Good Sunday morning everyone!
We’ve reached Mid-May, the NFL schedule release has happened and we have entered the doldrums of the offseason. Sure, the NBA and NHL playoffs have been moderately entertaining (including 2 NBA game 7s today with that match up between the Wolves and Denver having serious potential) and baseball has been good as far as I’m concerned, but we’re still a long way away from any meaningful football type activities.
Hell, I guess that’s part of the reason why I’M here. Goddamn. That’s a lot of responsibility, man!
I’ll do my best.
We will be breaking out the exotic spice kit again today as we make another culinary venture to Northern India and Pakistan with today’s menu.
We are making Keema Aloo, or as possibly the title of this feature alluded, it can also be called Aloo Keema. “Keema” being the meat part of the equation and “aloo” representing potatoes.
Keema aloo is essentially a curry. It’s got a lovely combination of ground beef and potatoes with a very helpful assist from tomato, serrano pepper, some yogurt and an everlovin’ shitload of spices.
Sure, I get it. Your brain is saying “Beef?” Then it’s saying “India?” It may come as a surprise to you but some folks in India do consume beef. Mostly in the northern region. Traditionally this dish is made with ground lamb but it can indeed be found made with ground beef in India.
Weird!
You can officially relax your sensibilities now
Again the big inspiration for our dish came from the spice kit youngest right gifted me for Christmas, because it contains a bunch of unique spices that I don’t really get a lot of opportunity to fuck around with.
See?
You should be able to recall the use of many of these spices during our lamb qorma episode a few weeks back.
I promise I’m going to find uses for this stuff dammit!
Which led to tons of research, the reading of many, many recipes and subsequently this here menu I’m bringing you today.
It’s meat and potatoes for Chrissake! I’m pretty sure even I can’t fuck up meat and potatoes.
Let’s do this thing.
Keema Aloo!
recipe inspiration courtesy teaforturmeric.com
Whole Spices*
1 2-inch cinnamon stick
1 tsp cumin seeds
3 whole cloves
1/2 tsp coriander seeds, optional
1/2 tsp whole black peppercorns
Aloo Keema
1/3 cup neutral oil like canola
1 large onion, finely chopped
5-6 cloves garlic, minced
1 inch piece ginger, minced
1 lb ground beef, 80-20% please
1 large tomato (or 2 small), finely chopped
1-2 Serrano
2 tsp coriander powder
1 tsp cumin powder
3/4 tsp turmeric powder
1/4 tsp red chilli powder – kashmiri was what I had on hand.
1/4 tsp fresh ground black pepper
1 1/2 tsp kosher salt, or to taste
2 tbsp plain, whole milk yogurt – I used plain Greek yogurt
1 medium to large russet potato, peeled and cubed into 1/2″ cubes
Garnishing
1/8 to 1/4 tsp garam masala
If you’re sitting there thinking “Jesus fuck, yeah right, who has all of that shit in their spice cabinet?” I hear you. If you were to stick with cumin, garam masala and chili powder, maybe a little cayenne as your spices in this dish you could do a reasonable facsimile. I am lucky – or insane – enough to have all of these on hand.
I know, I know. Sounds like a lot of work for this dish but I’ll walk you through it. Seriously, once you’ve done your mincing, dicing and spice grinding this fucker comes together really fast.
First we will take a quick second to play with our food. It’s OK.
Alright, enough fun for the day. Now chop up those tomatoes and that serrano.
Very good.
Just line up them spices in play on the fridge next to the stove.
I still think that’s so fucking cool.
*The original recipe said to use whole spices while sautéing the onions which was of course followed by many reviewers who said they didn’t enjoy chomping into whole cloves and coriander seeds. I split the difference and went ahead and ground those in my spice grinder.
Dude! This smells fucking incredible!
Of course since we are dabbling in Pakistani/Indian cuisine again I decided to make naan as a side dish. Again. Recipe here.
Mix the dough.
After kneading for 10 minutes we have our dough ball. Into a lightly oiled large bowl it will go. Cover it with a clean towel.
After letting the dough rise for an hour we shape into 8 smaller dough balls and cover again.
These will rise for another hour and then they are ready to cook. We’ll get back to that in a bit.
