You get the contenders 1-2-3 (in increasing order of likelihood to succeed, in Hippo’s view), all on USA/NBC.
The filthy Redshite play Praise Beesus early (7:30, USA), with the unsettled Ivan Toney hopefully doing humanity in the good. He’s in the shop window for the summer, no doubt. Surely he’d prefer the biggest/richest sides to come a-courting. So SCORE, damn you.
Gooners/White Lives Matter is the USA pick of the 10:00 window, hopefully the ClubhoUse FavoUrite won’t be drunk on last week’s hiding away to the hapless Hammers. Burnley is dangerous if/when one doesn’t take them seriously. Plus, they are fighting for survival (given the points deduction likely coming to both Everton and the Robins Hood – they have an outside chance to make it).
Fulham/Villa and Cherries/Bonesaws likely the pick of the streaming options, but I am also curious to see what kind of response Moyes gets out of West Ham (away to Robins Hood). If he does NOT get one, then I fear he has lost the dressing room. He’s hard to fire, being in the top half and reigning kinda-sorta-champions of Europe. But shit happens. And I certainly wouldn’t expect him back next season.
City of Men get the recently-MOAR-crumulent-ish Chelski in the Spotlight Dance (12:30, NBC). I’m still expecting blood here. Arse blood.
Knifey/Trashbirds (9:00, USA) and Lutes/Men Untied (11:30, USA) are your Sunday Funday, followed by whoever-follows-Uncle Woy at Palace taking on Everton on MNF (3:00, USA). None of these are appealing options, but fuck it. Gotta watch something.
Just for research purposes I had to prove that last week’s taco experience wasn’t a fluke, we ordered them again today.
It was not a fluke. This taco place is the big swinging balls.
God DAMN that’s a good taco.
More like Left-the-Earth Driesell, amirite?
/it’s okay to make jokes right away when a guy lives all the way to 92
https://www.espn.com/mens-college-basketball/story/_/id/39544700/hall-fame-hoops-coach-charles-lefty-driesell-dies-92
I have the feeling the Carl Weathers was given a heads-up that these Trump sneakers were about to be released and chose to die rather than endure all the Apollo Creed jokes that would have been made at his expense.
Those look like something you could buy at the Mesa swap meet.
The Santa Fe Springs swap meet has the Mexican version.
Look, basically legalizing mass shooting while not letting the coloreds vote is one thing, but by God Tennessee you have now gone a step too far!!!
https://twitter.com/WSMV/status/1757561096238506413
It’ll be yet another way they are inferior to Kentucky
If it wasn’t for their barbecue there would be no reason to ever visit there.
Their barbecue is worth the trip.
Remember – these are the people who “want” to get guv’ment off your back!
At this point the only thing standing between UConn and a repeat championship is themselves and/or some dipshit mid-major having a Cinderella run where they shoot 80% for three weeks.
/shudders in George Mason
I don’t expect any team in the modern era to ever again have as smooth of a ride as they did last season. Just zero drama for the entire tournament.
I think the Iona game was the only one they trailed in for any significant period of time.
They are completely dismantling the #4 team in the country right now. Andrew Hurley is going to get playing time today. This year’s team might be even better. And Dan Hurley is a) insane and b) the best coach in men’s basketball today.
Yes, there was a span of about two minutes late in the first half where they were down by as much as four points.
It’s a beautiful day! I’m going to spend a few more hours reading in bed before I go out for a walk though. Or maybe play some Civ
Those who bow before GAMBLOR – how bad is FanDuel? I know for sure they are going to be NC-approved in March (every other ad I see proclaims this), and at least they employ Kay Adams instead of that Kevin Hart fuckweasel?
They’re owned by the same company that owns Pokerstars and PaddyPower
SUN: [is behind clouds all morning]
LAUNDRY THAT RIKKI HUNG UP: [waits patiently]
SUN: [comes out]
– five seconds later –
DR. MRS. DEADLY, ESQ.: [takes down laundry]
I am reasonably certain she wants you ded.
Well, you don’t want it to fade.
Yeah, definitely can’t have these couch blankets and kitchen rags lose their vibrancy.
She’s just prepping to vacuum all it.
Fighting Horatios kicking some Marquette ass.
Early March Madness research in progress.
Proof how much elite coaching matters. They deffo have the Best Hurley.
At the rate I’m drinking today, I’m due for a pretty good Hurley later.
If anyone needs me, I’m reclining in a chair at crate and barrel waiting for death and/or my wife.
