There’s only two games in this emaciated slate and one of them features a clash between two 2-loss teams. YEESH!
To The Games!
Giants/Raiders:
If you want to chew your nails in the corner of a dark room rather than take in this fixture I won’t judge. What were the sked-makers thinking? The former hasn’t won on the road all year and the latter has but the one home win. Maxx was shut down for the year and promptly left the building Elvis-like. This has given rise to notions that he’s done in Vegas but there’s a ton of things that can happen between now and training camp. You could say that the Giants season was derailed by injuries to Dart, Nabors and Skateboo but two of those injuries were absolutely inevitable in my mind.
Eagles/Bills:
We can haz a snow game? It’s slushy/snowy here and it’s only a six hour drive to Buffalo so the weather can’t be all that different, can it? Cook is sitting at 1532 yards, a mere 43 in front of Jonathan Taylor so he best get on his horse today. Speaking of rb’s, Saquon has rushed for 100+ in 2 of the last 3-is this an anomaly or a harbinger of things to come? Only The Patullo Knows. I think he’ll get another three digit day because the Bills have allowed 150+ yards total seven times this year.
Do your best under these trying circumstances.
Go for dos, buggalos!
FREE FOOTBALL!
Nevermind, they’re going for 2 even if they score.
TYREE HELMET CATCH RIGHT IN BRADY’S FACE
Can’t believe he didn’t glitch
Notice he AIN’T REFERENCE IT
Bof. Bills are fearless. Five stars
Hook and Ladder trickeration!
Has Kevin Petullo been fired yet?
We has game!
Woo, got voice monkey set up and working with ifttt!
a bills kicker, and hes wearing oj’s number, what could possibly go wrong
Was that the earliest red zone sign off ever?
I recall one ending before 4:00. I’m pretty sure it was pre-pandemic.
congrats raiders
I kept Jints @ RAAAAAiiiii DUUUUURS on the laptop solely out of having paid for Sunday Ticket. Perspective spin: here’s hoping Capitalism owns 100% of my personal regrets.
What in the ____ has happened to Josh Allen?
It turns out rain is his Kryptonite
Which is odd since he’s great in the snow which is just colder rain
Rain saturates, but snow doesn’t? IDK.
Maybe he’s the Russian military during the seige of Stalingrad. As soon as the thermometer drops below freezing this game will be his!
Welcome to Las Vegas, Fernando!
april 9th, 2026
i want a birthday present, dammit
this would also be:
-hugh hefner’s 100th birthday
-160th anniversary of lee’s surrender to grant
In ten years, when has any prediction or wish for his downfall come to fruition?
He’s dodged two impeachments, COVID, a sniper’s bullet, etc. He’s going to live forever like Reagan, Kissinger, Cheney, (Hey, wait a minute … )
those guys did NOT have big mac and oreo addictions, tho
Who knew Big Macs contained adrenochrome?
I’m just saying that I’m always taking the over on any bad thing befalling this man because he’s the moral Teflon Don (in that he’s toxic to everything he touches).
This game is sort of like watching a bunch of adults playing Red Rover
Call me crazy, and conspiracy minded. But Josh Allen can barely walk.
BUF better put him in storage PST haste.
I’m annoyed that these holiday and Saturday games are eating into Red Zone’s weekly and season finale touchdown montages.
tornado warning interrupting my tank bowl watching
late december tornado warning, low teens temps at night right after
welcome to the midwest
It kinda explains why there’s so much religion and racism in the Midwest, there is a LOT of shit they need scapegoats for
In retrospect: all I want for Xmas (I got no gifts! WTF?!), is
1. Niners – Bers be competitive
2. Me being awake
WAIT: I got a candle that smelled awesome. Got a Xmas gift woo!
What scent?
And it’s not a mandle! (those are real!)
I got a candle that smelled awesome
Titans Punter’s Taint #5 is a unique odor, I’ll give you that.
Well if you MUST know, my Ex Wife thought it was the closest snything smelled like 🎶Meeeee🎶 #Really 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Hopefully, this is theoretical, but do the Bears visit the Vatican if they win the Super Bowl?
That would be hilarious
Practically speaking, though, it would be rude not to if invited.
Robert Kraft met with the Pope when he was on his European Grand Tour where Putin stole his Super Bowl ring in St. Petersburg.