Lots of spices today. In addition to our “whole” spices which we ground there are additional “ground” spices. Let’s gather them together now.
Turmeric and Kashmiri chili powder to start.
Gather the rest and mix. Remember, these are the spices that go in the keema NOT the whole, now ground, spices which are cooked with the onion that starts this dish.
This dish works easiest when you pre-chop everything. Your tomatoes and chili, the onion, the ginger and garlic and the potatoes. Shit comes together fast so do the prep work first.
Cube the potatoes and soak in water to prevent them from going brown.
Start the dish by browning the onion with the “Whole” spices in the oil. Well shit. I left the cinnamon whole!
After 8-10 minutes they should get nice and golden.
This smells insane by the way. Open your windows! Piss of your neighbors! It’s fun!
Add the ginger and the garlic and cook for about a minute until you’re drooling like Pavlov’s dog.
Next we add the ground beef.
Cook and stir for a few minutes to just lightly brown the beef. Do NOT drain the fat. Which is just fucking awesome by the way.
Next we add the tomatoes, serrano and the plain yogurt along with the other spices.
Then cook for about 5 minutes.
You are going to be in olfactory fucking nirvana making this fucker.
Next we add the potatoes.
Slap a lid on here, reduce the flame to medium-low and set a timer for 23 minutes.
Yes! Twenty three, I said!
Now we can finish cooking the naan while the keema aloo is simmering.
Heat up your cast iron skillet, add a bit of oil and get busy.
Don’t you folks know this fucking drill already?
I thought so.
And cook until all are done. I only cooked four pieces of the naan today which means? I have 4 naan balls in the freezer for future use! Oh fucking hell yes I do.
This naan shit is getting epic by the way. Keep doing them reps and it just gets better each time. The texture of the naan was perfect. Had that tiny little crisp edge thing and a fluffy interior. Hot damn! We’re seeing real improvement here folks.
The keema is ready.
Feel free to chuck that cinnamon stick now.
Stir in the garam masala at this point. Think I used about a teaspoon in this.
You could go for the full on starch explosion here and serve this with rice but I just served with a side of some hummus and the naan.
And here’s a lovely close up.
This is absolutely delicious. It had every single goddamn taste bud just a dancin’ and a singin’ and in my mouth.
It is wonderful. Fuck yes. It’s got everything. It’s hearty, satisfying, a little exotic. It has a lovely light bit of heat from the serranos and the kashmiri pepper but it is by no means “hot.”
This is the best meat and potato dish I’ve ever had.
AND it has earned a spot in the regular dinner rotation.
Use your naan, rip off a piece and just grab a big wad of the keema aloo with your hand. Stuff that fucker right in your pie hole! Tear off another piece and grab up some hummus and do the same. I fucking dig this style of eating where your naan/tortilla is your utensil.
This is a fucking beauty people. It is absolutely worth getting ALL of those spices in your spice cabinet.
Sensational!
Branch out. Try new cuisines.
Eat the whole goddamn world!
Thanks everyone for stopping by.
Always a pleasure.
See you next week a’ight?
A’ight!
PEACE!
Canadia up 1-0 on the Swiss. You can never canton Switzerland being competitive in hockey, ever.
/I should have been a writer on Retard Doctor
See, from the title of the show I figured it was the kid from the Twilight Zone episode.
Oh, you have cancer? You better get better. It’s terminal? Corn field.
It’s a real good thing you did, Anthony.
Was the Iranian President a DFO lurker? Just a halfway paying attention New Yorker? Is that why he feared crashing if he took Jets?
https://www.cnn.com/webview/middleeast/live-news/raisi-iran-president-helicopter-crash
He’s with Kobe Bryant now…
Yes, yes, tragic, loss of life, etc etc, but that was a Bell 412 helicopter with Pratt & Whitney Canada PT6T-3D Twin-Pac engines. After WWII Pratt & Whitney divided turbine engine manufacturing, with the large engines (bombers, airliners, etc) being built in the U.S. and the smaller engines (helicopters, regional and business jets) being built in Canada. Both share the same R&D developments. Those are two very different markets so the division has turned out to be very successful and complementary. Oh yes and the Iranian president is probably dead.