Death will probably be cheaper.
BLECH, glad I napped.
Timely goal is timely.
Raheem Sterling revenge game, I guess.
Don’t even think of touching The Broom or you’re getting the “Coldplay Treatment”*.
*you were all yellow
[glances up from the Hugh Ambrose book he’s reading] – Bill Parcells
Less than an hour until the green flag drops on the 12 hours of Bathurst. Best Aussie race of the year.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p_CTjle7xC0
Oh, you fucker.
Now, I’m not going to able to watch anything else.
Sorry, Lil’ and Lil’er WCS. Dad’s watching the racing again, and is inaccessible.
Man City now, the Senators at 3pm and Sillycuse at 5:30-the universe is coming up Scotchy today!
Poke The Broom with a stick, I need y’all to do sommet (like take the lead)
He’s been insane in the short time back from injury. Hopefully he conjures up some more magic.
That pass he put on Haaland’s head was just stupid good. Can’t believe that big Viking missed.
He had three great chances to score and flubbed them all. Ah well…
I mean, if you guys are souring on him I’m sure Arsenal would be willing to take him off your hands.
Not just yet but if he doesn’t score 5 in the next two games… Is that what it’s like being an asshole, front-running fan? Didn’t feel good at all.
https://www.nbcnews.com/think/opinion/rush-limbaugh-died-lung-cancer-after-denying-smoking-s-risk-ncna1258395
Let’s all put aside our differences and congratulate the big man himself, Rush Limbaugh, on achieving three years of sobriety today. It’s truly a momentous achievement Mr. Limbaugh, and I hope you take some time off from being buried upside down in a pool of fiery diarrhea in Hell to enjoy it.
Let’s put aside all our differences
Screw that! I hate Limbaugh more than you!
I hate Rush Limbaugh even more now for making us fight!
Very good.
I have no problem with Limbaughs death kicking off a generation of celebrating these fucks dying off.
Sometimes I like to edit one of my comments here just to make Gumbygirl jealous.
Edit: no edits necessary
Secondary Edit, made without permission: BFC is a big meany.
Tertiary Edit: It’s spelled “meanie.”
Ed. note: Both spellings are acceptable
Great thread on NFL teams 2023 seasons as Simpson’s clips.
https://twitter.com/TheSimpsonsNFL/status/1758631877806579883
https://twitter.com/TheSimpsonsNFL/status/1758635656232968448
That whole thread is spot on.
They nailed it. I especially liked the Steeler one, because it’s pretty much everything our own Yinzer contingent despises about their brethren.
“Suck” kinda rhymes with “Cutlet”, ppl ferget that.
I think the Steeler fans on the intertubes are spot on! We need to fire that Rooney Rule hire, Mike Tomlin, and get a good coach. Big Ben is available. At the very least they could have hired him for OC.
/channeling inner Steelers Depot fan.
Ten more minutes of this!?
Even as an Arsenal fan I think that’s cruel and unusual punishment for Burnley.
I just farted so perfectly that if I had done it in a Japanese restaurant in Tokyo, everyone would have stood, bowed, and applauded.
Starting to think about getting a new car, so as not to wait until my current one just dies, and am realizing how annoying “buying guides” are to people who aren’t car people.
Like, I still don’t understand what fucking “torque” is, though I gather it’s good?
I’m just going to put this shit off for another couple of months.
Here’s how to think about it:
Horsepower: Determines how fast you hit the wall
Torque: Determines how far you push the wall
Buy a Subaru.
Done.
Or Toyota. Depending on what you do.
I drive around town, make occasional trips to the dump, grocery store and gym.
Quite honestly a Yugo would probably be sufficient for me.
Hyundai. 10 years / 100k miles warranty is unbeatable. Bought one last week after much research AND introspection.
The ’24 Elantra: exact sentiment, fucking terrible song
https://youtu.be/oaEM4JYFPfw?si=thWqA_udu-LJTt3r
I’d not object to seeing if a Hyundai is right for you.
But Mitsubishi made the Zero. Never buy Mitsubishi
Honda man here. Had 3 my entire life. They are indestructible by common weapons.
C’mon Cherries, close out the barcodes!
Seconded
Welp
FUCK. Always giving up the late stoppage time bullshit equalizer.
Fuck.
These Arsenal kits are still awful, but if they’re going to score 5 or 6 goals a game while wearing them I am willing to learn to tolerate them.
