Do you like footed ball? Boy howdy, then does I ever gots GOOD NEWS for you!
(I mean, other than the lack of our beloved Early Bird Special this week. That kinda blows goats.)
USA choo-choo-chooses Villa/Cherries for the 10:00 broadcast. Are the Villans becoming a media darling? Oy yes, they are. Will this eventually grate on Hippo’s nerves? Oh yes, it will. But whatever deflects from the Redshite filth is fine and dandy. If you are a sick fuck, stream City of Men disemboweling Sham Town (Peacock). Light window overall.
Litre and Hippo can has Spotlight Clubhouse Derby?? Yes indeed, as Everton welcomes Handsome Marco Silva (ie, the One Who Got Away) to Goodison Park, one last time (12:30, NBC). It’s about time that somebody finally exploits the Toffees back line (PHRASING), and Alex Iwobi seems the man to do it.
Must be “weird-ass Daylight Savings divergence” weekend, as there are 3 Sunday fixtures at 10:00 – highlighted by Men Untied away to Fronk’s Hammers (Peacock). Loser finally gets to sack their manager? BET TEH DRAW. USA is annoyingly showing Bonesaws/Chelski instead. GROSS.
To the JV Thunderdome!
Nebraska (+25.5) at THEEEEEEE (yada yada) – Noon (Fox)
Cornfuckers thought they were people for a second, then Indiana reality kicked them in the bollocks for 60 minutes. Their reward for not folding the program? A trip to Columbus to get penetrated unlubed, all over again.
Washington (+6.5) at Indiana – Noon (BTN)
This is a very interesting contest that should have a better timeslot and non-BTN coverage. But Hippo is here FOAR it. Trap game for the Hoosiers, 100%. Let’s see how they handle matters.
Steerfuckers North (+20) at Ole Miss – Noon (ESPN)
Boomer Sooner ain’t liking their new membership in The South, that’s fer sure. Brent Venables is going to get fired, and right soon. Johnny Reb needs to win out if’n it wants to make the playoffs, no room for further mulligans.
Illinois (+21.5) at Oregon – 3:30 (CBS)
It is so strange to see this as (i) a conference fixture; and (ii) CBS’ game of the week. Can the Illini grind Quackers into their pace of play? Probably not, but I am MOAR interested than I likely should be here.
Missouri (+16.5) at Alabama – 3:30 (ABC)
Nobody believes in the Tigers, and rightly so. But they just keep on ekeing out wins. Now, they go to Tuscaloosa – with Roll Damn Tide having their backs squarely against the wall. This oughtta be good, and the stakes are high for both.
Steerfuckers South (-18.5) at Vanderbilt – 4:15 (SECN)
No way, it couldn’t happen again. COULD IT???? God, I would die laughing.
This here Bama/Mizzou fixture is making me re-consider The South’s readiness to rise again, PAAAAWWWWWLLLLLL
Hitler Mice, wilting before Maroni’s trumpet
Good teams win, great teams cover. Congrats Cornfuckers.
Praise Gamblor?
Fading Hippo has made me a wealthy man. Praise indeed.
…yaaayyy…
Fading Hippo is the name of Brick Meathook’s King Crimson’s cover band. I’ll have you know!
That’s ironic because Brick’s cover band hasn’t made me a single cent.
Do better Brick.
all should live their lives Costanza-ing Hippo
BLEERGH is about to manifest Itself in Columbus.
I’ve got a swollen member and it has nothing to do with porn. Anyway, usually I’d use a bag of frozen peas/corn. You scientists out there, would Cavendish Tuscan-herbed diced potatoes work equally well?
Did they let you keep the balls?
No. You eat those.
Use frozen peas or frozen Brussels sprouts instead. Those both suck when frozen.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWIxaOiKpSw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABdDCqSg0fc&pp=ygUjYnVybiBhZnRlciByZWFkaW5nIGRyaW5raW5nIHByb2JsZW0%3D
Love this movie
Absolutely concur.
I saved this from the ‘VID-19.
I learned a lot that day.
It’s no El Assico, but Spain’s ripoff El Classico is on.
