Don’t let the Very Silly Q4 fool you – this was a defensive battle, with great strategy and even better execution (especially by SEA). The truest of slobberknockers. It was not a thing of beauty, perhaps. But as a neutral, I really enjoyed it. Defensing was the name of the game in 2025, and that carried straight on through into January and February.
Give Touch of Downs credit, the P*ts gameplan was 100% “make Sam Darnold think” – and he didn’t shit himself. Flirted with a few pickerceptions, yes. But given the amount and quality of pressure? A good jorb, overall.
But it will be Drake Maye seeing ghosts after this one. They stunted him, they moved their pressures around. They got home with FOUR, meaning the subpar WR corps had no chance to produce. And of course, the run game was a wet bag of poop.
Overall, Seattle are clear and convincing winners, and by a VERY long measure, the best team in the NFL. Dominance unlike we almost ever see in the salary cap era.
Five FGs is an Owl record, so huzzah, Jason Myers. We got to see a very sad onside kick attempt at the very end.
29-13, fin (big assist to garbage time). Also, Bad Bunny is quite the showman. Also further, see y’all in September (heat death of the universe pending).
Watching the Olympic ski jumping and the announcer says “How about we move on to a teenager” and may brain is so rotten I immediately thought “I’ll take ‘Things Steve Tisch Said To Jeffrey Epstein’ for $800, Alex.”
Posting the night thread now because you never know when the Too Many Requests Monkey will start throwing poo.
Hey, I posted the first comment before seeing this but after pooing.
Brought this up at home at the start of the game. “Who do I root for here? I mean the Pats are evil, but not as evil as they used to be. So, root for AFC, or root against the Pats?” Daughter said something to the effect that Bob Kraft is MAGA, so I went with the Seahawks.
Great defensive work. Rams could go with them cause they have great receivers but they don’t have a guy to cover JSN. Pats do but they don’t have the guys to block. They had to run to win.
Loved that. I’m hung over as shit. Watched the game with two patriots fans.
So impressed with the team to beat the rams and niners to get in and in the playoffs and then stomping the cheating, trump loving, sex slave abusing, son tongue-kissing bastards to cap it off.
How’d the birria turn out? (assuming it was fucking delicious, because birria)
It was terrific. Smoky and well seasoned. Just a really good depth to the flavour. My first run at the tortillas failed – too wet. Second go was perfect.
Friend dropped à whole pan of hot spinach cheese dip on the floor fresh from the oven, broke everywhere and all over me. I was impervious to pain at that point in the whisky bottle.
I have multiple trips on uber I don’t remember and there were dogs where I went. I think I played darts.
As far a defensive play is concerned-I’ve said it before-the best game I’ve every seen is my wonderful Giants losing to the Niners on a Monday night by the score of 7-3. That game was so intense I could almost feel the pain of the dudes that were getting tackled.
Absolutely. It’s a beautiful thing to see two teams play good defensive ball like that. Every yard, every first down is worth so much more.
The Browns deserved a shot more than this pats team.
/I wish that the freestyle snowboard competition was done by golf announcers
Announcer: [in a voice barely above a whisper] “This run is for the Gold Medal but more importantly, all the vape sponsorships. Helmi Heikkinen of Finland will be attempting the very rare ‘720 Over-Caffeinated Gyro Blast Half-Hookah With a Braless Flourish’. How is she going to unhook her bra while 30 feet in the air? [takes massive bong rip] The world watches.”
How’s she going to unhook her bra through five layers of gore-tex?
Is she even wearing a bra?
Schroedinger’s Bra
And I thought I was asking the tough questions…
15:08 EST and we’re back.
I thought Lowratio would’ve taken today off, being Superb Owl Hangover Day. I respect the effort. RISE AND GRIND
He’s like a gerbil but with less brainpower.
You, sir, have made a powerful if short enemy.
Watch your ankles.
from reddit post game stat analysis of rushing yards in game
Seattle 135 Yds total rushing
Bad Bunny 124 Yds total rushing
Patriots 79 Yds total rushing
dont have the streaker rushing yds in yet tho
Say BeerGuy Rob’s name, dammit
I thought my cup of schandenfreude was full, but then I read Portnoy’s Complaint.
BWWWAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAHAHA!!!
https://ibb.co/CK1c9fXt
I hope he dies. Of a broken neck trying to suck his own cock.
Lots of depressing masturbation, checks out.
.
This Italian bellissima is making some incredibly clutch shots.
really finding this mixed curling best marriage sport involving couples planning, doing chores and yelling encouragement and disapproval
If I were to assemble a team from the AFC to provide a more competitive Owl, I would stick Josh Allen and Kincaid on the Texans.
I bet the Texans would like to do that, too.
Patriots getting a lot of hype and then not doing jack shit when they really need to is just the reality we’re living in now, I suppose…
Good for Sam, he finally got the 600 lb gorilla off his back.
Now he can celebrate and go to some ‘spin the bottle’ parties, mononucleosis be damned.
plus, that new Wiggles tour…
Have a friend who had a crush on Officer Beaples. Too much WFH around his 4-year-old.