Here’s a cutaway of a P&W PT6T TwinPac engine set. When the helicopter made a “hard landing” (meaning it crashed) the engine set probably detached from its mounts and crushed the Iranian president even further, probably irreparably damaging the engine and making it a total loss. You can’t just overhaul an engine after crushing someone like that. It’s a write-off now.
https://ibb.co/2yhsRmJ
This time the Isrealis, Ukrainians and the Democrat Party has gone too far!
Sorry, Dad’s been watching Fox News. Watching this Youtube clips on repeat to deprogram.
The West Wing: Sam Seaborn defends Ainsley Hayes (youtube.com)
I ran into this somewhere this past week and though it is pretty cool. I think it’s a shot from the ISS.
Truely appreciate all of Bricks Space Force digs here today. I will never tire of those.
/ until they go kinetic on some enemy which I highly doubt in my lifetime
You ran into Lake Michigan last week?
To be fair, Lake Michigan is pretty big, and hard to miss.
You are not kidding about opening the windows on this one man. I’ll need to try this one day just to enjoy the aroma while it’s cooking.
So weird that the Prem trophy has a crown on it.
What I wouldn’t give [searches under couch cushions] $3.55, btw, for Pep to say to reporters, “Alex Ferguson can suck it!”.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0CrSOPGvblI
Had Arsehole and City of Men tied and were equal in goal difference, what is the next tie-breaker? Home wins? Maybe shared title?
Each position in the Premier League table is decided by the following tiebreakers if teams finish on the same number of points:
Goal difference
Goals scored
Team who collected most points in head-to-head record
Who scored the most away goals in head-to-head
From an NBC Sports article…
Away goals?
WCS needs to hang up the phone on that dude that is considering suicide and post an edited version of The Simpsons gif of “Here come the pretzels” with “Here come the fans on the field”.
I don’t know how he does it. I’d be the worst. I’d say, “Just don’t make a mess for anyone to clean up and don’t hold up traffic”.
Jesus, I’m terrible.
“What are you wasting time on the phone for? That pistol ain’t gonna fire itself.”
Congrats to Scotchy and Man City.
I am going to drown my sorrows at the Thread City Beer Fest for the next four hours. Great season for the Gunners.
Take me down to Thread City
Where the sewing bees are intense
And the Grandma’s are pretty
Please take me home, yeah, yeah
Pickford with the double-birds.
Since a replica of the Prem cup is already at Arsenal, the team should get to dry hump it.
If they were Mormon they could soak it.
I thought that was a handball.
Once again I don’t understand VAR
West Ham, you teasing bastards.
My Fubo Canadian feed is only 5+ minutes behind. JFC.
Well, That’s Settled Then: Apparently the PA is asking Man City fans to not run onto the field after the game.
Man City Fan: “Guess I’ll stop by the pub and celebrate the W.”
PA: DO NOT STORM THE FIELD AFTER THE GAME!
Man City Fan: “Huh. Hadn’t even thought about that. I think I’ll go down to the pitch and celebrate with all the other fans!”
ARS – EVE: Peacock announcers don’t yell PALO! or even CROSSBAR!
Hispanos 1
Anglos 0
Looks like a lot of work fool.
Twas.
Post has more dents in it than Evander Holyfield’s head.
This seems like an ideal for a 30-yard piss missile from Thomas Partey. Thing of beauty in a meaningless win.
https://ibb.co/N7KxKFs
Gregg “Break a Leg, Earn Some Dollars” Williams is the DC for the DC Defenders in the United Football League.
I’m actually watching a soccer game! I’ve never done this before.
It’s the ARS vs the EVE
They were all aiming for the Olympico for a bit there.
“Into the 6-yard box”
Hey, announcer guy, we’ll make the Houston jokes here, thankyouverymuch.
Pickford looks athletic! So long, “Thiccford”.
/updates fatwatch.xlsx
Oh, fuck, Haavertz! So close!
RODRI!
The Kazak goalie has seen more rubber than Houston.
We would have also accepted “your mom”.
To be fair, I doubt Houston bothered to see much after about 183.
