Your Lions/Niners Open Thread

Let’s get at it again!

Lions/Niners:

-Injury Report: Detroit’s Hendon Hooker is listed as questionable (tooth). I did not make that up.

-Keenan 175/2, Nacua 181/1, Doubs 95, Thielen 107/1, Moore 96/1, Watson 94/1, Olave 119, Jefferson 141/1, Lamb 227/2 and Jefferson again 192/1. If you’re a #1 wr you just love playing against the Lions pass D. Will one of (or both?) Aiyuk and hobbled Deebo have a game? The Magic 8 Ball says, “Are you kidding me?”

-As you suspected, Detroit has the very worst pass defense left in the playoffs. How did they get this far then? Well, they have a habit of matching or exceeding their opponents splash plays. As a team they finished with the 2nd-most explosive plays (gains of 20+ yards) with (ugh!) 69.

-Speaking of explosive, Gibbs should have himself a game, not so much Montgomery. The reasoning behind this is that the Niners surrender 5.4 ypc on runs outside the tackles. Since week 15 they are 25th in total yards allowed and 28th in yards per carry allowed.

-San Fran is in it’s 19th Conference Championship game-that’s the most of any team.

-Stepping Up: DE Aidan Hutchinson has more than doubled his pass rush win rate in the playoffs.

-The perception is that being a 7th rounder Purdy is a dink and dunker that doesn’t take chances but guess who led all his peers in air yards per attempt?

-So I came across a site (Sumer Sports) that attempts to quantify how good a coach is at in-game decision-making. They call it Win Probability Added Over Expected which is a mouthful. Of the remaining Leaders Of Men left in the playoffs, Campbell is the best and it’s not even close. (I’ll link in the comments) Not bad for a knee-biting son of a bitch. Btw, on this list Shanny Jr. is a bottom.

It’s yours to do with as you wish.

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

That was hilarious the way Kittle (and pal) waved to the camera.

Sharkbait

Welp. Go 49ers

LemonJello

Welp. This is less than ideal.

Beerguyrob

Almost the ghost of the 2014 Seahawks there.

Doktor Zymm

I want the LioUns to somehow get a field goal here so we can see MOAR GAME

NotShogunButShogun

Who calls time out on a kickoff ffs?!

Downfield Matriculator

Well, now they’ve covered the spread

Doktor Zymm

In other news, the US Department of Agriculture sent me a survey about the farm* I own.

*I have never owned a farm

NotShogunButShogun

Is that how you claim the volcano for tax purposes?

LemonJello

You don’t claim the cloning vats in one of you secret lairs as “a farm” ?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Why didn’t you caucus in Iowa?

jjfozz

My response: “I grow fucks, but they’re gone, because I’m all out of fucks to give.” FUck.

hippofant

Go for 2 Dan, you know you want to.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I like how not a single soul on either bench thought Williams was gonna come down with that.

Redshirt

If they’d kick those two field goals, the Lions would, at worst, be lining up for a walk off field goal right now.

Doktor Zymm

Eh, no way to say that for sure, but yeah probably

Horatio Cornblower

The first one I can see going for it. The second one they had to go for the tie given the time left and the stakes.

Beerguyrob

How about it Greg? Can we absolutely judge that draw play?

Brocky

Say what you want about bradys annoying ass monotone smug way of talking, he can’t possibly be as bad

BrettFavresColonoscopy

He absolutely can

Sharkbait

Why would you run there??

Horatio Cornblower

Campbell has just lost it.

Brocky

Drinking his own koolaide

BrettFavresColonoscopy

OH YEEEEEEAAAAH

BrettFavresColonoscopy

This is a great four minute drill, too bad it needed to be closer to two minutes.

Doktor Zymm

The good news is that this dude was eaten by a bunch of lions related to the dead lion in this photo soon afterward. The bad news is the lion was killed before it could get to the Super Bowl.
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BrettFavresColonoscopy

That guy is a solid 6’3″, 215 pounds

Horatio Cornblower

Was he really? That is fantastic.

I hope the lions took way too much time finishing him off.

Just like the Detroit Lions are taking way too much time to finish this drive off.

Horatio Cornblower

Kick the FG now and worry about the TD if you can get the insides kick or stop the 49ers.

Petronel

Foot long pretzel with cheese…

You have my attention, Subway.

(would be extra nice if beer cheese)

Redshirt

The Detroit Lions gritty-ed themselves out of a Super Bowl.

Senor Weaselo

THIS SECOND HALF I CALL THE REFRACTORY PERIOD BECAUSE THE LIONS FUCKED TOO HARD AND CLIMAXED TOO SOON.