Little pudgy Burnley kid behind the Arsenal bench making a face like he just realized Burnley isn’t going to win this game.
Don’t worry kid: lesser footy glory is temporary, cake is eternal.
That’s why Arsenal paid millions for Kai Havertz! Garbage time goals against overwhelmed teams!
Maybe y’all will kick the extra point this week?
They seem to be going for it, anyway.
On a US Navy submarine there are two crew members who are required to be currently certified in doing medical sutures.
The first of course was our Hospital Corpsman (we didn’t carry a doctor)
The other was the Executive Officer (XO) who was second in command. He also had to be currently certified.
Why?
In case he had to sew up the Corpsman.
Mrs. Horatio and I stopped at a fancy-schmancy chocolate shop on Valentine’s Day and got two boxes of their chocolate.
The pieces are not labeled so we nibble on the pieces trying to avoid coconut like we’re Ukranian soldiers trying to tip-toe through a minefield.
Whoever decided to add coconut to good chocolate needs to be flayed.
Samesies. Just caramel or fruit, please. Oh man, a fancy orange or raspberry cordial is worth the resulting migraine (I don’t process chocolate well, because FML).
Got a lemon one last night that was almost enough to make me believe in a just and fair God.
Almost.
Coconut in chocolate is delicious, but I’m upvoting that you had to stand in line to lead to this.
I love coconut in anything.
Nothing but savages in outer Connecticut, that’s for sure.
“Not sure what Burnley were expecting, sending a squad led by a denizen of the Belgian Congo up against His Majesty’s gunners.”
-Lord Cecil Rhodes, probably, sitting on his veranda wondering why the damned teletype machine isn’t letting him on DFO this fine morning, and which servant he should have shot to make sure it doesn’t happen again.
Some may recall I refinished the diving board with blaxito last year. Very 4-year old and his dad on a Wednesday night production complete with some drip marks that I hate but also that’s why I did it with him right? Plus that pool equipmeny blue color hides a lot.
Anyways, we have to redo the pool now. Here’s the before with the diving board as the star.
Why are space aliens abducting your dog?
Fucking palm trees. Or 90′ cactii. I dunno.
He’s too fat for the laser.
You better make more iced tea.
Top 5 show I have been to. I feel like death this morning. Getting old sucks.
at least the deficit is halved. Did they play “Little Lover’s So Polite?” I fucking bet that would be awesome live.
They did. Was all fucking superb.
Got up at 10 today, (late poker tournament where my AK managed to lose to AJ; no one cares about my stupid card stories), turned on Arsenal and they were already up 1 and looking at a PK.
Then had French toast and bacon for breakfast, left over from the breakfast-for-dinner last night.
Like RTD, everything’s coming up in my favor this morning!
[wakes up]
[doesn’t have too bad of hangover]
[turns on TV]
[Arsenal immediately scores]
[has good feeling about today]
Fronk, I should send you a City of Men Bernard Gilkey managerial pic for your wall of leadership.
Speaking of vaccines, the one year I skipped flu shot, I got so sick that I hallucinated. We had a dynamo/holy terror toddler at that point, thank fuck then-wife and I didn’t have our “hallucination” stages concurrently.
NEVAR AGAIN. I make Wolven Sort HippoSpawn go with me and get her shots, just like I make her vote.
Speaking of that, I need to look up who the “normie” candidates are in the downballot races (early voting in Demmycratic primary next week).
My ballot has already been received and counted. Voting by mail is the shit.
We’ve got a federal election in March, so gonna vote at the early polls next weekend
“Don’t forget to vote often, too!”
-Bridgeport, CT
Same and same. Voting by mail allows a person to sit, research, contemplate and have a drink while voting.
Like a civilized society should be!
But what if you learn of NEW salacious claims surrounding HUNTER BIDEN?
Got a flu shot once and spent that season dealing with a series of 24-hour fevers that laid me the fuck out. Haven’t had one since. Or the flu.
Now that I approach the wrong side of 55 I am going to have to change that. Not looking forward to it.
You really don’t have to. The key is to be anti social and stay away from people.
Can do!
Get my flu, and now COVID shots simultaneously right around my birthday every October without fail.
I did get the shingles vaccinations this year. That second shot will lay you the fuck out for a day.
Maybe that’s why I stopped at the first shingles shot.
That’s what I have done. My doctor hasn’t told me to get shingles yet, is that 55+?
I think it’s over 50. All I know is Mrs. Horatio had shingles once and that was enough for me to go get two shots.
