In these Off-season Open Threads, I’ll sum up the week that was, provide you with TMI-style information, and throw some random spaghetti at the wall and see if it sticks.
This week, I took Tuesday off to make it a Four Day Weekend. It rained both Monday and Tuesday, so I didn’t get a chance to go play golf, but it was really nice to just sit at home in bed while the rain lulled me to sleep.
I slept a lot. It was very nice.
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Last time, I mentioned that I had just finished my latest workout program and I was testing out my strength. I got new PR’s in bench press, deadlift, and squats. I’m very close to doing 800 lbs for all three lifts. I hope to get there sometime this year
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I came back to work on Wednesday and, boy, retirement cannot come fast enough. I’ve figured out I’m at less than four years, which is good. The GiveAShit is still on the fritz.
I’ve always encouraged my employees to take vacations or other time off to address their personal life stuff but I’m going to double down on that this year. Company loyalty is a myth. Take care of yourself and your loved ones. They are the reason you work.
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To further comment on BFC’s comment from the other day when I requested post topics:
Balls takes up curling
I have discovered that the Pasadena Ice Rink actually has offered Learn To Curl classes in the past! Nothing is on the schedule for the immediate future, but if anything pops up, I’m doing this!
Balls revisits the LA live music scene
There is a Cruel World festival at the Rose Bowl in May featuring Adam Ant, Blondie, Duran Duran, Gary Numan, General Public, Heaven 17, Ministry, Simple Minds, Soft Cell, The Alarm, The Jesus and Mary Chain, The Stranglers, The Motels, Tones on Tail, and a bunch of other bands. Tickets are $229 + $27 in fees for a total of $256.
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Does anyone have any other suggestions for me to write posts about?
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The AFL season starts on Thursday Night/Friday morning March 7 with a weird Round Zero. I don’t know exactly why the AFL is doing this, but there will be four games in Round Zero. The teams that play in those games will then have a bye in Rounds Two, Three, Five, and Six. Then, there will be more byes around mid season. So, those 8 teams will actually have two byes.
Yeah, I don’t get it. It’s weird. However, the game itself is amazing, so I’m rolling with it. A more detailed preview will be coming soon
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Your weekly Psych gif:
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Your weekly hot girl pic:
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Your weekly music video:
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I’m assuming there are sports on tonight, but honestly I don’t care. Today, I’m debuting a new feature! I will pick a historical event and you share where you were and what was going on there. Of course, I will share my experiences.
Today’s Historical Event:
Where were you and what were you doing when Princess Diana died?
I was in Vegas with friends. The news broke in the early evening and tons of people were talking about it in the casinos and bars. Did I try to take advantage of girls going crazy about Diana’s death to get laid? You bet your ass! Was I successful?
No, I was not.
What say you? Where were you and what happened where you were when Princess Diana died?
Is there a college program that has fallen farther from being the absolute best to pretty much completely irrelevant than UCLA basketball?
Indiana
Florida State, Penn State, and USC foobawl
Tennessee women’s hoops
WVU cross country (seriously, they won three national championships in the ’80s)
Army football
UCLA basketball is so horrible I make fun of my dad for wanting to watch it.
YOU GO GLORIA YOU KNOW FOODS THAT START WITH Q!!!
TREBEK!
RIP to a legend.
Ok, the guido bit here is nawt convincing, I give it a D for plot twist. Also, good on Wesley Snipes for knowing Spanish!
“Guido”? I’m OFFENDED
You should be! If they’re gonna stereotype Italian-Americans they should at least make them look cool!
We are cool, we taught America how to be cool. Well, black culture have had a HUGE impact on the whole idea of cool. Jazz, rock and roll, dressing cool, etc.
You know, I really love buying stuff online. I just bought a cool architects lamp.
I’m setting up an VFX studio here in NoVa since I’m here half the year now, looking after my mother (we take turns). Today I built an electric sit/stand desk for my monitors that raises and lowers at the push of a button. Now I’m going to put a lamp on it.
I call this my VFX East Coast Operations Center, because that’s what Howard Hughes would do. (My corporation is named in honor of Hughes)
This is all in the basement of the house I grew up in, that my parents bought in 1963. I used to play in this basement when I was two years old.
I’m working out of my mom’s basement folks.
I’m working out of my mom’s basement folks.
That’s the title of his manifesto.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWQczrtvWKc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eMK4cfXj5c0
Cypress Hill fits the mood and time frame. Good jorb, Dok!