One subtle side effect of the game, the day after means the freeways are wide open.
Enjoy the little things.
I took the day off so yeah, you’re welcome.
The 15 South disagrees! But I think it’s mostly because of the endless and badly planned construction.
Plus coming home from Vegas traffic.
Thanks for the thoughts you thunk over the season, Hippo. I always look forward to this post.
Monday Morning Mock Drafts starts next week! Feel free to make suggestions.
Maybe for anniversary week we could get all meta and do a draft of previous drafts.
get all meta is exactly what Zuckerberg wants you to do, smgdh.
That was a thoroughly enjoyable game. Then again, I’m a Pittsburgh fan that believes defense wins championships. Seattle’s was awesome.
What makes football so compelling is how there are multiple paths/methods to winning. Sure, having the best quartered back is great. But that’s not the only piece of the puzzle. And you can still win if you DON’T have the QB to carry you.
Lots of ebb and flow as franchises punch and counter-punch. A few years ago, it was ZOMG how can the NFC compete with all these elite QBs in the AFC (Allen, Mahomes, Lamar! etc.). Along comes the wagon that is the 2025 SeaTruthers saying HOLD OUR BEER.
At least I have the Rangers to look forward to
Well fuck.
At least we have a captain we can trust to right the—yeah, I can’t finish that one either.
Can someone please explain to me how 81% of the NHL can have a win percentage over .500?
Some teams are REALLY bad.
It’s called fake .500 because of the stupid loser point teams get for being losers in overtime. The Kraken, for example, should be 27-29 in a sane world.
Didn’t even watch 4th quarter because the boy needed soothing. Also, I needed soothing. God dammit. What a miserable rest of the winter it’s going to be.
Will it warm your heart to know the rest of us are happy the Pats lost?
Sole nit to pick about the halftime show: it’s not an authentic boricua wedding unless a couple of tías scuffle over who’s taking home the table’s centerpiece and flowers. But that would’ve been against the twin themes of the halftime show: solidarity and unhinged over-the-top-ness.
Speaking of solidarity, I have one motherfucking jackhammer of a headache, in sober(ish) honoUr of National Hangover Day.
Are you sure that isn’t just Other Hippo preparing to bed down for his long off-season hibernation?
I’m still jacked on all the prescription opiates that I generously consumed yesterday in the name of patriotism (“If I don’t take these extra Oxy’s the terrorists win”).
THIS GUY gets it!!
I read, (on the internet, so take that for what it’s worth), that the couple who got married in the ceremony had really been married before, Bad Bunny had some connection to the couple so he invited them to recreate it during the show.
Bad Bunny’s music is not to my tastes, but he seems like a good guy and he certainly pissed off all the right people. So two thumbs up from me.
Very well could have happened later on off camera, or even beforehand since you just know they weren’t allowed to bring everyone on their original guest list
Another nit about the Bad Bunny show: I was disappointed they didn’t have a guy in a fat suit spray painted orange throwing rolls of paper towels at the dancers.
I was waiting for that during the power lines segment!
One last Superb Owl joke before I begin the long walk into the wilderness that is the offseason.
Totally agree with Majesty: SEA was the best team this season and the Owl was very satisfying. Much prefer good defense and field position battles to 47-43 shootouts.
God Imma miss fitbaw. Agreeable end to a very strange season. Hippo Thoughts 4 Eva!
I enjoyed watching the game, though it certainly did leave a TNF aftertaste. In particular I’m happy that Klint Kubiak is walking out of Seattle on a high note and HEADED TO LAS VEGAS, BABY!
https://www.reddit.com/r/raiders/comments/1qzunz5/klint_kubiak_confirms_that_he_is_the_next_silver/
Good hire, eager to see how y’all screw him up.
“HI, I’M MARK DAVIS!”
Just the thought of Tom Brady being my boss makes me want to curl up in a ball and softly whimper…
Why, because you’re holding out for someone more attractive to sexually harrass you? It’s not gonna happen, buddy.
He was robbed for Super Bowl MVP; Walker didn’t even score any points!
That run he broke in garbage time was a delight, though it really was clear and obvious holding and they were right to call it back.
My gf kept saying “A competent kicker. I wonder what that’s like.”
One team belonged there. The other should’ve been asked for ID and proof of ability.
Honestly, I do think SEA would have kicked Denver’s arse, too. Even with a healthy Nix.
It would’ve been closer though.
More of a game and less of a clinic
As someone living in a town full of Boston transplants, thank you Darnold, for giving us another year of peace.
more production than the crypto ad from last night
That game was over at halftime because the new kickoff rule offers only a <5% conversion rate in 2025.
Sorry that was a grumpy cheap shot. That just felt like a bad game and nothing happened. Not sure how an onside kick could help a Patriots team that couldn’t get a point in the first place. If anything, Seattle would have probably snatched one in the 3rd quarter and stuck NE in their grave before Kid Rock’s line of Comet had worn off.
I don’t care about the halftime show. Never have. Never will.