Just your usual December Buffalo Monsoon.
I saw Him last night since my friend recommended it back at Thanksgiving. I hate horror movies, and I’m not particularly keen on most contemporary movies where they are so transparent about the themes and symbolism, but they were all so obvious and heavy-handed in this movie that it was funny. Not LOL funny like the dogshit Ari Aster makes (Eddington was so goddamn hilarious), but funny enough to keep me watching.
I do have to admit, though, that pro football is ripe for horror tropes and themes.
I watched Him a while ago. Review: ok movie, dynamite weed.
Oops. Commented on the wrong thread.
Anyway, at least this stupid two-game slate is giving me time to catch up with all the highlight videos on r/nfl.
I’ve been sorting product manuals!
raiders
And like the Raiders, they talk a lot of shit but get wrecked when the game matters.
JFC. I missed the joke. I thought this meant Blitz not Tank
A couple hours later and I’m still angry at my Panthers laying down when a potential division title was gift wrapped to them. I hate this team
Prime Time Game tho
Bof. Overdid the copium as a mixer 🤷🏻♂️
One of the many reasons Pittsburgh gets what it deserves for hiring Rodgers.
20 years of going to Seahawks games, 10 of them whilst wearing a bad ass poncho. I’ve died my hair/beard, been to games in other cities with the poncho, lifted people in the seats next to me over our heads, screamed yelled holla’d…..never been on tv.
This muthafucka STAN Donald happens to go to a game in Charlotte and gets on tv immediately.
It is foretold.
HOX!!!
Lol you been talking to the ghost of my grandparents? I’m still not coming back to the Catholic Church
How does this work now that the Pope is an avowed fan of the Bears?
Are you a dead ringer for Walter Jones? That might’ve helped.
And let’s see that poncho, Wally.
No, I unfortunately look like Not River Phoenix
Can confirm.
Done with my nap. I decided to keep it going after the first hour because fuck it.
Bills better make a game of this. Otherwise, lack of nappy drowsiness might push me to reply to jilted, recriminating texts.
tl dr: time foar TARIFF WHisky
/pours a bit 4 tWBS
“The Autumn Wind is a tank…”
https://youtu.be/dQsjAbZDx-4?si=knLLhIWXmMUVXvYj
Just woke up after twelve hours of domestic violence fun.
I SEE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING HAPPENED while I was asleep.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K2v_bGxlsns&list=PLFi9V6EFsFIl1WqC9nsArzwblGhQQ3qPx&index=16
Upside-Down is still Down per NFL Rules.
This “effort” is embarrassing even for That’s Rikki’s Raiders!
Depends on what the goal is.
Multiview: 2-13 Giants/2-13 Raiders and 10-5 Eagles/11-4 Bills
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times…”
Ouch, helmet to the quad, that’s gonna cramp
BY GOD, THAT’S POISON IVY’S MUSIC!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bvHsiYDs8pU
Operation Kill Dart is still up and running I see
Gives a new meaning to Lawn Dart
Oh yeah, if I watch the regular broadcast of Eagles/Bills I have to mute or listen to Brady
I thought it was iggles/pats when I clicked over
Hello? Echo!
Echo!
echo!
“Pinch hitting for Pedro Borbon… Manny Mota… Mota… Mota…”
Alexa, locate that echo!
Would you care for a muffin?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lpqDTQOFvf0
Oh damn what was that
Stupid Ford commercial. The entire point of working smarter is so you don’t HAVE to work harder. Of course you can do both, but only an asshole would point that out
geno smith understood the assignment
The temp better drop in Buffalo, rain game is far inferior to snow game
There’s no whimsy in a rain game!
Just spent the last hour screwing around with smarthome stuff just to find what I was trying to do isn’t actually possible for some reason
Enshittification strikes again.
This feels like a purposeful insult to Red Zone
I’d love to talk shit with Rikki but I doubt he can get a signal from the depths of the vacuum section of Ikea.
Prison Girlfriend only gets a half ration of Pruno after that game.
DUUUVVAAALLLLLL!
man, a guy stays in indy for ONE WEEKEND…
Give em white castle…clear that right out
SUPER TANK BOWL TIME
Shame that the J-E-S-T didn’t release Marshall Fields so he could participate!