USA men are up 9-0 on Kazakhstan, seemingly inspired by their female soccer peers.
https://nypost.com/2019/06/11/alex-morgan-uswnt-never-stopped-scoring-in-world-cup-opener/
Rooted against the USWMNT ever since. You need to know when to stop.
Rapinoe sealed the deal for me when she slagged the Canuck team after they lost to them in the semi’s during the Olympics.
I really dislike her considering I agree with most of her social stances.
She’s on the right side of so many issues but she’s an asshole. She’s unique, I’ll give her that.
My oldest did some meal prep last night, a chicken and pasta thingy. He cooked the pasta and then threw it into a chicken stew and then threw that into a slow cooker. Did I tell him not to do that because he would end up with a gluey, glutenous mess? I did. He’s going to eat that garbage all week out of spite.
/he’s definitely my kid
Man City is going to win 5-1, but that was a great first half of Lesser Footy.
That’s a nice reverse jinx you got there, buddy.
I wish that were true.
https://ibb.co/98ZLPRC
Leave the fat guy alone!
(His name is Porkins, ’cause he’s fat. Get it?!)
About 200 million Muslims in India that are totally cool with beef, as well as all the other religious minorities. It’s just the Hindus that don’t eat it.
So many good potato curries out there, but I try not to eat too many of em because starch. I love all carbs, but potato is probably my least fav
I would die without potatoes. In less than a week, I bet.
Haaland has flubbed two easy (for him) chances.
I don’t think I’ve ever heard a Premier League crowd this loud.
Hippo turns teevee box off, shit gets interesting. NEVAR fails.
/think I will leave it off so you and scotchy get a nice cardiac workout
Holy shit, that West Ham goal!
Holy Shit, West Ham! What a goal.
No idea why there are two photos there.
It appears I’ve Blair Witched myself.
That’s a great response by Tomayasu and Company.
And God bless the optimism of the announcers thinking that Arsenal will get another goal and win, (which I would say is likely), AND that West Ham is going to outscore Man City by at least 2 goals the rest of the way in their game, which were it to happen would be accompanied by the cracking of The Seventh Seal and trumpets announcing the approach of the Angel of Death.
Everton?
Excellent response by the Arseholes.
Austria(?) is beating the fjords out Norway, btw.
There it is.
Today, May 19th, is Space Force Ridicule Day
https://ibb.co/pXwnZr8
https://ibb.co/GWN6hN1
https://ibb.co/ryqXNBp
What’s with that right-side pauldron, anyway? That’s to protect him when he’s swordfighting?
That is pretty fuckin’ sad.
This is going to be one of those games where Arsenal has 57 chances at a goal and loses 1-0.
And it doesn’t make a difference. They may as well lose 15-0 and clean up at the betting window.
[West Ham makes it over the half line]
“What strange land is this?”
Looks like West Ham is well done.
/I’ll save you the trouble and hang myself from the deck
(That looks dry and terrible)
How’d you get a pic of every ham my mother ever made?
Bill Belichick, where else?
Even Belichick has standards.
Did I just say Man City was up 1-0?
I meant 2-0.
Foden! And what a pass by…that guy.
No idea what his name is but pretty sure he’d be the star of 22 other Premier League teams.
at least Handsome Mikel is still mighty handsome
“Meat and potatoes!?!?” (Every Irish person gets excited)
“Wait, the meat isn’t boiled?” (Every Irish person leaves)
Best of luck, all y’all Pistoleros de Agua
Man City’s already up 1-0 on West Ham. Arsenal-Everton is mere exhibition.
Here’s the Mediterranean Sea carved into North America:
https://ibb.co/T4Sx7b4
Those damn commies! I knew they were up to something!
At least they left Peedroh alone.
You’re close to Portugal already!
Damn close.
Need to move that lower and to the right for maximum. Electoral College benefit.
Sorry about that, Georgia and Mexico. But as you know…
My property on the Chicago Isthmus just skyrocketed in value!
Try new cuisines
Me: That’s a great idea! [Puts whole grain mustard on bologna sandwich instead of regular mustard]
Next week: Dijon mustard
whoa now, let’s not say zanything we can’t take back!
This is basically a homemade Hamburger helper with some exotic spices.
Anyone can handle it.
/Horatio goes into the kitchen to “handle it”
&ct=g