Quality
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cTXJxoa10Tc
Yeah, that’s it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZPriyWZvxU
I remember a fantastic mosh pit to these guys back in ’87-’88 at UConn.
Christ I’m so old and creaky.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vq9pabvOvl4
I guess the Princess Di thing sparked middle school/early high school era lizard music brain.
Rosie Perez’s character has even worse taste in men than I do
But she also should know that you test/audition for Jeopardy
When I got on there was literally no basketball required.
Sure, but you go to them, they don’t call you
In case anyone here is interested in joining myself, Spam, and I believe Bug-Eyed Boo as Jeopardy contestants, here’s the process, at least as I went through in the mid-90’s.
1). Local contestant search, in my case at one of the CT casinos. You go into a large room and take a written test. You get a piece of paper, 10 questions. Get 7 right you qualify for the next round. PRO-TIP: You can, (at least back then), get back in line as many times as you want. So if you don’t know you hit 70% right out of the gate, (and these question were much harder than anything on the show), go look ’em up and try again. Just make sure you get the same colored piece of paper you did last time.
Seriously, they have to have changed that.
2). Here’s the real test. You’ll get a time and date to show up somewhere, in my case NYC, for another written test and a screen test. You’ll play the actual game during the test. You needed to get 35/50 right in this round. Sit in the back; the group that I was with wasn’t shy about helping each other out. Then you have to take a test using the clicker and answering questions, give them 5 fascinating facts about yourself, (maybe more; back then it was a 5 show max for each winner), then you’re in the hopper for a year.
3). They call you and tell you you’ve been picked to be on the show and when you need to be in LA for taping. And, oh yeah, you’re paying for the flight and hotel stay.
I did the tryout in Culver City for Los Angeles residents who could be called at the last minute in case a scheduled contestant couldn’t make it for the show taping. I passed but they never called me. They said I was “too handsome” and that my cock was too big, or something to that effect.
Cypress HILL! YES
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BV3CYz34ziE
That “possibly while high” line kills me every time.
Sexy gals in full one piece bathing suits? EARLY 90s!
One piece bathing suits are amaizing
The Manhattans re in the reear view, can’ tlet that sht get int he way of bourbon so drinking it straight and witching with beers,
legit efficient
Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’d run you all over with a Zamboni for a shot at Nat from Shoresy.
Total Sniper
No love for Miig?
I have too much respect for Sanguinet.
Sniper.
Legit.
Not sure if this is what you meant, but…
https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/british-columbia/keilani-rose-shot-recovering-1.6547444
WTF!?
It’s a long burn, but it’s basically an odd couple buddy comedy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGKRr0NmgFM
Well, whatever. I like it.
Gus Johnson is now openly discussing what the betting lines are for UConn’s point guard to get a triple-double, (needs 1 pt and 1 assist), and it’s so, so obvious that Gus bet a lot of money on Newton getting a triple double.
He got the triple double with 30 seconds or so left by passing to a guy who was 0-7 and who promptly drained a 3.
Well, at least Paul Newman won’t have Gus’s legs broke!
Oh shit, within 2 minutes
“Reverse discrimination”
“Men understand how things work”
“Out of Time” from the U.K. version of The Rolling Stones 1966 album Aftermath. The U.S. release of this song was cut shorter.
This is a true Rolling Stones track as it features both Brian Jones and Ian Stewart. The song was recorded at RCA Hollywood; there were all sorts of exotic instruments around the studio from previous artist’s sessions. Brian Jones began experimenting with a marimba, an instrument he had never seen before. His marimba playing figures prominently in this song, he learned it that fast. Original Stone Ian Stewart is on the organ.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXP1MSFwMnc
Stewart was the one who used to say “let’s go, my little shower of shit” before every show.
I absolutely bought this beer because of the name.
Did I learn later that it’s 11%? Yes. Yes I did.
Im driving to my friends wedding in Pittsburgh in May. I’m stopping at treehouse on the way to pick up beer for the groom. I might say I forgot it and keep it
What day in May? Oh, sorry, won’t be here until literally the day after you leave. Damn.
Hes getting married May 3rd with a cocktail party afterwards. Then the reception is 2 hours east the next day at her families place for a giant Derby tailgate.
I will be there St. Patricks day weekend though
Even at my drunkiest, worstest, I’d never do any of that. Holy fuck, that’s fucking torture.
Sincerely sorry. There’s not enough liquor and therapy in the world for that.
Fuck.
How bad is Altoona/Ebensburg? That’s where the Derby party is
Do you like your shit sandwich on wheat or rye?
Beware the Altoids!
