Clash of the Titans-Your Ravens/Bills Thread

Apparently it’s going to be a chilly one today in Buffalo-she’s supposed to be around -12 Celsius. For you Los Angelenos, that’s around the temperature that your lavender and roasted pistachio gelato served up by Epiphany (“such a nice smile!”) should be at.

To The Game!

Ravens/Bills:

This is the game that Henry was brought in for. If the field ends up being slippery he’ll be even more difficult to tackle. Of the eight playoff games he’s played, he’s run for 150+ yards in half of them.

-The Bills are very fortunate in that three defensive starters that weren’t available when they last played Baltimore will be on the field today. Cornerback Johnson but much more importantly, linebackers Matt Milano (the signal-caller) and Terrel Bernard should solidify the defense.

-The Ravens have played 10 playoff teams and their record is 7-3 in those games. They surrendered an average of 18.5 points against them. The Bills played only 5 playoff teams and their record was 2-3. More worryingly, they gave up 33(!) points on average.

-That said, Buffalo is now 9-0 at home this year.

-The Ravens are the first offense to pass for 4,000 yards and run for 3,000 in the same season.

-Henry is a load of course but don’t overlook James Cook-of his 16 total TD’s, 13 of them have come after week five.

-Can Baltimore feel good if this tilt comes down to a last-second field goal? Though Jason Tucker finished at 73.3% for the year, that is a career-low for him.

Strength vs Strength: Allen is now the QB with the most rushing yards in the playoffs. The Ravens allowed the fifth-least rush yards to quarterbacks this year.

Have at it.

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Mr. Ayo

MVP: Lamar
LVP: Andrews

Redshirt

Less Thank Seven Days to Wide Right 3

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Everybody did everything right on that onsides kick, including the kicker.

Unsurprised

My ankles hurt watching that replay

Redshirt

QUIT FORGETTING ABOUT DERRICK HENRY, YOU DOUCHE NOZZLE!

Doktor Zymm

I’m not sure I can stay awake for OT, good thing

Horatio Cornblower

David Simon is going to write a 6th season of The Wire focused exclusively on Mark Andrews.

Downfield Matriculator

And where JJFozz has stashed his body parts?

Horatio Cornblower

I expect that to be a significant part of the plot, yes.

litre_cola

Oh Mark Andrews, yikes.

Mr. Ayo

That’s Likely too early of a score.

BugEyedBoo

Not a problem now.

The Maestro

HERE WE GO

Beerguyrob

BUT DID THEY LEAVE TOO MUCH TIME?

Beerguyrob

I guess not.

ThePirateSloth

WOW

ThePirateSloth

DOUBLE WOW

fleshwound_NPG

andrews, and he held onto the ball?!

fleshwound_NPG

NOPE!!!

Beerguyrob

Not every time, it appears.

Beerguyrob

Lamar’s perfect at the two minute drill because doing it in one minute means more time for poopin’.

Redshirt

The Ravens do know we only proceed to the 5th Quarter if the score is tied, right?

Horatio Cornblower

This is gonna come down to a 2-pt conversion attempt because of Harbagh’s dumbass decision to go for 2 with 1:37 left in the 3rd.

LemonJello

Nostradamus!

King Hippo

ok, maybe it’ll end 27-25

Doktor Zymm

Hooray! The snow is back!

LemonJello

Does anybody circle the wagons like the Buffalo Bills?

ThePirateSloth

The Donner Family does

Horatio Cornblower

And nothing ever went wrong for them!

Beerguyrob

They even got a pass named for them. #legends

ThePirateSloth

I want to see the research that shows people who are super into NCIS are ALSO in super into Sydney, Australia.

There’s not even a Naval base in Sydney nor even in all of Eastern, Northern, or Southern Australia.

Horatio Cornblower

I do not want to know anything about those people.

Jimbo

Like QAron CBS did their own research.

Mr. Ayo

Ok, sure. But what about New Zealand?

fleshwound_NPG

mr. brightside you say…

i know its the old evil site, but it was one of the very best vids from that site

https://x.com/MikeBeauvais/status/1215073526736195585?mx=2

Downfield Matriculator

Will the Ravens fumble before or after the 2 minute warning? I am not familiar with Draft Kings or ESPNBet or any of this crap, but I’d bet a beer on just after.

Redshirt

(bets $5 on Punt and Field Goal)

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Gatoraids

Inevitable turnover on the 2pts conversion

Downfield Matriculator

Close — we had the general fuckuppery correct.

Mr. Ayo

GO FOR IT BISON!

ThePirateSloth

I really hope we can stop using Tush Push next season.

blaxabbath

Perhaps it will be the playcall on which a player finally dies on the field. We can call it the Death Blow.