Moar like Fake Madrid
Cuatro a nil. lol
I really gotta stop touching myself at night.
I mean it beats *not* touching yourself, doesn’t it?
During the day, it’s great!
https://youtu.be/dbwYXmvPCLU?t=10&si=NxxJYYtfOdGwjkse
Somebody do a wellness check on Redshirt – we need his vote to get counted
I always voted. I can die in peace.
It doesn’t count if you die pre-ED! (I think)
In Ohio, it counts.
ah, ok. Carry on, then!
But did you vote twice, immigrant?
-A Republican, not reading what you wrote, or anything at all, really
Driving back from the gym blasting The Lemonheads “Allison’s Starting To Happen” and taking myself back to college before realizing that song is 32 years old and driving right into a bridge abutment.
good thing u noe a good crash lawyer smgdh
“I don’t care what you’re on [lists a shit ton of drugs] it doesn’t matter. I’m on everything but roller skates, whatever it takes not to drive off the next bridge.”
-Gary Gulman
Reminder, fans of THEEEEE – this is the same Nebraska team that IU just beat by a half-hundred
Ryan Day 100% is the Samsquanch
Iwobi goal + DRAW was exactly what I’d hope for. It’s a narrow path we tread, need to stay out the relegation zone, but make sure Doucheman doesn’t get a new contract. I can handle this horrible shit ONE MOAR season, but not in our purty new stadium.
I didn’t know the Irish and the Japanese had anything in common, Notre Dame’s devastation of the United States Navy begs to differ.
you had to figure they’d be all over the seamen
Navy just keeps stepping on thier dicks.
With Vibrim soled boots.
I’d compare this to Pearl Harbor, but the Navy came back from that one.
How the fuck did Indiana get good at football?
Seriously, this went completely under the radar…
Definition of Fulhamish.
#DoucheStrong
my pussy sure do feel fresher
Special edition “Smurf jism” helmets ain’t good luck for Lane’s fellers.
Yes you beautiful bastard!
Johnny Reb really having a hard time getting it up for Booner Sooner.
How the fuck is that not a free kick you limey cunt??????
EURO DOINK!
JESUS FUCK HOW HAVE WE NOT SCORED FUUUUCCCKKK!!!!
Decilitre is learning all kinds of new phrases today!
He has headphones on now, Litrepug is a bit concerned due to my rage.
Calm down baby. Let’s dance!
https://youtu.be/7-NOZU2iPA8?si=nVFwvKuSbIrbr6IW
So, Aaron Boone is the new Dusty Baker?
“Dusty Baker” sounds like a euphemism for some kind of sexual act that Rob Ford really enjoys.
Aaron Boone and Dave Roberts managing is like a chess match.
Except it’s one of the ones that Gotham Chess reviews in his “How to Lose at Chess” series that inevitably ends by someone with three queens forcing stalemate.
This is the one time I don’t get the usually crappy Big 10 game featuring Indiana? You’ve made a powerless enemy, America!
don t was a powerless enemy of america for months and months ppl forget that
He got paper towel.
#9WIndiana
There will be no bowing down today.
Any bets on who wins the halftime chair-throwing contest?
The ghost of Bobby K cannot be defeated
Everton-Fulham on my TV?
Time to leave the clubhouse before the bottles, pill and/or liquor, start flying!
Just got home so I can rage in peace!
Wife napping, not for long when I let the expletives fly!!!
Truly, only the #DoucheStrong will survive this derby.
1st “What the fuck are you doing????” Just came out.
/immediately chastised by Decilitre
“Dad, it’s goddamn righteous fuck, get it right shithead!”
-Deci
“Notre Dame tilt is pretty much over.” (he said, trying to jinx them)
The largest camera in the world, which Brick will soon be using to take snapshots of late night LA.
That’s not what they’re using for Aaron Boone’s upcoming colonoscopy?
Two things. Though it will require an extensive cleaning in between.
Boone’s head is too far up his ass for a colonoscopy to be effective.
“Other than the goal, they kept Haaland out.”
And other than that incident Mrs. Lincoln, what did you think of the play?
Come on Navy. Do this for America.