Isn’t 2 hours east of Pittsburgh Amish country?
Or did ‘Banshee’ lie to me?
Depending on how I feel, (I’ve been fighting a cold to a draw the last couple of days), I’m going up tomorrow. It’s been too long.
“He ain’t going nowhere, the bakery ain’t open yet”
HOLY SHIT THEY ANTICIPATED ANDY REID
Dead Letter Office by REM is one of their very best.
For future reference, even though I’m a woman, I’m TOTALLY GOOD if you bring me a glass of water when I say I’m thirsty. I will say THANK YOU FOR THE WATER
But she’s totally right that the term ‘screwing’ is for carpenters. Both ‘making love’ and ‘fucking’ are preferable
I will always hold the door for a woman; I will ask them if they need help if they’re carrying something heavy; I will give them my seat on a crowded whatever; if they don’t like it, fine. But i’m still gonna do it. Because if I didn’t, my mom would find me and hit me with a rolling pin.
Offering, and then either following through if accepted or withdrawing if it’s not is just the mark of a good human. Doesn’t need to be a man/woman thing, but if that nets more people just being decent then I don’t mind if it is
When I grow up, I want to be Shoresy. Fucking love that show.
It’s so fucking good. Better than Letterkenny, and I do not say that lightly.
Just finished season 10 – complete shit
S10 was not one of their best, but I think they did a special episode for Women’s Day or Valentine’s Day that year that was really good.
Gotta check that out.
Fucking degens.
Give your balls a tug
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5_7vLr94DQ
I guess gals didn’t drive back then? OH WAIT THEY DID yet they couldn’t have the Chicana girlfriend START THE DAMN CAR and have it running when they were fleeing their con?
It’s been years since I watched that but wasn’t one of the bits that she was always studying for Jeopardy when she needed to be doing other things?
“She knows 15 foods that start with the letter ‘Q’!”
Quince!
You are correct, but I assume most Jeopardy drivers can start a car. I’LL TAKE BASIC AUTOMOBILE OPERATION FOR $600 ALEX
Dang, I’m commenting in old threads.
I hate that.
I got your blender recc, so all good!
That’s a quality blender
Two Manhattans banged down; Miller Lites going down icy cold.
Do they taste great or are they less filling?
First one and then the other!
They are getting the job done, all that matters. I am a cheap drinker. Always hve been.
I get the whole anti-counterfeiting thing, but damn old hundos were pretty money
Great photo, or greatest photo ever?
Might be the best reply ever.
It is a cat. Ergo, not a good picture.
I’m definitely a dog-first person, but I do appreciate the ‘fuck you, you work for me’ attitude of a good cat.
https://twitter.com/ClassicStrips/status/1761334858096263362
Holy shit, this movie is dirty! How clueless was I that I missed the really OBVIOUS eating pussy reference as a kid?
Pleased that I did pick up on that right away, but I was also 22 or 23.
I’m not 100% sure, but I think I learned about oral sex from an ad in the back of an Archie McFee catalog
What movie u watching?
1992 White Men Can’t Jump
Ah, a classic. “Vegetables that being with Q”
When he says he’s going to put his mouth where that money is? Agreed, how on earth *did* you miss that? It wasn’t subtle.
I’m thinking it just didn’t register because I didn’t know that was a thing at the time. I also didn’t notice Rosie Perez’s wasn’t wearing a bra though it’s incredibly obvious now
Oh, I noticed.
I was seventeen when that movie came out, so you can be damned sure that I noticed, and then an hour later I was able to notice again.
Balls! You were correct. There is sports on tonight.
Release the Kraken!
The Dr. Mrs. says she was at home (Orange County, at the time) watching TV when Diana died. I don’t remember where I was or what I was doing. Certainly not driving around in a White Fiat Uno, I can promise you that.
The girl i was dating was crushed when Diana died. My quote, “Who fucking cares? She’s royalty and they were fucking with America until we kicked their asses.” So, yeah, no loving that night.
One time I took the train down to San Diego for a Raiders game and one of the fellow fans on that train was an employee at my local Sizzler.
All I saw was something about running train with a employee at Sizzler.
GEMS
I have absolutely no idea where I was or what I was doing when Diana died. I’m not even sure when it happened.
As someone of largely Irish extraction I’m pretty proud of that.
Oh there are some GEMS in here
“Nah, my momma was too drunk to be an astronaut”
I was also in Vegas when she hit the wall in turn two!
Was with my wife, so it’s possible I scored?
I was in a bar in Harvard Square when the princess died and all the chicks were going nuts.