Gatoraids

We are all lucky was invented after Big Ben left the league

The Maestro

Mark Andrews YOU are the new night shift fry cook at the Dundalk McDonalds!

Redshirt

Between this game and Snowmaggedon, this has been a pretty good day for football.

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Unsurprised

It’s a shame it stopped snowing in Buffalo.

Horatio Cornblower

It started again.

King Hippo

Staying up because I need to see if things end 27-19, or 31-19.

Also may have a stomach overfilled with grease and shame.

fleshwound_NPG

fatthew stafford has one too right now to ease the pain

Redshirt

Need to eat more bread to soak up grease and then you’ll have pride.

Don T

This game I call it the 1997 Academy cause they’re avoiding Contact at all costs

Unsurprised

PUNCH-OUT!

fleshwound_NPG

the bounce goes buffalos way

https://youtu.be/fi4H3JWNqQk?t=147

Mr. Ayo

Game. Blouses.

ballsofsteelandfury

Andrews, you dumbass!

Gatoraids

Quoth the Superbowl, nevermore

Unsurprised

Wait a second. This guy coached Big Ben, didn’t he? No wonder he’s obsessed with imposing your will.

Gumbygirl

That was a penalty.

ThePirateSloth

Stop encouraging everyone to cook! You’ll summon an endgame Boss from the Favorite Dad Joke pantheon named Too. Many. Cooks.

Unsurprised
Gatoraids

and you might encourage them to sail around the world and die trying to takeover Hawaii

Gumbygirl

Or be a comedy team with Dudley Moore

Redshirt

Thanks Henry!

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Redshirt

Twice

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Sharkbait

I needed a Henry TD and 2 Allen Passing TDs

Mr. Ayo

comment image

LemonJello

comment image

Unsurprised

Holy shit. Ravens back from the dead

Unsurprised

Again with the inconsistency

Gumbygirl

I want to take a bath. Why don’t these fuckers just skip the 4th quarter and go straight to sudden death overtime?

ballsofsteelandfury

Need to run it again for the Two

Last edited 2 days ago by ballsofsteelandfury
Downfield Matriculator

Harbaugh gonna Harbaugh — just stuffed it down their throats for 70 yards, but let’s have Lamar! cook even though he seems to have misplaced his recipes today

ballsofsteelandfury

Seriously…

Beerguyrob

Again, the Bills cannot stop enjoying watching the Ravens run.

Doktor Zymm

Whenever Henry gets some space and it’s clear just how big of a dude he is it’s just kinda surreal

The Maestro

He’s a giant. I love his high school highlights especially. https://youtu.be/4e2yfWsFk3c?si=H8KbAmVejTo-Zgam

Unsurprised

I should have been a running back in high school. I could have trucked Brian Urlacher like a UHaul

I’d probably also be a bit taller all things considered. Oh well.

Gatoraids

A Polk High Legend

Unsurprised

That’s the dream.

Unsurprised

When I meet the devil (played by Robert Englund), I’ll remember to specify that I want to win the Super Bowl.

Don T

This stream has s hella jumpy. If snything happens, tell the NSA that was a bullshit holding call.

Beerguyrob

After Monday, all they can do is throw paper towels at the problem.

Gatoraids

ran it by the league office in Kansas City and its good

ThePirateSloth

The immense effort it took for me to make it thru church this morning sitting quietly and respectfully without arguing, pointing out flaws in the sermon, or giving my best Al Pacino as the Devil impersonation resulted in such a huge migraine that I’ve been asleep in the darkest of dark rooms for the last 5 hours.

This is what being a good person is like? Ugh, no thanks.

Did Philly ever end up in that tight spot?

litre_cola

Was not fun. Do not recommend.

Mr. Ayo

Buttholes were clenched. Just like BoSaF likes it.

ballsofsteelandfury

Indeed. But there was a delightful release at the end.

As God intended.

Gatoraids

really need to liven it up and have Bring Your Own Blood and Brunch

Mr. Ayo

Not enjoying the Green Bay bias by the NFL. All QBs are wearing a helmet that says Choose Love on the back.

Of course, all of the QBs lasted longer in the postseason then that cheesehead wanna be.

Jimbo

Maybe they mean Courtney.

Beerguyrob

Only because no one listens to The Beach Boys anymore except for their head coaches.

Don T

Evenin. Ive drank some. Can type ‘cause I cooked sammiches 😝

Beerguyrob

I love the fact that the Bills wouldn’t give TSN a press pass, so their FanDuel shills drove down from Toronto just to do their remotes from the parking lot.

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