Yeah, it’s over 50. The second shot, like you said, is a bitch, but it’s better than the alternative.
Our little black kitten knocked a paper shopping bag off the counter top, crawled inside it, and has turned himself into an adorable little mini-panther/trapdoor-spider. Batting the big cats right in the nose. So I got that going for me, which is nice.
They do like to MacGyver our household implements that way.
OMG DO U FACEBOOK LIVE?????..
oof, Hungover Litre ain’t gonna like that (when he comes to)
Hammers will probably be beat by multiple goals again today, but I’d bet either Ward-Prowse or Kudus manages to find Antonio for at least one West Ham goal today.
Handsome Mikel not fucking around. They scored before I remembered to put the TV on.
Me too, dammit!🤓
That’s why you should never turn it off.
Or just put Alexa in charge…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nwuiSuX2h8o
Doing the maths, I will have been at my present job for 24 years in Smarch. If I can just extend that sentence by 50% (and they leave me alone enough that I don’t snap and kill anyone) – I get to 62 and can retire. Not Alpha Dawg retire like yeah right, butat least with Medicare/SS/what’s left of 401k etc. My needs are fairly minimal.
My retirement math is that I was planning on dying twenty years ago.
I promised myself to cut the workload after my first stroke.
But I will definitely exploit any and all subsequent disabilities for work stuff. Pity me, respect me, whatever. It’s the paying what’s important, the paying.
I keep telling my employer that whenever they try to do things to make work “fun”: I am not here for fun. I am here to work in return for a paycheck that clears every two weeks, along with the healthcare. Give me the money you would otherwise spend on whatever HR considers “fun.” I promise you I will make better use of it.
Yeah, I don’t want to go bowling with those assholes. They can gossip about me all they want, Hippo ain’t care. FUCK YOU, PAY ME.
Make sure to send out a DM to Gary Kubiak, letting him know y’all is Eskimo Brothers!
If Paquetá comes back (end of the month) and West Ham is still losing and can’t score, then I’d consider removing Moyes. He’s done an awful lot right.
Flags fly forever. I am hoping there is a “voluntary retirement” agreed for season’s end.
Right on. I keep pictures of Babe Ruth and Bill Graham in my work space to remind me of the personality and ability I’d like to project to others. I’ll be adding some version of this for the rest of my life. He really does as well as a manager can do against the blood-oil-money clubs, and he does it with class.
On his last visit to Old Trafford, I want him to shout “How my ass taste?” to the home support at the final whistle.
Thanks Hippo Sir. This is all we got now so let’s ride! Napoli plays today at 3 here so in a couple of hours. Getting Yeah Right set for a potential trip there in September, where we should program him to look up Marika.
I’d try here first YR.
Also from Napoli. A true World Heritage site.
#HillsAreAlive
Side note: how amazing is it when you can drink the tap water in a place? HERE IS LIFE and it won’t make you die of typhoid or anything
Can’t remember if it’s typhoid or typhus I’m vaxxed against, but it’s probably expired either way so I’ll just avoid lice and untreated water. Seems like a good plan anyhoo
I think they are both water bourn, but do not recall for sure. I believe part of the reason I rarely get sick is because I have been inoculated against everything and anything that South America, Africa and the Middle East could throw at me over the past 4 decades.
Submariners had to get every vaccination that existed because we were locked tightly together in a can for months and there was no doctor (we did have a highly trained Corpsman though). I never got sick once during my enlistment.
I still have my World Health Organization shot record booklet from my Naval records and since then I have always maintained my proper vaccination status to this day. I filled it up and actually had to start a new one that is stapled to the first one. The first one has a label on the front that has my name and RTC Great Lakes as my address (that was my boot camp).
After I got out I would always have the nurses enter each new vax I got onto the cards, just for souvenir value. The latest entry was a flu vaccine last September.
I’ve stopped getting flu shots and have not had an issue with it. People around me come down with it hard, but I seem to just aviod getting it. I do have 1 yellow shot card totally filed out and the second half filed. Covid card is still in the wallet, ran into that the other day looking for an old phone number.
Ended up at a goth night, my youth was adorable. I’m sure there’s a male equivalent, but taking the bra off at the end of a day is true glorious. Also came back to find a bottle of wine as a hotel gift which I see no reason not to open now. Cheers to y’all!
Oh and how sweet are they, it’s the same wine I ordered at the happy hour so they took note of what I like!
They are courting your continued patronage.
When harvesting your personal information goes right…