So you were in Hahvahd Yahd when her cah wahs pahked into a wahl?
Tried to edit to make it nawt big, but failed, I guess my comment is just living large
Finished Airplane! and now watching the 1992 version of “White Men Can’t Jump” which I’m pretty sure I have watched before, but not as an adult. Already noticing that when I watched it as a kid I had no idea it was set on Venice Beach. Also, I know things were better when I was a kid because they’re remaking all that stuff now instead of doing anything original, even cheesy basketball movies like this.
YOU SAID WE WERE GOING TO SIZZLER!
I believe I was finishing workups/pre-deployment preparations before going to the Med with as a squad leader in Lima Co, 3/6 with the 24th MEU the day the princess died.
Did you use the information to try to get laid?
The Lady LemonJello was amenable, as I was soon leaving her and LimeJello for 6 months.
I do not remember when she died, because I do not care. Now when Regan was shot or the shuttle disaster, those I remember.
Shuttle go boom I was watching Scooby-Doo Doo and it was interrupted and I was mad.
I was walking out if the student union at college when I heard about it. Reminds me of some of the jokes, Did you hear about the first woman astronaut, she went to pieces when they let her drive. Did not say they were good jokes.
Ooof. Although super uninformed. Sally Ride was the first American woman in space (Third overall) and she had already flown more than one mission at that point and wasn’t involved with the Challenger mission. And both the captain and pilot were dudes. Actually, I kinda want to go back in time just a bit and make this joke about the Titan submersible, it would be deliciously absurd
https://www.reddit.com/r/IASIP/comments/14gdcl2/titan/
This is still my favorite Titan joke.
I was taking a Chemistry final in high school.
The teacher left the room, came back in and told us about it. We thought he was kidding, but it turns out he was not.
I was at summer camp when Mike Tyson beat Spinks and nobody believed the camp director when he told us Tyson won by knockout in like 40 seconds.
I always liked the “how many astronauts can you fit into a Volkswagen?” one.
What color were Christa McAuliffe’s eye?
Blue. One blew this way and one blew that way.
Like Armedandhammered said, no one said they were good jokes.
I did NAWT download nearly enough stuff during the golden age of Napster, then I was distinctly lazy about ripping and returning DVDs I got back when Netflix was on physical media. Streaming is great, but also such a huge scam, do kids nowadays even know about removing DRM? Does it make me old to have playable copies of things with multiple non-cloud backups?
Cold medicine brain ” Maybe I will watch more MLS this year.”
/no I will not unless very ill
Even if very ill there’s probably something else on
Watching the Fighting Horatios now.
They’re not doing well offensively, but defensively they seem to have their shit back together from the Omaha debacle.
Congratulations on the Scots reenacting Bannockburn on Team England today.
All I knew is that she banged Mo Fayeds son, he was the Mighty Whitey owner before Khaaaaannn
No idea what I was doing. That was the start of my 2nd year at uni, so I was probably really drunk and high, and definitely not in class.
I think I was 15 when Di died (sidenote: Fuck Candle in the Wind, an adaptation of the Misfits Die, Die, Die My Darling would be great. Die Di Died My Darling?) but it made almost no impression whenever I heard about it. Which makes sense since teenagers are all pretty much narcissists. I remember seeing stuff about it on the news and being confused about why it was such a big deal. Most of what I knew about her in the first place was from reading tabloid headlines while in line with my mom at the supermarket and from when Entertainment Tonight got left on after the news.
My first night on the boat in Kiwiland it transpired that one of the people at my dinner table was considering moving to Melbourne. There was an Aussie lady who informed him that if he moved to Melbourne he would have to pick an AFL team or risk being left out of every conversation. I mentioned that I liked St. Kilda because of Miss Fisher and subsequent conversation revealed that outside of Victoria (where Melbourne is), every Australian state has 2 AFL teams except for Tasmania, which has zero.
All of this to say, Tassie needs a team, and it should be called the Devils, and we should all support them if they ever start to exist!
They’re getting a team!! I’ll reveal all in this year’s AFL Preview! Coming next week!
!!!
Well crap, I gots to subscribe and support them now. TO THE INTERNET!
I think that was the weekend immediately before I started high school. I know it was definitely the first major international news story that happened when we got AOL dial-up.
I was trying to watch SNL, and they kept trying to break in and give me updates I gave zero fuckshits about. Rich white lady ded, ok, I got it. Back to the yuk-yuks.
I was also like 5-6 beers in, and making inappropriate jokes.