Ah, well. Nevertheless.
Last minute equalizer for the Cherries!
Back to back games against Arsenal and villa was a doddle!
Three truths for today.
Napoli won and will remain in 1st place for another week.
Pat McAfee is the kind of guy who will eventually say, irregardless.
This stuff is as addictive as crack.
So so so many things that I don’t understand in this world.
One of them is why a shitty kicker is still a thing and who would want to listen to him talk
Descriptive vs. prescriptive. ‘irregardless’ is a word now, nobody GAS about split infinitives, ‘nonplussed’ means both ‘befuddled’ and ‘no big deal’, and ‘forte’ is now pronounced both ‘for-tay’ and ‘fort’. But GIF is still pronounced as in ‘giraffe’ and I will die on that hill.
I thought I had heard about that. But I am still witness to quite a few dimwits playing smarty pants using the word and being blasted by authority for doing so in past years. Now they update the dictionary every time the masses dumb down another part of the culture. I refuse to learn that stuff. I’m there now. I won.
Step aside Freddie Freeman, there was an overtime walk off ROUGE on a punt yesterday!
Bees losing to Tractor Boys! Fantastic start to the day.
Spoke too soon.
I for one support that the late game is Mighty Whitey as my rage can wait until after wee man’s swim lessons.
HULK SMASH while falling the fuck down.
He reminds me of a Bo Jackson, Christian Okoye or Lawrence Taylor when they first came into the NFL in that they were too strong and powerful and defenders just didn’t know what to do with them.
nods in Brian Bosworth
Still no Broom?
Y’all could have played ME in midfield today.
Video footage of Hippo running. (begins at 30 second mark)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pzo73jYl3Ew&ab_channel=SaturdayNightLive
That was totally me as a youngster, too. I was the only one in the family who could program the VCR.
Well looky-loo, a LaboUr government, and they still do Remembrance Day after all!
I’m here for the Mandatorium.
Admit it – y’all miss it when it’s gone.
Tis a good way to get a jump on one’s day drinking
Anything I can do to encourage substance abuse, I am proud to serve.
Started a 4 day bender yesterday. Today bff’s bday, tomorrow 2 days lads trip to Vancouver.
Atta boy! Remember to hydrate with ice in those cocktails.
“I want to put the gas dick in the gas tank vag.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BZByvjgem6E&ab_channel=JulieNolke
Does either skull fracture son have truck nutz???
Neither has the balls to buy them, knowing that I’ll make fun of them for days and days.
This looks like a shitty sales rep.
Oh then the manager shows up. She gets it.
Oh then the ad.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DliRyZmzbH0
This feels like the neighbourhood I live in. Almost every one has a giant jacked up, chromed out truck but 99% of them haven’t had anything other than Groceries or sports equipment in the back and the only time they were not on pavement was when they got to the game late and had to park in the unpaved overflow lot
But if their truck has truck nuts then they’re not putting the gas dick in the gas tank vag, which means…
/CHECKMATE TRUCK BROS!
//dick joke
GE “press bulb” in a Rollei polished reflector.
https://ibb.co/F6pnYXq
CORRECTION: Pebbled reflector
Thanks we were confused there for a minute.
Leica 50mm f/2 Summicron-M w/ 81A filter
https://ibb.co/ZGfTMdY
GE “press bulb” in a Graflex polished reflector.
https://ibb.co/drpxwtt
GE “press bulb” in a Graflex polished reflector.
https://ibb.co/S6L2Sqs
Napoli plays here in an hour. Hoping to hold on to thier 2 point lead on top of the table. Do you know who else looks good on the top of a table…
Smiling approvingly at the big D behind her shoulder!
Sick fuck reporting for duty.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Et-qv5tUzM4&ab_channel=DAZNCanada
It’s interesting to see why the L.A. Times didn’t endorse anyone compared to the Post.
https://twitter.com/duderolls/status/1849887110360334356
God Fucking Damn It!
Anyway
https://www.wsj.com/sports/football/army-navy-football-ec3f2c7b?st=gcnNVB&reflink=desktopwebshare_permalink
Army – Navy this year could be very interesting.