Hello there fellow DFO’er.  Hope you’re well today.  And thanks for coming back to see last weeks tl;dr of last week as decided by my brain.  There’s no reason as to why some comments make it and others don’t. Seriously. There isn’t.

This weeks cheesy motivational quote is:
The sea is dangerous and its storms terrible, but these obstacles have never been sufficient reason to remain ashore [in bed].”
Ferdinand Magellan

Without further ado, here are the comments of the week.

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This fucking thing.

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Jan. 8th 1989. NFC Championship Game. The Bears had probably their best team since ‘86 and had just won the Fog Bowl a week earlier. But the Niners went into Chicago and just beat the brakes off them.

A lot of things died that day. “Bear Weather,” though the meatball fans still think it exists, proved to be a myth. It was also the last time the Bears were considered consistently good. Outside of a couple one-off out-of-nowhere runs, they’ve been pretty terrible for the next 35 years. But when you are a ten-year-old Col. Duke, you don’t know that. You think the good times will last forever. So I would also say my childhood happiness kind of died that day too.

God damn that team for still roping me in every Fall, like the sucker I am.
Col. Duke LaCross

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Found a funny:

The main difference between Musk and Hitler is that the volkswagen was a reliable, reasonably priced vehicle.
rockingdog

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Wifey and I are on some sort of adventure/experiment/journey thingy and I’ve no idea how it’s going to play out or even what the parameters are. It wasn’t a Jan. 1 decision, surprisingly.

It started with some notion of getting rid of extraneous things but it wasn’t born of some ‘high’ ideal of understanding what’s really important or somesuch nonsense. It was more about, “What can we do without, that we have always done with?”.

The results include-

-I’ve eaten more cottage cheese in the last month than I have my entire life.

-social media stuff is down quite a bit

-red meat consumption is almost nil.

-I’ve lost 15 pounds.

-our cable bill is negligible

-we’re kinda bored in the middle of the day on weekends.

-youngest skull fracture boy is confused.

-our secondary expenses have dovetailed/cratered

-wifey and I have become closer because we’re innnit together.

/stay tuned!
scotchnaut

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What 2025 needs is a jury letting Luigi “Chuck” Mangione walk free.
blaxabbath

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Just checked on a family NCAA pool. Despite knowing fuck all about college basketball. Somehow I’m in a slim 4 point 1st place lead with a $250 prize on the line. I have 3/4 final 4 teams, but only 1/2 of the final with Houston winning it all. 2nd place has 4/4 and Duke winning it all. Not saying Saturday will win it all for me, but Duke going down would do wonders for me.
Sharkbait

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So just to let you in on the glamorous life the Cornblowers lead, we are going to a very fancy wedding this summer.

“Why, whose wedding are you going to?” you ask, humoring me.

“Miss America’s!” I reply, and I am actually not lying. This summer a son of friends of ours will marry the not-quite reigning Miss America, and yours truly will be there. Cool, huh?

You know what’s not cool? When your significant other responds with “Oh sure, we’d love to go to the pool party the next day” where I can walk around in a bathing suit next to beauty pageant contestants.

Looks like I’ve got 4-5 months to lose weight through extremely dangerous diet pills while also somehow bulking up with extremely dangerous steroids. Wish me luck!
Horatio Cornblower

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Hug, call your parents if you can. We had a sudden passing in the family.
litre_cola

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Am watching Futbol SudAmericana as I have an addiction. “Dad, you will watch this from anywhere, even if it isn’t in English. Why?” Better than the news kid. Better than the news.
I am slowly becoming an ostrich with my head in the sand. Just live and exist man.
litre_cola

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I’ve never actually watched the markets open before, but think I’m gonna tune in tomorrow morning. Futures markets are already dire and I’ll be tracking international markets all night. This is a horrible idea, but it IS kinda exciting to watch in an econ nerd way.
Doktor Zymm

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April 2, 2025 6:32 pm
Well, Trump did say he wanted to return America to when it was last great. Never realized it was October 1929.
https://www.cnn.com/markets/after-hours
Redshirt

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Raiders gave Geno Smith an additional 2 years and $80+ million. DYNASTY UNLOCKED!
SonOfSpam

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This year is starting to look a little bit better:

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I have a buzz, my darling dears. It’s wine and weed time in Casa Gumby.Somebody made an offer on my house today, let us dance nekkid and offer up a sacrificial virgin or two to the Gods of Real Estate that the deal goes through!
Gumbygirl

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My wife keeps insinuating I am at fault for her health problems. Take responsibility, I tell her. It’s called a UTI, not an OurTI.
blaxabbath

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I’m sooo in love with a princess. It’s her highness’ Lap Around the Sun Anniversary today, so I am celebrating by:

A.) Dealing with an overdose
B.) Relaying false burglar alarm activations
C.) Burning my tongue with hot coffee
D.) Continuein cellular mitosis
E.) Some combination of above

How are yinz?
WCS

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/wifey wants to do a long hiking vacation which I am good with-however…

Me: “We can’t do this until both Ruby and Molly pass away.”

Her: “But we should do this while we’re both capable.”

Me: “Agreed. However, we’re going to be imposing our pets on someone. That isn’t fair to them.”

Her: “We took care of SIL’s dogs when they went on vacation.”

Me: “WITHOUT MY SAYSO!”

Her: …………………

Caveat: Wifey thinks that all kennels maltreat all dogs all the time (a very slight exaggeration)
scotchnaut

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Run – done 8k
Garden Center – visited 3 plants purchased
Butcher shop – visited 80 euros of high quality meats in the freezer
Eco Center – car load of recycle / proper disposal completed
Lawn – mowed
Weeding – mostly done (it’s never totally done)
Now I am chillin until tonight’s dive bar visit to hear a couple local cover bands (Rush and Judas Priest).
MTF
2Pack

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50th surprise bday party, and i whave so much energy to burn, mrs fozz, not sesat aqui. os it s me an dme. nad i might og punch a treen, jus tto have fun fucking trees
jjfozz

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Something called Jelly Roll is singing country on my TV, time to go Europeaning with Rick Steves.
SonOfSpam

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Is there a gender-specific (i.e. non-woke) expression for the Fightin’ Horatios womens’ team? The Hair-Pullin’ Horatios?
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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We’ll be in the active shooting phase of Herr Fuhrer’s Mad Max cosplay by late-May, so hopefully there still is a 2025 season. Or I will be ded by then, that’d be a’ight, too.

oh HAI, Looming Monday!
King Hippo

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Thanks for all the comments and funny and everything else.

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