TGIF! Glad to see everyone make it through the week without a season ending injury, indictment, or impeachment inquiry! Well, I assume so anyway.
Survival – Personal Edition
Let’s do some parenting advice. Let’s say you’re the type of irresponsible parent that doesn’t have any baby bottles on hand, but you do have a hungry baby in your hands. Well, no need for the baby to suffer due to your unfitness. Let’s go through some baby bottle substitutes to deliver that milk, or formula, or whatever other substitute you use.
- Medicine dropper or turkey baster. Place a few drops of the milk in the side of the baby’s mouth. Allow the baby to finish swallowing before adding more.
- Straw. Suck the milk in from one end, seal with your thumb, then feed the baby from the other end by removing your thumb. Again, use the side of the baby’s mouth, and don’t release the milk all at once.
- Gravy boat or small creamer from a tea set. Fill with milk, then feed the baby using the spout. Again, feed the baby slowly and allow them time to swallow.
- Water gun. Fill the barrel, then aim for the side of the baby’s mouth, and use gentle pressure on the trigger.
- Sports water bottle. Squeeze into the baby’s mouth gently.
- Cake decorating bag. Fill the bag about three-fourths full with your thumb over the decorating tip. (Oval, round, or leaf decorating tips advised) Then twist the top closed to contain the milk. Insert the decorating tip into the baby’s mouth and use your thumb to control the dispensing of the milk.
- Hamster bottle. Sterilize first! Then fill the bottle with milk. This is convenient since the leakproof vacuum with keep the milk in the bottle. Then let the baby feed itself from the tube. Do not secure the bottle for self feeding. The baby can very much hurt itself if you try that.
Once the baby is fed, burp them, and let them take a nap. In the meantime, obtain some actual baby bottles or clean the ones you do have.
Click here to get to commenting
Survival – Species Edition
Time to put the sexy in Friday!
\
Enjoy the weekend, folks! Alright, now let’s get to the comments!
Bob Dylan may have been a performer, but he was really more a song writer, and many bands performed his songs better than he did. Jimi Hendrix is probably the king of the Dylan cover artists. Here’s a band called Spirit who performing a live cover of Dylan’s “Like a Rolling Stone;” the studio version is awesome.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fMm2JCkzYCM
YouTube is ruined now that they block ad blockers. Any options?
A delicate feather.
Great stuff. The boundaries have been pushed and established it seems. The second one is my favourite.
The boundaries will continue to be pushed.
#13 was the correct choice, but you do you. And her.
With the overalls? Yeah that’s good. I had a hard time counting that high.
The one before that. I can’t count that high either.
Oh yes. Yes yes. I see what you mean.
Nailed It!
To be fair to the sailors, that unmanned aircraft fell off the flight deck while they were parking it, on what is clearly a training ship. It didn’t crash; nobody got hurt.
So, I just started watching The Flash movie. First 2 minutes and it already sucks.
Simply magnificent work here Mr. Ayo. I concur with King Hippos selections.
For the groups consideration some classic sexy.
UPDATE: The GWS women’s match has been delayed 30 minutes due to a snake on the field.
I’m going to sleep and will see how early I can wake up for the men’s playoff game before going to temple.
Fucking Australia. They should pass out tshirts and all departing international flights that say “I survived a trip to Australia
Turns out the snake was attached to the guy Lauren Boebert was beating off during Beetlejuice thanks tip your waitress
Jesus Christ, there is no bottom with these goblins. Lowest of the low. Hoest of the Hoes.
That’s democracy. There is no accounting for taste. Vote for the scum who’s convinced you they’re the best scum.
Also – thoughts you had that Alouettes pick. So close. I think you were the only one and it was a smart pick. Considering the Montreal flu so many teams catch.
Yeah, I thought I’d take a flyer on that one. Toronto has been winning so easily I hoped they would get caught napping. Oh well, I did pick Edmonton!
Montreal is a dangerous team at home. Best bars in Canada. Good call in Edmonton too, they are a real team now
In a Montreal bar, even the Froggiest working-class shit hole bar, all you have to do is order a beer in their weird bastard French dialect, show some American money, and then tell them you’re American and not English Canadian. Those Acadian peasants will love the hell out of you in their uniquely disgusting way. Also, the Habs lead for two periods then blow it in the third. Tabarnaque!
It seems they’ve caught it because they’re playing!
And now I will surely have a snake-based nightmare.
Oh yeah, Happy Roshshananah. I can’t spell it, but Shalom!
As a man, I can’t suckle an infant and nourish it at my teat, but I can print out this page and keep it in my wallet and goddammit I’ll try my best.
note to self: do not let Brick babysit
SPAM: Brick, here’s my newborn infant child. Can you babysit for a while while I take my wife to her mani-pedi appointment ?
BRICK: What?
SPAM: Just look after the delicate child. We’ll be back in a few hours.
BRICK: What?
SPAM: It’s a cinch. See you at eleven. Bye (exits)
Brick swaddles the infant safely and snugly in his/her (TBD) bassinet.
BRICK: So . . . . do you like engines?
I like being in the middle of the plane on the window so I can enjoy the view and fall asleep to the hum of the engines.
Ride first class in the front of the plane and have the stewardess describe the engines to you. Worth every penny.
Goodnight Moon but describing engine parts!
Is that a fucked up Pratt & Whitney engine?
Connecticut’s finest, like Horatio.
(I think Sharkbait is from MA, but I might be wrong)
Technically both! Grew up in Connecticut, now reside in MA
Impressive plumbing.
He’d take the baby to the American Legion. Cheap beer and shots, maybe a burger or a hot dog,and then everybody will have a nice nap.
https://i.makeagif.com/media/8-28-2015/BPG02k.mp4
https://youtu.be/dFShj1StCEc?si=uZN48L0Vp-cYzQDa
Well THAT isn’t what I wanted to post.
Just want to throw in that if you get a chance to get breast milk from the source you should absolutely do it. It may ruin you and forever bond you to a woman who tortures your mind but goddamn it’s good. That was the point of this, yes?
No, the point was feeding a baby with a straw or water pistol because there was no other option. If there’s a chick around, hand the baby to her and then head on down to the bar for some beers and laughs.
This is true
How ya doin?! Watching Mónica Puig vs Venus Williams. Venus is so big, my drink could not obscure her
Is Lauren Boebert jacking you off?
#s 6 and 7 this week, Mein GOTT!!!
#6 was a late substitute to avoid a tense call from the Puerto Rico area for the 3rd straight week.
What say you?
h
ttps://i.postimg.cc/zvyKKc0Q/7cdf07456270c852d2e758b2b45fdda22124d314.jpg
I like it but, yeah, you would have probably had someone contact you.
Last two minutes of Melbourne-Carlton:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oTwITJc5vxY
I’m trying to exit from this dinner so I can watch my giants, but if I’m not commenting in 45 minutes, no spoilers please!
You must be taking about the ladies.
The Semi Final starts at 2:40 AM Pacific.
Yup I’m an idiot.
Well, that was something
Turns out Virginia was rather.. Cavalier, with their lead.
Lately everything sounds like a banner, but you get my vote!
Sexy Friday Appropriate?
“I’M IN YOUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW”
Yeah, you can keep that thing away from my boobs, thank you!
I LOVE outdoor showers!
That’s now how you wear your mask #3
Picture 3 is also a good example.
If it wasn’t for this fucking storm I’d take one this weekend.
I don’t know if anyone mentioned it but Tree did it, he said the thing!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=APc8onwaSyc
One of us! ONE OF US!!!!