fifth getting my lowest score of the round so far, a 5. Another 7 followed by a 6 and things were not going well.

Then something magical happened.

I hit the ball short and right of the green on the Par 3 Eighth, chipped to within a few feet, and drained the putt for a legit par. Then, on the Par 5 Ninth, I managed to somehow get the ball on the green in two within 10 feet and drained the putt for an EAGLE!

I had never gotten an eagle in my life.

This chain of events allowed me to climb out of the hole I was in and finish the Front Nine with a 51. An unbelievable 51 that I myself couldn’t understand. I had to have the other guys count it twice to make sure I wasn’t imagining it.

As you all know, I do better on the Back, so I felt encouraged and reinvigorated. The weather, however, wasn’t cooperating. I had finished my Modelo by the 6th hole and was well into the Piña Colada as we made the turn.

I really should have stopped to get a cold drink but I didn’t.

Suddenly, I caught fire. I strung together a bunch of bogeys. As the Back Nine unfolded, I was heating up. Unfortunately, that was both figuratively and literally.

The heat and humidity were bad. Real bad. The energy level for the whole group went way down. We sought shade wherever we could find it. My piña colada ran out quickly and none of the drinking fountains worked. Everyone else struggled though I managed to keep my worst score at double bogey.

After an incredibly draining and tiring Back Nine, I was in the clubhouse with an even 100 for the day. Given my handicap, that put me at one over.

That would prove to be good enough to get me in the winnings. I finished in second place for my flight for both tournaments and got a skin and some money for my Eagle.

I finished the day with 70 points towards the Club Cup and with $95 in winnings. Yes, I actually made a profit.

PROS

I persevered through really tough conditions and a really bad start. I am actually really proud of myself for that. I never gave in or threw in the towel thinking the round was lost. I kept trying and it paid off.

I got an EAGLE!!

I was more consistent in the Back Nine and eliminated mistakes I had made in the Front. I also focused on one hole at a time, which helped to improve my performance.

No Abominable Snowmen!

CONS

It was ridiculously hot and humid. I drank a shitload of water as soon as I got off the course. I should have brought more with me. I’m lucky I didn’t have health issues because of the heat.

I need to be able to play better from the start and not put myself in a hole I have to climb out of.

OVERALL RATING:

I saw where I lost some strokes on bad hits, so my score potentially could have been a lot better. On the other hand, I really did get very lucky with finding balls I thought were lost. My overall score is probably a fair reflection on where I’m at.

I need to get better, though. I need to lower my handicap and start shooting in the 90s regularly. My goal is to eventually be shooting in the 80s.

I think I see the path and that involves playing a lot more and practicing a lot more. Easier said than done, though. I’m still working so I’m not a “real” Senior. It’s tough to find the time to do that. I shall do my best, though.

Since Rikki has finished his cart girl story, does anyone else want to share any stories of when you took your shot, despite the odds, and it worked out? It doesn’t have to involve anal although that would be cool if it did.

See you next time.