NotShogunButShogun

Oh my youth

Doktor Zymm

The NFL sent the Niners some Peters ammo during halftime to make sure we had the MOST BORING POSSIBLE matchup for the Owl. Meh.
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Horatio Cornblower

Oh Goff, thou hast Goff’d.

Downfield Matriculator

Campbell take either of those field goals and the game is not over, but he did not and it is

Petronel

Gee I wonder what graphic that could possibly be.

(See upthread)

jjfozz

THESE LIONS I CALL THEM THAT LEADER SINGER FROM INXS, BECAUSE THEY ENJOY CHOKING THEMSEVLES

Col. Duke LaCross

David Carradine’s ghost sheds a tear.

NotShogunButShogun

Grasshoppers catch better than lions. Sticky legs

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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Sharkbait

What a flip since the 4th and 2 drop

Beerguyrob

I don’t know what they put in the Niners orange slices at halftime, but Lawrence Taylor would like three bags of them.

NotShogunButShogun

That’s the one part I can get with on a larger scale.
But entertainment wise…I really wanted the unheard of bowl

hippofant

oh no x4

King Hippo

Just could not get a stop. OY

jjfozz

Fuck everything. Just fuck the world.

ballsofsteelandfury

Game Blouses

Horatio Cornblower

Brutal hold on one of the Lions on that Purdy run, although I don’t think any of the officials were able to see it.

Petronel

WOOP WOOP PURDY PEOPLE

NotShogunButShogun

Welp…this is done. Narrative secured.

hippofant

Oh no x3

fleshwound_NPG

ben johnson in full washington commanders form already this 2nd half

King Hippo

It’s gonna come down to one last drive for DET. Either at 27 or 30-24

King Hippo

30 it is. Not great for Litre’s wager

litre_cola

Nope. Dire.

ballsofsteelandfury

Is the Detroit FG kicker really bad? I don’t understand this.

Horatio Cornblower

Dan Campbell’s aggression getting the better of him.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

That put the Goff in fucking awful

NotShogunButShogun

I sgoff at it

Beerguyrob

The transformation of Dan Campbell into Kyle Shanahan has begun.

Last edited 9 months ago by Beerguyrob
fleshwound_NPG

except mike shanahan has an iq of >0

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Fact Check: inconclusive

Beerguyrob

My edit ruined your point. Sorry.

Horatio Cornblower

That was a terrible go-for-it call.

Game Time Decision

Terrible throw

Doktor Zymm

Only cause they didn’t make it

Horatio Cornblower

Unless their kicker is nicknamed ‘Stumpy’ they needed to tie the game there.

Last edited 9 months ago by Horatio Cornblower
King Hippo

WHAT DO YOU DO??

Horatio Cornblower

They had to take points there. Had to.

King Hippo

I think a big part of the calculus is that is a hard place to kick (from 40+)

Horatio Cornblower

If your kicker can’t hit from 45 in the NFC championship when you’re down 3 with about 5 minutes to play then why is he even on the roaster?

Horatio Cornblower

“roaster”?

Go home, autocorrect. You’re drunk.

Doktor Zymm

I’m as disappointed in the result of that very fun play as Jerry Jones was in the success of the Civil Rights Movement back when the Lions last won a road playoff game
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Horatio Cornblower

YEEEEEE-HAWWWWWWW I AM FUCKING RACI I MEAN A PRODUCT OF MY TIMES!!!!

Horatio Cornblower

/49er defender runs into Lions WR, knocking him off balance just before ball gets there and glances off WR’s hands

Greg Olson: “That’s a great no-call!!”

Game Time Decision

The narrative cannot be denied. Resistance is futile

fleshwound_NPG

every other lions offensive play now is an adventure

BrettFavresColonoscopy

THESE DETROIT LIONS I CALL THEM A MORMON HOUSEWIFE BECAUSE THEY WERE A LITTLE AWKWARD FLICKING THAT FLEA AND PROBABLY FEEL BAD NOW

King Hippo

I am trying to control my laughter so my daughter doesn’t ask what’s so funny

Horatio Cornblower

“Daddy’s invisible friends made a funny!”

“OK, Dad, that’s great.”
/starts frantically searching “rest homes near me”

ballsofsteelandfury

She needs to know

Sharkbait

In fairness to Goff, he’s hitting these guys in the hands.

Horatio Cornblower

Not for nothing, but Jared Goff throws an awful ball. Wounded ducks fly more direct routes.

NotShogunButShogun

I’ve seen more than a few. Truth!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Is there a stickum shortage in Santa Clara?

King Hippo

Momentum is the next day’s starting pitcher